The Comment Awards Are Wearing Discovery Flannel

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Hi mittens! Is it fall yet? Please?

This week, the straights were most definitely at it again.

Carrie for President 2032! I’m openly weeping at the pantsuit opportunities alone.

Riese gave us this important remembrance of Edith Windsor.

I’m just a seatbelt, standing in front of another seatbelt, asking her to love me: Crystal brought us some of the weirdest anti-equality ad campaigns from Australia’s fight for equal marriage laws.

This is powerful and perfect. And also NSFW.

In maybe the best news I’ve heard so far in 2017, Beyoncé has chosen Laverne Cox as a brand ambassador!

DEMI LOVATO MIGHT CURRENTLY HAVE A GAL PAL. Does Mey know about this? (Edit: She does.)

And then there were your comments!


On Straight People Watch: Summer 2K17 (and truly, this entire comment thread deserved awards, give yourselves a round of applause):

The If These Walls Could Talk Award to Sarah and Chandra:

somehow the gun family decals are the most surprising?! brb using lucy’s labia minora to apply my cheek stain To give your face that vulveteen glow

The Fabric of Our Lives Award to Rous Rose:

I love the Discovery Channel side of Autostraddle. Discovery flannel.

The Fresh Choice Award to Lisa, Hannah, and Snaelle:

Also do not use a vagina as a champagne flute. I *heard* it might lead to an emergency room visit and condescending looks from medical professionals.

And the $300,000 Pyramid Award to PaperoFlowers:

It took me a number of times to read that passage describing the “jealous bestman

On BREAKING: Demi Lovato Almost Maybe Possibly Has a Girlfriend Now:

The Cool For September Award to donnamartingraduates:

I do believe they waited until September to be seen in public to reassure us that they aren’t just cool for the summer but indeed plan to extend this glorious relationship across many seasons…

On Australia’s Anti-Same Sex Marriage Ads Ranked by Queerness:

The Clacking Game Award to Sam:

fruitlessly clacking against each other in sin

And the Life…Finds a Way Award to Kristana, love ain’t no billy goat, and Gilbert:

Kristana: Gif of Bill Paxton frantically tying his seatbelt together in the helicopter in Jurassic Park / love ain't no billy goat: life finds a way / Gilbert: Finally instructions for scissoring!

On Pop Culture Fix: Samira Wiley Is Out Here Gaying Up Women’s Magazines, Saving The World:

The Mummy Issues Award to Charlotte:

Listen I am so ready for Rachel Weisz to have a sex scene with a woman She is my root since I saw her in The Mummy and I have literally waited since 1999 for this very moment

On At Least No One Asked You to Fake a Straight Wedding With Your Lesbian Wife Today:

The Jenny’s Wedding Award to Vicky and Al:

Queer Girl: I mean, since more wedding weekend rom-coms will probably always be in Hollywood’s future, this could either be an amazing (or a terrible) queer version of Meet the Parents. / Cindy: As long as Ilene Chaiken doesn't write it. / Al: Someone dies on the wedding day, a bi character becomes biphobic, for some reason the POC character is play the wrong ethnicity(not even from the same continent), and fucking Jenny is directing the wedding.


See a funny or amazing comment that needs to be here? E-mail me at queergirlblogs [at] gmail [dot] com!

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Darcy

Darcy, a.k.a. Queer Girl, is your number one fan. They're a fat feminist from California who doodles hearts in the corners of their Gay Agenda. They're living through a pandemic, they're on Twitter, and they think you should drink more water! They also wanna make you laugh.

Darcy has written 376 articles for us.

36 Comments

  1. If you could be any super villian who would you be? Can from anywhere (comics, tv, movies, games ect.) as long as it’s a super villian. I’m torn between Mystique from X-Men and Purgatori from Purgatori.

    • Either Vicious from Cowboy Bebop because thats my biggest wish in life to be super tall, super cool, super good with a katana and super broody, this dude fills in all the criteria I want to be vicious :/
      Otherwise I’d just be poison ivy, misnadry and harley quinn once she gets rid of the joker baggage seems a pretty sweet deal

    • I am already the head of a major crime organization
      Just kidding.
      I would choose Voldemort or Magneto, go to an ATM and make it spit out all of the money and then hand it to needy people and to AS
      so in other words I would be a terrible villain.

    • No question: Catwoman. (All of her TV and screen incarnations rocked, with the exception of one from 2004 that does not, in fact, exist; but it’s Michelle Pfeiffer’s take I’d model myself after)

  2. Okay I kind of expecting an award this week, but I was expecting to get it for another comment(the like count was high). Color me surprised, queer, and delighted! Thank you!

  3. Me: *Finishes typing comments on Erin’s straight people article* *Shakes head at self and chuckles* That pun is totally lame.

    Queer girl: *Give me an award AND puts the aforementioned lame pun IN THE ACTUAL TITLE OF THE COMMENT AWARDS*

    Me:

  4. It pleases me very much to learn that no fewer than 20 people are on board with my 100% correct theory about the contextual clues re: Demi Lovato’s hand-holding!

    Thanks Queer Girl, and may their lovating bloom eternal.

  5. Wait – no one made that rainbow Trojan horse t-shirt or at least a .gif?

    Congrats winners, you posted some gold.

Comments are closed.