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The Ultimatum: Queer Love’s Bridget Matloff on What the Cameras Didn’t Show You

Bridget Matloff speaks on friendship with Gabby Windey, pressures of reality TV, thoughts on marriage, gender roles, and yes, haircare.

Gabrielle Grace Hogan

Sep 8, 2025

FIRST PERSON

I Was Already Afraid of My Inbox. Then a Death Threat Came

The deadline for my compliance with the “blackmail” had already passed. It was supposed to…

Nico

—

Aug 13, 2025

FIRST PERSON

On Being a Masc Top From Rural Oklahoma

You’ve fucked every lesbian sorority girl in Oklahoma, someone tells me on an app. Well,…

Autumn Fourkiller

—

Jul 23, 2025

A Breastfeeding Journey Of a Thousand Miles Begins With a Single Baby Step

“I woke up feeling like someone had run me over with a truck and I…

Riese

—

Jul 10, 2025

first person

I Was Already Afraid of My Inbox. Then a Death Threat Came

The deadline for my compliance with the “blackmail” had already passed. It was supposed to be noon.

Nico —

Aug 13, 2025

first person

On Being a Masc Top From Rural Oklahoma

You’ve fucked every lesbian sorority girl in Oklahoma, someone tells me on an app. Well, I said. Probably not all of them, right?

Autumn Fourkiller —

Jul 23, 2025

parenting & family

A Breastfeeding Journey Of a Thousand Miles Begins With a Single Baby Step

“I woke up feeling like someone had run me over with a truck and I thought, “I guess this is motherhood.” And probably would’ve died thinking that.”

Riese —

Jul 10, 2025

The Latest AF+ Content

Was I A Fool To Think They’d Kiss Me Back?

Af+

Oct 17, 2025

OK, What If I Don’t Want To Attend My Friend’s Improv Show

Af+

Oct 10, 2025

Is There a “Right Way” To Have Public Sex?

Af+

Oct 3, 2025

The Trans Brooklyn Dykes With a Significant Height Difference Who Enjoy Twilight Cosplay

Af+

Oct 2, 2025

A Fertility Ritual for Queer People on a Pregnancy Journey

Astrology, Tarot & Witchcraft

Sep 29, 2025

One image shows a person wearing black hosiery with their knees pulled to their chest, while the other shows two people beginning to kiss.

af+

I’m Inexperienced and Panicked That I’ll Be Bad at Sex

How to navigate dating apps when you have very limited sexual experience?! Also, a reader feels isolated after experiencing profound family loss.

the team —

Nov 22, 2024

af+

Baby Steps #1: How We Got Gay Pregnant

My wife and I are having a baby and this is the first edition of Baby Steps, a column about the gestation and eventual birth of this human child who…

Riese —

Nov 19, 2024

One image shows a series of I Voted stickers, another image shows a woman visibly stressed out

af+

Should I Dump My Trump-Loving Girlfriend?

Your girlfriend just straight up voted for Trump, so now what?? Also, a reader feels conflicted about Trump voters throwing her baby shower.

the team —

Nov 15, 2024

One image shows a person speaking into a cell phone. The other image shows the same person in a tense conversation with another person

af+

How Can I Convince My Girlfriend To Accept Her Shot at Financial Freedom?

Your parents can help your girlfriend achieve some financial freedom, but she super doesn’t see it that way. Plus, a reader wonders if cis people can use “they/them”?

the team —

Nov 8, 2024

One image shows a person looking distressed and offended, while the second image shows a dinner party from above.

af+

My Ex Would Rather I Rearrange My Entire Life Than Be Friends

Your ex doesn’t want to see you at public spaces, but is that your responsibility? Also, a reader wonders if it’s empty flirting or something more?

the team —

Nov 1, 2024

5 down / 5 letters / Yvie ___, winner of "RuPaul's Drag Race" Season 11

af+

AF+ Mini Crossword Flew Too Close to the Sun

But for one bright and glorious moment, it was perfect.

Rebecca Goldstein —

Oct 30, 2024

53 down / 5 letters / Brie Larson or Halsey, astrologically

af+

AF+ Full-Sized Crossword is Moving In

How are we going to fit all of this stuff into one apartment …?

Darby Ratliff —

Oct 26, 2024

One image shows a person in a suite, the other shows a hand with painted nails holding a red stiletto.

af+

Can I Ask My Non-Binary Partner to Pretend To Be a Cis Man For My Sister’s Wedding?

Is it selfish to ask your spouse to pretend to be someone they aren’t, just so you’re not alone? Also, a reader has penis envy, possibly, maybe?

the team —

Oct 25, 2024

culture

Culture

Hell Yeah, Brother! Trans Dudes Are Kissing in the Wrestling Ring

The horniness of T-Boy Wrestling transcends simple attraction. It’s not just sexy…it’s liberating.

Motti

Aug 14, 2025

Politics + Activism

Fighting for Our Lives

Nico

Jul 24, 2025

AF+

Working Girls: Luxury Escort Charlie Levine on the Rise of Women Clients In Sex Work

Riese

May 15, 2025

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Was I A Fool To Think They’d Kiss Me Back?

You made the first move and have felt weird about it ever since. Also — needing tips on dating in your mid-30s, ’cause it’s not going well so far.

Af+

af+

OK, What If I Don’t Want To Attend My Friend’s Improv Show

Someone must really hate improv — or their friend!!! Someone else is low-key dying that their friend isn’t returning borrowed books on time. And someone else is sweating their ass off on T and needs help.

Af+

af+

Is There a “Right Way” To Have Public Sex?

Your girlfriend loved gym bathroom sex but you’re not so sure you wanna do it again. Also: how to feel sexier while living with long Covid.

Af+

af+

Is It So Wrong To Pick Up My Ex-Girlfriend From Jail?

Your girlfriend wants you to go no-contact with your ex after you picked her up from jail. Also; is it ok to tell your now-sober partner about the mean things they said when they were drunk?

Af+

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Need Advice? Got a Tip? Talk Queer to Us

Hit up our members-only inbox if you need advice or have tips or questions for our team!

Undressed

AF +

Is There a “Right Way” To Have Public Sex?

the team

Oct 3, 2025

Gigi, a 35 year old Black woman wearing a pink pantsuit, with a gray-flecked afro, kisses Indigo, a younger, shorter, Black woman in her early 20's with dark brown skin, golden-brown waist-length braids. They kiss as bossa nova music, indicated by illustrated floating music notes, plays in the background.

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tv feature

The Ultimatum: Queer Love’s Bridget Matloff on What the Cameras Didn’t Show You

FIRST PERSON

I Was Already Afraid of My Inbox. Then a Death Threat Came

FIRST PERSON

On Being a Masc Top From Rural Oklahoma

A Breastfeeding Journey Of a Thousand Miles Begins With a Single Baby Step

first person

I Was Already Afraid of My Inbox. Then a Death Threat Came

first person

On Being a Masc Top From Rural Oklahoma

parenting & family

A Breastfeeding Journey Of a Thousand Miles Begins With a Single Baby Step

The Latest AF+ Content

Fighting for Our Lives

Working Girls: Luxury Escort Charlie Levine on the Rise of Women Clients In Sex Work

Enjoy our content in print form – delivered quarterly to All-Access Members!

All Access + Support Membership Perks

Queer Journalism

30% Off Everything

Print Magazine

af+

af+

af+

af+

af+

af+

af+

af+

Need Advice? Got a Tip? Talk Queer to Us

Undressed

Is There a “Right Way” To Have Public Sex?

Baby Steps

A Breastfeeding Journey Of a Thousand Miles Begins With a Single Baby Step

I Regret To Inform You That Our Baby Will Be Throwing Up On Your Shirt

Our Birth Story Has Severe Features

Baby Steps #6: The Best Laid Birth Plans

Baby Steps #5: Fixing the Window

Baby Steps #4: And I Feel God At This Baby Shower Tonight

Baby Steps #3: Allegedly Essential Baby Products, Looking for Gays On The Baby App and Surveillance Anxiety

Baby Steps #2: Telling Chosen Family, Bonding With Heterosexuals and a Lot of Dog Feelings

Baby Steps #1: How We Got Gay Pregnant

A Breastfeeding Journey Of a Thousand Miles Begins With a Single Baby Step

I Regret To Inform You That Our Baby Will Be Throwing Up On Your Shirt

Our Birth Story Has Severe Features

Baby Steps #6: The Best Laid Birth Plans

Baby Steps #5: Fixing the Window

Baby Steps #4: And I Feel God At This Baby Shower Tonight

Baby Steps #3: Allegedly Essential Baby Products, Looking for Gays On The Baby App and Surveillance Anxiety

Baby Steps #2: Telling Chosen Family, Bonding With Heterosexuals and a Lot of Dog Feelings

Baby Steps #1: How We Got Gay Pregnant

AF+ Interviews

TV FEATURE

The Ultimatum: Queer Love’s Bridget Matloff on What the Cameras Didn’t Show You

GENDER

I Treat My Wife Like a Barbie Doll and She Likes It

TV FEATURE

Mal Wright Didn’t Want To Be Your Favorite ‘Ultimatum: Queer Love’ Cast Member

AF+

Working Girls: Luxury Escort Charlie Levine on the Rise of Women Clients In Sex Work

AF+ Personal Essays

AF+

I Am Not Lorelai Gilmore But I Also Kind of Am

AF+

The Eras of My Bisexuality

AF+

Shame as a Black, Autistic Queer Elder

AF+

Apparently, Shame Tastes Like My Cunt

AF+

“Too Queer, Too Smart” for Abuse

AF+

Unexpected Item in the Bagging Area

AF+

Not Grateful Enough

AF+

What If It’s a Woman?

AF+

Love In A Sinking City: A Queer Timeline

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