Love + Sex Archives

breakups

Is it Okay To Write an Apology Letter To an Ex? 10 Queers Weigh In

The concept of the Breakup Apology Letter is a controversial one! Where do you land?

the team

Oct 13, 2025

a woman sits in the foreground looking miserable and left out, while her girlfriend sits with two friends in the background, looking at her with dismay

relationships

You Need Help: My Girlfriend Has No Queer Friends, Is That a Problem?

This is very clearly your problem, not your girlfriend’s problem, and resolving it will be your work, not hers.

Abbie Jones

—

Mar 22, 2022

A white woman with brown hair pulled back into a bun sits on a bed with a white comforter. She is wearing a white T-shirt and plaid shorts. She is leaning forward and placing her hands over her groin.

sex

How I Navigate Sex as a Bisexual Woman With Vaginismus

You don’t have to try to “fix” your vaginismus if you don’t want to. I’m not hyped about doing it, personally.

Ashley Broadwater

—

Mar 10, 2022

Single woman in a swing on the beach at sunset reaches out to the empty swing beside her, seems sad

dating

You Need Help: I Hate Not Having a Girlfriend

Why do you want a girlfriend? Why do you dislike being single? I’m serious! I want you to ask yourself these questions and come up with as many answers as…

Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya

—

Mar 8, 2022

A black and white image shows two women arguing in a kitchen. The woman on the left has pale skin and long, red hair. She is wearing a tank top and gesturing in front of there face. The woman on the right is a Black woman with dark brown skin and long, blonde braids. She is wearing a white tank top and a cardigan, and one of her hands is against her forehead. The image is surrounded by a black, scalloped border with yellow dots.

dating

You’re a Combative Communicator? That’s a Red Flag!

I much prefer relationships that meet confusion with curiosity and center attempts for clarity and mutual understanding.

Chinelo Anyadiegwu

—

Mar 2, 2022

Da Brat & Jesseca “Judy” Dupart kiss at their wedding. There is a minister in a black pantsuit and pink coat behind them, and an arch of purple flowers. Wedding guess look on and smile, all of them wearing shades of pink and purple. MICHAEL SEABROOK/WE TV

celebrities (vapid fluff)

Da Brat’s Wedding Photos Are a Gay Fairytale Designed to Melt the February Ice Around Your Heart

In this post is every photo from Da Brat’s wedding that I could find because Black love is beautiful and we deserve. That is all.

Carmen Phillips

—

Feb 24, 2022

A black and white image shows a Black woman in a collared shirt with curly, shoulder-length hair whispering to woman with long, dark hair who has her hand over her mouth in surprise and is also wearing a collared shirt. The image is surrounded by a yellow, scalloped border with black dots.

dating

You Bad-Mouth Every Single One of Your Exes? That’s a Red Flag!

If your partner always portrays themself as the wronged party in the trials and tribulations of past relationships — red flag.

Taneasha

—

Feb 24, 2022

Against a yellow background, a woman with brown skin and shoulder-length, wavy brown hair puts her hands over her face. She is wearing a sleeveless black shirt and a black watch.

dating

How Ghosting Harms Queer Communities, According to a Philosopher

When I’m ghosted and when others like me are ghosted, it takes on an extra sting.

Em Hernandez

—

Feb 17, 2022

In the bottom right corner, there is a black line drawing of two women with 1950s hair styles whispering to reach other against a teal background. In the upper left corner, there is a speech bubble. Inside the speech bubble, there is an image of a lavender sex toy with a white point on the end.

sex toys

Anonymous Sex Toy Review: The Lovense Hyphy

“The toy comes in a hard plastic case with a clear lid for viewing that reminds me of the cryogenic sleeping pods in Alien.”

Guest

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Feb 17, 2022

Sex Toy Reviews

Do You Love Porn and the Toy Story Franchise? Well, I Have Some Great News!

You've got a friend IN me?

Drew Burnett Gregory

Sex Toy Story: An animated butt plug looks sad

movie reviews

The Vesper Is a Vibrator Doubling as a Necklace Doubling as the Wingman I Didn’t Know I Needed

The whole vibrator-as-necklace thing might seem gimmicky, but the Vesper genuinely looks like a decent piece of androgynous jewelry.

Guest

—

Jun 8, 2023

7 Sex Toys for Fat, Queer Sex and Masturbation

As fat folks, we have to get creative in the bedroom. Fortunately, there are plenty of toys that can help you have your best fat, queer sex with yourself or with…

Kelly J.

—

Jun 5, 2023

The Roslyn Bodysuit Harness and the B.Cush Made Me Feel Hot and Horny

I took the advice of wise strappers before me and wore the harness and b.cush around the house for a while.

Guest

—

May 18, 2023

Meet the Proud Pervs Behind Bedroom Besties, a New Gender-Inclusive Sex Toy Company

Bedroom Besties saw a gap in sex toy marketing. “We realized we could fill that hole — pun fully intended.”

Ro White

—

May 15, 2023

How We Have Lesbian Sex

two women lying in bed with heads on stomach

sex

Lesbian Sex: Your 15 Favorite Ways To Have It

Riese

Mar 1, 2024

SEX

13 Reasons Women In Lesbian Relationships Aren’t Having (More) Sex

“Lesbian bed death” does happen, and many lesbians feel they’re not having enough sex. But…

Riese

—

Jul 28, 2023
SEX

Is Period Sex The Ultimate Lesbian Sexual Indicator?

People who want to have period sex have more and varied sex more often and…

Ryan Yates

—

Feb 8, 2016
RELATIONSHIPS

You Need Help: Is She “The One”?

HOW WILL YOU EVER KNOW?

Ryan Yates

—

Aug 24, 2015
SEX

87% Of Queer Women Are Into Porn or Erotica, But Not All Of It Is Lesbionic

Our latest round of results from the 2015 Ultimate Lesbian Sex Survey is all about…

Riese

—

Jun 18, 2015
SEX

Here’s The Salacious Sex Statistics On Queer Women In Non-monogamous vs. Monogamous Relationships

Everything you ever wanted to know about the sex lives of the monogamous, non-monogamous, and…

Riese

—

Jun 9, 2015
SEX

When Did You Do It For The First Time and How Many People Have You Done It With, Huh?

Oh you know, just the answers to everybody’s favorite two questions ever.

Riese

—

May 19, 2015
SEX

Women’s Best Bet For A Synced-Up Sex Schedule Is Lesbianism

A new survey finds that men and women like having sex at totally different times…

Riese

—

May 12, 2015
HEALTH

Why You Should Care About Lesbian Safer Sex (And What To Do About It)

If sexual health isn’t relevant to your interests yet, it should be.

Christy Duan

—

May 5, 2015
SEX

The 100 Most Ambitious Places You’ve Had Sex

“Lost in the Dole pineapple maze in Hawaii.” “On my back in a Corolla on…

Riese

—

Apr 30, 2015
SEX

Lesbian Sex Gets Women Off At Astronomical Rates, Our Sex Survey Shows

High femmes, women over 35 and people in relationships orgasm a whole lot during sex…

Riese

—

Apr 29, 2015
QUEER FASHION

Here Are Your Very Queer Underwear-Wearing Habits

The Ultimate Lesbian Sex Survey knows what you’ve got on underneath those jeans, and how…

Riese

—

Apr 24, 2015
SEX

41 Feelings You Had About Scissoring

How many of you scissor on the regular? And how many of you remain convinced…

Riese

—

Apr 19, 2015
SEX

50 Fascinating Things You Really Wanted Us To Know About How You Have Sex

“I say a lot of things about myself during sex that I would not say…

Riese

—

Apr 14, 2015
SEX

Queer Women Masturbate More Than Straight Women, Our Sex Survey Says

On the masturbation practices of the 8,566 humans who took our Ultimate Lesbian Sex Survey…

Riese

—

Apr 13, 2015
SEX

The 100 Gayest Places You’ve Had Sex

” The back of a Jeep next to a beaver pond. That’s right. Beaver. Pond.…

Riese

—

Apr 8, 2015
SEX

How Often Do Queer Women Have Sex?

We’ve got all the numbers on how often you have sex from our Ultimate Lesbian…

Riese

—

Mar 30, 2015
SEX

26 Bits Of Solid Sex Advice You Gave Us On Autostraddle’s Lesbosexy Sex Survey

20. WASH YOUR HANDS IF YOU ATE BUFFALO WINGS BEFORE GETTING LAID, OMG.

Ryan Yates

—

Feb 24, 2015

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Love + Sex

Sex Toy Reviews

Do You Love Porn and the Toy Story Franchise? Well, I Have Some Great News!

The Vesper Is a Vibrator Doubling as a Necklace Doubling as the Wingman I Didn’t Know I Needed

7 Sex Toys for Fat, Queer Sex and Masturbation

The Roslyn Bodysuit Harness and the B.Cush Made Me Feel Hot and Horny

Meet the Proud Pervs Behind Bedroom Besties, a New Gender-Inclusive Sex Toy Company

How We Have Lesbian Sex

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