The Comment Awards Are Paws Up for Prancer

A small, brown and white dog peeking over their laptop screen, with a caption that says "Hey did you see that comment?!"

Hi sweet peas! Apparently I woke up this morning and chose chaos, because the Awards ended up reverse-chronological today. Bottoms up!

This week, Kayla taught us what lesbian pulp fiction cover we were!

The good people over on Tiktok are asking some important questions, namely: Is Vanessa Carlton’s A Thousand Miles about Sara Ramirez? Or possibly Rutina Wesley? 

Love! Is! Not! A! Lie!

This week’s You Need Help answered someone whose partners had told them they weren’t good in bed. Spoiler: that’s a partner problem!!

Heather reviewed Arlo the Alligator Boy, Netflix’s new cartoon starring Mary Lambert as a singing giantess! I am so excited!

On Red Table Talk this week, Willow Smith talked polyamory; Dani Janae and Shelli Nicole discussed the episode.

We love you, Prancer!

And finally, I Still Can’t Believe Anyone on “Battlestar Galactica” Was Straight. VERY CORRECT.

And then there were your comments!

On Twitter’s Favorite Lesbian-Loving Misandrist Chihuahua Has Been Adopted!

The Vapid Floof Award to Emilygoesoutside, speakpirate, and Kristana:

I would absolutely read a regular vapid fluff column that’s just queer folks adopting animals. Let me know about the lesbians and their cats, non-binary folks with their reptiles, trans women and birds, whatever! I am fully prepared to cry over some dykes adopting a goat or something.

And the Paws Up Award to Zuzu:

Hi Prancer nice to meet you I guess even though you are a dog. Please keep your distance. I want to inform you that you are very privileged to be an only pet, very privileged indeed, because would you like to know what happened to me? Would you? My moms moved in together and now I have to live with my evil stepbrothers and they are stupid butthead bully meanies (I’m not scared though) and I HATE THEM. I HATE THEM SO MUCH! I WILL YELL ABOUT IT FOR ALL OF ETERNITY!

On You Need Help: My Partner Says I’m Awkward in Bed:

The Here Here Award to Kt:

I jumped out of my seat and burst into applause at the end of this response! Thank you Kayla for your sage guidance. I hope it is impactful to the letter writer as it was to me <3

On When I Got COVID, My Wife and I Went Through It Together; How Will Things Change When She Returns to the Office?

The Socks-Car Children Awrad to likeaduck:

the socks-car children, is that anything? but seriously, I ship you guys and am so happy your relationship continues to thrive and grow despite your hardships.

On Gay TikTok Investigates: Is Vanessa Carlton’s “A Thousand Miles” About Sara Ramirez and/or Rutina Wesley?

The “Roommates” Award to Chloe:

No someone has to do White Houses, an extremely bisexual song about being in a love triangle with your college roommates. I wanna know if the roommates in question are also famous Juilliard alums!

On “To L and Back” Episode 607: Last Couple Standing with Willam Belli!

The Storytime Award to thatottergirl:

Before the season is over, I wanted to share my personal Butterfly Dress Effect theory: The costume designer and the lighting director were girlfriends, but in the first episode, they got into a huge argument about how best to light the giant butterfly on Bette’s dress. They got so mad at each other that they broke up, but neither person wanted to quit. Instead, the costume designer stripped the locations budget for extra ruffles, and the lighting director refused to let anyone’s whole face be visible indoors. And then Jenny killed them to restore the balance of the universe, but BY THEN IT WAS TOO LATE. The End

And on Quiz: Which Lesbian Pulp Book Cover Are You?

The Poached Eggs Award to Marissa H:

As a literal gay divorcee who got the price of salt, I feel that this quiz was constructed w absolute perfection. ty!

And the Drag Me to Hell Award to Loving My Result:

Does Girls Out of Hell describe me as a person navigating the world? No. Does Girls Out of Hell describe the women I read about or me who intrigue me, live in my head rent free, and continuously pull me in like a moth to flame? Hell yeah!

See a comment that needs to be here? Let me know! Tag me [at] queergirl.

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Darcy

Darcy, a.k.a. Queer Girl, is your number one fan. They're a fat feminist from California who doodles hearts in the corners of their Gay Agenda. They're living through a pandemic, they're on Twitter, and they think you should drink more water! They also wanna make you laugh.

Darcy has written 376 articles for us.

6 Comments

  2. Nice to get my due recognition around here, so much for “dogs” who I notice did not win any comment awards. *licks paws* I expect that I will be the star feature of the first upcoming Vapid Floof column, please be sure to have my trailer ready and stocked with plenty of catnip treats and raw chicken. Don’t call me I’ll have my people call your people

  3. Yaaay thank you for acknowledging/indulging my very reasonable, plausible L Word BTS theory!

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