by riese & laneia

Stock photography: that underrated art form in which professionals create rights-free images suitable for usage by a variety of magazine and online publications and often this art qualifies as a lesbian pic. We love us some Shutterstock, we really truly do, especially lately as they’ve been beefing up their lesbian section with photos that look like actual lesbians living actual lives. But the Shutterstock archives are still bursting with evidence of misguided photoshoots of times past. We’ve marveled at the oddness of lesbian stock photography before, and provided some homoerotic Christmas shoots, but that was back in the day when we only used Getty Images and now we have a whole new treasure trove to mine over at Shutterstock. Seriously though, who knew that the primary lesbian sex act was standing breast-to-breast, staring at the camera?

25 Pictures Of Lesbian Sexuality According To Stock Photography

1.

uggghhhh my arm is falling asleep
Uggghhhh my arm is falling asleep

2.

Is that a poisonous snake in your hand or are you just happy to see me
Is that a poisonous snake in your hand or are you just happy to see me

3.

Let me get my tweezers and we can take care of that little chin hair lickity split
Looks like your waxer missed a hair

4.

I think a bird just pooped on us
Babe seriously, female ejaculation is nothing to be ashamed of.

5.

shutterstock_74611936
Rosalie swore she was a size M in white thongs, so Bella felt PRET-TY SMUG about proving Rosalie was actually a size S!

6.

You bring me closer to Goddess
No, wait, the Ambien just kicked in. Sorry.

7.

caption
Blair and Shelly figured out how to make sure they’d never lose each other at the Dinah Shore Pool Party again

8.

Oh crap I forgot to turn the oven off
Johanna and Katniss stayed perfectly still so as to blend in with the rest of the presents under Ellen Page’s Christmas tree

9.

See, like they're doing in this episode of The L Word
See, Autostraddle says it’s totally okay to fuck with our clothes on!
What I read in Curve magazine that this is how lesbians have sex
I know it shouldn’t be, but the fact that your bedspread was stolen from Mrs. Abernathy’s Kindergarten class is SUCH a turn-on.
ooooooooo this is fun!!?!!
You’re right, this is so much better than having sex with boys!

10.

Serpent of old, ruler of the deep. Guardian of the bitter sea. Show us your glory. Show us your power! We pray of thee, we pray of thee. We invoke thee.
Serpent of old, ruler of the deep. Guardian of the bitter sea. Show us your glory. Show us your power! We pray of thee, we pray of thee. We invoke thee.

11.

Uhhh yeah, remember that conversation we had last week about my bloody vagina and the benefits of regularly trimming your fingernails?
Baby, remember that conversation we had last week about trimming your fingernails before fisting?

12.

Mmmmmm
I can’t believe the bank teller only gave us one lollipop. So rude.

13.

mmm next week let's wear our matching red panties
You know you really should consider going down a cup size, there’s lots of extra space in here

14.

TA-DA: SCISSORING!
SCISSORING MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

15.

Legitimately unclear why this photo has been tagged with "lesbian"
Legitimately unclear why this photo was among my “lesbian” search results

16.

Where's my motherfucking sandwich, ladies?
Where’s my sandwich?!

17.

You smell like my favorite flavor of Yankee Candle
It’s just that you smell like my favorite flavor of Yankee Candle

18.

All I need in this life she said is an exercise ball between me and my girlfriend, me and my girlfriend
All I need in this life of sin is an exercise ball between me and my girlfriend

19.

Okay fine you can borrow my shoes but you have to promise not to mess them up!
Okay fine you can borrow my shoes but you have to promise not to mess them up!

20.

WHO'S UP FOR PONY PLAY??!!!
WHO’S UP FOR PONY PLAY??!!!

21.

Uh huh that's right right there right on the tip of the chin ooo yeah that's it
Cassandra had been waiting all her life for a woman who would lick her chin, and now that it was really happening, she could barely remember to breathe

22.

caption
Is this sex? Are we sexing yet? Get the flowchart out again.

23.

Watching "Game of Thrones" in upward-facing dog lesbian sandwich pose is probably the best idea we've had since we bought these matching nude bodysuits from Frederick's
Watching “Game of Thrones” in upward-facing dog lesbian sandwich pose is probably the best idea we’ve had since we bought these matching nude bodysuits on the internet

24.

Uh babe you're smushing my nose
Uh babe you’re smushing my nose

Now it’s your turn, how would you caption this sucker?

caption
CAPTION THIS

SaveSave