Also.Also.Also: You Deserve These Holtzmann Outtakes and Other Stories for Your Weekend
Hello there you are! Tag team, back again. Hey are you afraid of the dentist? I AM. Right after this roundup is published, I’ll be on my way to a new dentist and I am terrified as fuck. It’s all I can think about! I hate teeth!
Queer as in F*ck You
+ NEARLY 10 MINUTES OF HOLTZMANN OUTTAKES ??! Damn it, you deserve this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v8hfSKLU9vs
+ A Black, Queer, Single Mother on Why I Am Proud to Use the Term ‘Single Mother by Choice’.
+ Michelle Tea Probes Being Female, Broke, and Queer in America.
+ Domestic Violence Shelters Are Turning Away LGBT Victims.
+ Eileen Myles: “Locker Room Banter” is Just Another Name for Patriarchy.
Doll Parts
+ Here’s Miriam Zoila Pérez, a brilliant person with whom I’d like to share a pan of nachos and some feelings: The Radical Doula Merging Pregnancy and Abortion Care.
+ Clinton Denounces Trump’s ‘Scare Rhetoric,’ Vows to Protect Abortion Rights.
+ BLM Cofounder Patrisse Cullors: ‘How Do We Tell Our Survivor Stories?’
+ Interesting! Really, I’m not being sarcastic. Yes, the Gender Wage Gap is Real, New Report Says.
+ The Racist and Sexist History of Keeping Birth control Side Effects Secret.
+ Drawing Attention: Lauren LeBlanc interviews Girl on Girl Collective.
+ A Fear of Taco Trucks is a Fear of Mexican Women.
+ An interview with Elizabeth Gilbert on Feminism and Creative Living.
+ The Nasty Pussies at Trump Tower.
+ Stevie Nicks Wants to Do an All-Star Version of “Landslide” at Hillary Clinton’s Inauguration. Yes, good, thank you.
+ Bitch’s Halloween Horror Flixtape.
Saw This, Thought of You
+ Michelle Obama gave a speech in Phoenix yesterday and it was
G L O R I O U S.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_nGNLo_Zy1Q
+ “All the Black and Brown People Have to Leave”: Trump’s Scary Impact on How Kids Think.
+ Just an update from Monday’s roundup, in case you missed it: Charges Dropped Against Amy Goodman for Covering DAPL.
+ America’s Real Life Horror Movie Houses, Mapped.
+ A Spooky Movie (or Two) for Every Remaining Night in October.
+ Excuse me, but this exists:
+ I think about this with more frequency than you might expect: Self-Taught Typists Are Nearly as Fast as Touch Typists.
And Finally
Talented Hamsters Recreate Great British Bake Off. OH YOU HEARD ME.
So Which Is Gayer, “Ghostbusters” or “A League of Their Own”?
Whether or not Sony knew just how much the Ghostbusters reboot was going be championed as a movie about queer romance and friendship, we have certainly taken it there. We do this often as a community – taking seemingly generic family films and bending them into something we can recognize – because if the best we’re going to get in terms of mainstream representation is subtext, y’all better believe we’re running with it! And if people are confused as to how we’re able to weave in these queer backstories and theories with such conviction, the answer is simple: we’ve had decades of practice.
We cut our teeth on movies like Young Man and A Horn, All About Eve, and Fried Green Tomatoes, but never had we been put to work quite like we were with A League of Their Own. Admittedly, the undertones in this film starring Geena Davis, Orange is the New Black‘s Lori Petty, Rosie O’Donnell, and Madonna about the formation of the All-American Girls Professional Baseball League that was to replace Major League Baseball while the men were away in WWII was lost on me as a child. Thankfully here in America, TBS has been airing it on loop four months out of every year since it came out in 1992, so I’ve gotten to watch the film’s nuances unfold in real time.
Now that Ghostbusters has proven itself worthy of this esteemed tradition almost 25 years after we initiated A League of Their Own, it begs the question: which is gayer?
Plot
Ghostbusters: Four friends set out to save New York City from an impending ghost invasion.
A League of Their Own: Women from all over the country come together to create the nation’s first professional women’s baseball league.
I mean.
Victor: A League of Their Own
Stars
Ghostbusters: Melissa McCarthy, Kristen Wiig, Kate McKinnon, Leslie Jones
A League of Their Own: Geena Davis, Lori Petty, Rosie O’Donnell, Madonna
Again, this one is a bit unfair. Kate McKinnon certainly pulls her weight, but Geena Davis has been many a queer woman’s root, Lori Petty was Tank Girl, Rosie is Rosie, and Madonna is Madonna.
Victor: A League of Their Own
Characters
Ghostbusters:
Abby (Melissa) – Abby seems tentatively gay in a way where she doesn’t actively date women but she does sign up for OKCupid a couple of times a year for a week to browse women’s profiles before deleting her account without messaging anyone.
Erin (Kristen) – The way Erin swoons over their assistant, Kevin, is sort of classic straight girl, but because Kevin is the human equivalent of a golden retriever, that doubles back as gay.
Holtzmann (Kate) – Is Holtzmann.
Patty (Leslie) – Quite frankly Patty seems down for whatever.
A League of Their Own:
Dottie (Geena) – Even though Dottie’s married we know she’s gay because her husband, Bob/Bill Pullman, has the least sexually threatening presence on earth and that’s 101 Don’t Know I’m Gay Yet. (Also I know right now many of you are in a Kate McKinnon fog and it’s going to be hard to not immediately have your minds made up on this one, but I will tell you this: Geena Davis as Dottie in A League of Their Own was Holtzmann before there was Holtzmann.)
Kit (Lori) – Kit’s has an active disinterest in men for most of the film, which makes her end of the movie boyfriend feel hilariously tacked on.
Doris (Rosie) – Doris is your classic butch who even gets her own beard!
Mae (Madonna) – Mae is clearly bisexual.
With the exception of Mae, Dottie and the gang feel more anchored in their tropes of denial. In a face off between Mae and Holtzma[passes out].
Victor: A League of Their Own
Outfits
Ghostbusters: Jumpsuits
A League of Their Own: Skirted uniforms
This one is not as obvious at it may seem. Sure, there is a queer element to women in pants since there was a time when women weren’t allowed to wear them in public, but ultimately for me the deciding factor here is the accessories. High socks and ball caps are no match for goggles, belts, backpacks, finger gloves, straps on straps, and guns.
Victor: Ghostbusters
Affiliations
Ghostbusters: A paranormal fight squad
A League of Their Own: The Rockford Peaches, a team in a women’s baseball league
We were on equal footing until peaches came into play. They were neither from Georgia or Florida, and symbolic imagery is real.
Victor: A League of Their Own
Nicknames
Ghostbusters: Holtzmann, aka “Holtzy”
A League of Their Own: “All the Way” Mae Mordabito, Betty “Betty Spaghetti” Horn & Alice “Skeeter” Gaspers
Coming from years of personal experience playing sports: calling someone by their last name is way gayer than coming up with a new nickname all together.
Victor: Ghostbusters
Interpersonal Dynamics
Ghostbusters: There is definitely tension between Abby and Erin for most of the film that reads like Erin is internally pleading for Abby not to mention their probably romantic past. Abby knows this about Erin and shifts that energy she’s being forced to suppress at Holtzmann. Patty and Holtzmann operate for most of the movie in that sweet spot of a crush where even doing terrible things together is exciting.
A League of Their Own: Doris is in love with Mae and irrationally considers them to be dating even though deep down she knows Mae just thinks of her as a friend. On the surface it could seem like Mae and Dottie never warm up to each other because Mae thinks Dottie is stuck up, but really it’s because Mae knows Dottie is the one person who could top her and that is too much to handle. Dottie avoids hanging out with the team during down time because subconsciously she knows what happens when you play with fire (you get turned).
This one’s close but I’m going active over passive here.
Victor: Ghostbusters
What They’re Fighting
Ghostbusters: I’m A Nice Guy/Sexism
A League of Their Own: Themselves/Sexism
Victor: Ghostbusters
Dialogue
Ghostbusters:
Holtzmann: “Forgot about my new toys.”
Holtzmann: [to Erin (me)] “Come here often?”
Erin: “Proton guns are all well and good, but sometimes you need the Swiss Army.”
A League of Their Own:
Dottie: “No, Bob and I are driving home. To Oregon.”
Ellen Sue: “Batter up, hear that call. The time has come for one and all… to play ball.”
Radio Announcer: “When our boys come home from war, what kind of girls will they be coming home to?”
Victor: A League of Their Own
Davis vs. McKinnon Standout Moments
Ghostbusters:
A League of Their Own:
Victor: Ghostbusters
Featuring Men
Ghostbusters: Chris Hemsworth, Bill Murray
A League of Their Own: Tom Hanks, Jon Lovitz
Bill Murray is dressed like gay antique dealer in Ghostbusters, but Tom Hanks has a distinctly lesbian feel to him. Plus Jon Lovitz is literally recruiting girls for “the team.”
Victor: A League of Their Own
Cameos
Ghostbusters: Sigourney Weaver as a hot scientist who seems to be into younger women.
A League of Their Own: Garry Marshall (rip) as a rich white guy who loves candy bars and watching ladies play ball.
Victor: Ghostbusters
Closing Credits
Ghostbusters: Chris Helmsworth dancing?
A League of Their Own: MEMBERS OF THE ORIGINAL ROCKFORD PEACHES WHO ARE ALL LIKE 90 AT THIS POINT PLAYING A GAME OF SOFTBALL WHILE MADONNA’S ‘THIS USED TO BE MY PLAYGROUND’ PLAYS IN THE BACKGROUND.
Victor: A League of Their Own
Final Tally
Ghostbusters: 6
A League of Their Own: 7
In the words of the announcer from A League of Their Own, “Take me home momma and put me to bed. I have seen enough to know I have seen too much.” What an inspiring performance by both teams. One for the books! Remember: we are all winners here. And Ghostbuster fans, there’s always a chance to reclaim the title with Ghostbusters 2.
Notes from a Queer Engineer: What “Ghostbusters” Gets Right About Women in STEM
Header by Rory Midhani
As a quality engineer working in consumer goods manufacturing, I spend a lot of time communicating with coworkers and contractors half a world away. I interface with people from a broad range of backgrounds, all of whom brought different motivations, language capabilities, and levels of technical understanding to the conversation. Job title is usually (though not always!) a pretty good gauge for expected technical skill and motivation going in. When it comes to language skills, however, you just kind of have to jump in and see how it goes. It often doesn’t unfold quite the way you want or expect it to*, but there is one helpful rule of thumb I’ve picked up: humor = fluency. If your conversation partner is able to successfully understand a joke you’ve told, they have advanced language skills. If your conversation partner is able to successfully tell you a joke, they’re fluent.
I loved the most misandrist movie of the year for so many reasons, but chief among them is this: with the release of Ghostbusters, I feel like Hollywood is finally reaching the point of fluency when it comes to representations of women in STEM.
Also: Kate McKinnon. Good grief. I have no words.
I’ve spent a lot of time scouring pop culture in search of characters like me, and I can tell you definitively: there aren’t that many. We don’t get to see mixed race Filipina faces in Hollywood movies all that often. We don’t get to hear women casually calling themselves bisexual. We do get to see women working in STEM, sometimes, but I often find the writing to be frustratingly reductive.
Some things I’ve seen and do not wish to see again:
- Lady Scientist Needs Rescuing – For example: Dr. Ryan Stone (Sandra Bullock) in Gravity, rescued the only man by within literal striking distance (Matt Kowalski/George Clooney) after her emotions override her apparently nonexistent astronaut training. If that’s not bad enough, the male character even reappears to save her as a hallucination after he dies because the writers couldn’t imagine a way for the woman to save herself. Like, Matt Damon gets The Martian and we get this shit? Come on.
- Lady Scientist Randomly Takes Her Clothes Off – See Carol Marcus (Alice Eve) in Star Trek Into Darkness. In an early scene of the movie, she decides to change clothes in front of the male lead (James Kirk/Chris Pine). With the shuttlecraft back door hanging wide open. When there’s absolutely no reason to change outfits. (This is, by the way, the same character we’re told is a weapons expert, yet defuses bombs by frantically yanking the innards out and hoping for best. Brilliant choices all around.)
- Lady Scientist Is A Romantic Prize For The Male Lead – Remember how Charlie Blackwood (Kelly McGillis), the hot flight instructor in Top Gun, was an astrophysicist? No? Me neither. Probably because Charlie’s defining characteristics were only deemed important when they happened to further the love story with the male lead (Maverick/Tom Cruise).
- Lady Scientist Teaches Male Lead An Important Moral Lesson – See Gwen Stacy (Emma Stone) in The Amazing Spider-Man. Dr. Emma Russell (Elizabeth Shue) in The Saint. Dr. Grace Augustine (Sigourney Weaver) in Avatar. The list goes on.
Don’t get me wrong — I’m happy these stories exist. But these characters aren’t exactly the work of a culture fluent in depicting women in STEM. Ghostbusters manages to avoid every one of these tired tropes, and made me laugh for nearly two hours straight. Humor! Fluency! We’re getting there, you guys. We are.
Note that these women are also all white.
As a viewer, even the smallest moments of Ghostbusters brought me joy. Erin at her desk, confusedly asking if her beige, three button, windowpane plaid suit is “too sexy for academia.” (It’s not, but I relate to her struggle.) Holtmann in her lab, offhandedly scoffing that “safety lights are for dudes.” (They’re not, but I’m delighted by the idea of mildly implied gender disparagement being lobbed at men for once.) Patty wincing after being dropped by the crowd, saying “OK, I don’t know if it was a race thing or a lady thing, but I’m mad as hell.” (It’s both, probably, and I’m delighted by all the meta-ness going on.)
I especially loved Holtzmann’s character. I’ve never seen a woman in Hollywood play the eccentric scientist/tinkerer type before, and I’m thrilled by the idea that girls growing up today get to see a woman in that role. After X-Files, the “Scully Effect” resulted in an uptick in young women entering careers in STEM, and we still see the effects today.
In the past couple years, we’ve gotten women-centered reboots of Boy Meets World, Full House, and Star Wars. Despite the tantrums of man-babies and haters, Ghostbusters is now part of that list, and I couldn’t be more excited. I hope we keep this momentum going and reboot all the moderately enjoyable comedies of my youth. I want Back to the Future with all women. Honey I Shrunk The Kids. Men in Black. Flubber. Yes: Flubber. Kate McKinnon should have some free time in her schedule by 2018, and my body is ready.
*Note: my coworkers often speak Cantonese, Mandarin, a local dialect and English, so if anyone’s deficient in this situation, it’s me.
Notes From A Queer Engineer is a recurring column with an expected periodicity of 14 days. The subject matter may not be explicitly queer, but the industrial engineer writing it sure is. This is a peek at the notes she’s been doodling in the margins.
Look, All The Women In “Ghostbusters” Are Gay — Deal With It
By now, you’ve probably heard that Kate McKinnon’s character in Ghostbusters—the tool-loving, ghostbusting engineer babe Jillian Holtzmann—is the queer action hero of your dreams. But the Holtzmann Is Super Hella Gay narrative misses out on one crucial Ghostbusters detail: THEY’RE ALL QUEER. Sony, no doubt, doesn’t want you to believe there’s anything gay about any of the ghostbusters. Paul Feig could only grin and nod when asked if Holtzmann—who is probably the gayest scientist to walk the earth—is indeed gay. He had to be coy about it because of “dealing with the studios,” but Feig definitely seems to be in on the Gay Holtzmann reality. And maybe, just maybe, Feig and Katie Dippold worked even more queerness into the script that they knew would get by Sony but would catch the eyes of those among us who are seasoned Gay Subtext Detectives.
Here is what I saw when I watched Ghostbusters, and as Detective Superintendent (this is a very high rank, which I know because it was Helen Mirren’s rank in Prime Suspect) of the Gay Subtext Detectives, my interpretation is basically law:
Abby Yates (Melissa McCarthy) and Erin used to date. Maybe it happened right away, right after Abby became the only person who believed Erin saw a ghost at the foot of her bed every night. Or maybe they really were just friends for a long time until they became something a little more (think Carol and Abby, but in this case, things worked out a little better). Abby was one of the first people who didn’t just see Erin as “ghost girl,” and ever since, they’ve had a very close relationship. Here’s the thing: They started out friends. At some point, friendship turned into something a little more. Then they got wrapped up in paranormal science, and they wrote a book together—a book that Abby quite literally refers to in the film as their child.
“But, Kayla!” say the naysayers. “A human woman and another human woman can share the most sacred and intimate parts of their lives together and be each other’s emotional support systems and also just be friends.” I propose the following counterargument: Nope.
Sure, I’ve oft heard of women being friends with other women. I even delightedly participated in the practice of befriending other women myself. But I know gal pals when I see them, and even more so, I know ex-gal pals when I see them. And when Abby and Erin reconnect in the beginning of Ghostbusters, it 100% looks like two exes tensely reuniting. Erin’s timidness and Abby’s resentment in that scene make me think Erin is the one who ended things. The deeper they got into their paranormal research, the deeper they got in their relationship, and the more entangled and inextricable the two parts of their lives became. Erin got out of the ghost business, and she got out of the relationship, too, because she could no longer tell where one ended and the other began.
love triangle
So when Erin left, Abby eventually rebounded with Holtzmann. There’s no better rebound than an ethereally hot and flirtatious engineer who has an arsenal of powerful toys—er, “weapons.” Abby and Holtzmann never dated, but they hooked up a few times and decided to just keep being friends and co-workers because they genuinely enjoy each other’s company and also probably still make out from time to time after a few post-laboratory drinks. Indeed, in that scene where Erin and Abby are reuniting, there’s a sense that Holtzmann is sizing Erin up, and Abby cozies up awfully close to Holtzmann to see how her ex might react.
Holtzmann and Abby also very casually bring up the time they spent several nights together in the Chelsea Hotel. Supposedly, they were just there to track ghosts, but I’m sure there was time for other activities—ones that don’t involve ghosts but do involve the feeling of transcending the spectral plane and entering a new dimension. (Orgasms. I’m talking about orgasms.)
Everyone’s screaming about how gay Holtzmann is, but Abby’s equally covered in a thick coat of subtextual queerness, especially when it comes to how she acts around Erin. When Erin, who I am positing as the resident bisexual, develops a light crush on Kevin (Chris Hemsworth), Abby doesn’t understand it at all. She’s probably thinking what we all are: Who would be looking at Kevin when Holtzmann is right there, her combat-booted feet propped up on her desk as she leans back and methodically fingering her goggles? Abby and Holtzmann might just be occasional makeout buddies, but Abby certainly knows how smoking hot her co-buster is. At one point, she gets very close to Holtzmann’s face. I’m talking almost-kissing close. Sure, she’s technically possessed by a ghost at the time, but I choose to believe that she’s so physically attracted to Holtzmann that she temporarily overrides Rowan’s strength in the moment.
And then there’s the greatest love story of them all: Holtzmann and Patty (Leslie Jones). Patty, at first, is slightly terrified of Holtzmann’s intensity. But she certainly isn’t immune to her swagger, and soon enough, she finds herself falling for the sexy weirdo. Note that Patty is the ghostbuster who comes up with the affectionate nickname “Holtzy” for her. Holtzmann flirts with everyone—and has chemistry with every ghostbuster, every ghost, and every stranger on the street throughout the movie—but she starts to fall for Patty. Their connection deepens when Patty saves Holtzmann’s life from Rowan-Abby, and it all becomes very official when Patty slaps the ghost out of Abby, because that definitely seems like something Holtzmann would be into.
By the end of the movie, Patty and Holtzy are practically sewn together by the seams of their jumpsuits. Holtzmann’s tearful toast is directed at all her fellow ghostbusters, but when she talks about how they taught her how to love, it sounds like Holtzmann might finally be ready to seriously commit to a relationship. The power of Patty compels her. “That was real. That was real,” Patty says. And just like that, their relationship is the real deal. (Holtzmann subsequently has to end things with her “mentor,” played by Sigourney Weaver, who she had a casual thing with as evidenced by their palpable chemistry during one of the credits scenes.)
this is how Patty looks at her Holtzy
Erin and Abby are back together in the end, too. It took saving New York City and a whole lot of green slime for them to realize they belong together. When Erin jumps into the vortex to save Abby, she says that she wasn’t going to leave her a second time. Again, these two might as well be wearing signs that say “we are ex-girlfriends.” In that moment, I could have sworn they were going to kiss right before they get pulled back up into reality. But then, I was sucked back out of my own vortex of gay delusions and faced with the harsh reality: Like ghosts trapped between our world and theirs, the queer subtext of Ghostbusters never quite breaks through to the surface.
there is nothing straight about this movie
Look, one of the most subversive aspects of Ghostbusters is that it’s a movie about women that doesn’t hinge on any kind of romantic plot. It’s about bad ass ladies bustin’ ghosts and not needing any men to help or give them permission (Kevin is wonderfully expendable). But I think it’s even more than that. They don’t merely not need men; they don’t want men, either. The male gaze is entirely absent from the film (which is probably a huge reason why straight cis dudes are so up in arms about it). These women just seem so different from any characters I’ve ever seen in a summer blockbuster and yet so familiar to me. There’s power in the movie’s lack of overt relationship drama or romance, but as a lesbian who has loved action movies my whole life, there’s power in the narrative I’ve constructed here, too. And you know what, it’s pretty substantiated. I may be extrapolating, but I am pulling my theories from very real, very present stuff. This is basically science, y’all. I’m certainly sick of settling for subtext, but I cannot deny that this was the most queer summer blockbuster my gay eyes hath ever seen.
Say it loud, say it proud: Ghostbusters is gay.
Kate McKinnon’s 10 Gayest “Ghostbusters” Gay Moments of Gay
By Kayla and Audrey
Ghostbusters is super gay. Well, it’s subtextually super gay, because Hollywood remains resistant to the mere notion of a queer summer blockbuster. But at least Kate McKinnon is here and queer and ready to destroy us with her sex appeal that reaches near-paranormal levels of intensity in the movie. Real Life Queer McKinnon stars as the gunslinging—and gun-licking—engineer Jillian Holtzmann, whose queerness cannot be confirmed nor denied by Paul Feig thanks to studio bullshit, but it’s pretty obvious throughout the film that Holtzmann is the queer action hero we all deserve.
Here are the 10 gayest things McKinnon does in Ghostbusters that had us melting in our seats.
1. Is incredibly sexy while appealing Not At All to the male gaze
Can we get Kate to come to camp and teach a workshop on How To Gay? Holtzmann is fully aware of her sex appeal, and she leverages it first and foremost for her own pure delight, and secondly to make Erin (Kristen Wiig) question her sexuality. This is an inspiring and moving portrait for me as a bisexual (hi, this is Audrey) who would strongly prefer that no man ever speak to me unless I give him permission to approach.
2. Stares with fascination every time Erin flirts with Kevin (Chris Hemsworth)
#straightpeople
3. Wears clothes, specifically:
3a. A crop top + overalls + motorcycle jacket ALL AT ONCE
3b. This silk floral vest and tie combo
3c. The jumpsuit. Y’all. Jumpsuits are gay.
4. Dances with power tools
Holtzmann loves her tools. She’ll even concisely explain the importance of carrying a Swiss Army Knife at all times to you, because she cares about your safety and also about tools. At one point, she quite literally starts dancing with her tools to DeBarge’s “Rhythm Of The Night,” and Erin, like any sensible human, can’t look away.
5. The Wink
This wink has been haunting us ever since the trailer dropped.
6. Uses safety goggles as a fashion accessory
McKinnon wears at least three (3) different pairs of goggles throughout Ghostbusters, which begs the question: Does Holtzmann have an entire closet just for goggles? The goggles are for safety, but they’re also occasionally for pushing her perfectly coiffed hair out of her eyes so that she can stare directly into your soul. (“I now identify as a Goggles Lesbian” – Kayla)
7. Possesses an impossible amount of swagger every time she’s on screen
help
Jillian Holtzmann’s swagger could level a city. The only thing more powerful than her many ghostbustin’ gadgets is the way she makes you feel whilst merely leaning against something. McKinnon makes it damn near impossible to focus on anyone else when she’s in the frame.
8. Gives a tearful toast to how much she loves the other Ghostbusters
It’s just very important that her friends know how much she loves them. And is it just us or does she extra love Patty (Leslie Jones)? Patty is the only one who refers to Jillian by the affectionate nickname “Holtzy.” Our P.K.E. meters are detecting gal pals. Ultimately, one of the best things about the movie is that romantic relationships aren’t the focus, but let’s be real: Holtzmann has sexual chemistry with every single ghostbuster, and they have probably all at least thought about kissing her on the mouth.
9. Gleefully watches hot women play with her gadgets, cackles when they explode
I’m not writing terribly euphemistic fan fiction, YOU’RE writing terribly euphemistic fan fiction.
10. This
Oh Neat, Another Man is Trying to Kill “Ghostbusters” Before Its Second Weekend
Despite the Man Baby Crusade to derail the powerhouse that is Melissa McCarthy, Kristen Wiig, Kate McKinnon and Leslie Jones in the 2016 reboot of Ghostbusters, the film made $46 million dollars at US and Canadian box offices in its first weekend, making it the highest live-action comedy opening since Pitch Perfect 2 in 2015. It’s an opening weekend pull that nestled snugly in the middle of Sony’s $40 to 50 million dollar projections, and earned McCarthy as well as director Paul Feig their largest debut. Sony executives have been vocal about their support for the film and their excitement for its – by their own standards – success. Moviegoers that were primed to like it don’t just like it; they’re losing their minds over it on social media.
And yet Jeff Bock, box office analyst for Exhibitor Relations, is VERY WORRIED about the Ghostbuster legacy. He spoke with The Hollywood Reporter about it in an article yesterday:
“I know Sony is crowing about it being a great opening for a comedy, but the entire Ghostbusters legacy is what’s at stake here, and it’s not looking good. This was supposed to be a blockbuster.”
THE ENTIRE GHOSTBUSTERS LEGACY IS AT STAKE HERE. You know, how it was when 1989’s Ghosterbusters II that (adjusted for inflation) had a similar opening of $56 million its first weekend. Also if we’re talking about legacies here, people were perfectly fine letting Val Kilmer play Batman only for it to have four more reincarnations after the fact, not to mention the FIVE Spiderman movies packed into just 12 years with back-to-back actors who had the combined charisma of a baguette, so the legacy’s fine. *Lindsay Lohan as Cady Heron voice* The legacy does not exist.
He continues: “Curiosity played a big factor in the $46 million debut and, as such, I doubt it will hold like a typical Feig comedy.”
Curiosity! Not genuine excitement, as I’m assuming we’re not framing this through the perspective of the women who made up 56% of the audience this weekend. Sorry, but the only women that are curious about this movie are straight women after seeing Kate McKinnon as Holtzmann. No, I think the curiosity Bock is talking about is coming from the same condescending riser where men show up to see how the girls fare!
But people don’t pay $17 for a movie because they are curious, they pay 17 whole dollars because they want to see the movie. Those who don’t, blog about it. Or write racist tweets about it.
Then he says, “Sony definitively did not launch a franchise, and seemingly they might be the only ones that don’t know it. I know it’s been a tough road for them, and I feel for them.”
“I feel for them.” These poor executives in charge of these poor women. You know what Bock could do instead of prepping the burial site for Ghostbusters at every turn? I don’t know, give it more than a week? Remind himself of his own analysis of how critical opinion influences a film’s future, specifically films like this one? Earlier this year he told CNBC, “Critical opinion can have a significant impact on a film’s success if it targets a specific genre that is susceptible to reviews.” And, no, Bock isn’t technically a movie critic, but quotes like, “It isn’t looking good,” and, “I doubt it will hold,” about a film that has done exactly what it was expected to are critiques that are a part of the same conversation.
Bock keeps going: “The more I ponder it, the worse this scenario plays out.”
Okay, guy, relax. Sony, the people literally in charge of Ghostbusters’ legacy, already think it’s ripe for a sequel and again you’re already angling to kill it. But I guess that’s the point! If it’s a ghost then maybe a man can come by and suck it away into a box forever.
42 Insightful “Ghostbusters” Reviews From Actual Adult Males On Facebook Who Definitely Aren’t Sexist
The all-new lady-centric Ghostbusters came out last weekend, inspiring positive reviews from people who liked it, as well as negative reviews from people who didn’t like it. Both of those groups have been sharing their feelings on this matter on the official Ghostbusters fan page, which was originally created for fans of the original film. 25% of the comments about the remake are vomit emojis and reminders that Ghostbusters made less money last weekend than The Secret Life of Pets, 50% of them are positive endorsements of the film from people of all genders, 5% are women who hated it and 20% are men who hated it. The excerpts on this listling come, of course, from that last group. (This is not to say that all women liked the movie, or that disliking the movie is anti-feminist. But this IS to say that a lot of the men who hate the movie are misogynist mansplaining asshats.) (Oh yeah; and a lot of the people who hate it are also mean and racist!)
Below please witness excerpts from comments left recently on the Ghostbusters Facebook page, ripped mercilessly out of context but mostly presented in their entirety. I have edited some of these comments for clarity, grammar and spelling. Some of the misspellings and bad grammar I left intact for artistic reasons.
1. Call it what it really is: Malebusters
2. As a man I refuse to watch. The whole “feminist agenda” doesn’t appeal to me.
3. This movie was made by women wearing strap-ons and guys wearing dresses! Lol!!!
4. Who you gonna call? Someone else
5. Just watch Scooby Doo 2 Monsters Unleashed. It was the exact same movie complete with fart jokes. The Ghostbusters themselves seemed a ripoff of the whole Mystery Inc. gang. Just like Scooby, the Leslie Jones character would find the ghost and run in fear being chased by the ghost back to the group. Kate McKinnon could be labeled as Fred: blond hair, sometimes scarf around her neck. Kristen Wiig in the roll of Daphnie, the damsel in distress. Melissa McCarthy as Velma: book smart, complete with glasses. Chris Hemsworth was Shaggy: dumb and carefree, even came with properly timed sandwich-eating. They could have just cast Seth Green as the creepy weirdo villain guy for another cameo bit. The whole script was hollow and full of cheap gags just like Scooby Doo. Just my opinion.
6. We’ve read the emails — we know you forced Ivan Reitman out. We hate you Sony.
7. Emphasis on the boooooo
8. Women feel the need to bully men into having a positive opinion about a movie, otherwise, disagreeing makes them “manbabies.” Meanwhile, other genders are able to act as nostalgic, geekish, childish in their entertainment favorites as they like, and it’s considered perfectly fine.
9. And the trophy for the most misandrist movie of the year goes to ….. ghostbuster 2016
10. This movie deserves an award.. – WORST MOVIE OF THE FKIN CENTURY
11. If [Kate McKinnon] spent as much time in the kitchen as she did trying to do a man’s job, we could get more accomplished.
12. These four women aren’t funny of what I’ve seen in the five trailers that I’ve seen.
13. I would rather watch a 24-hour Richard Simmons marathon in a rainstorm with jumper cables attached to my nipples than watch this movie
14. It bombed big time. Like worse then Jem did. Like worse then Gigli.
15. My band is named after the creature that wreaked havoc during the 3rd reconciliation of Gozer the Destructor. With that said, I’m not watching this til it comes out on DVD.
16. I just seen a bunch of women that wished they were as good as men. Terrible movie.
17. Wow! What a pathetic attempt by feminists. Going to start a petition to get my money back.
18. Should have listened to fans instead of pandering to Twitter feminists.
19. If I found a free copy of this movie in the street, I wouldn’t walk it the next few steps to the garbage can. Oh, that’s a lie. I hate litter. I’d be a good citizen and chunk it.
20. I’m surprised they didn’t show all these ladies cats?
21. Nothing makes me want to see a movie quite like being told to “get over it.” That alongside “women are funny” “women rule” “women women women” really drives home the point that this movie is all about the fact that the new Ghostbusters are women.
22. This is not Ghostbusters, this is just a big nothing compared to the ORIGINAL. WHERE ARE MALE PEOPLE. And don’t act like womans are better than males. It’s tied between the two so stop please.
23. I left to get popcorn and the claw machine was more entertaining.
24. I will see this piece of garbage about the same time when Joel Schumacher apologizes for the two Batman movies he did…
25. There are plenty of women who aren’t better than me but can do better things, there are plenty of women who make more money than me but aren’t better. There are plenty who I make more than but I’m no better. I won’t give in imagine if Lord of the Rings was remade in a few years because… women empowernent.
26. Feminists everywhere insist everyone is sexist, but it’s sexist for people to be producing all-women films when the characters were male to begin with. Honestly, people are pretending to like this BECAUSE it is women. (That’s sexist too.)
27. I had the choice of: working in 100-degree weather and 100% humidity mowing the lawn, pressure washing the house and painting the deck OR seeing this movie. Yard and house look real nice.
28. They shouldn’t have tried to remake a classic, and insert socio-political propaganda into it as well…
29. Okay Ghostbusters, why did you think this was going to work? A group of feminist ghost-catchers? Complete fail and I didn’t even see it. The previews were enough.
30. SONY handing out those checks for positive revues…
31. Thats totally how restaurants drum up business, whats that you dont like pizza? Well your sexist and racists against Italians then
32. Now that The Sisterhood Of The Traveling Ghosts has proved to be garbage can we please get that ghostbusters movie that was promised to be for actual fans?
33. Films like this one, is the exact reason females aren’t taken more seriously in Hollywood.
34. Anyone who wastes their money on this abortion is a fool.
35. I hope she gets proton cancer from licking those guns
36. I saw the movie GHOST IN THE SHELL witch isn’t trash and is actually entertaining
37. All a positive review does is prove how easily a small mind is amused.
38. Cutting my toenails with a butter knife would be a more entertaining and satisfying way to spend the evening.
39. It’s a action chic comedy ,not bad ,not good …Only thing I like was seeing the original Ghostbusters and Sigorney weaver ..some where middle end ,got to predictable and lame .Positive thing I can say ,as a writer …the writing was good, the acting good ,the blonde ghost buster chic. ..crazy hot ..Thor was good as secretary ,but girls saving NYC nope ! Not convincing.
40. It’s hard to take anyone seriously who looks like a bunch of rejects from Whataburger
41. They deleted my comment… Hiding the truth.
Pop Culture Fix: Kate McKinnon is a “Pansexual Beast” But Her Ghostbusters Character Can’t Be and Other Stories
Yo! This is your pop culture fix! This is where we talk about real things happening to real people right in your own backyard!
The director of the new lady Ghostbusters would’ve really liked to make Kate McKinnon’s character gay, but couldn’t, because of the studio. From The Daily Beast:
But while McKinnon is SNL’s first openly lesbian cast member, Ghostbusters offers only hints on Holtzmann, who spends her free time shamelessly flirting with Erin. I ask Feig: Is Holtzmann gay?
He pauses, smiling. “What do you think?”
I’d like to think yes, I say. He offers a grinning, silent nod. “I hate to be coy about it,” he offers. “But when you’re dealing with the studios and that kind of thing…” He shrugs apologetically.
“You know, Kate is who she is and I love the relationship between Kate and Melissa’s characters,” he says. “I think it’s a very interesting, close relationship. If you know Kate at all she’s this kind of pansexual beast where it’s just like everybody who’s around her falls in love with her and she’s so loving to everybody she’s around. I wanted to let that come out in this character.”
Regardless, Kate McKinnon is the best.
+ Look I’m gonna do the next 52 minutes of your life a favor: here’s a roundtable with Ilana Glazer, Lily Tomlin, Rachel Bloom, Allison Janney, Niecy Nash and Gina Rodriguez for The Hollywood Reporter. It’s totally unedited, which is cool, it’s like going to a panel. They end up talking a lot about confidence and insecurity and it’s like, inspirational.
+ George Takei was not delighted to learn his Star Trek character, Hikaru Sulu, would be queer in the forthcoming “Star Trek Beyond,” calling it “unfortunate” because it twisted Gene Roddenberry’s initial creation. However, Simon Pegg, the film’s writer, responded that the unfortunate part is that “the screen version of the most inclusive, tolerant universe in science fiction hasn’t featured an LGBT character until now.” But maybe LGBT diversity has been there all along, it’s only just now going mainstream.
+ Dolly Parton feels “more like a family member or an aunt or an older sister or a friend” to her LGBT Community than an icon. DO WITH THAT WHAT YOU WILL. Oh also she’s releasing a song called “I’m a Wee Bit Gay,” so look out for that.
+ Television shows that got bisexuality SO wrong include Sex and the City. Discuss.
+ “The Block” has cast its first ever lesbian couple – Julia and Sasha.
+ GLAAD has partnered with Project Greenlight on a new LGBTQ filmmaking contest, “See Yourself.”
+ As aforementioned, Whitney Houston and Robyn Crawford were a thing.
+ Relive the hits of the badass women celebrated at VH1’s hip-hop honors? Don’t mind if I do!
Girls Ain’t Afraid of No Ghost: New All-Women Ghostbusters Lineup Announced!
It seems like almost a decade ago we were promised a new Ghostbusters sequel or reboot or whatever, often with the promise of a new, all-female cast. Well, now we finally know who it will star! The Hollywood Reporter reports that comedy stars and co-Bridesmaids Melissa McCarthy and Kristen Wiig will be joined by current SNL hilariladies (that’s a term, right?) Kate McKinnon and Leslie Jones as the new, funnier team of Ghostbusters.
Wiig and McCarthey in Bridesmaids copyright Universal Press
Of course Melissa McCarthy first hit the big time as the chef Sookie on Gilmore Girls (now on Netflix) and then has enjoyed a huge career resurgence since her Oscar-nominated role in Bridesmaids, starring in movies like Tammy, The Heat and the upcoming Paul Feig spy comedy Spy, as well as her Emmy-winning role in the TV show Mike and Molly. Wiig, who not only starred in Bridesmaids, but also co-wrote it, first became famous from being amazingly funny on Saturday Night Live. More recently, she’s starred in more indie movies like The Skeleton Twins, dressed up like Harry Styles on The Tonight Show and been the funniest presenter along with friend Bill Hader at the recent Golden Globes.
This will be the first major film role for McKinnon, an out comedian who has been the funniest member of the SNL cast for the last few years. Maybe she’ll play a queer Ghostbuster, wouldn’t that be amazing? Or hey, if any of these actresses play a queer ghostbuster that would be amazing. Jones is also a super funny current SNL cast member, probably most famous for her appearances on Weekend Update. She also had a role in the recent Chris Rock film Top Five.
Jones on Weekend Update via splitsider
All four of these women are extremely funny and talented and I can’t wait to see them fighting ghosts together. We already know that Wiig and McCarthy have great chemistry together in the movies and Jones and McKinnon have it on SNL, so things are looking really good. Although I loved the original Ghostbusters, I’m way more excited for this than the rumored sequel with the original cast (minus Harold Ramis who recently passed away). I’m pretty sure everyone who saw the original wished for more Sigourney Weaver, Annie Potts and Gozer, right?
Paul Feig, who directed both Bridesmaids and The Heat will be directing, and there is no announced release date.
We’re still waiting to find out what role the hilarious and super talented Brittani Nichols will be playing, although roles including “mayor,” “person whose home or place of business is being haunted,” “and/or lovestruck,” “the talk show host who interviews them and asks if they’ve seen Elvis lately” and “Vigo” (of Ghostbusters II fame) have been hitting the Autostraddle rumor mill.
image made by our own Cecelia