Love + Sex Archives

breakups

Is it Okay To Write an Apology Letter To an Ex? 10 Queers Weigh In

The concept of the Breakup Apology Letter is a controversial one! Where do you land?

the team

Oct 13, 2025

lonely woman sits alone outside, thinking of someone who isn't there

friendship

You Need Help: My Best Friend Broke Up With Me

How can I grieve this and move on? I assumed it would just happen with time but a lot of time has passed and I’m still stuck.

Yashwina

—

Dec 20, 2022

Jaimee and Lisa on Say Yes to the Dress wear blindfolds and wedding dresses

tv feature

Looking Back at the Queer Episodes of “Say Yes to the Dress”

My understanding of my queerness has evolved significantly since the first lesbian brides appeared on Say Yes to the Dress.

Sa'iyda Shabazz

—

Dec 19, 2022

In the bottom right corner of the image, there is a black line drawing of two women with 1950s hairstyles whispering to each other against a lavender background. In the upper left corner, there is a speech bubble. Inside the speech bubble, there is an image of the Le Wand XO, a black, curved vibrator. The insertable portion has a bulbous end, and the external stimulation portion has ridges. The handle is silver with buttons down the middle.

sex toys

The Le Wand XO Is Chic, Elegant, and Capable of Blasting Your Bits Into Bits

I love that this toy feels like a sleek, adult upgrade of my first vibrator.

Guest

—

Dec 19, 2022

a Black woman making a sad face with her head in her hand is in the foreground, while a group of girls hang out having a nice time behind her

dating

You Need Help: After a Bad Date I’m Worried I’m Unlovable

We live in a world that doesn’t value people of color or women over thirty, so I understand why you feel like this. But you are lovable.

danijanae

—

Dec 13, 2022

Light and dark pink roses are against a pale pink background. Vanessa, a white person with long, brown hair who's wearing a pink dress with ruffled sleeves and a pink KN95 mask, stands in the center holding a bouquet of white and pink roses.

lesbian weddings

I’m a Queer Bride on a Budget — And I Went to a Bridal Expo

Have you ever heard of a Bridal Expo? I sure hadn’t! And did you know there are wedding-themed porta potties?!

Vanessa

—

Dec 12, 2022

two young women lying in a truck bed looking at one another, wearing dark pants, scarves, and long sleeves

friendship

You Need Help: I’m In Love With My Straight Best Friend

There will come a time when you see someone at the grocery store or in class and think “oh wow, they’re cute!” And then you’ll know: the hard work has…

Darcy

—

Dec 6, 2022

A bride in a long wedding gown and veil is running away down a brick path. Trees are visible on either side of her, and hills are in the distance. Her black high heels and white bouquet are on the ground.

relationships

How I’m Rewriting the “Trophy Wife” Script As a Queer Trans Woman

I want to be treasured for my many wonderful qualities beneath the surface and held proudly by the person who chooses to date me.

Summer Tao

—

Dec 5, 2022

Against a purple background, yellow text reads, "G - gold star lesbian." On the right side of the image, there is a comic book drawing of a Black woman with an afro. She wears gold hoops, lipstick, a yellow turtleneck dress, a blue jacket with a red collar, and a red belt with a black and white buckle reading, "MN." She is at an angle, presumably leaning against a wall. Behind her, the background is pink.

sex

The Gay B C’s of Sex: G Is for Gold Star Lesbian

Put on your lesbian hard hats — we’re about to enter dangerous territory.

Ro White

—

Dec 1, 2022

Sex Toy Reviews

Do You Love Porn and the Toy Story Franchise? Well, I Have Some Great News!

You've got a friend IN me?

Drew Burnett Gregory

Sex Toy Story: An animated butt plug looks sad

movie reviews

The Vesper Is a Vibrator Doubling as a Necklace Doubling as the Wingman I Didn’t Know I Needed

The whole vibrator-as-necklace thing might seem gimmicky, but the Vesper genuinely looks like a decent piece of androgynous jewelry.

Guest

—

Jun 8, 2023

7 Sex Toys for Fat, Queer Sex and Masturbation

As fat folks, we have to get creative in the bedroom. Fortunately, there are plenty of toys that can help you have your best fat, queer sex with yourself or with…

Kelly J.

—

Jun 5, 2023

The Roslyn Bodysuit Harness and the B.Cush Made Me Feel Hot and Horny

I took the advice of wise strappers before me and wore the harness and b.cush around the house for a while.

Guest

—

May 18, 2023

Meet the Proud Pervs Behind Bedroom Besties, a New Gender-Inclusive Sex Toy Company

Bedroom Besties saw a gap in sex toy marketing. “We realized we could fill that hole — pun fully intended.”

Ro White

—

May 15, 2023

How We Have Lesbian Sex

two women lying in bed with heads on stomach

sex

Lesbian Sex: Your 15 Favorite Ways To Have It

Riese

Mar 1, 2024

SEX

13 Reasons Women In Lesbian Relationships Aren’t Having (More) Sex

“Lesbian bed death” does happen, and many lesbians feel they’re not having enough sex. But…

Riese

—

Jul 28, 2023
SEX

Is Period Sex The Ultimate Lesbian Sexual Indicator?

People who want to have period sex have more and varied sex more often and…

Ryan Yates

—

Feb 8, 2016
RELATIONSHIPS

You Need Help: Is She “The One”?

HOW WILL YOU EVER KNOW?

Ryan Yates

—

Aug 24, 2015
SEX

87% Of Queer Women Are Into Porn or Erotica, But Not All Of It Is Lesbionic

Our latest round of results from the 2015 Ultimate Lesbian Sex Survey is all about…

Riese

—

Jun 18, 2015
SEX

Here’s The Salacious Sex Statistics On Queer Women In Non-monogamous vs. Monogamous Relationships

Everything you ever wanted to know about the sex lives of the monogamous, non-monogamous, and…

Riese

—

Jun 9, 2015
SEX

When Did You Do It For The First Time and How Many People Have You Done It With, Huh?

Oh you know, just the answers to everybody’s favorite two questions ever.

Riese

—

May 19, 2015
SEX

Women’s Best Bet For A Synced-Up Sex Schedule Is Lesbianism

A new survey finds that men and women like having sex at totally different times…

Riese

—

May 12, 2015
HEALTH

Why You Should Care About Lesbian Safer Sex (And What To Do About It)

If sexual health isn’t relevant to your interests yet, it should be.

Christy Duan

—

May 5, 2015
SEX

The 100 Most Ambitious Places You’ve Had Sex

“Lost in the Dole pineapple maze in Hawaii.” “On my back in a Corolla on…

Riese

—

Apr 30, 2015
SEX

Lesbian Sex Gets Women Off At Astronomical Rates, Our Sex Survey Shows

High femmes, women over 35 and people in relationships orgasm a whole lot during sex…

Riese

—

Apr 29, 2015
QUEER FASHION

Here Are Your Very Queer Underwear-Wearing Habits

The Ultimate Lesbian Sex Survey knows what you’ve got on underneath those jeans, and how…

Riese

—

Apr 24, 2015
SEX

41 Feelings You Had About Scissoring

How many of you scissor on the regular? And how many of you remain convinced…

Riese

—

Apr 19, 2015
SEX

50 Fascinating Things You Really Wanted Us To Know About How You Have Sex

“I say a lot of things about myself during sex that I would not say…

Riese

—

Apr 14, 2015
SEX

Queer Women Masturbate More Than Straight Women, Our Sex Survey Says

On the masturbation practices of the 8,566 humans who took our Ultimate Lesbian Sex Survey…

Riese

—

Apr 13, 2015
SEX

The 100 Gayest Places You’ve Had Sex

” The back of a Jeep next to a beaver pond. That’s right. Beaver. Pond.…

Riese

—

Apr 8, 2015
SEX

How Often Do Queer Women Have Sex?

We’ve got all the numbers on how often you have sex from our Ultimate Lesbian…

Riese

—

Mar 30, 2015
SEX

26 Bits Of Solid Sex Advice You Gave Us On Autostraddle’s Lesbosexy Sex Survey

20. WASH YOUR HANDS IF YOU ATE BUFFALO WINGS BEFORE GETTING LAID, OMG.

Ryan Yates

—

Feb 24, 2015

Become a Member

Become a Member to support queer journalism

What You Get:

EXCLUSIVE AF+ CONTENT

AD-FREE READING EXPERIENCE

PRINT MAGAZINE DELIVERED FREE

LEARN MORE

Become a Member

Become a Member to support queer journalism

EXCLUSIVE AF+ CONTENT

AD-FREE READING EXPERIENCE

PRINT MAGAZINE DELIVERED FREE

LEARN MORE

Don’t want to see ads? Join AF+

Account Account

Love + Sex

Sex Toy Reviews

Do You Love Porn and the Toy Story Franchise? Well, I Have Some Great News!

The Vesper Is a Vibrator Doubling as a Necklace Doubling as the Wingman I Didn’t Know I Needed

7 Sex Toys for Fat, Queer Sex and Masturbation

The Roslyn Bodysuit Harness and the B.Cush Made Me Feel Hot and Horny

Meet the Proud Pervs Behind Bedroom Besties, a New Gender-Inclusive Sex Toy Company

How We Have Lesbian Sex

SEX

SEX

RELATIONSHIPS

SEX

SEX

SEX

SEX

HEALTH

SEX

SEX

QUEER FASHION

SEX

SEX

SEX

SEX

SEX

SEX

Become a Member

What You Get:

Become a Member

Account