This is the final installment of the erotica series Constellations, about finding and keeping kink connections and navigating polyamorous love.
Content notes: polyamory processing, make-up sex, manual sex
Bennett put their head down on the table, cradling it in their arms. Their temples pounded. Their mouth was dry and their stomach ached. Their dinner sat on the table, half-eaten: a plate full of chicken and green beans and Bennett’s famous smashed cheesy potatoes. Paige had eaten hers. The candle in the small glass votive had burned itself out and was only a small ring of wax around a nub of a wick.
“I just want to know I’m special,” Paige said in a small voice. She was past the yelling, past the accusations of Bennett keeping things from her, past the insecurities and fear, though maybe not yet past the jealousy. The jealousy surprised her. She was just starting to soften to what was underneath.
That made Bennett’s head spin. Special? Of course she was special. She was their partner, their most precious relationship, their lover of nearly ten years, their most trusted confidant. She had guided and witnessed Bennett through more personal crises, self-awareness processes and growth spurts than anyone else in their life, even including their therapist. And there was that way that Paige just felt like home, like rest and respite and refuge. She smelled like a combination of lavender and musk, with a particular tenderness that still made Bennett’s knees weak and that growl start to build deep in their body. They almost felt guilty by how much they wanted Paige, needed Paige, desired Paige, because they knew — or rather they suspected, maybe feared — that Paige didn’t want, or need, or desire Bennett the same way.
“I don’t even know how to tell you how special you are to me,” Bennett said through the sleeves of their sweatshirt.
“Try,” Paige whispered, verging on tears, her voice fierce. “Please? Just a little?”
“I would give up everything for you. I want us to be stable and I don’t want anything else as much as I want that.”
“You don’t have to —“
“I know. And I’m really glad there’s room for us to explore, to get what we need.” With all of Paige’s other partners, her fetish for variety, her flirtation and all her polyamorous theory put into practice, Bennett had not expected this much upset after telling her about their date with Ella.
The date had gone surprisingly well, and had been more exciting than Bennett even let themself dream. The date that had ended with Bennett and Ella messing around, going further than Bennett usually let themself on a first date. But it was perfect. Beyond perfect. But then there was Paige, and telling her about the date. Bennett tried to be vague, and dial back their feelings a little, but Paige saw through that easily. Bennett was doing better identifying their feelings and sharing them, but still got nervous about these kinds of romantic feelings. They suspected, now, that their fumbling had made things worse.
“I do need this,” Bennett said, surprising even themself. But it was true. “I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t.”
“I know. And I want you to have it, I want you to pursue it. I just want you to be honest with me, and tell me what’s happening.” Paige knelt next to Bennett and put her hand on their arm.
Bennett looked up. Paige’s face was open, eyes bright. Different than the wildness Bennett had seen earlier. Her hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail, tendrils curled next to her face. “I will. I am. Promise.” Bennett took a deep breath. “You are so, so special to me. I want to make a home with you for a long time, I want to keep learning from you, walk this path with you. I love you so much, I’ve never had this kind of deep relationship before. I don’t know anybody like you! You have so much love, such a big heart. I didn’t know my heart could be as big as it is now, just knowing you. I’ve grown so much and I know myself better, because of you, because of how you live your life.”
A few fat tears fell down Paige’s cheeks. “Thanks,” she whispered. Bennett wrapped their arms around her and Paige folded into their lap.
“I want you always,” Bennett said into her hair.
“I want you, too,” Paige said. “And I want to know about her. I’m not threatened, honestly I’m not. I know you love me. I just want you to be honest with me. Otherwise I get scared of what you’re hiding from me. I want to know about what you like, I want to celebrate it with you. I wish I could be that for you, but the ownership thing you have, I just don’t have it. I want you to have what you want.”
Bennett squeezed her tighter.
“Kiss me?” Paige whispered. Bennett’s knee was twitching with the pressure of Paige sitting on their thigh, and, glancing at their half-finished dinner plate, they were starting to get their appetite back. But they wanted Paige’s mouth more.
Illustration by Raisa Yavneh
As they kissed, Paige wrapped her arms around Bennett, running her fingers through their hair, fingering the bare skin on the back of their neck. Her skin tasted just a little salty from the tears. She would move in close and then pull back, just a little, just at the last second before their lips touched— a tease, a game she often played, and it both frustrated and aroused Bennett as much now as those make outs on their first dates. It still surprised Bennett, too, even though they know Paige’s style so well.
Without pulling away from the kiss, Paige stood and slid her leg over Bennett, straddling their lap. Their bodies puzzle-pieced together, interlocking; Paige’s belly against Bennett’s, their curves following each other. Bennett put their mouth to her neck, to her collarbone, exploring with soft bites and kisses as they spiraled their arms around her body. Paige arched her spine, lifting tall, and crossed her arms to lift her blouse off from the hem, exposing her skin, bare without a bra. Her ponytail was coming loose and she pulled the rubber band out, letting it tumble down her shoulders. Bennett ran their hands up and down her back, under her long, thick hair, and leaned against her, crushing their bodies together.
Closer. Closer.
Bennett felt that urge, that lust to get every part of their bodies to touch, to be so close, to be inside. That urge that couldn’t ever really be satisfied, they couldn’t ever quite be as close as that urge needs, but they try, they keep trying.
“Baby,” Bennett muttered, as they continued exploring Paige’s chest and breasts with their mouth. “I love the way you taste.”
Paige wrapped her arms around them and pulled in close, rocking gently in their lap in that way that asked for grinding, asked for closeness, asked for more. She sighed with a breathy moan, then cupped Bennett’s face in her hands and bent her head down to kiss their mouth some more. More urgent, this time; more insistent. With less pulling away, less teasing, and her mouth more open.
“Please, put your fingers in me,” Paige whispered, her lips still pressed against Bennett’s. “Please, I need you inside, inside.”
Bennett started rummaging through the long, thick fabric of Paige’s dark blue skirt, looking for the bottom edge to get their hands under it. They smiled, fumbling, and were rewarded with the bare skin of Paige’s legs. They smoothed their hands along her thighs and pulled her underwear aside to touch her cunt, already soft and slick with juices.
Paige nodded, sucking Bennett’s tongue into her mouth. “Do it, I need it, please.”
They slid their fingers around her on the outside, wet and swollen with want, feeling the velvety folds and crevasses, lightly caressing the sides of her clit before pressing their fingers to her opening. Paige was breathing heavy, still muttering, “Please, please, please,” and Bennett, though enjoying the begging, wanted even more to give their love everything she wanted.They slid one finger, then two, slowly inside. Paige closed her eyes and arched her head back, moaning and working her pelvis against Bennett’s hand. A small smile played on her mouth and she took a deep breath, then let out a slow sigh.
“It’s so good, so good,” she murmured. She pulled Bennett close and leaned into them. They moved together, heartbeats in sync up as they fit together, rocking, kissing, breathing.
Paige brought her hand down between them and Bennett moved back a little to give her room, bringing their wrist down to get out of the way. Paige touched her own clit, slow at first, but then faster, building, clenching Bennett’s fingers tighter and tighter until she climaxed, gasping and shouting, dripping into their lap and over their hand.
She was loose and open as she collapsed against Bennett’s chest, licking her own fingers. Bennett slowly slipped out and pulled their arm out from between them.
“I love you,” Paige whispered.
“You’re just saying that because I know how to fill you up the way you like it,” Bennett teased, petting her hair.
“No! Well, I mean, you do, but that’s not it. I love how I feel when I’m with you, I love how you listen and let me share what I need to say. Thank you. You’re so damn hot. I’m lucky to have you,” Paige giggled in that post-orgasm high, and sat up. “Can I … what do you want? Can I do anything for you?”
Bennett kissed her, and Paige moaned. “Yes. But, later. I want to eat something first. And my leg is … kind of … ” They didn’t want to move Paige, but their legs were falling asleep and this chair was quite hard and digging into their tailbone. She took the hint as they started moving and returned back to her chair, pulling her panties out from under her skirt before she smoothed it down.
“Now, can you tell me the real story of your date?” Paige asked. “I really do want to know.”
Bennett nodded, picking up a few green beans with their fingers and popping them into their mouth. “I will. Later, okay?”
“You’re not just pushing me off?”
“No, I just … need a minute.”
“Okay,” Paige smiled. “I get it.”
“I’m not used to this like you are. It might take me a little time. I might be a little … slow.”
Paige shrugged. “So go slow, then.”
Bennett nodded. “That’s the plan.”
Very nice 👌
Love it 💥
Gorgeous