Letter From Your Editors

Hello, such baby angels!

This is Heather, writing to you this month because Riese is tucked away deep inside a writing cave finishing up a personal essay for our Bad Behavior Issue, which is coming to a close and honestly we could not be prouder of how it all shook out. It seems like ten minutes ago half of us were dying of scarlet fever at our senior staff shakedown as Riese hunkered down over a piece of poster board brainstorming theme ideas and telling us to stop proposing “ghosts.” And now here we are, having published two entire months of ravishing new voices with dazzling new graphics. Anyway, I’m excited for you to read Riese’s contribution. She’s been working on this a long, long time.

This month Laneia asked us to pose for a photo with something we can’t live without, which frankly didn’t feel like much of a challenge as we’re all CLINGING to our small comforts in the face of the increasingly horrifying news cycle (and the fact that the news cycle could get more horrifying).

Top: Yvonne + tacos // Carmen + new glasses // Raquel + nature // Al(aina) + Huji app // Heather + coffee // Casey + Stila Liquid (Beso) // Sarah + Carol
Bottom: Carrie + face masks // Riese + Madewell bralette // Molly + wireless headphones // Stef + pleather jacket // Alexis + green tea // Rachel + melatonin // Laneia + Madewell duster

We’re also clinging to you, and we hope you know it. This month, we gave you some more advice, straight from your questions in the A+ Inbox, ponied up some answers to some questions you’d been asking, brought you an anonymous sex diary, and two A+ roundtables about forgiveness and doing the things we needed to do for the money we needed to survive.

We also faced the fact this month that Trump’s presidency has gutted our news and politics coverage. We couldn’t figure out which of the daily disasters to cover. We couldn’t figure out how to compete with mainstream news sites that have begun covering LGBTQ issues, or with LGBTQ sites that are able to afford full-time news staffs. So we just shrunk. We acknowledge that and have now assembled an interim politics team to try to find our way forward, starting with a comprehensive voting guide for the upcoming midterms. Our TV team enjoyed huge success this month with the launch of our own Gay Emmys, which were celebrated by so many celebrities! Sara Ramirez also shouted us out (finally! We’ve been chasing her on Twitter for years!).

We’re holding you close to our hearts during this brutal time of political turmoil, and we’re so thankful to you, more than ever, for your continued support of us through A+.

Treat yourself to a last-of-the-season ice cream. You deserve it.

Love,

Heather

Co-Signed by Riese / Laneia / Rachel / Yvonne

Top 10 Most Popular Posts From August 2018

These posts were hella popular last month.

1. VIDEO: Lesbionic “Lizzie” Trailer Drops, Features Kristen Stewart and Chloë Sevigny Loving Each Other and Patricide, by Riese
2. 14 Feel-Good Summery Lesbian Movies for Summer Lesbianing, by Heather
3. BREAKING: Cara Delevingne and Ashley Benson Are Definitely Dating, Kisses! -A, by Riese
4. 25 Streaming Movies With Hot Lesbian Sex Scenes, by Riese
5. Constance Wu’s Andi Chases Elusive Orgasms in Indie Lesbian Film “The Feels,” by Heather
6. “The Spy Who Dumped Me” Is a Hilarious, Action-Packed Adventure All About Best Friendship, by Kayla
7. Satellite of Love: Queer Horoscopes for August 2018, by Corinna
8. Starstruck: What Your Moon Sign Says About Your Romantic Compatibility, by Jeanna
9. Straight People Watch: Summer 2018, by Erin
10. No Filter: Ashley Benson Perfected the Lesbian Thirst Trap Just for You, Cara Delevingne, by Stef

Nine Important Excerpts From Editorial Conversations

Natalie: Someone described Kamala Harris to me as Senator Bette Porter and now I can’t unsee it.
Heather: my eyebrow just popped up so high

Stef: i have an update which is that my ex emily who i interviewed for a+ got married yesterday and did NOT invite me despite lying and telling me she would in our interview
do i have legal recourse
Sarah: This is rude
Stef: how legally binding are these interviews?
very, right?
Sarah: I’m not a lawyer but I’m gonna say yes it’s very binding

Laneia: excuse me
bisexuals
can you tell me what the emoji mascot is for your people
is it :bat:
:hotdog: maybe
Molly: i thought they were unicorns
unless that’s rude
and i just don’t realize
Laneia: i thought unicorns were just the ones who were chill with being the third in a heterosexual rship
Molly: ohhhhhh
Laneia: i think it’s only ok if they call themselves unicorns, like you and i can’t say that molly
Molly: ohhhhhhhhhhhh
Laneia: BUT MAYBE I’M WRONG
Stef our head bisexual in charge is traveling today so we’re really winging it
my first instinct was the unicorn but then i began to doubt myself
Stef: Ohh I am here to be second in command
Definitely not the unicorn
Laneia: oh thank goodness
Stef: That’s a different dynamic
Personally my sexuality is
:owl:
Laneia: interesting
i see
Stef: But overall hmm
Laneia: how about :rainbow: :ferris_wheel: :star2:
does that say BISEXUAL BONANZA to you
Stef: So much fun at the carnival
It reminds me of Jenny Schecter’s unraveling but maybe that’s appropriate
Laneia: :shenny3:
Stef: And we are historically terrible at graphic design
But I do feel like babadook needs some representation as he is so much of the bisexual experience
Stef: Right???
Laneia: ok i’m going with fun at the carnival
Stef: valid

Laneia: Someone on insta took the time to comment that squirting is peeing
She and the Jenny haters should get lunch
Heather: yeah! a butt sandwich!
Laneia: ! ! !
Rachel: that person killed jenny
Heather: that’s true
holy shit this white dude all over this jenny schecter post is defending rhett butler now and literally just said “Certainly if it was rape, Scarlett didn’t seem too upset about it.”
Laneia: What?!

Kayla: takes a lot of self-restraint to not comment “govern me, mommi” on all of cynthia’s insta posts
Al: kayla
i
Stef: please do that
so happy to have you voting in my state
Al: would it be easier as a group effort bc if so
i will help
Kayla: now i’m just upset i didn’t have a shirt made in time for tomorrow that says “govern me, mommi” with a pic of her face
Riese: you could
potentially
make an iron on image
buy a blank shirt
and iron it on
Kayla: ur right……i can make this happen today
too bad i didn’t think of it before the day i met her. could have explained the etymology of “mommi” to her

Heather: colette’s pr said i can have 30 minutes with keira knightley. do you think i can say “i’m good, but can you just ask her to confirm that bend it like beckham is gay?”
Laneia: !
30 mins seems like an awfully long time actually??
Heather: i agree
“great now onto my next question. pride and prejudice: also gay?”
Laneia: i mean these are both extremely valid and topical
Heather: “you were in fact being stalked in love actually, right?”
“speaking of abominations, the ending of pirates of the caribbean 3…?”

Sarah: anyway, our meeting was in the penthouse and they work on the same floor as high times
and when we were coming out of their office, these two hot girls from high times were having cheer sex with Riese
and they both waved and said “hiiiiii”
it was a lot
TM
Laneia: what is cheer sex????
Sarah: have u not seen bring it on
it’s basically when you eye fuck someone from afar
Laneia: oh i see
I HAD FORGOTTEN THAT LINE
clearly it’s time
for a rewatch

Heather: EBONY MAGAZINE@EBONYMag: “This is not a drill! Warner Bros. is reportedly considering Michael B. Jordan to play Superman following a report that Henry Cavill will no longer appear as the character in the DC film! #BlackSuperman”
Carmen: NATALIE HOT BISEXUAL APPROVED CONTENT HERE FOR YOU
Natalie: I FEEL SEEN
Also, I’m pretty sure Heather likes him as much as me.
Heather : Michael B. Jordan :: Riese : Hondo/Shemar Moore
Heather: (it’s true!)
carmen heard me go on a drunken rant about him the other night
Riese: WALLACE
Natalie: WHERE’S WALLACE, STRING?!
Heather: AND VINCE Y’ALL
Riese: honestly third saddest tv death for me in the history of tv deaths
1. poussey, 2. dana fairbanks, 3. wallace
Heather: anyway that’s two emmys he shoulda had
Riese: i know i was so excited when he came back to life to play football for coach taylor
Heather: stacy’s got a headcanon au that wallace went into witness protection and ended up in dillon, texas
lol exactly
Carmen: I will be so happy to go on my version of a drunken rant about how if michael b jordan was white he’d be halfway to an EGOT by now

Heather: press release subject of the day
“Beyoncé of Books and Latina Ellen DeGeneres Amalia Andrade brings YOU ALWAYS CHANGE THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE to the U.S.”
Laneia: wow
bold move amalia
Heather: they sent me an arc of this book and it was sitting on the kitchen table with all the other arcs that came last week and stacy was like EXCUSE ME WHAT IS THIS
so why don’t you answer for THAT, beyonce of books!

Heather: goooood morning from rainy new york city where the new york times film critic laughed — solo and uproariously — at two early jokes in colette intended to show what a dick her first husband was, and then promptly fell asleep and snored through the rest of the film.
Laneia: whaaaaat
Heather: mmmhmm
men! they’re fucking terrible!
Laneia: useless at best
Heather: amen
at least it put me in the mood to write an amazing review of the lifetime show you!

Laneia: GAYS, EXCUSE ME. this is the author of the book ‘her blood is gold’ which changed my life and is the reason i feel the way i do about my period !!!!!!!

Useful and witty article on finding the right menstrual cup and ways to make it work well for you. https://t.co/TwI1NyUDQX via @autostraddle

— Lara Owen (@laraowen) September 25, 2018

Y’ALL

Al: :divacup:
Sarah: OMG Laneia!
can i retweet this and say this
Laneia: i think i’m going to be a total dork and reply to her so maybe don’t ! idk!
Sarah: ok!! <3
ahhhhh
Carmen: Congratulations Laneia!!!! This is AWESOME! :divacup: (edited)
Also I had a 30 minute conversation with my post-menopausal mother today about cups and thinx underwear, _all_ because of your article! which is still roaming around in my head! so
(she had never heard of either! her mind was blown. haha.)
Laneia: !!!
i am straight up about to tell someone that her book changed my life
in those words
just like in the movies
Siobhan: authors love being told that
she’ll love it
Laneia: LARA OWEN JUST EXPRESSED CONCERN WITH HOW MUCH I BLEED
THIS DAY COULD NOT GET ANY BETTER
FOR ME PERSONALLY
Vanessa: LANEIA MAZEL TOV
THIS IS HUGE
Molly: IM SORRY I DIDNT UNDERSTAND WHAT A BIG DEAL THIS WAS FOR YOU, PERSONALLY, Laneia, WELL DONE
Laneia: THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR SUPPORT DURING THIS CELEBRATORY TIME
Molly: Our Slack is just what everybody imagines it is

Meet A New Contributor!

Get to know some of our newest faces.

Jeanna Kadlec, Contributing Writer

Twitter: @jeannakadlec
Newsletter: tinyletter.com/jeannakadlec

What would be your superpower and why?
Powers over the elements, for sure. It can be used as offense and defense in a fight, as well as basic things like survival, mitigating weather conditions, building shelter. Elemental powers would be the most practical and versatile, by far.

If you could invite four famous people (dead or alive) to dinner, who would you choose and why?
Zenobia, Cleopatra, Catherine de Medici, and Elizabeth I. Great rulers of history — and you know there’s another side to all of their stories. Christina of Sweden, who was pretty explicitly queer, is a close fifth.

Describe the worst date you’ve ever been on.
The one that immediately comes to mind is the date my ex-husband took me on for my birthday the year I was coming out and working my way up to a divorce. We went to some fancy restaurant in Boston where I kept running into the bathroom to cry — but I have a feeling that’s not the question you’re asking here.

Honestly, my only “bad” dates with women have been ones where we’ve obviously had nothing in common and I usually ended up carrying the conversation. Compared to most stories I hear from my cishet friends who date men, that is pretty damn mild.

Who was your first woman celebrity crush?
Shakira — the “Wherever, Whenever” video made an impression on me. I watched it more times than was probably reasonable for an ostensibly straight fundamentalist evangelical 13-year-old. It hindsight, it was a classic be her/do her paradox.

Which part of your astrology chart resonates with you the most and why?
Usually it’s my Capricorn sun and moon, but I’ve really been feeling my Mars in Scorpio. It’s right next to Pluto in my chart, so it’s pretty intense. Also? It’s in my 10th house (the zone of career and public recognition), which can make the already-workaholic Capricorn tendencies kick even more into overdrive. I have drive and ambition in spades.

What’s something you’ve been really proud of lately?
The personal essays I’ve written over at Narratively (about A-Camp!) and Off Assignment (about leaving grad school). What’s really enabled those kinds of essays (as well as the rejuvenation of my newsletter, which is entirely short personal essays) is a lot of the work I’ve been doing in therapy over the last year. It feels like I’ve made some quantum leaps and have unlocked some major things, and that feels good — if only because more access to my emotional self means that the writing is getting better. Or at least more honest.

Four Million Vulvas Worldwide

Rachel: y’all

Two Lips dot VIP: TWO L(I)PS is the world’s first luxury intimate care range for the vulva, developed by the global authority in vulva care with 20 years of industry experience. After treating nearly 4 million vulvas worldwide, TWO L(I)PS is now ready to disrupt and redefine the vulva space with cutting-edge luxury vulva care products

Heather: what now
dot vip!
Rachel: I feel like i’m having a stroke
Heather: FOUR MILLION VULVAS WORLDWIDE
nothing is real anymore
this is the thing that has finally convinced me we are living in a simulation
Rachel: is it worth it to write a gonzo piece on this if the price is everyone I ever have had sex with, am currently having sex with or will have sex with being able to google that I put a sheet mask on my cunt
and also my mom
Heather: i mean
yes
Laneia: yes
Rachel: let me ask liz if this is gonna make my pussy fall out of my body or something first
Heather: also can you truly — in your true heart — think of a better headline than “i put a sheet mask on my cunt”
Rachel: “i put a sheet mask on my cunt and all I got was this t-shirt, and maybe bacterial vaginosis”
Heather: “it’ll take four to six weeks to tell”
Rachel: I have read their entire website and I still cannot figure out what “results” you will be able to “tell”
Yvonne: omg please make this happen
and also WHAT?
Heather: what! is this graphic! a zipper vagina that opens into the literal sun???
Rachel: liz is taking a very long time to answer and it’s making me nervous
Yvonne: AHHH
Rachel: ugh liz says no
Yvonne: :disappointed:
but also i had a feeling that was the answer
Rachel: true friendship is when someone else has higher standards for what you put in your vagina than you do

What We’ve Been Reading

Vanessa: Stray City by Chelsey Johnson

Laneia: Sat, Fat, Acid, Heat by Samin Nosrat

Heather: Akata Warrior by Nnedi Okorafor

Casey: Son of a Trickster by Eden Robinson, The Pisces by Melissa Broder, and Policing Black Lives: State Violence in Canada from Slavery to the Present by Robyn Maynard

Riese: The Chronology of Water, by Lidia Yuknavitch

Carrie: On the Other Side of Freedom: The Case for Hope by DeRay Mckesson

Natalie: American Like Me by America Ferrera

Alexis: Trail of Lightning by Rebecca Roanhorse

Al(aina):Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe by Fannie Flagg

Sarah:Pages For Her by Sylvia Brownrigg

Raquel: Ponti by Sharlene Teo

Carmen: Her Body and Other Parties by Carmen Maria Machado

MEET AN EDITOR’S PET!

Get to know some of our staff’s pets. Today we’ll get to know more about Yvonne’s dog Tungi!

1. What’s your favorite food (includes human food)?
I LUB CHKN. But my mommas don’t give it to me because then I leak butt juices on the floor. I just want one taste! I sit very close to them and very still like a good boy while they eat it and I hope and hope they give me a bite. My mouth leaks too when I smell chkn and my mommas get so mad and I don’t know why. I like to eat chkn because it is delicious.

2. What’s your most perfect sleeping scenario?
I have a nice comfy square on the ground that is very good for a snoozle. It’s very soft. I like soft. My second favorite place for a snoozle is under my momma’s desk. It’s like a cave!

3. If you could have a home on the beach, near mountains, or in a lush forest, which would you pick and why?
One time I went to the beach and it was no fun, I tell you. The brown stuff on the floor didn’t taste good. I only liked the beach when we were on the big white boat and I saw the weirdest, big fish in the water! I want to live in a forest because I love hiking! I love sniffing everything and figuring out who was there before me.

4. What’s your favorite outfit?
I love being naked like my mom (Gloria).

5. What do you wish you could say to your mom?
TAKE ME OUTSIDE. I WANT TO PLAY. LET’S GO ON A WALK. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE.

Original graphic for For Your Consideration: Pasta for Breakfast

SLACKERS

We were bummed Cynthia Nixon lost the NYC Democratic governor’s primary, but Stef made the absolute most of it.

Yes, I like to eat a Cinnamon Raisin Bagel with… lox, capers, red onions, cream cheese, and tomatoes.

Give a few bucks to help support our campaign in the last days before the primary and enter for a chance to have YOUR favorite bagel with me: https://t.co/Q9Whsj4T6j. pic.twitter.com/pkfjRLNZuT

— Cynthia Nixon (@CynthiaNixon) September 11, 2018

Cinnamon Raisin Bagel with Lox: An Essay by Stef Schwartz 

THEY LITERALLY HAD TO PHOTOSHOP THIS BECAUSE NO SELF RESPECTING BAGELSMITH WOULD MAKE IT. “CAN WE GET AN INTERN TO PUT SOME CAPERS ON LOX?? WITH LIKE AN ONION STICKING OUT?” listen i think it’s gross cuomo linked her to anti semitism but now that i see what kind of bagels she’s into i can’t help but wonder. IS THIS NOT A MAJOR CHOICE. i am thrown. i still want her to govern me. i want her to conduct the subway train that takes me to work. i’m gonna be so mad when she loses. sigh. it sounds like she’s been trailing hard in the polls for some time but they’re also i think as someone said above definitely scared of her. my parents who i am pretty sure agree with everything she stands for rolled their eyes at me really hard when i told them i was voting for her. BUT WHATEVER. back to my point, i appreciate this idea that if you donate you can win a chance to make her eat a better bagel but i also am dying at the fact that they were like “wow she ordered this insane bagel combination, we should post a photo of it for this contest” and literally everyone was like “i will never make this bagel or order it ever.” “fuck do we have some stock images of dill?”

September 11, 2018

anyway i made you guys something.

September 13, 2018

Halloween Retro-Reading

Halloween is coming up and I bet you’re excited. Here are some posts to get you in the mood to be a sexy Robin Hood.

via 21 Things You’ll See at Every Queer Halloween Party This Year

Ain’t Afraid of No Ghosts: Talking to Ohio’s Queer Ghost Hunters About LGBT Hauntings and History, by Rachel (2016) – Rachel hung out with a bunch of queer ghost hunters in the midwest for you! It’s a real thing

12 Couples Halloween Costumes For You and Your Taller or Shorter Gal Pal, by Riese (2015) – This post ended up being like 50x more popular than I’d anticipated, so I’m sharing it with you, now, here.

Women That Go Bump In the Night: Lady-Monsters Of Cinema, by Stef (2014) – This is a really important and very funny retrospective of all types of monsters that might be relevant to your interests.

Family Photo Album: What We Were for Halloween Way Back When, by Carmen Rios  (2014) – Even if I didn’t know and love everybody in this list, I would still love this post because look at these adorable kiddos and that wild lil tomato!

Halloween Dreams Come True: Robin and Carly as Morticia and Gomez Addams (!!!), by Stef (2013) – This was the most epic Halloween costume situation of all time, nothing has ever been this wonderful before or since.

Community Photo Gallery: You All Looked So Good On Halloween, by Vanessa (2017) – You did! You all looked so great last year!

SHE TOOK THE MATTRESS

Laneia: mmmmkay what about:
for roundtables
board game you’re winning
fave queer historical fig who is dead
first person you dated
pants you’re grabbing in a house fire
number of spiders you estimate you’ve swallowed
Riese: people swallow spiders!!?!?!?!?
Rachel: I want favorite thing you’ve kept from an ex
like physical item
Laneia: oooooh
Riese: oooo yes
Laneia: yes supposedly we swallow a ballpark figure of spiders in our lifetime
oh
Riese: how about favorite thing an ex has stolen from ME
which i think i already wrote about on my blog but i have new complaints to file
Laneia: i was just sitting here thinking what have i stolen from my ex hmmmm and then i remembered
and it is
Riese: your children
Laneia: my mattress
Riese: oh
ok fair
Laneia: I TOOK THE MATTRESS
i didn’t even ask her
it made sense at the time but then a couple of years ago i was like wait
it’s weird that i took that mattress and weirder still that we haven’t replaced it yet
AND ALSO A LITTLE GROSS
like one long flat sex toy
Riese: mattresess are expensive
and also mattresses are clogging up our landfills and probably killing sea turtles
they are like impossible to destroy, and nobody wants a used mattress
Laneia: i’m buying us a mattress for xmas, landfills be damned SEA TURTLES BE DAMNED
Riese: it’s better for the planet to keep your mattress, so what you’re really doing here is being earthy
Laneia: i want to be fancy
Rachel: i’m glad we’re bringing this up because I think about it not insignificantly
Laneia: it’s so much
i wish i could burn mine right now
you can burn them right, it’s not like tires
like _if the opportunity arose_
Rachel: i think that sounds nice
like that barenaked ladies song about the field of burning tires
Riese: i’m glad we’re bringing the barenaked ladies up because i think about them not insignificantly
Rachel: same!
they have a lot more albums on spotify than you would think

Five Posts Rachel Can’t Believe You Motherf*ckers Didn’t Read Last Month

How to Have a Difficult Conversation 101: Tough Love From @xenaworrierprincess, by Maddy

I am a little biased here, as someone who also provides advice over the internet, but I could not cosign more enthusiastically enough what Maddy says here: maybe 75% of the questions we ever get in have, as their foundational answer before anything else could even be addressed, “well, you need to talk to them.” (Another solid 15% the answer is just that you need to let go of your straight girl crush, it’s not worth it.) She gives some really excellent advice here for so many situations in life, in relationships or otherwise, and in such a wise and compassionate way!

ROOM 25: I Swear Noname Look So Regal, by Alexis

I had had this album on my list to take a listen to when I got around to it, but this review made me turn it on before I was even finished reading it. I don’t know how to speak more highly of a music review! Alexis is such a lyric writer and could make the side of a cereal box sound like poetry to me; this is a gorgeous thing to read and accompanies a gorgeous thing to listen to.

Zumba Sisterhood of the Traveling Hips, by Yvonne

If you aren’t killed dead by this title I don’t want to be friends with you, first of all, because it cracks me up. Second of all, listening to Yvonne’s updates about her Zumba class through instagram stories and Slack has been one of the small joys of my life for the last year or so, and I’m just so delighted I got to deepen that experience by reading her words about it. You should also get that small joy! Go give it to yourself no!

邊界姦情, Asunto De La Frontera, Border Affair, by Yiling and Maria José

I’m so proud of all the pieces that we’ve published as part of the Bad Behavior issue, but this is one I particularly remember from the very first moment of reading the submission in Airtable; it was so unique and like nothing I had read before, and I kept turning it over in my mind. Have you read this one yet? we asked each other. We all have, and now you can too! I don’t want to try to explain it, I want you to experience it like I did, so go do yourself a favor and spend some time with it.

Harlots’ Season Two Is Queer, Here, and Transcendent, by Riese

For the life of me I cannot understand why more of you aren’t watching Harlots. With all due respect and with deep love and care, we as a community will watch some real garbage if it has gay women in it — we will watch things that aren’t even TV shows, but ADVERTISEMENTS! And this show has SEVERAL couples with multi-season storylines, in addition to Most Obvious Dyke Pro Domme of 1763 Nancy Birch, and it’s streaming on a major platform? It’s actually good, you will definitely leave with at least one crush, also I think the interstitial music is great? I cried watching the scene when [character] is getting whipped in public and everyone responds by [doing thing], and I still get fucked up thinking about it! Anyways don’t listen to me, listen to genius TV critic Riese Bernard about why you should be watching this show!

Reneice’s Pick of the Month

I discovered this lip balm last month and I have never been more in love with a lip balm in my life. It actually hydrates your lips, goes on smooth, lasts a substantial amount of time, and smells delicious. This is serious cause I’m one of those chapstick obsessed queers – I was the baby queer with like 15 flavors on my lip smackers keychain – so know that when I say Supergoop is the best, it really is the best!

Social Media Spotlight

If you’re not following us on Instagram, you must rectify that immediately. Laneia has taken over the whole shebang and our stories are a thing of true beauty! Here’s another true beauty: Heather trying to make a video to promote her guest appearance on Getting in Bed With Kristin.

EVERYONE IS LESBIANS IN WIND GAP

Kayla: y’all i watched all of Sharp Objects twice in the span of 48 hours help
Heather: kayla! did you sleep!
Kayla: not really!!!
Rachel: wow! how are you holding up!!
Kayla: barely!
Rachel: i can imagine!
Kayla: but…i loved
Rachel: did you enjoy the dead lesbian mention
Kayla: lol i can’t believe that was the only mention of lesbianism
Rachel:
right?
Kayla: wind gap for sure is full of lesbians
Rachel: do they just not leave their homes
what are they up to
drinking a warm high life on the porch having confused thoughts about their high school cheerleading cohort
Kayla: exactly
i mean were ann and natalie NOT dead lesbians?
Rachel: wouldn’t say no to a pitch about the life of a lesbian in wind gap
is all
Kayla: wowowow
in a town where roller skates seem to be the main form of transportation, there’ve GOT to be loads of lesbians
Rachel: see there’s the dek right there
Kayla:!!
lots of stolen glances at cotillions, which i’m sure are a thing in wind gap
Rachel: I feel like a lot of tweens have VERY complicated feelings about amma
we all need a completely psycho early crush to really crack our issues open
Kayla: oh yes definitely
kept waiting for it to be established that neither amma nor camille were totally straight
Riese: amma is so many young lesbians’ first girl crush
because also SHE ENCOURAGES IT
also for sure jackie has had lesbian sex i think right
Kayla: oh yeah totally
re:jackie
do we not think something happened between jackie and adora in their youth
adora seems to……not be very interested in sex with men or even sharing a bed with a man
Laneia: EVERYONE IS LESBIANS IN WIND GAP
Riese: alan definitely has his own gay shit going on
with a sound system that expensive
Kayla:that sound system is his only companion
and his shoulder sweaters
wind gap really is just brimming with homosexuality
i want a hat that says EVERYONE IS LESBIANS IN WIND GAP

XOXO

Team Autostraddle

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!