BREAKING: Kristen Stewart Spotted Walking Next To Stella Maxwell, Ring The Alarm
The queer internet has been in a panic for the last day or two (or the last several months, depending on how you see it) regarding the nature of the relationship between one sullen actress Kristen Stewart and one Victoria’s Secret model Stella Maxwell. Romance rumors have swirled around the pair off and on for months, but they’ve also been visibly involved with other people for quite some time and to be fair, just because a pair of women are seen together it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re more than friends, right? Sometimes a pair of gals are actually just pals! Sometimes a lady needs queer community. But before we dismiss this story as mere speculation, let’s take a closer look at the timeline of these stories and see if we can’t paste together some semblance of an answer.
In May, shortly after splitting up with French actress/singer Soko, Kristen was spotted leaving a Met Gala afterparty with Stella. Tabloids claimed that Stewart and the “outdoorsy” model (previously linked to Miley Cyrus) had clearly hooked up, which even then was difficult to verify. Just a few weeks later, Stewart’s ex girlfriend Alicia Cargile appeared on the Cannes red carpet, politely holding Kristen’s sneakers – an iconic moment in Vapid Fluff’s brief history. The pair seemed to reconcile, and all was right in the world until late August, when the gossip mill announced that Cargile and Stewart were no more, and that Kristen had been seen about town with Cara Delevingne‘s recent ex, Annie Clark (are you still with me?)
In mid-October 2016, Kristen and musician Annie Clark were seen leaving the Bowery Hotel in Manhattan together, with Stella in tow. At the time, the press was very focused on the (still unconfirmed but like, pretty obvious) relationship between Annie and Kristen, and Stella just seemed like a friend along for the ride.
Now, things are much more confusing. Just a few days ago, Annie Clark confirmed that she had done the score for Come Swim, a short film directed by Stewart; the pair seemed to have settled into an easy, functional, mutually beneficial relationship. However, the pair were noticeably being photographed together much less, spurring rumors that they may have already split up. At the same time, photographers captured Stella visiting Kristen on the set for her new film, a historical piece centered around Lizzie Borden (filming in Savannah, GA for some reason).
Just some gals being pals
Looks a whole lot like the way famous women walk next to their girlfriends to me, but what the hell do I know? They’re not even holding coffee or dragging suitcases. According to Inquisitr, “Whoever Kristen may be dating now, it is clear that she won’t be looking at men anymore,” so there’s that.
As for Annie, well, she and Cara have been pretty friendly for exes, but they were spotted at a museum together yesterday… possibly holding hands? Body language expert Carolyn Yates agreed: these two are most likely still into each other.
https://twitter.com/celesbians/status/808945383564922880
We here at Vapid Fluff HQ will remain dedicated to this story and will keep you posted as details pour in. As far as we can tell, Kristen Stewart shall not rest until she has dated every queer woman in all of Hollywood (and we’re all for it).
https://twitter.com/KStewartBR/status/808466049775632388
Kristen Stewart Brakes For Zebras In Rolling Stones’ New Video for “Ride ‘Em On Down”
Hey, did you know the Rolling Stones are still a band who make records and release singles and make music videos? They sure are, and they’ll probably stay that way for another 50 years. They just put out a new record of blues covers called Blue & Lonesome, which comes out today (!) and to celebrate, they’ve also put out the video for their first single, a cover of Eddie Taylor’s “Ride ‘Em On Down.” It stars rebel without a cause and perennial Vapid Fluff fave Kristen Stewart, the sulky antiheroine of our dreams.
If you’ve ever dreamed of watching Kristen Stewart drive irresponsibly around Los Angeles, tossing caution and seatbelt laws to the wind, dancing suggestively at a gas station and licking a lollipop until her tongue is blue, you are about to see those dreams realized. If you’ve ever wanted to watch Kristen Stewart fishtail through what remains of the Los Angeles River and reflect sadly upon the California drought, you’re about to feel very satisfied (and also very concerned about the drought). Would you like to watch Kristen Stewart use some kind of surly Jedi mind tricks to deflect the attention of a muscular, bearded guy who pulls her over in a cop car for some reason? Boy, are you in for a good time. Also, there’s a zebra. You’re just going to have to trust me.
Is Kristen Stewart Sending Subtle Messages With Her Outfits?
Being famous sounds really hard. Having your personal life constantly photographed and dissected by the public seems like a lot of pressure, especially for a notoriously private person like the People’s Girlfriend, Kristen Stewart. Recently, Stewart caught a lot of flak for attending an event sharply dressed in a maroon blazer, calling to mind Annie Lennox or Brigitte Nielsen. Not everybody saw Stewart’s fashion sense that way; one eagle-eyed tabloid intern recognized her blazer as appearing strikingly similar to one worn by Stewart’s ex boyfriend Robert Pattinson at a Twilight premire about a million years ago. It’s no secret that fans have been waiting with bated breath for the Twilight actors to dump their current partners and reconcile, even though these two dated ages ago and both seem to have very much moved on with their lives. Conspiracy theories abound.
WHAT OTHER EVIDENCE DO YOU NEED?!?!?
Still, what if Kristen were sending Robert Pattinson a message with her blazer? What if every time you wore an outfit, it was widely interpreted as a secret message to your ex from five years ago? I couldn’t help but wonder — what other secret messages was Kristen sending with her ensembles? And to whom?
I learned very quickly that Kristen has been practicing the secret art of communication through fashion for many, many years. Here at the premiere of Remember Me starring ex-boyfriend Robert Pattinson, Stewart gives Rob a subtle hint as to exactly how gay she is by silently pleading with Tegan and Sara to come and save her from this movie
Now that she’s dating famous guitarist Annie Clark, Kristen has to step up her rock star game. She expertly used this outfit to send a secret message to Angus Young of AC/DC. The DC stands for Delevingne, Cara. This is no coincidence.
Kristen Stewart is on her way to steal your girl and there is nothing you can do to stop her. In a subtle homage to the flash-in-the-pan pirate trend of 1993, Stewart evokes Jerry Seinfeld‘s infamous puffy shirt on the red carpet for Billy Lynn’s Long Halftime Walk.
(left image via JustJared)
Over time, Kristen has transformed from awkward vampire girlfriend to grouchy Hollywood hipster girlfriend — a Samantha Ronson for the 2010s some might say. For a walk through her favorite hangout (and Sam’s too!), LAX, Kristen chose this low-key casual look that screams “I’m her roommate! We’re best friends! That’s why I’m walking three feet ahead of her.”
Even though she’s busy being glamorous on the red carpet, Kristen still sends a secret message to this egret that she just can’t stop thinking about him.
OK Fine: Are Kristen Stewart And Annie Clark Dating Now Or What?
Look, I don’t like this any more than you do.
In last week’s No Filter, we posited the (semi-substantiated) theory that Carrie Brownstein and Abbi Jacobson were dating one another – a theory widely noted across the internet, because by generally accepted standards, there is no tangible proof. Carrie and Abbi have not explicitly acknowledged the nature of their relationship in a way that we generally expect celebrities to. They have not made a statement or been photographed walking hand-in-hand through the Gelson’s spaghetti sauce aisle. We here at Vapid Fluff HQ stand by our declaration because of corroboration from trustworthy sources in Portland, but without social media confirmation it’s difficult to definitively prove such things to the world at large. So how do we know when a pair of celebrities are dating? How can we be sure that two women walking next to each other on the street are girlfriends or gal pals or just walking into the same coffee shop at the same time?
This leads us to the conundrum of the hour: Kristen Stewart and Annie Clark.
Here’s what we know:
It seems that the once-lauded relationship between “tangle of kinetic limbs” Cara Delevingne and ethereal beam of unwavering light Annie Clark has come to an end. This particular pairing frankly never made much sense to us, but they’d been very open about how in love they were and seemed very happy. Since then, Delevingne has been partying with Amber Heard, cavorting with tigers and FaceTiming with Taylor Swift. As for Annie, well… Every time she’s appeared in the tabloids lately, it’s been with everybody’s favorite sourpuss, Kristen Stewart.
I don’t want this to be true, OK? I keep thinking about Alicia Cargile holding Kristen’s shoes on the Cannes red carpet, or the notoriously guarded Kristen gushing about Alicia to reporters for the very first time, or the serene pouts on both their faces when they march back to the car after getting lattes in Los Feliz. I think about Alicia’s sweet, despondent tweets during the couple’s separation earlier this year, and how genuinely content they’d seemed after their reconciliation. I don’t often get emotionally invested in the comings and goings of celebrity relationships, but I was really rooting for these two. As of this moment, it’s been weeks since Stewart and Cargile were photographed together at any of their predictable haunts. This doesn’t always mean anything, especially considering how notoriously private the pair are. Still.
I’ve denied whatever is going on here for as long as I possibly could. Guys, I think something is going on between Kristen and Annie. In early September, the pair were spotted eating a meal and attending an improv show together, which seemed innocent enough. Since then, as it’s become much more obvious that Cara and Annie’s relationship is over, Annie’s been seen with Stewart quite a bit more. Here they are strolling down St Marks Place in New York this past week, probably on their way to purchase a bong and some FroYo:
photo via “Mr Snappy,” apparently
Tabloids were quick to point out the similar outfits Clark and Stewart are wearing, and if that’s an indicator of these two dating, my friends and I have a lot to answer for. However, tongues began to wag – are these guys together, or just suddenly really good friends? What happened to Cara and Alicia? Maybe Alicia and Kristen have an open thing? Maybe St. Vincent was always one of Kristen’s Five? Annie later appeared with Stewart at the premiere of her film Certain Women.
Saturday night, Los Angeles-based comedian Liza Dye met the pair backstage at a gig, and the pair were spotted apparently leaving the venue together, looking pretty cozy.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BLWOUyqhcsl/?taken-by=lizadye
I didn’t want to believe it. I still don’t want to believe it. And yet, here we are. Sources on the ground in LA have been unable to present Vapid Fluff HQ with a definitive answer either way, but the mounting evidence is difficult to deny. Oh No They Didn’t has put together a comprehensive guide to Kristen’s [alleged] history of [allegedly] cheating on her previous partners. From here on out, all we can do is remain vigilant and wait for a sign from the heavens.
Kristen Stewart Tells The New York Times About “Harnessing A Fluid,” If Ya Know What I Mean
feature image via Karim Sadli for The New York Times.
In this month’s edition of T: The New York Times Style Magazine, center of my actual beating heart Kristen Stewart talks about her struggles with anxiety, her love for her girlfriend, her appreciation for the craft of acting and most importantly, the fact that she has been hiding a private Instagram account from me THIS ENTIRE TIME. Kristen, I thought we were friends.
Writer Nicholas Haramis notes several times how open and comfortable Stewart appears, how markedly at ease and different she seems from her pouty, perpetually miserable public persona. Her Los Feliz home sounds pretty much exactly how one would imagine – stocked with mementos from her films, fashion and photography books, a Playboy pinball machine, some metal letters spelling out the word ASS, Kerouac, Dostoevsky and Kafka novels, and oh – a garage full of paintings inspired by her poetry, which will later be turned into artistic short films. Of one painting, she explains, “It’s basically about that moment when you wake up and you get dressed and you realize, ‘I’m not sad anymore. I’m not saturated anymore. I’ve been dropped back into everyone else’s reality and now I can live again.'” She sheepishly tells Haramis, “Yeah, I mean, I’m not, like, good. It just feels nice to apply paint to something.”
My personal favorite part of the article is where Kristen mysteriously leads Haramis into her garage, described here as “the most intimate room of the house.” I imagine it went something like this:
Stewart has seemed much more at-ease in recent interviews, reportedly due to her happiness with her adorable partner Alicia Cargile. In this interview, she giddily shows Haramis pictures of the pair in her private Instagram account and gushes about how cute Cargile is. Kristen Stewart could have been headlining No Filter THIS WHOLE TIME and I feel very personally betrayed, but whatever Kristen.
As for Twilight truthers insisting that Stewart must just be biding time before she can reunite with former costar and distant ex Robert Pattinson, Stewart explains, “People wanted me and Rob to be together so badly that our relationship was made into a product. It wasn’t real life anymore. And that was gross to me. It’s not that I want to hide who I am or hide anything I’m doing in my life. It’s that I don’t want to become a part of a story for entertainment value.”
Our Lady of Perpetual Resting Bitch Face seems increasingly driven to seek out challenging roles and expand her repertoire as an actress, describing acting at different times as “an explorative, meditative, moving, beautiful, transcendent experience that brings us all closer,” “tapping into a magic world,” “finding a portal” and my personal favorite, “harnessing a fluid.” She admits to having struggled with the balance between exposing herself as an actress in her roles and exposing herself as a heavily scrutinized public figure. “How do you feel like you’re not being stolen from, yet at the same time not guard yourself to the point of depriving yourself of so much goodness in life?” she asks. Stewart describes having found a certain level of resiliency and indestructible energy within herself, and seems much less ruled by the anxiety and insecurity which made much of her earlier experience with fame so uncomfortable.
“I’m not the typical showman,” she tells Haramis, “but at the same time, I want so badly to expose myself. I want to be understood and I want to be seen, and I want to do that in the rawest, purest, most naked way I can.”
If Kristen Stewart ever puts out a book of poetry a la A Night Without Armor, I will preorder it the second it becomes available. In the meantime, she is currently starring in Cafe Society, a film by a terrible person that I am not going to see.
BREAKING: At Last, Kristen Stewart Calls Alicia Cargile Her “Girlfriend” In a Major Magazine, Which Is Like “Gal Pal” But Different
In this month’s Elle Magazine, Our Lady Of Perpetual Resting Bitch Face Kristen Stewart wears some very pretty clothes, stares miserably into space and speaks glowingly of her relationship with her very cute girlfriend, visual effects producer and dapper blazer enthusiast Alicia Cargile. While Kristen has spoken about living openly in the past, and has referred to her sexuality in broad terms, this is the first time she’s used the word “girlfriend” publicly or even really acknowledged a relationship of hers as it was happening (save for that beautiful poetry she wrote for Robert Pattinson back in 2014).
Of Cargile, she says, “I think also right now I’m just really in love with my girlfriend. We’ve broken up a couple of times and gotten back together, and this time I was like, ‘Finally, I can feel again.'”
Ever since we first spotted Kristen Stewart cavorting sullenly on the beach with her Very Good Friend Alicia, we here at Vapid Fluff HQ have been smitten. As the Twilight star has navigated invasive paparazzi and tabloid headlines accusing her of unspeakable nonsense, we’ve had mixed feelings about covering her, because it’s been very obvious that Stewart was very uncomfortable with the attention. For a while, she and Alicia were inseparable, strolling down Los Angeles streets, grabbing coffee, walking with coffee, drinking coffee, walking away from coffee. The tabloids called them roommates, gal pals, best friends — anything but girlfriends, which they very clearly were. Then, as soon as we’d finally become attached to their relationship, it was over. Stewart wandered around LAX terminals alone, Patsy Cline echoing mournfully in her earbuds, batting her impossibly long eyelashes at no one in particular. She dated another famous person, this time very publicly, and when it fizzled out we were delighted to see her seemingly reconcile with Cargile in social situations. Before long, Alicia was walking red carpets in Cannes with her gal pal, holding her comfortable sneakers for afterparties, and escorting Stewart to and from Japanese restaurants. It was truly the glamorous tabloid romance that the queer public had always dreamed of, and finally deserved.
Stewart confides to Elle that part of her reluctance to discuss her personal life had to do with the way her relationship with former costar Robert Pattinson had been sensationalized in the press. “When I was dating a guy I was hiding everything that I did because everything personal felt like it was immediately trivialized, so I didn’t like it. We were turned into these characters and placed into this ridiculous comic book, and I was like, ‘That’s mine. You’re making my relationship something that it’s not.’ I didn’t like that,” she explains. “But then it changed when I started dating a girl. I was like, ‘Actually, to hide this provides the implication that I’m not down with it or I’m ashamed of it, so I had to alter how I approached being in public. It opened my life up and I’m so much happier.”
Let’s all take turns guessing Kristen’s favorite Pretenders song! Gonna go out on a limb and assume it’s not “Talk of the Town.”
This particular issue of Elle also features queer icons Hari Nef, Amandla Stenberg and Zayn Malik. Kristen Stewart is currently promoting Equals, a movie costarring Nicholas Hoult that none of us have seen because we are all very busy seeing Ghostbusters ten thousand times, and also a movie with inexcusable human being Woody Allen that we are not going to talk about. Now that Kristen is finally comfortable being visible as a famous person who is not straight, we are really excited to see what her future holds.
Alicia Cargile’s most recent project has been this awkward hug, issued on a Los Feliz street while walking Kristen back to the car following a refreshing sushi lunch.
BREAKING: Alicia Cargile Accompanies Kristen Stewart On Cannes Red Carpet, Carries Her Shoes
feature image via WireImage
Tongues wagged two weeks ago when our good friend and definitely 100% avid fan of Autostraddle Kristen Stewart (who I am pretty sure has never heard of this website) was spotted cavorting around West Hollywood with her ex girlfriend Alicia Cargile. Her short but intense romance with singer/actress/Snapchat enthusiast Soko had recently fizzled, and Alicia had stopped posting wistful tweets, and things were looking up.
Imagine our surprise when Kristen Stewart stopped by a special screening of Riley Keough (Elvis Presley’s granddaughter, Marie Currie from The Runaways)’s new film American Honey with a special guest on her arm – Alicia.
I thought Alicia forgot to take her purse out of the packaging but OMG she’s carrying Kristen’s comfortable shoes for later, which is just SO GAY. Image via WireImage
The notoriously private Stewart recently did a very candid interview with Variety, wherein she explained her lack of interest in justifying her relationships to the press. She admitted that she has kept her relationships relatively transparent for the sake of queer kids who might need to see that kind of visibility, but has no interest in discussing her private life publicly. She also said a bunch of troubling things about how it was OK for her to work with notorious creep Woody Allen because she doesn’t actually know any of the people involved, but I cannot emotionally deal with that right now so let’s get back to the topic at hand.
Kristen (who is going through a very cool long black skirt phase) carried a Chanel bag and looked serene and happy (for Kristen Stewart, this is saying a lot). Alicia appeared to have dashed into the Cool LA Girlfriend Store on Melrose, where she picked up this blazer she’s worn around Kristen before. They held hands and smiled. I can’t believe once upon a time I thought I’d be a writer and now this is what I do with my time.
Soko’s been at Cannes for a couple of days already and was seen walking a different red carpet with Lily-Rose Depp, her co-star in The Dancer. She was described in just about every publication this reporter encountered as “Kristen Stewart’s ex,” which might be all she needs to promote this movie. Following Kristen and Alicia’s resplendent red carpet walk, she was also seen looking sad in suspenders and a Mickey Mouse hat.
Pop Culture Fix: Kristen Stewart’s Favorite Words are “Dude” and “F-ck”
Oo-de-lally, oo-de-lally, golly, what a week. In case you missed it, Orange Is the New Black‘s season four trailer is intense as heck and Deadpool‘s Brianna Hildebrand has a girlfriend. Below is the rest of the queer pop culture news you need in your life today.
Celebrity Profiles
There’s nothing I love more than a good celebrity profile. (Caity Weaver’s GQ profile of Justin Bieber is hands down the best one I’ve read in 2016.) This week, we’ve got two queer gems: Variety talked to Kristen Stewart (which Stef mentioned in No Filter, but I want to talk about even more) and NoTofu talked to Sarah Paulson (it was “raw and real”).
Here are the top ten things from each profile.
Kristen Stewart
+ Her favorite words are “dude” and “fuck.”
+ She drinks champagne over ice like some kind of Liz Lemon while contemplating her life and the mysteries of the universe.
+ She thinks the Twilight sequels are “a little splattered against the wall.”
+ She doesn’t “fucking know” what Chris Hemsworth was thinking making that Snow White and the Huntsmen origin story.
+ She knows she has a sort of “heavy energy.”
+ “I’m not hiding shit,” she says. “And I’m very obviously …” She leaves the last word of that sentence in ellipses.
+ She doesn’t want to label her sexuality because it’s very easy for her to be cool with being with women and she doesn’t want that easiness to make kids who are struggling with their sexuality feel bad? Or something.
+ She wants to be part of the LGBT movement without using the word “gay.”
+ She let the paparazzi follow her with her girlfriends because she wanted kids to see her kissing another girl and feel okay doing it too.
+ She idolizes Jodie Foster.
Sarah Paulson
+ She “talks fast, laughs easily, and she thinks about things deeply.”
+ She didn’t mean to out herself, she just really wanted to kiss her girlfriend, Cherry Jones, when she won that Tony Award.
+ “What am I gonna do, pat her on the back and say ‘good job, dude?”
+ She knows one of the reasons you were so happy when she started dating women is because you thought she’d be alone forever with 500 cats.
+ She thinks everyone should be able to love “whomever you fucking well please.”
+ She doesn’t know how Marcia Clark did it either, tbh.
+ Every time she has auditioned for a leading role with brunette hair, they ask her to dye it blonde.
+ She only knew OJ Simpson from the Naked Gun movies(!!!) (before his trial).
+ John Travolta did the dances from Grease and Pulp Fiction for her, on command, on the set of The People vs. OJ Simpson.
Teevee
+ Are you watching Samantha Bee’s new talkshow, Full Frontal? You should be. It’s very good. This week she dragged Harriet Tubman haters and tackled anti-abortion centers. Emily Nussbaum also wrote a great review of the show in this week’s The New Yorker.
+ Hello, Golden Girls Funko figures are here. (Thanks for the heads up, Nic!)
+ Scream (and gaymo Audrey) will be back for a second season starting May 30 on MTV. The trailer is finally her. (It’s gross!)
Movies
+ What we have here is an adaptation of Sarah Waters’ Fingersmith.
Wait, what?
I think Sophie Turner and Jennifer Lawrence are practicing fisting together?
Kristen Stewart Had A Very Gay 24 Hours
Guys, what is even happening with Kristen Stewart?!?!
Yesterday, celebrated actress, director and clandestine glove lunch enthusiast Jodie Foster was awarded a star on the legendary Hollywood Walk of Fame, and her former Panic Room costar Kristen Stewart was there to cheer her on. She even made a speech celebrating her mentor, who also started her career as a child actress and went on to pursue more serious projects.
“Of all the examples that I could have had at such an impressionable age, there’s nothing self-serving about her,” Stewart said. “She cares about people, she is quite the opposite of the type of person that is gravitated towards being an actress… She’s always encompassed what I thought was sort of the prime example of where you want to be and she’s been there for me.. She’s a baller on every level. It’s out of control. She did everything young. She kicked Yale’s ass. She won Oscars. She became a filmmaker herself. She created a family and still is just normal and cool and kind.”
At press time, Jodie Foster doppelganger and queer enthusiast Taylor Hatmaker could not be reached for comment. (image via Valerie Macon/AFP/Getty)
Kristen also super-casually mentioned that Jodie hired a mariachi band to play at her 11th birthday, which is a dream I did not know I even had.
Later, photos surfaced on Twitter of Stewart attending what appears to be a friend’s birthday party.. with someone who is almost definitely her beanied ex girlfriend Alicia Cargile.. at what could theoretically be the patio of the Abbey in West Hollywood on ladies’ night (maybe?). Some kind of bar patio filled with a gaggle of Los Angeles gay ladies. Some kind of very gay tree.
UMMMM?!
Rumored ex-girlfriend Soko is currently in Cannes, Snapchatting herself partying with friends. Ms. Stewart was spotted leaving the Met Gala earlier this week with Miley Cyrus’ ex girlfriend Stella Maxwell. It seems that Kristen appears to be living in some kind of lesbian Los Angeles dreamscape. Do you recognize this tree? Who are these people? What even is reality anymore?
The top of the photo says “BIRTHDAY BASH,” don’t ask me how I figured that out cos I don’t know either.
Kristen Stewart Spotted Walking Alone; Stop the Presses
It’s been an odd couple of months for Kristen Stewart. First, she quietly broke up with live-in gal pal Alicia Cargile in a move so subtle it took the tabloids months to actually notice. Shortly thereafter, she started dating Soko, a musician and actress who has been very open about their relationship in interviews and on social media — much moreso than Kristen.
For a couple of days, the paparazzi were obsessed with everything they did, be it holding hands on the streets of Paris or sucking one another’s thumbs in the parking lot of a sandwich shop in Los Angeles. Since then, reports of the pair’s daily exploits have mostly dried up, but the tabloids have not stopped crafting stories from what limited information we already have. According to several reports, Stewart was seen by herself somewhere in Beverly Hills, which multiple gossip websites took as proof that Stewart and Soko have already called it quits. Some took it even further and claimed that Robert Pattinson was getting ready to/had already left FKA Twigs, and that the Twilight stars intended to rekindle their romance. Again, this all happened because Kristen Stewart was spotted walking somewhere by herself. Being famous is wild.
In this month’s edition of French Marie Claire, alleged sapphist and Broody McBrooderson Kristen Stewart discussed her extremely busy and extraordinarily productive year and her experiences with the pressures of fame. Although the translation is a bit confusing, it’s clear that Kristen continues to abhor the paparazzi and tabloid journalism in general (sorry, Kristen). When asked if there’s anywhere she can go on Earth where she wouldn’t be recognized, she reluctantly admits, “Fuck no.” Public scrutiny has led to Stewart becoming a bit paranoid, constantly worrying whether or not someone is eavesdropping on her private conversations.
While she was happy to tell the reporter that her favorite thing about acting was the ability to connect with others, she also said that she hates talking about fame — “There’s not much to say about it, and no one wants to hear you whine about your job, especially when so many people aspire to become actors.” Mostly, the journalist seemed to focus on Kristen’s recent shorter haircut, and whether or not she was still capable of “expressing femininity.” Additionally, when the reporter asked Stewart if it was harder in Hollywood to be black, gay or a woman, she replied, “I don’t have much experience with these subjects, I don’t have much to say.” There are certainly worse ways to answer that question, although also arguably there are better.
Anyway, here we are again, gossiping about how much Kristen Stewart hates being gossiped about. As far as we know, she still has a girlfriend and they’re still getting weird all over LA. We can’t wait to see what those two crazy kids get into next.
Kristen Stewart And Soko: A Romance For The Ages
feature image via FameFlynet Pictures
Unless you’ve been living under a rock (or filling your days with your own normal social life), you must know that Our Lady Of Perpetual Bitchface Kristen Stewart has been seen canoodling on at least two continents with French musician Stephanie Sokolinski, known to many as Soko. I haven’t been this excited about a celebrity pairing since… well, Kristen and her last girlfriend, but this relationship is extra special because it’s very clear that Ms. Stewart no longer gives a single fuck. Every day, gossip blogs are filled with images of Soko and Kristen wandering the streets of Paris or Los Angeles, looking effortlessly cool in dark sunglasses and outfits that make no sense, holding hands and looking goddamn affectionate.
Photo credit: Paul Hubble/GC Images
So what’s up with these two? What do we know? Let’s dive in.
The press has been going crazy over Kristen and Soko this week (something Kristen outwardly hates, sorry Kristen, I don’t know why I’m like this), and somebody’s intern did a lot of digging through the archives of the internet and found this interview from a year ago, in which Soko discusses moving to LA on a lark. She was inspired to do so by a dream, and although it happened very quickly and without much prior organization, things obviously worked out — she figured out a ride from the airport and friends pretty quickly, and even went on a blind date her first evening. That date? Robert Pattinson.
Yup, you read that right. Prior to dating Bella Swan, Soko went out with her ex, professional sparklevamp Edward Cullen. Guys, this is so gay.
It doesn’t sound like the date went anywhere, and Robert is currently engaged to FKA twigs, but that conversation must have been amazingly awkward. Still, we’ve all dated each others’ exes at one point or another; it’s why Alice Pieszecki’s Chart exists. Truth be told, if you draw up your own chart you are probably connected to Kristen Stewart by six degrees or less.
On Monday, W Magazine posted an interview with Soko about a zine she’s put together consisting of sexy DMs she’s received; she even copped to having gone on dates with a couple of girls who’d hit on her via social media. When asked about her sexuality, she explains, “I’ve always been open with my sexuality, meaning I don’t really care about gender… Sex for so long was such a taboo thing. You couldn’t be free with your sexuality and say that you like it. But it’s one of the biggest joys of life. If you find one partner who you love having sex with, it’s the best! This new generation is a lot more liquid with sexuality and it’s really refreshing.”
https://www.instagram.com/p/BA1Waegwcdg/
When asked how someone should go about asking Soko on a date via DM, she noted that “I’m very, very, very in love and very happy in a relationship, so I don’t have that urge.” When the interviewer namechecked Kristen and asked if the couple had met via social media, Soko laughed and explained that they had met in real life. It’s the first actual confirmation we’ve gotten from either party that their relationship actually exists.
Later, the pair were photographed in the parking lot of the Hollywood Locali (a vegan-ish panini restaurant), waiting for their takeout. Totally normal LA couple thing to do. Kristen curled up casually in the driver’s side of the vehicle, lounging with the windows down. Soko stood next to the car, sucking Kristen’s thumb through the window. Typical couple stuff. The image of these two lovebirds is so pure and serene, it might as well be a Caravaggio painting.
Although Kristen has made it clear that she’s very uncomfortable having her personal life dissected by the press, it’s inspiring (and important!) to see a very public figure living her life increasingly openly. The most important thing is that both Kristen and Soko seem really, really happy.
What will these two get into next? Will they go on a Disneyland date and look sullen and over it on Splash Mountain? Will they make out in the Del Taco drive thru line? I actually cannot wait to find out.
No Filter: I’ve Been Thinking About Kristen Stewart And Soko All Week Long
feature image via Splash
Hello and welcome to yet another edition of No Filter, in which we all sit and discuss the most important celebrity happenings of the past week. I’m sure you guys all had fulfilling weeks in your actual lives, but I spent my entire week glued to terrible UK tabloids in hopes of gleaning some new information about the relationship between Kristen Stewart and Soko. Mostly I learned about Soko’s talent for matching polka dots and stripes in her outfits, while Kristen continued her trend of “casual, laid back” outerwear. The Daily Mail and the Mirror told me they held hands a lot. I won’t repost those images because I’m terrified of getting eaten by a dinosaur/served a cease and desist letter, but trust me: Kristen looked hot in a leather jacket this week and held hands with her girlfriend a whole lot. An anonymous (imaginary) source recently told Heat Magazine: “She likes the idea of dating a non-American again, and Stephanie is very avant-garde and different.” Okay!
They spent the week playing a friendly game of frisbee all over Paris, and have now moved their budding romance to the City of Angels. This is how I know that:
https://twitter.com/KaylaGildore/status/711705932514758656?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
Alicia Cargile “took to Twitter” (a thing famous people do sometimes) to post stuff like this for a day or two, and then stopped:
https://twitter.com/polaroidproject/status/707322278258737152
?
Let’s move on to those images shared willingly by the public!
Kristen took this picture though, and you get three guesses how I know that.
Here’s a bonus round photo of Soko from LA:
https://www.instagram.com/p/BDPBCRVQcdT/
And in case you were wondering.
Did anybody else do anything on Instagram this week? Oh yes:
This is what your girlfriend Lena Waithe looked like when she took you out for a chill night out.
Vin Diesel bought Ruby Rose a bike, and Ruby Rose clearly has no earthly idea how to ride a bike. I knew I was going to adore this friendship.
Cara Delevingne and Dita Von Teese. Just thought you’d like to know.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BDSMOcTGFWp/
Tegan and Sara’s cats look really anxious about the fact that they clearly don’t know how to read.
I have watched this like 17 times and laughed every single time.
Jasika Nicole taught OUR OWN CHELSEY PETTY how to do this thing I don’t understand!
YO NICE TRY, MICKEY MOUSE.
Join us next week, when Kristen and Soko will probably go to Disneyland and have a mad time on the teacups.
No Filter: Kristen Stewart’s New Girl Friend Is Whispering Secrets Into Her Mouth
Welcome back to No Filter, a column with its finger on the pulse and its tongue in its cheek and probably a lot of other places. This week, a lot’s going on — everybody’s dating or presumably not dating everybody else and I’m all up in their business like a nosy Jewish grandmother. We at Vapid Fluff HQ work tirelessly to provide you with the queerest in supermarket tabloid journalism, mostly via Instagram.
This week in celebrities having relationships a lot more fulfilling than mine, here’s Sarah Paulson admiring Holland Taylor admiring a painting:
When captions fail… @HollandTaylor #AnnRichardsisBoss #Annatthezach pic.twitter.com/fOWDJe59nU
— Sarah Paulson (@MsSarahPaulson) March 14, 2016
Hey, do you guys know about Soko? Her record “My Dreams Dictate My Reality” was one of my favorites of the past year. Anyway, she was recently spotted being really adorable with Kristen Stewart in Paris, and you know what that means — these two are FRIENDS. VERY GOOD FRIENDS. Look at Soko whispering all her secrets into Kristen’s mouth! Look at these goddamn flowers she greeted Kristen with at the airport! If Kristen threw a party and invited everyone she knew, the biggest gift would for sure be from Soko.
The most impressive thing about Lauren and Samira’s picnic is that it appears that Duncan the dachshund has solved a Rubik’s cube all by himself. He can’t even see colors! Way to go, little dude.
Here’s one of the few pictures on Queen Latifah’s instagram that isn’t a promo shot for her new movie. I guess this is too. Whatever, the point is: we’re covering Queen Latifah now. She isn’t dating Paula Patton.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BCe14FYrJSF/
Leisha Hailey is taking hip-hop dance classes now? Leisha Hailey is taking hip-hop dance classes now.
Laura Jane Grace’s guitar stares out the window pensively.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BCyQ4XrJqMN/
Damn, Danielle – back at it again with the white vaaaans.
Ingrid Nilsen caught you this fish with her bare hands.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BCvk_urwqXh/
Kreayshawn is an actual cartoon. You oughta see her paintings of tunnels.
Join us next week, when hopefully we’ll know a lot more about the nature of this blossoming friendship between Kristen Stewart and Soko.
22 Women Who Came Out Or Got Girlfriends In 2015
Another year, another batch of newly-minted queers helping the world gradually understand that it’s only a matter of time before everybody is gay. That’s right: everybody.
This year’s coming out stories happened with much less fanfare than in years past, and a majority of the people on this list didn’t even make an official coming out statement, they just casually entered into a public same-sex relationship and waited for the world to notice. We’ve also finally gotten to a place in Hollywood, at least, where calling a spade a spade (e.g., acknowledging a same-sex relationship exists just as easily as we would an opposite-sex relationship) isn’t considered defamatory enough to warrant outrage.
Oddly, some of this year’s biggest coming out stories came from people who the community-at-large has very mixed feelings about — a pop star with a rocky history of racial appropriation and disregard, a reality TV star who rose to fame by placing her infant daughter in child beauty pageants, and a transgender woman who endorses a political party that advocates against her community’s best interests (amongst other sins).
Without any further ado, here are the 21 women and one gender-fluid person who came out in 2015!
January
Stephanie Allynne, Actress / Comedian
Allyne identified as straight when she met Tig Notaro on the set of In a World. But as they described in the documentary Tig, which came out in July, what developed between them transcended Allynne’s prior conception of her own sexual orientation. Although their relationship wasn’t a secret, it became common knowledge on January 1st, when Notaro announced that the pair had been engaged for 53 minutes and so far, it was going very well. Allyne is a member of the Los Angeles Upright Citizens Brigade and an experienced comedian who has appeared on shows including Comedy Bang Bang, 2 Broke Girls, The Mindy Project, Key & Peele, Maron, and Kroll Show.
February
Patricia Velásquez, Actress / Model
Although rumors about supermodel and actress Patricia Velásquez had been swirling since her relationship with Sandra Bernhard in the early ’90s, the woman considered by many to be “the first Latina supermodel” made it official in February with the release of her memoir, Straight Walk.
Ali Liebert, Actress
She made you swoon playing gay babe Betty McRae in Bomb Girls, and then she made you swoon playing another gay babe in Lost Girl… and THEN she made you swoon again this year when she went public with her relationship with her girlfriend Charlie. Interestingly, she also appeared briefly in The L Word, as did the aforementioned Patricia Velásquez.
Halsey, Musician
Halsey photographed on Aug. 2, 2015 at Grant Park in Chicago // Lucy Hewett // via Billboard
This past February, Ashley Nicolette Frangipane, known as “Halsey” to her fans, identified herself as a mixed race bisexual woman on Twitter. Frangipane has also been open about her diagnosis of bipolar disorder, describing herself in an interview with Billboard magazine as an “unconventional child” and an “inconvenient woman.”
April
Ruby Tandoh, Chef
Ruby Tandoh made it to the final round of The Great British Bake-Off, writes about food for The Guardian and, in April, came out as a very funny gay lady.
Angel McCoughtry, WNBA Player
Atlanta Dream hoopster McCoughtry came out on Instagram, sharing a photograph of herself and her fiancée, declaring, “I understand we all judge and its in human nature, but the more i speak to God i never feel judgement front he man upstairs, even tho he has all the power too! He tells me to fall, learn, and grow because thats life. But to always keep my heart pure and believe totally in him. All i know love is a great feeling and GOD is Love.”
Kendra Fisher, Hockey Player
Fisher, an elite ice hockey goalie for Canada, was already out in her private life, but spoke openly about her lesbian identity for the first time at the Canadian Olympic Committee’s #OneTeam round table. “There’s this assumption that it’s not necessary for women in sports in particular to come out publicly,” she said. “It’s failing to understand the importance of having the conversation and being in that place. I came through in a generation when the transition of being gay was just supposed to happen quietly. I started a relationship with a woman and it just wasn’t talked about. Only in having conversations with people have I realized the need for me to talk about this.”
Faustina “Fuzzy” Allogey, TV Personality
Fuzzy Agolley, an Australian TV personality who co-hosts The Voice Australia and co-hosted Video Hits for five years, came out on her blog in celebration of her 31st birthday. “As black as my skin, as Chinese as my blood, and as Australian and British are my nationalities, I’m also a proud Gay Woman,” she wrote. “Most importantly though, I’m a happy human being.”
Pumpkin & Mama June, Reality TV Stars
Pumpkin and her mother, Mama June, of the TV show Here Comes Honey Boo-Boo, came out as bisexual on Inside Edition this past April.
Caitlyn Jenner, Athlete & TV Personality
via Vanity Fair
This was the big coming out story of 2015 — the Olympic hero, lifelong Republican, reality television star and lapsed member of the Kardashian clan came out as transgender on Diane Sawyer after decades of speculation.
May
Ursula Halligan, Journalist
As the vote on marriage equality in Ireland drew closer, 55-year-old prominent broadcast journalist Ursula Halligan came out publicly in an op-ed. She called on religious communities to support the measure and shed light on how homophobia had impacted her.
Miley Cyrus, Musician
Although the headline of this article indicates that this is a list of “women,” Miley Cyrus does not identify as a woman; she identifies as gender-fluid.
In a series of interviews and announcements beginning in May 2015, problematic pop star Miley Cyrus came out as pansexual and genderfluid, and revealed that she’d come out to her mother as bisexual at the age of 14. She recalled being the go-to hookup for other “sexually curious” girls as a teenager and having prior relationships with women. Although she’s lately been more interested in relationships with women or non-binary folks, she told TIME Magazine that “If I end up in a straight relationship, that’s fine — but I’m not going to be with f—ing slob guys who are watching porn, making all their girls feel ugly.”
Tatum O’Neal, Actress
Tatum O’Neal, the youngest actress to ever win an Academy Award (in 1974, for Paper Moon), told People magazine that she’s loving the ladies these days, saying that “I like women. I definitely have been dating mostly women recently.” Regarding her sexuality, O’Neal says, “I’m not one or the other.” Since that time, rumors have swirled regarding her alleged relationship with lesbian pioneer Rosie O’Donnell.
Rosie Perez, Actress
In a speech for the Trevor Project Live in June, Rosie Perez revealed that she had a lesbian relationship in junior high school, which makes her luckier than most of us. “All I wanted to do was hump her. And I suppressed the urge and suppressed the urge and suppressed the urge until Michelle one day started humping on me.” Perez says she is not “lesbian, gay or whatever” but rather “quasi-straight,” and that she wishes she’d had somebody to talk to during her relationship with Michelle: “If I had other people, specifically adults, if I was just able to call up and they said, ‘Oh, I humped the Michelle-type person, too. You’re normal, don’t worry.”
Danielle Brooks, Actress
The Julliard graduate and Orange is the New Black star was open about her relationship with filmmaker Nneka Onuorah, which ended mid-year. Does she like girls forever? Will she date another girl? Will that girl be you? Maybe, maybe not! We’ll see!
June
Ingrid Nilsen, YouTube Personality
YouTube star Ingrid Nilsen came out in — where else? — a tearjerking YouTube video in which she talks about struggling with her sexuality growing up in an enivronment where it wasn’t okay to be gay. The community met her with open arms, as did fellow queer YouTuber Hannah Hart, who is now Ingrid’s girlfriend!
Ramona Bachmann, Swiss Soccer Player
In an interview at The World Cup, 24-year-old soccer player Ramona Bachmann told Swiss Publicaiton Blick, “I’m very open. I do not care if someone is with a man or a woman. In Sweden we deal with this issue fortunately also very open and easy.” She also revealed that she is currently in a lesbian relationship with a 21-year-old student named Camille Lara, who she frequently featured on her instagram account.
July
Janae Marie Kroc, Weightlifter
World champion powerlifter Janae Marie Kroc came out as a “Transgender/genderfluid Alpha male/girly girl Lesbian in a male body” in July.
August
Kristen Stewart, Actress
Broody lesbian crush object Kristen Stewart became the first celebrity in coming out history to be outed by her mother, in June, but the actress didn’t more-or-less publicly confirm her mother’s claim until a Nylon Magazine interview in August. After having her sexual orientation be a subject of speculation for basically her entire career, the revelation barely made a splash. Stewart herself downplayed its importance in a statement reflective of a growing acceptance in Hollywood (while ignorant of a lack of acceptance elsewhere), stating, “I think in three or four years, there are going to be a whole lot more people who don’t think it’s necessary to figure out if you’re gay or straight. It’s like, just do your thing.”
Lily-Rose Depp, Actress / Model
The 16-year-old French-American actress and model, the daughter of Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis, appeared in i0 Tillett Wright’s “Self Evident Truths” project, a “a photographic document of 10000 people in the USA that identify as ANYTHING OTHER than 100% straight.”
November
Holland Taylor, Actress
Although Taylor was not, to the best of our awareness (which is pretty aware!), an out lesbian, she said she’d always “lived out” in an interview with WYNC for a podcast this past November. But now that she’s fallen madly in love with Sarah Paulson (it happens), the truth is definitely out for real — Taylor, at the age of 72, is a lady-loving lady.
December
Jill Soloway
(Photo by Maarten de Boer/Getty Images)
Although Soloway has long been immersed in the queer community and has a transgender parent and a lesbian sister, she told The Advocate in 2014 that she still identified as straight (although that may be changing). In a profile published in The New Yorker this winter, Soloway went public about falling in love with somebody I have also been in love with for quite some time: poet and author Eileen Myles. Mazel tov!
KeKe Palmer, Actress & Singer
This is a late-add to the list, as the actress/singer revealed to People Magazine on Deember 16th that she does not want to label her sexuality, which means she’s not straight! Hurrah! The revelation came after rumors related to her lesbilicious music video with Cassie and snapchat photos of her and Cassie kissing. MERRY CHRISTMAS, WORLD!
Queers On Film: Stoked For Kristen Stewart as Lizzie Borden’s Lover, Raging Over Michelle Rodriguez’s “Gender-Swapped” Assassin
We’ve been doing pretty well with lesbian movies this season — Freeheld is wonderful and devastating and Carol might be the best lesbian movie ever made. Meanwhile, Stonewall, The Danish Girl and About Ray each found their own unique way to misrepresent and malign trans people.
Three new movies were announced yesterday with lesbian or bisexual characters and/or actors, and although I generally don’t care about the future and don’t like movies, these films remain relevant to my interests. Well, two of them do. One of them looks awful and we just want to bitch about it with you.
So let’s take a look at The Good, The Bad and The Ugly!
The Good: Hannah Hart in “Dirty Thirty”
The big guns at Lionsgate have picked up “Dirty Thirty,” a comedy starring YouTube sueprstars Grace Helbig, Mamrie Hart and Hannah Hart. The longform digital film is about a birthday party that goes off the rails, and was co-written by Mamrie and Molly Prather. 2014’s Camp Takota was a hit, and partnering with Lionsgate will bring this winsome threesome to a whole ‘nother level. We are basically assuming that Hannah will be playing a queer character because you know — it’s Hannah.
The Bad: Michelle Rodriguez in “Tomboy: A Revenger’s Tale”
Don’t get too excited by the title. Michelle Rodriguez will not actually be playing a tomboy. In fact, if The Human Centipede didn’t exist, this particular flick would be a strong contender for the Worst Movie Idea of All Time. Rodriguez will be playing a male “ace assassin” who gets double-crossed by gangsters and is then forced to receive gender reassignment surgery under the guardianship of a rogue surgeon played by Sigourney Weaver. The assassin is horrified to wake up as a woman and sets out TO GET REVENGE, “aided by a nurse named Johnnie, who also has secrets.” I hope Johnnie’s secret is that he works for GLAAD and is going to yell at everybody by the end of the movie.
Apparently the project originally had Frieda Pinto involved but “Pinto is no longer involved.” Good job Frieda Pinto! GLAAD has already weighed in on the project, declaring, “We haven’t read the script, but it’s disappointing to see filmmakers turning what is a life-saving medical procedure for transgender people into a sensationalistic plot device. We are at a crucial moment in the public’s understanding of transgender issues, and stories like these have the potential to undermine the progress we’ve worked so hard to achieve.” It’s also a ridiculously misogynistic premise, period. It’s bad for women, bad for tomboys and bad for trans people.
Plus it’s not even about a trans person, although it’s already being billed as a movie about a “transgender hitman.” A trans woman is a woman who was assigned male at birth, this movie is about a man who was assigned male at birth and is surgically altered against his will to more closely resemble a cisgender woman. As our Trans editor Mey Rude told me, “It seems like the cheapest way to capitalize on the trans “trend” that I’ve maybe ever heard. Having surgery doesn’t turn a person from a man into a woman, it just changes how he looks. Also it makes me sad that Michelle Rodriguez and Sigourney Weaver, two actresses I love, would agree to be in a movie like this.”
The story is based on a story by Denis Hamill. This isn’t the first time Hamill’s work has been adapted for the big screen — previous projects include “Critical Condition,” which starred Richard Pryor as a con man who fakes insanity to avoid jail time and then finds an opportunity to impersonate a doctor during the chaos of a power failure. Walter Hill, known for The Warriors and 48 Hours, will direct.
The film will come out in 2017, by which time everybody will already hate it.
The Ugly BUT AMAZING: Kristen Stewart in a Lizzie Borden movie
I’m sorry but I am obsessed with the Lizzie Borden story, so I cannot even be upset that the only film on this list that promises actual lesbian action (“actual lesbian action” is a top criteria for me when assessing a work of art) is about a sociopathic axe murderer. I’m also of the mind that stories like this aren’t necessarily offensive because the crime in question is so singular that it doesn’t really reflect on the lesbian/bisexual/queer female population in general. It’s the more subtle yet absolutely misleading and damaging contemporary tropes peddled by movies like Chasing Amy that fuck us up. Also it’s nice to hear that this film already isn’t intending to cut the lesbian parts out, like so many stories based on historical events do.
Last year’s Lizzie Borden Chronicles TV series starring Christina Ricci fizzled for me much like WGN’s Salem did — it was compelling at first, but once it began veering dangerously off the course of the historical story it was based on, it got stupider and stupider and became eventually unwatchable.
Director Pieter Van Hees is taking his own crack at the story with a film starring Chloe Sevigny as Lizzie Borden and Kristen Stewart as her live-in maid, Bridget Sulliva, with whom Borden obviously had a love affair. I CAN’T WAIT.
Gal Pal Watch: Is Kristen Stewart Single Or What?
It’s been a busy week for anonymous sources in Hollywood, what with all the tongue-wagging and speculation about Kristen Stewart and Alicia Cargile. Although the two confirmed gal pals used to appear in public often, dressed comfortably, sometimes holding hands, boldly showing the world how friendly they were towards one another, it seems that the pair haven’t been snapped by paparazzi in weeks. Because Kristen has made it abundantly clear to the press how much she enjoys having her private life dissected by tabloids, it’s awfully surprising that the pair would suddenly start keeping things so low-key. (Ed note: this is sarcasm.)
Artist’s rendering of Alicia and Kristen reveling in the spotlight
According to the tasteful reporters at Radar, Kristen and Alicia appear to have amicably ended their relationship, citing Stewart’s busy schedule of sulking, scowling and hanging out with wolves as the main cause of the breakup.
A source tells Radar, “They have a lot of love for each other and they always will, but Alicia does not want to be a part of her jet-setting life anymore. They had come to an understanding that this could simply just be a case of the right person, but wrong time.”
As we all know, there is simply nothing worse than being with a partner who expects you to jet-set all the damn time! “I’m sorry, babe, but I don’t think I can deal with another party on yet another boring yacht. I’m so over all the champagne on the private plane, can’t we just stay home and watch Empire or something?” Come to think of it, they do seem to spend an awful lot of time walking around LAX together…
Other publications go on to speculate that there might be a third party involved, since Kristen Stewart cheated on a person once and it was a whole thing and clearly she can’t be trusted to stay loyal to any partner ever again.
Later, Enstars followed up with yet another anonymous source (a very lucrative field in the greater Los Angeles area), this time with a firm rebuttal.
“Kristen and Alicia are first of all best friends and as far as them ending their relationship, it’s absolute nonsense. Kristen would never end her relationship with someone over a busy work schedule anyway. She has always made her relationship with Alicia a priority and they have a very smooth, understanding relationship.”
Phew. We here in the Autostraddle Vapid Fluff department are deeply invested in the continued romance between these two, and we can only pray that their love burns eternal. If there’s any justice in the world, the pair will emerge from their presumably very sexy hideaway, beanies a-slouched, lattes firmly in hand, ready to awkwardly avoid attention from the adoring public. Guys, I’m so sorry we’re like this. Godspeed, you crazy kids.
Pop Culture Fix: Lily Tomlin, Laverne Cox and Robin Roberts Hang Out, Talk About “Grandma” And Other Mesmerizing Stories
Autostraddle’s Pop Culture Fix is a weekly round-up of the queer arts and entertainment news you need in your life.
Big Screen Bombshells
+ Yesterday morning, the planets and stars aligned to create a gorgeous, significant moment in queer pop culture when both Laverne Cox and Lily Tomlin appeared on Good Morning America to talk to Robin Roberts about their new film, Grandma. It will be released in New York and Los Angeles on Friday and seems destined to grant Tomlin the Academy Award that has long eluded her.
Watch Lily:
ABC Latest News | Latest News Videos
Watch Laverne:
ABC Latest News | Latest News Videos
You want to know something that’s always so weird/gross when other people do it but is frikkin adorable when Lily Tomlin and Jane Wagner do it? Share social media. Also, Dolly Parton says she wants to hang out with her 9-to-5 co-stars on Grace and Frankie, so get on that, gracious goddesses of pop culture. (Please.)
+ In the wise and eternal words of The Backstreet Boys, Cate Blanchett needs to quit playing games with my heart. First, she’s had many relationships with women. But then wait, no, she has not had many relationships with women. And now she is having an on-screen relationship with Rooney Mara in the first trailer for Todd Haynes’ Carol and my swooning has reached peak levels. As you know, Carol is based on Patricia Highsmith’s 1952 lesbian pulp novel, The Price of Salt, in which Carol falls in love with a department store clerk even though she’s married (to a really boring, really rich guy, played by Coach Eric Taylor in this movie). As you also know, Cate Blanchett + period drama + lesbianism = The Ultimate Oscars bait.
I Want My MTV
+ The Teen Choice Awards happened this week. That is a thing where teenagers use social media to vote for their favorite things and the winners receive surfboards. Cara Delevingne won a surfboard. So did Liars who are Pretty. Ellen won also, and it was her seventh anniversary with Portia on that night and she gave the sweetest speech about being chosen and also being different.
https://youtu.be/VNeggYRqLng
A brand new season of The Ellen Show lands on September 8th, and her guests the first week are: Hillary Clinton, Caitlyn Jenner, and Malala Yousafzai!
+ Maybe Xena is coming back, after all? I can’t take this anymore! Just tell me something real, NBC!
+ The Real Housewives of Atlanta has added its first transgender cast member. Model Amiyah Scott will replace Nene Leakes on the upcoming season. I’m never going to watch some Real Housewives, but Nene Leakes was a marvel on Glee.
+ This is the hands down best thing I’ve read about Orange Is the New Black‘s third season: Uzo Aduba really wrote The Time Hump Chronicles!
“I don’t know if they have gone and taken it and now fleshed out the entire ‘Time Hump Chronicles,’ but when we were shooting it… those pages that were walking around, that you are watching in the scene, is the story,” Aduba said. “That is actually, legitimately, a story that I had to take home with me. They were like, ‘Put it in Suzanne’s words. How would Suzanne write this if she were to write this?’ That’s my handwriting, all of it. I put it out. I was crossing out things, just how I would imagine trying to pen this story. I was crossing things out and drawing because it’s supposed to be illustrated and drawing pictures… I don’t know where I was going with that stuff, but I was like, we are just going to let your imagination go.”
So when you see a woman in Litchfield — prisoner or guard — enjoying herself thoroughly while reading “The Time Hump Chronicles,” know that it’s because Aduba herself wrote each page by hand, in character. Making this story about a woman trapped between loves — including one with two, um, “instruments” — all the more personal.
WHAT! That is so amazing.
Video Killed the Radio Star
Julia Nunes has released a video for “Something Bad” from her upcoming Some Feelings LP. It’s one of the most adorable things I’ve ever seen.
Queer Folks Queering It Up Around Town
+ Cara Delevingne is speaking out about sex harassment and the dangers of body image in the fashion industry. In an interview with The Times, she said:
“I was, like, fight and flight for months. Just constantly on edge. It is a mental thing as well because if you hate yourself and your body and the way you look, it just gets worse and worse … I am a bit of a feminist and it makes me feel sick. It’s horrible and it’s disgusting. [We’re talking about] young girls. You start when you are really young and you do, you get subjected to … not great stuff.”
+ Rosie O’Donnell‘s daughter, Chelsea, was missing this week but now she has been found. I’m telling you this because it has been trending on Facebook for 48 hours and I was worried but now I am not worried. She disappeared with her dog and didn’t have her medicines!
+ Kristen Stewart and Jane Lynch were not straight together on Live! With Kelly and Michael on Monday. This video is pretty amazing. Michael Strahan keeps trying to get in on the conversation and failing.
https://youtu.be/P2FOPeZf75Q
+ Remember how much everyone looooved Hannah Montana? Well, Miley Cyrus hated it.
“From the time I was 11, it was, ‘You’re a pop star! That means you have to be blonde, and you have to have long hair, and you have to put on some glittery tight thing.’ Meanwhile, I’m this fragile little girl playing a 16-year-old in a wig and a ton of makeup. It was like Toddlers & Tiaras. I had fucking flippers.”
“I was told for so long what a girl is supposed to be from being on that show. I was made to look like someone that I wasn’t, which probably caused some body dysmorphia because I had been made pretty every day for so long, and then when I wasn’t on that show, it was like, Who the fuck am I?”
+ Megan Rapinoe was voted to the USWNT all-star squad.
+ Caitlyn Jenner covers Vanity Fair‘s special Trans America issue.
The issue also features Renée Richards, Chaz Bono, and Laverne Cox, and Andreja Pejic.
Also.Also.Also.
Kristen Stewart Isn’t Straight: Actress Addresses Sexuality Rumors, Says “I’m Not Hiding”
Sullen wolf goddess and noted poet laureate Kristen Stewart graces the glamorous cover of Nylon Magazine this month. In an uncharacteristically candid interview, Stewart addresses how uncomfortable she is being the subject of tabloid speculation, while giving this tabloid plenty to speculate about. The star explains that she toes the line between not caring at all about what people think and keeping her private life private; while she refuses to discuss the status of her relationship with ex-boyfriend Robert “Sparklevamp” Pattinson, she opens up more than she ever has about her very close friendship with Alicia Cargile.
For months, tabloids have been speculating about the pair, who hold hands in public, vacation together, and purportedly live together. Rags like the UK’s Daily Mail regularly refer to Cargile as Stewart’s “gal pal,” and make guarded remarks about how nice it is that the two are such good friends. Kristen Stewart’s been raked over the coals by tabloids for her relationship drama in the past, and she’s never been the kind of celebrity to revel in that sort of attention. She’s always seemed to find such publicity agonizing, and has displayed an (awesome) give-no-fucks attitude towards the paparazzi. She owes us nothing.
Exactly.
While tooling around Echo Park in her own car full of clothes and junk with a journalist (so down-to-earth!), Stewart laments the “weekly comic book” aspect of tabloid journalism and wishes she wouldn’t be so recognizable in public. However, when asked about her sexuality, Kristen responds: “Google me, I’m not hiding.”
This is the “I think it’s pretty obvious who I’m seeing” of the Stewart-Cargile era. Praise the heavens.
Pressed further, Stewart explains, “If you feel like you really want to define yourself, and you have the ability to articulate those parameters and that in itself defines you, then do it. But I am an actress, man. I live in the fucking ambiguity of this life and I love it. I don’t feel like it would be true for me to be like, ‘I’m coming out!’ No, I do a job. Until I decide that I’m starting a foundation or that I have some perspective or opinion that other people should be receiving…I don’t. I’m just a kid making movies… I think in three or four years, there are going to be a whole lot more people who don’t think it’s necessary to figure out if you’re gay or straight. It’s like, just do your thing.”
Kristen Stewart respectably does not care even one bit what this column thinks about her relationship, nor does she feel the need to define it for us – and that’s awesome. It’s exciting to see an actress with her level of visibility acknowledge that sexuality can be fluid, and that it isn’t a big deal. It’s commonplace nowadays for celebrities to offer every single aspect of their lives for public consumption, and Stewart refuses to do that. I am a monster for writing this article right now. Kristen, I’m sorry I’m like this.
The September issue of Nylon is out Aug 25, and includes other fun tidbits like this bit about Joan Jett teaching Kristen guitar on the set of The Runaways: “If I wasn’t fully feeling it, she’d walk to the end of whatever set or stage I was on and be like, ‘Kristen, pussy to the wood!'” I never thought about what it would be like to get guitar lessons from Joan Jett, but now I can’t stop thinking about it.
Kristen Stewart, you don’t need us! You don’t need any of us! BE FREE.
Pop Culture Fix: “Masters of Sex” Tackles Lesbian Pregnancy and Kristen Stewart Tackles Lesbian Rumors
Welcome to your very special one-of-a-kind Pop Culture Fix, a weekly love affair where we catch you up on all the relevant pop culture news of the day.
Today is quite a day because Pretty Little Liars came out as transphobic and Kristen Stewart came out as “not straight,” and both of those items will be addressed in a few hours in their very own posts by their respective on-staff experts: Pretty Little Liars recapper Heather Hogan and Gothip Girl Stef Schwartz.
Sexually Fluid Celebrity Corner
+ There is a very important Kristen Stewart interview with Nylon Magazine making the rounds today in which K-Stew is the most candid she has ever been about her sexual fluidity. Stay tuned for the full report from Gothip Girl later today!
+ Miley Cyrus is on the cover of Marie Claire, talking about things and stuff:
As she opens her front door, Cyrus’ dogs circle around her ankles, barking excitedly. Like her studio, her home is hospitable and unaffected—there is nothing to suggest global superstar celebrity. There is, however, a 5-foot-tall embellished bong and a dildo covered in pink and red puffballs, art projects of Cyrus, though, she emphasizes, “The bong works.”
The full interview isn’t online yet, but some snippets are, like this one about why she started The Happy Hippie Foundation:
A lot of us are born into some shit, you know what I mean? Lately, I’ve been talking a lot about my being gender-fluid and gender-neutral. And some people snarl at that. They want to judge me. People need more conventional role models, I guess. But I just don’t care to be that person.
If you care about the future:
+ Sarah Silverman will return for a three-episode arc in Season Three of Masters of Sex, and her storyline will feature Betty and Helen trying to start a family. Show creator Michelle Ashford:
“We have a great story. Helen decides she really wants to have a baby and so it’s about what did gay women do in 1966 if they wanted to have a baby. It’s like seeing the very very beginnings of that movement when gay couples decided to have children. It’s really touching. She’s determined. She wants to have a baby and they want to stay together.”
+ Faking It comes back August 31st and we’ve got the scoop.
+ Patti Smith’s book “Just Kids” will be a Showtime mini-series.
+ The Lion King sequel will be a TV series.
+ Jennifer Nettles will play Dolly Parton’s Mom in “A Coat of Many Colors”
+ Beetlejuice will have a sequel.
+ The Jem & The Holograms movie has a new trailer.
+ Annabeth Gish will be part of The X-Files reboot.
+ Britney Spears will guest star on Jane the Virgin.
+ The Twin Peaks revival will debut in 2016 or maybe in 2017.
+ Lily Rabe will play lesbian serial killer Aileen Wournos on American Horror Story: Hotel.
+ BET is developing a New Edition mini-series.
+ Fox Searchlight is probably working with the BBC on an Absolutely Fabulous movie.
Laverne Cox Dances It Out
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnYcRuc9S1E
All The Things She Said
+ TV Execs wanted to whitewash Awkward Black Girl but Issa Rae shut that down.
+ I was very unimpressed with how Donald Trump’s jab at Rosie O’Donnell was received. So was Chely Wright, who took to Facebook to talk about it:
Nearly ALL 5,000 people allowed this man– who aspires to be the leader of OUR America– to publicly bully, mock, attack Rosie O’Donnell (again– he’s been doing it for a decade and it’s bothered me for as long), but they cheered him on as he did it.
Wright also linked to a Huffington Post article by Elizabeth Birch outlining just some of the work Rosie has done over the years:
When I came to work with her, I could not have imagined all she had quietly done in her then short career to help people in need. By 2005, she had already contributed well over $60,000,000 to charities focused on the health and well being of children. Through her own charity, the For All Kids Foundation, she contributed millions in capital grants to hundreds of day care centers all of the country serving low income children. This was not someone else’s money nor leveraging her celebrity. This was investing her own hard earned cash. And her generosity began well before she hit pay dirt on the Rosie O’Donnell Show.
Birch details the work Rosie did after Katrina, the work she’s done with Rosie’s Broadway Kids foundation, and so much more.
+ Naya Rivera did a pregnancy photoshoot and talked to Yahoo! about pregnancy and internet trolls.
+ Vulture spent a day at the office with out actress Lily Tomlin and talked about her career, Grace & Frankie and her upcoming film, Grandma, in which she plays “a semi-retired gay professor and poet.”
+ Eight female showrunners from the CW did a panel at TCA about being women in the television industry and it was pretty cool:
Sometimes you’re on other staffs of other shows or you’re not the showrunner and you have to do a rape storyline and you don’t want to do it. People are going to be watching it and they’re going to see your name on the episode and they’re going to think you think that’s what it means. Like, this is your interpretation of what it feels like to be a female and suffer this — and it’s not. It’s your own staff of the show, and this is what you kind of have to write, and it’s just such a horrible position to be in as a writer, and I don’t want to put any other writer in that position
Queer Things You Can Watch Right Now
+ RED, a Brazilian webseries that “tells the story of Mel Béart and Liz Malmo, two actresses who meet while shooting a short film and end up taking to their real lives the romantic relationship that they portray in fiction as Scarlet and Simone.”
+ Clean Hands, a short about a “troubled lesbian marraige.”
Also:
+ In Praise of Willow Smith and Black Girls Who Dare to Be Carefree
+ Disney Princesses without makeup
+ ONTD has unforgettable dance scenes from movies.
+ The Boozy Underbelly of Saturday Morning Cartoons
+ Take a look inside Karrueche Tran’s Closet
+ Straight Outta History, the Rage That Makes Movies: “Universal Pictures took on one of its more delicate challenges on Tuesday: making sure that the studio’s film “Straight Outta Compton” heals more wounds than it reopens.”
+ Meet Eight New Afrofuturism Artists Creating a Future of Color
+ Here’s your Orange is the New Black Guide to Prison Makeup
Pop Culture Fix: Kristen Stewart Grows Up, Bravo Fucks Up, Carrie Brownstein Speaks Up and Other Uplifting Stories
Welcome to your pop culture fix. This was not a great week for people like me who don’t care about the future. All the news this week is about the future!
First a quick note: today is PRIME DAY on Amazon, when there are lots of sales for Prime members. If you shop on Amazon today you should use this link OR if you decide to join Amazon Prime today you should do so via this link so that instead of giving all your money to a corporation, you can give all your money to a corporation and they will give a percentage of it back to us! There you go.
Unusually Attractive Humans
+ This month Marie Claire took their turn offering the world a “revealing” interview with press-wary probs-queer starlet Kristen Stewart. After reading the passage, “Stewart drops her head, tugs at the hem of her simple black sweatshirt. Fans away a mosquito. Yanks a fallen tube sock from its cotton pool in her Converse sneaker,” our Executive Editor Laneia noted, “i would read an entire post just on these things.” The magazine hits newsstands July 21st and hopefully contains lots of information about Alicia Cargile. HAHAHAHAHA
+ Laverne Cox has some words about cultural appropriation, following that time that people saw “Watch What Happens Live” and then awful things happened, live, causing Laverne Cox to be roundly criticized throughout the media for not striking back when a rich white cis man called a black teenager a “jackhole.” Kara Brown at Jezebel has one primary feeling about this, which is “Andy Cohen is working my last fucking nerve.”
Andy Cohen, shut the fuck up. You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. What entire wealth and fame of the Kardashian Klan has been built on emulating black women in a more marketable white body while fetishizing black men. Kylie Jenner’s dumbass cornrows not only looked ridiculous, but continue a pattern of her wearing blackness like a costume.
+ Carrie Brownstein and Corin Tucker give advice to the fine young cannibals of Rookie.
+ Bad news for New Puck: Marley-Kate and Ryder Bieber-Strong are married.
+ Speaking of marriage, Glory Johnson would like $20,000 a month in spousal support.
+ You should be crushing on Brandi Carlile.
The Teevee
+ Remember Anyone But Me? Welp, you’ll be able to see LOST SCENES from your fave lesbian webseries starting September 1st on Hulu and September 15th on YouTube. Rachael Hip-Flores and Nicole Pacent, Autostraddle’s Top Critters of 2009, will be reprising their roles as Vivian and Aster:
In response to the continuing outpouring of requests from our fans and the many newcomers to the show, we brainstormed and came up with an inventive idea to expand the series by writing and producing ten scenes that, although they stand alone, could have been a part of specific episodes over our three seasons. And we’ll tease the audience to watch the entire show again, so they can see where we imagine these new scenes might have appeared but were never placed. We’ll be shooting in L.A. Allison Vanore and PJ Palmer return as Producers.
+ Flavorwire saw “I Am Jazz” and they liked it.
+ What it’s like to be a contestant on Master Chef.
+ Trans actor Tom Phelan, who plays Cole on The Fosters, talked to The Hollywood Reporter about his role and his personal background:
Has seeing portrayals in media made your everyday life any easier given that the subject is less taboo than it used to be?
Yes and no. I think it’s very important for people looking for depictions of themselves in media, but I think as far as real, concrete change, it’s not going to do a lot. To be perfectly honest, I don’t think the most violent trans misogynists are going to be watching The Fosters. We’ve come a long way with being in the public eye, but in terms of lessening violence, there hasn’t been a lot of change. Media representation is great, but it’s not going to promote visible, genuine change. Media representation is for the community and for young trans kids and it’s for people looking to see themselves. I don’t think it’s for the rest of the world. Its primary function is to serve as a looking glass so that people who feel lost and confused can look and see themselves.
+ Anna Pulley would like to know why Orange is the New Black won’t admit bisexuals exist. Also if you are “scary looking,” then you could be on the show.
+ Um, so HBO is doing a six-part mini series by David Simon, creator of The Wire, about a young mayor in 1960s Yonkers tasked with implementing federally mandated integration. Also Winona Ryder is in it. So you’ll want to check that out.
+ Sharon Van Etten wrote a song for Tig Notaro. Also, The New York Times saw Tig and they liked it.
+ Do you like Button & Bly’s travel show? Say so!
The Movie Shows
+ The Oscar voting block is getting a wee bit more diverse.
+ Not a Pretty Girl: How Women Are Fighting Pop Culture’s Tyranny of Attractiveness
+ Dianna Agron will be playing a “tomboyish lesbian” in a movie called “Hollow in the Land.” No word on whether or not this will be the same “tomboyish lesbian” role she plays in your sex dreams.
+ If you would like to watch the trailer for Amy Pohler and Tina Fey’s Christmas movie, Sisters, you absolutely can go ahead and do that immediately! You’re so lucky!
+ Troop Beverly Hills is a deceptively subtle take on glamour
+ All the lessons we learned from “Cluleless” 20 years ago. TWENTY YEARS AGO?!!