A Shot at Tila Tequila: The Autostraddle Interview

Tila Nguyen, now known as “Tila Tequila,” was born in Singapore on October 24th, 1981, to French Vietnamese parents who emigrated there after the Vietnam War. A year later, her family moved to a strict gated community in Houston, Texas. A young rascaly tomboy, Nguyen was eventually sent to boarding school for her “combative behavior” and upon returning home she got mixed up with drugs, joined a gang, tried to turn her life around, and eventually fled her hometown at the age of 16 for Queens, New York with $300 dollars in her pocket. She returned to Houston when the money ran out and worked as a stripper. Eventually she was discovered at the Sharpstown Mall by a Playboy scout, which launched her modeling career.

Tila first showed up on our radar in 2007 when MTV began airing the abominable bisexual dating show A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila. Did you, like us, watch it anyhow, like the guiltiest guilty pleasure ever? Did you see Season Two and if so, were you also struck dumb around episode 205 when you realized that Tila was serious? You know; about love? Remember? Lisa the hawt softball player was sick of “the game” and hating the player, some dude named Bo got busted in the chin fighting with another male contestant, and Tila was crying about how she really did just want love and you realized OMG, those aren’t alligator tears. And maybe, like us, you felt empathy. Hang on to that.

Tila on the first season of "A Shot at Love"

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See, now that Tila’s come out as a big ol’ lez, the fact that she built her empire by amassing male sexual desire & affirmation is suddenly way more interesting. It’s just so easy to hate on Tila, like she’s her own worst enemy, and so when we were ragging on Tila a few weeks back about her lesbianism, we floated an idea — Why don’t we just call her? Why don’t we just talk to Tila Tequila?

So: forget that her ideas about relationships and her catty “retaliations” against celeb “haters” can seem very seventh grade. Forget all the pent up hatred you’ve let seethe over the years and forget her crazy videos, her crazy blogs, and the very bad-for-bisexuals TV show.

If you forget everything you think you know about Tila Tequila, she’s actually pretty fun to talk to. Admittedly, I went into my interview with Tila this week expecting very little. No, she’s not a rocket scientist, and I still don’t understand or like a lot of the things she’s said and done. But during our half-hour phone conversation, she made me laugh easily and endeared herself to me.

So take it or leave it, here’s our shot at Tila Tequila.

Lola: I feel like there are a million things I need to ask you, because you’re all over the news these days! So first off, how has coming out as a lesbian affected your life?

Tila: It’s really changed my life. I’m happier than ever, because a few weeks later I got to announce my engagement to my fiancée, Casey Johnson. My life is just totally different than I had ever imagined! It’s really good; I’m really excited!

Lola: Did you have an “a-ha!” moment, where you realized you were a lesbian and not bisexual?

Tila: Well, that was the moment where it kind of scared me. I started realizing it for a long time, but I was in denial, of course. Recently, after the whole incident with [Shawne Merriman] – and even before that – I kept thinking back, “What’s wrong with me? Why do I always pick the wrong guys? Why am I not attracted? Why am I always single?” I started asking myself questions like that, and thinking, “What was the longest relationship I’ve ever been in with a guy?” That was only six months, and it was a long distance relationship. And the fact that he was totally like a girl [laughs] played a huge factor in me realizing, “Oh, my gosh!” I picked guys that I thought girls like me were supposed to date. I thought that girls like me would date football players, even though I’m not attracted to them.

Lola: Right, because you’re a “sex symbol”.

Tila: Right, because I didn’t have that connection, I didn’t know what I was supposed to do. That was my “a-ha!” moment [laughs]. That’s when I realized I only had sex with guys, but I would kick them out immediately, and I felt disgusted. And they’d always call like, “Why are you dissing me? You’re a little player.” I’m not a player – I just think it’s disgusting!

Lola: You got this bad reputation, even though it was actually because you’re gay.

Tila: Right, that was really weird.

Lola: So, your longest relationship was only six months. Do you think marriage will be a struggle for you? That’s a huge leap!

“I just want people to see me for who I really am, and not how the media always paints me. I am so not that person. I’m actually really caring, and I’m not a wreck.”

Tila: Well, I think marriage is a struggle for anybody. The first week after announcing our engagement, we had a lot of talks. Within a week, I felt like it was five months. [laughs] We had talks about everything. You have the first couple weeks of butterflies, where you’re like, “I love you! We’re gonna be together forever!” And the next week is like, “OK, these are the rules. If you want this to work out, this is what we have to do.”

Lola: That sounds so gay.

Tila: [laughs] It’s so gay!

Lola: You know, the lesbian processing…

Tila: Exactly, it’s like the U-Haul stereotype, moving in the next day. She brought in her two dogs – you can hear them barking now [laughs] – and all her stuff. And it started driving me crazy, because I have to work. So, we had to sit down and talk for a couple of days. We went through it all, and now we have a schedule worked out, and it’s really amazing.

I told her, “Look, your past relationships are not like this one. The past is the past. Love is about being selfless. Maybe in your past relationships, you were selfish, where you expected your partner to do everything for you. But everything I do for you is selfless.” You have to start thinking about the other person first, how things will affect them – and blah-blah-blah, all that gay stuff! [laughs] So now, it’s working out really well, because she and I understand that we’re supposed to be in each other’s lives to enhance, to be a bonus, not a distraction or an aggravation.

Lola: Totally. Now that you have that part out of the way, are you two planning the wedding?

Tila: We’ve actually been talking about that. We were really excited, but then we realized that we can’t get married in Los Angeles. I’m friends with the Kardashians, and they’re allowed to get married. I’m happy for them, but it makes us realize, “Wow, we’re not allowed to get married.” All of our friends, especially Casey’s, live in L.A., but in order to make it a legal marriage, we’d have to go somewhere like Iowa or Vermont. I think that’s really unfair.

So, we’re trying to figure that out, whether we’ll have just a fun wedding ceremony for all of our friends here, and then get it legalized in one of those other states. We’re really fighting for gay rights. Now I understand what it feels like, because we really want to be together, and it sucks that we can’t have a lavish, wonderful wedding and share it with everyone here. We’re still planning it out.

[noise in the background] Oh, here she is! She knows I’m doing interviews right now, so she’s going into the other room to do her work. [dogs barking] And keep the dogs quiet, honey! [laughs]

Lola: Aww, is that her dog in the background?

Tila: Yeah, my dog is a good girl; she doesn’t bark. [laughs] Casey, say hi! [Casey says “Hi!” in the background]

Lola: Hi, Casey!

Tila: Oh, my God. [laughs]

Lola: It sounds crazy!

Tila: Yeah, chaotic. The dogs just knocked over a vase, but Casey’s gonna clean that up! So, let’s put on a smiley face and continue our interview. [laughs]

Lola: Well, how do you react to gossip, like Courtenay Semel badmouthing your relationship with Casey?

Tila: I think Courtenay is really, really sad and lonely. Casey and I have nothing to do with her. The funny thing is, the minute Casey and I got engaged, the first thing I did was write to Courtenay. I said, “Hey, I know we haven’t spoken in over a year, but out of respect, I want you to know that Casey and I got engaged. I hope you can be happy for us, because we’re really happy. We’re really looking forward to starting our lives together, and starting fresh, with no drama. I hope you’re doing well; I just wanted to tell you this out of respect.”

Tila with her ex-girlfriend Courtenay Semel

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And – proving that money cannot buy you class – this girl is out there slandering us, doing sit-down interviews about us, saying our rings are fake, saying Casey’s broke, blah-blah-blah… Why doesn’t she just leave us alone and let us be? She’s trying to press charges, and go after Casey, doing all this crazy stuff… I just wish that she could find love, and someone to love her one day, so she’ll understand. ‘Cause when you’re in love, you don’t care about other people’s lives; you’re in your own world.

Lola: Right, you don’t waste time trying to bring other people down.

Tila: Yeah, Casey and I just lie in bed and we plan our future. We spoke to my brother yesterday about having the baby. We’re excited! Courtenay is the last thing on our minds. I’d just like to tell her and anybody else who’s trying to bring us down, “God bless you all. I hope one day you can find true love like Casey and I have found. Let us be, and if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” We have better things to do, like raising a family! [laughs]

Lola: Yeah, tell us about that!

Tila: Well, I’m in the process of adopting a daughter – Casey has a three-year-old daughter, named Ava. We have a lot, a lot, a lot of things going on! [laughs] Casey and I joke around that we should have a show called The Dysfunctional Functional Family. [laughs]

Lola: Would you want to have another show? You had a dating show, but your real life sounds way more interesting.

Tila: Yeah, I think a reality show about this life would be really hilarious and fun, because it’s very family-oriented. It’s very chaotic. It’s very dysfunctional, yet functional. [laughs] We’re lesbians having a baby, but I’m [carrying a surrogate baby for my brother].

Lola: It sounds like a soap opera, but it’s real. [laughs]

Tila: [Casey interjects] She just interrupted my interview, and said “functionally dysfunctional” – put that in bold!

Lola: You should market that to MTV.

Tila: Yeah, I think that would be a really great TV show, because it would open people’s eyes to something important, such as gay marriage and how normal it can be, just like any other family. We have a daughter, we have three dogs, and we have a beautiful home. I’m working, and she’s doing her thing.

I’ll be this short, little, fat, mean pregnant woman. I’m not gonna give a f*ck about paparazzi. I’m gonna have rollers in my hair, wearing my pink pajamas, 500 pounds, throwing pickles at the paparazzi, saying “F*CK YOU!”

I’m having my brother’s [surrogate] baby, and Casey said, “Wow, your brother sounds really hot.” I went, “Shut the hell up! You’re disgusting.” [laughs] That’s when I thought, “Oh, my God! This is really dysfunctional.” That’s when we came up with that idea. I told her that we’ll be walking down Robertson, and I’ll be wearing my pink Teletubbies pajamas. I’ll be this short, little, fat, mean pregnant woman. I’m not gonna give a fuck about paparazzi. I’m gonna have rollers in my hair, wearing my pink pajamas, 500 pounds, throwing pickles at the paparazzi, saying “FUCK YOU!” [laughs] And I told Casey she’s going to have to roll me around in a wheelchair, ‘cause I’m not gonna walk.

Lola: See, when you’re pregnant you can get away with that.

Tila: Exactly. I can get away with being mean, and wearing no makeup, having meltdowns on the street. That’s OK, because I’m pregnant! [laughs]

Lola: Do you think you’ll want to have your own kids with Casey, after you give birth to your brother’s baby?

Tila: I think right now, there’s enough on my plate. [laughs] I think that will be way later down the line, absolutely. But right now, I think getting all this started is exciting enough. We’ll start here, and later on we’ll talk about having more.

Lola: Let’s get sappy – When did you fall in love with Casey? What’s the story there?

Tila: It’s funny, because I used to hate her. Casey and I used to hate each other, because we knew the same people. Within Hollywood circles, it’s like high school gossip. We’d never met each other or seen each other face-to-face, but we always heard about each other and I really hated her. Then I finally met her, through personal stuff we were going through. So, I reached out to her, and we became friends. We just clicked really immediately.

Lola: Aww…

Tila: And then one night, she came over like a train wreck. I had to tell her, “Casey, calm down. Breathe. It’s not the end of the world.” I fixed her hair a little bit, we started playing dress up… and then, next thing you know, we got engaged.

She is not at all the person the media made her out to be, what her fake friends made her out to be. She’s actually very beautiful, and I’m trying to help her see that about herself. She is truly a beautiful and loving person, as am I. I think God put us together for a reason, at this time in our lives. I really believe in love at first sight.

Lola: Yeah, once you actually saw each other in person! [laughs] That’s so sweet.

Tila: Fate, serendipity, whatever you want to call it. I feel very blessed.

Lola: Sorry to switch to such a dark subject, but what’s happening with your case against Shawne Merriman?

Tila: It still really upsets me. I could have easily given up on it, moved on with my life, and not have to deal with it. It’s really dark and negative, and brings me back to a dark time I do not want to remember. The only reason I’m still continuing to fight for it is because I know what’s right; I know that he knows what went down, and I know that God knows. And I know that doing this will give a lot of women faith again. A lot of women wrote to me, and they were so excited to see me fighting back. When my case got thrown out, a lot of those women disappeared, because they got scared. They thought, “Wow, if nobody took Tila Tequila seriously, then nobody will ever believe me either.” It’s costing me a lot of money. People don’t realize that I’m paying a lot in lawyer fees, and I don’t have to do that. But the reason why I am is because I want my justice, and I want justice for all other women out there. You don’t have to stay quiet. You can be strong, and fight for it, and not be afraid, no matter what. That’s why I’m continuing this battle.

And I have my wife and family to support me now, so I think everything is happening just the way it should. I’m happy.

Lola: That’s good to hear. What’s the hardest thing in your life? Because it sounds like you’re doing really well now.

Tila: The biggest challenge right now is the way the public views me. I’ve always been very outspoken, very carefree, and I stand by what I say. I stay true to myself. The biggest thing I’m trying to change right now is the way people view me. They only know me from A Shot at Love… which was five years ago, you know? I just want people to see me for who I really am, and not how the media always paints me. I am so not that person. I’m actually really caring, and I’m not a wreck. I know exactly what I’m doing; I’m just a little wild. I’m definitely not a librarian, or a nun…

Lola: And you’ve got a mouth on you…

Tila: Yeah! Exactly, but at least I’m honest about it. I stand by that.

Lola: Do you think that the lesbian community has been more accepting of you now?

Tila: Half of them have been pretty supportive. The other half, who don’t know me well, have been really judgmental. Recently, there was this gay blogger – I’m not gonna say who, ‘cause I don’t want to give him any more publicity – who blasted on me, saying, “The LGBT community doesn’t want you, ho! Have a seat!” I think it’s rude, and his hatred toward me reflects his own self-hate. Certain people can’t handle seeing a strong, sexy woman, and so they slam on us. People like him should shut up, and just be grateful that there are more public personalities fighting for gay rights. Instead of talking shit and slamming me, he should be supportive, because I’m out here being an activist and fighting for gay rights. I think what he’s doing is sending out a really bad message to straight people, and he’s hurting himself by doing that, too.

Lola: Right, within our own community, people try to tear down each other. It’s so counterproductive.

Tila: Yeah, it’s really sad! It doesn’t make sense to me; we should stick together. Hopefully, after people read this interview, it will change their minds about me. But if not, it doesn’t matter. I’m still happy. I’m still going to fight for our right to get married. I’m going to buy my Teletubbies pajamas, and throw pickles at paparazzi!

Follow Tila Tequila on twitter and check out her website, Tila’s Hot Spot.

Houston Largest City to Elect Openly Gay Mayor, Don’t Mess With Texas Srsly

LESBIAN MAYOR: With Annise Parker winning nearly 53 percent of the vote late Saturday, Houston became the largest city to elect an openly gay mayor. Last night, with wife Kathy Hubbard by her side, she told supporters: “I know what this means to many of us who thought we couldn’t achieve higher office. But let us at this moment join as one community. We are united in making Houston the city it should be, could be, can be and will be.”

The Christian Science Monitor says her election in a state which outlawed same-sex marriage is telling of the national mood:

“As gays and lesbians become broadly accepted in society and politics, that acceptance is marked by a firm boundary beyond which voters do not yet appear willing to cross: same-sex marriage.”

FAMILY TIES: What is happening with the world when stories that open with “According to the National Enquirer” are accepted as fact? So we’re just gonna tell you that Meredith Baxter, according to a sketchy unreliable source, is going to marry her girlfriend. Or not.

GAY SCIENCE: According to this author, gay people are like female orgasms or male nipples: we don’t know why they exist evolutionarily, but it is kind of cool that they do! There are many, many traits of humans and other living things that are incidental by-products of evolution. They’re not the traits that were selected for. They’re incidental by-products of the traits that were selected for. Let me give an example. Let’s ask the question, “Why did bones evolve to be white? What is the selective advantage of bones being white?” (@blowfish)

BRING IT ON: Five Life Lessons Learned From the Ladies of ’00 Films: “So everything that doesn’t fit into some stupid idea of what you think God wants you just try to hide or fix or get rid of? It’s just all too much to live up to. No one fits in one hundred percent of the time. Not even you.” (@jezebel)

BULLYING: Were you bullied in middle or high school? Judith Warner was, and is still thinking about it. These days, I come back a lot to memories of 7th and 8th grade (and the unreliable narrators of those memories), because my elder daughter, Julia, is now in 7th grade, which means, of late, that she lives in a world filled with endless girl dramas of the most unfortunate and, alas, ordinary kind. Her article stirred up a lot of feelings over at Jezebel: “We editors reminisced about our own 13-year-old accomplishments and the wondrous potential of that age. In fact, it’s a time I try to avoid thinking about, since it’s when the cozy cocoon of childhood broke and I found myself the target of casual mockery on a daily basis.” Also, if you want to read more about how the world shortchanges women from the age of 13 on, we recommend Schoolgirls: Young Women, Self Esteem, and the Confidence Gap, by Peggy Orenstein, one of the best books ever to exist. And then just listen to Tina Fey, she will help you — (@nytimes, @jezebel)

CIVIL UNIONS: The Austrian Parliament has approved legislation that will give same-sex partners the right to enter into civil unions with “most of” the same rights as hetero marriage. Once you’re done celebrating that, try to wrap your head around the fact that the author of this article then spends five paragraphs discussing “So how much did Sacha Baron Cohen’s “Bruno” character and movie have to do with this move by Austria’s government?” He must have known it was Sunday Funday. (@examiner)

SPERM DONOR: A gay Irish sperm donor has won visitation rights to the child that was created from his sperm and that a lesbian couple is now raising. This is sad, because it means that lesbian partners and their children are not recognized as a legitimate family unit by the Irish government, but also awesome because it means that WILL AND GRACE IS COMING TRUE. Seriously does anyone else remember that arc where Jack and Rosie had a kid? (@irishcentral)

ACTUAL GAGA: Bitch must have read our Christmahanakwanzakah wish lists, because they have a whole article about Lady Gaga’s sexuality! Does she feed into negative stereotypes about bisexuality, or can she be our shining star? “The only thing I’m worried about is that it could appear to some, who don’t know much better, that bisexuals are those that are interested only in men for relationships, but will enjoy sexual relationships with women purely for fun. I hope it doesn’t further that awful stereotype, and that Lady Gaga isn’t put in the position of being the poster child for women who like women only while drunk and horny.”Also, in other news, Intern Rachel had no idea until right now that Gaga makes out with a lady cop in the Love Game video! Merry Christmas! (@bitch)

Big Gay Sketch Show’s Nicol Paone: The Autostraddle Interview

Nicol Paone is very busy, very funny and very very good looking. In addition to her spot on The Big Gay Sketch Show, which we’ve been told by multiple sources (Kate McKinnon, Julie Goldman) will actually premiere its third season in 2010, in March maybe, definitely for sure, Nicol’s got a healthy portion of funny sketches on Funny or Die, starred this summer in Judd Apatow’s “Funny People,” and has just added “stand up comedy” to her impressive list of special skills. In fact, she was performing on the Sweet Cruise, both in the Karaoke bar and on the stage, and was very funny!

Riese & Alex of Autostraddle.com sat down (’cause like I said she’s been standing up a lot lately HAHAHAHA) with Nicol Paone on the Sweet Cruise to the Caribbean to talk very quickly about life, love, work, and other important topics.

Nicol Paone’s sketch reel mostly from The Big Gay Sketch Show::

Nicol: Let’s rip it up.

Riese: Tell me what you’re working on right now.

Nicol: Screenplay. Actually, I’m writing and I’m also doing some stand-up around L.A.

Riese: You were doing improv up until now, how did you start wanting to do standup?

Nicol: I did standup when I first got to LA. I just loved doing characters and going in that direction. Now, the immediacy of standup is thrilling for me.

You don’t need to get directors to see your point of view or film it or rehearse it or find other people. Instead you think of something or something funny happens, you get up on stage that night, you do it, the audience tells you whether they think it’s funny or not. I find it thrilling and fun.

Riese: It doesn’t make you nervous?

Nicol: No. I don’t really have jokes. I just tell my stupid stories and people either laugh or they don’t. I’m like “Ok, that doesn’t work”. If this was my number one thing, it would make me nervous. But it’s just for fun, so there’s no pressure and it makes me think I should have that attitude for everything that I do. Just chill out, go with the flow, and see where it goes.

Riese: Now that you’re an “out bisexual,” do you feel more allegiance to gay media than you have in the past?

Nicol: Not really, ‘cause I feel the same exact way I did before, which is that the gay community is where I feel more at home, to be honest. I just feel like —

Riese: ‘Cause they’re weirdos.

Nicol: Yeah, there’s a lot of weirdos in here. It feels exactly the same way. When I came out as bisexual I did get some “boos,” and realized that lesbians don’t like bisexuals. They think we’re spies.

Riese: Right, yeah, I know, I basically identify as bisexual and — [distracted by the look on Alex’s face] — see Alex is already giving me the “don’t talk about bisexuals” look!

Alex: I didn’t do anything just now!

Nicol: I felt the look behind my shoulder.

Alex: I promise I wasn’t even listening.

Riese: I don’t know if not listening is better than giving me the look.

Nicol: Yeah, they think we’re spies. But we can’t help it, we’re just attracted to everyone.

Riese: Bisexuals just want to take off everyone’s clothes.

Nicol: Yeah, that’s the other thing too. Like, people think bisexuals are just like, sluts.

Alex: [trying to make up for giving the Evil Bisexual look] I love bisexuals! I’ve only dated bisexuals, actually.

Nicol: Really?

Alex: Yep. So there you go, I hope that I can represent for the better of us lesbians.

Nicol: I think it’s sort of an older generation thing too. But with a younger group it’s more like, “let’s not have a problem with bisexuals, let’s have a problem with people who don’t like anyone in the LGBT community.” Let’s all bind together! Instead of leaving us out.

Riese: Or feeling like it’s not our space because we’re not completely in allegiance to one side or another.

Nicol: And we’re not spies.

Riese: No, and we’re not. There’s also the misconception that a bisexual will leave a woman for a man.

Nicol: Totally. And that insults my intelligence, you know.

Riese: The stereotypes are super, super disrespectful, as though bisexual actually means “but also likely to cheat” or something along those lines which doesn’t really make sense.

Nicol: Totally. Like, do all lesbians have toolbelts?

[pause]

Riese: Yeah. Well… kinda.

Nicol: Kind of.

Alex: Yeah.

[laughter]

Riese: Not I.

Nicol: Well, some of them are true, but…

Riese: Were [you and Erin Foley] trying to keep your relationship secret at all?

Nicol: Not really. I wasn’t shouting it from the rooftops because I don’t think it’s anybody’s business. I’m definitely a private person. I told all my friends and people that I cared about and cared about me. But I really don’t like a lot of people to know about my personal life because people are weird. We’ve had some stalkery people, they just keep showing up.

See, we publicize our shows so people will come, but when someone starts coming every time … and bringing gifts … and you know, posting everything you do on Facebook, and tagging you in all their photos…

Riese: …and you’re actually only like, in the background of the photo …

Nicol: Yeah, like it’s just the back of my head… There was one time I didn’t feel like being photographed, I just went to a play and that was up on Facebook and I’m just like “Calm down!”

Alex: The Internet’s a crazy place to be. We just talked about this with Erin as well.

Nicol: It really is! It’s like, anything you do now, everybody knows about it. You’re doing it in an auditorium.

“It’s like the most fun I’ve had with anyone in my whole life. Just morning ’til night we’re dying laughing.”

Riese: And if you actually don’t do it, still everybody can know about it too. ‘Cause people just make shit up and then people believe them. I’m actually obsessed with this right now [low embarrassed-to-admit-this voice] because of um, lindsaylohansdad and everyone talking smack abut her [back to normal voice] —  just how someone anonymous will just write something and everyone’s just like “Ah! I KNEW IT!”

Nicol: Well, yeah, I saw it in print! Gotta believe it!

Alex: It must be true!

Riese: So do you and Erin make each other laugh a whole bunch?

Nicol: Oh, God, it’s really ridiculous. I mean she’s a lunatic. She’s a total lunatic. It’s like the most fun I’ve had with anyone in my whole life. Just morning ’til night we’re dying laughing. Like going to get milk is like a stupid occurrence between the two of us. ‘Cause we’re just like “Milk, huh, you want milk?” like there’s some stupid character that comes out of it. And we’re both creative people so we can’t really get anything practical done, like looking for something she’s like “Babe, babe I can’t find my keys, babe I can’t find this, Babe, where are you, babe do you have the children? babe? babe? babe?” That’s her joke, so I’m going to give her the credit for it but it’s so true, we really cannot get anything done.

Riese: Do you help each other creatively at all?

Nicol: Yeah, which is really fun, I’ve never had a relationship where someone has helped me, they’ve always criticized me. [laughs] You know who you are. But we do the same thing but it’s also sort of different, so she comes at it from a different angle. So whatever I write, she makes better, and whatever she writes, I make it better. It’s really kinda cool and very easy.

Riese: That’s cool.

Alex: How’d you guys meet?

Nicol: We met at Logo Celesbian interviews.

Riese: Oh, at the [Julie Goldman voice] Julie Goldman Celesbian Interviews?

“I was dropping [Erin] off and so I just turned and I went in for the kiss. She got scared and turned her head and she ran away like a little girl.”

Nicol: Yeah, Julie Goldman’s thing! Erin’s interview was right after mine and I was in the makeup chair and straight and she walked in and I was like “Oh! She’s so pretty!” And then her side of things was that she couldn’t look at my eyes, and then I was like “I’m gonna stay and watch her interview.”

And then we kept bumping into each other over the next year and I saw that she was doing standup somewhere and I was like “I’m gonna go see her do standup,” and then I heard she had a crush on me and she got friends to take me out dancing, and we were dancing and one of my friends was like, “You’re ‘straight’… so you’re gonna have to put it out there with her.. to let her know that you’re interested.” And I was dropping her off and so I just turned and I went in for the kiss.

[Alex: HUGE GASP]

Nicol: (con’t): Yeah, like not like [aggressive interrobanging noise] but just like putting it out there. But she got scared and she turned her head and she ran away like a little girl.

Riese: Did you run after her like a little boy?

Nicol: No, I just said “Alright, great to see you!” But the big bad lesbian got all nervous. Then we talked for a week back and forth, I invited her to a midnight screening of Milk — I just wanted to show her I was down with the community —

Riese: Did you cry at the end of the movie?

Nicol: Yes. But I tried to hold it back. But I probably shouldn’t have, I should’ve just let that out, let her know I’m sensitive. I didn’t. And then we went on a date.

Riese: So you did consider yourself straight before then, or you were just sort of like whatever ..

Nicol: I was kind of like whatever. ‘Cause a year earlier I’d had a crush on a friend of mine so I was kind of like, “Oh, okay, well I guess this is what’s going on now..”

Riese: And then you were on the gay show.

Nicol: For me it was very individual. When I developed a crush on my friend I was like, “Oh.. I like you!” And it was never a big deal. I’m really surprised that it’s such a big deal to people, it really is. It’s never a big deal to the people going through it, it’s always a big deal to everybody else.

Riese: Yeah, but also bisexuality scares the shit out of people.

Nicol: Everybody.

Riese: And they don’t believe in it.

Nicol: Yeah, they really don’t. I think there’s a ‘B’ in LGBT, isn’t there?

Riese: Yeah there is, but they don’t really care, that’s just inserted in there to seem accepting.

Alex: Yeah they have to include you otherwise they’ll get in trouble.

Nicol: Well, no, they’re already in trouble because they don’t include us.

Alex: That’s true.

The Bisexual Flag... for real!

Riese: Luckily we have Tila Tequila.

Nicol: And we have our own flag … I like it better than the gay flag. It’s better colours, I think. It’s like magenta, like a darker pink, and then a purple. It’s coordinated.

Riese: But if we ever really did have a parade —

Nicol: We should have a parade.

Riese: We’d get a lot of shit thrown at us. And a lot of guys would be standing there going “MAKE OUT!”

Nicol: “I wanna do you BOTH!”

Riese: “I think you and your girlfriend are really hot!” .. So your Big Gay Sketch Show third season — coming out next year?

Nicol: Coming up in March, yeah.

Riese: So what are you doing with the screenplay?

Nicol: Yes. Well, I actually just finished the screenplay and I signed with the big agency so we’re going out with it in about four weeks. I was in Funny People over the summer, so I got to know some cool people from that movie and hopefully they’ll like what I wrote.

Riese: So do you feel like it’s been harder to get work now? Because of the recession?

Nicol: No, things are kind of booming, actually, because there’s so many different avenues for comedy. I just got a web deal where I’m working on different videos and I haven’t even started that yet. There’s a lot more outlets, more content, so I think it’s easier.

Julie Goldman, Nicol Paone & Kate McKinnon

Riese: Are you friends with your castmates from the Big Gay Sketch Show?

Nicol: Oh yeah. Definitely. They’re awesome, it’s a great cast, it’s a dream job. Except for the fact that it’s only ten episodes.

Riese: What are some sketches that you wanted to do that you didn’t get to do?

Nicol: That’s a good question. There was this one sketch I didn’t write it, it’s called “Bring Your Fag Hag To Work Day” and Julie Goldman and I were these fag hags and it was really funny because people at Logo brought their fag hags to work and so we were like making fun of Logo a little bit, it was really, really funny. I wanted to do a new CSI show, Dyke Drama Unit. That was pretty funny.

Riese: That would be funny on several levels too, because if you actually tried to call the police to handle actually dangerous dyke drama, they don’t care.

Nicol: I know!

Riese: And so it would be like a political message too, you know, which is always good.

Nicol: Honestly this season I got to do a lot that I wanted to do.

Riese: What is the best thing that you’re most excited about coming up?

Nicol: I got to do the voiceover for Damages, that was fun. There was this one sketch that I thought was hilarious, it was called “Guess What I Had for Lunch?” and it was all these celebrities burping in the contestant’s face and it was really funny. There’s this really cool sketch, it’s called “The Caves,” it’s basically like MTV’s Afghanistan, it’s not Cribs, it’s like The Hills but set in Afghanistan. So it’s really funny. It’s about how ridiculous those people over there are with women and women’s rights and all that stuff in a really funny and scary kind of way.

I did this Mother Theresa sketch, it’s really funny, it was based on the Christian Bale rant, and so it was like as if Mother Theresa went off on one of the nuns, and I know like, Mother Theresa’s gonna curse me, the Muslims are gonna have a fahtwa on her head. It’s like, we’re in trouble this season.

Riese: If you get a lot of people to watch Logo you guys could be in big trouble.

Nicol: I know. Thank God that, no. There are more people watching actually, we’re rated now.

Riese: We really like Logo.

Nicol: That’s great. My dad does too. My dad wears a Big Gay Sketch Show jacket around. This Italian man in New Jersey he’s like, “Yeah, my daughter’s on the show.” It’s really cute and funny.

—

Check out Nicol in Funny People, on MySpace, and on Twitter.

I’m In Love With Australian Musician Sia: Top Ten Reasons Why

The first time I had ever heard of the quirky Australian-born, NY-based singer/songwriter Sia was back in March, 2008. I had been camping out at Autostraddle Editor-in-Chief Riese’s place in New York City, and stumbled across Sia’s website while researching gig schedules in preparation for my then-annual pilgrimage to South By Southwest in Austin, TX. Also “Sia” is a weird word, which is perhaps why I hadn’t noticed Riese freaking out about how much she wanted to “see Sia” at SXSW at first.

But then I saw the website and I asked my American friends and they began to rave about a record called Some People Have Real Problems that I’d never heard of before [Riese sidenote: also Sia provided the song Breathe Me to the best series finale of all time, Six Feet Under] – weird, given that Sia is a) Australian and b) openly bisexual. I guess what I’m saying is that Sia and I are basically the same person, and so I couldn’t help feeling like I should have been familiar with her work.

Unfortunately for all of us, Sia’s South By Southwest showcase conflicted with Riese’s intense Uh Huh Her stalking schedule, and I missed out. So 18 months later when I heard that Sia was doing a tour of her homeland, I snapped up some front-row tickets.

And in short, it was everything I’d imagined and a whole lot more.

I didn’t just love her, I la-la-la-la-LOVE HER.

Sia is fun, energetic, charming, entertaining and just plain goofy. And that voice! I was born to listen to that voice!

I initially planned to write a concert review – howevs as I am concurrently reviewing the Britney Spears Lipsynching Spectacular, I thought I’d mix things up by delivering this instead:

10 Reasons Why I Love Sia, and You Should Too.

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1. Sia is an under-appreciated tweeter.

Following musicians or celebrities on Twitter isn’t for everyone, but if you happen to follow @mrskutcher or @perezhilton but not @siamusic, it’s time to re-evaluate. Sia tweets like a champ, winning my heart daily with childlike humour and feelings and bizarre observations and nonsensical musings and general randomness that – if you can dicipher their meaning – are totally endearing. And not only does she do spontaneous tweet-interviews with fans, she also exchanges tweets with all your favourite tweeps like Tegan and Sara, SamRon, Ladyhawke and even someone from BETTY.

But my favourite thing about Sia’s tweets? She is blatantly honest, meaning that any asshat who says something negative to her gets served.

2. Her video clips are AMAZING.

If you have never seen a Sia video clip before, you’ve missed out. Check out the crazy that is the video clip for her single ‘Buttons’. Go on!

3. Those costumes.

Anyone who has seen Sia perform on TV or in concert is probably aware of the costume her and the band don to open each set:

These neon gingerbreadman-esq character outfits never get old. Even though I was 100% expecting her and the band to walk out on stage in this get-up, my eyes still lit up as brightly as those neon stripes. After the opening number, her band stripped down into bright white while Sia strips down into a dress she bought “at a sample sale for 10% of the ticket price.” Girlfriend’s got thrift and style.

4. She keeps her promises.

At the beginning of the Sydney concert, Sia promised us that every item we threw on stage during her set would be tucked into her underwear. It was a little weird and unusual, sure, but we went with it. And true to her word, items were added and added to the stage – and subsequently her pants – until she was sporting a huge fake baby bump that she performed with the entire night. Inventory included:

i) Several pairs of underwear
ii) A full-length pair of denim jeans
iii) Multiple letters
iv) A pearl necklace *insert your own joke here*

I mean, that couldn’t have been comfortable. But she did it for us, and not many girls would.

5. Concert banter.

Sia engages her audience from the second she steps on stage to the moment she walks off, communicating with the same frequency and enthusiasm as those pop acts that want pre-teens to put their hands in the air like they just don’t care. Sia had me entertained the whole night and while her banter wasn’t ROTFL-hilarious, it was super cute and elicited more gaffaws from me than any other artist I’ve seen before. It’s not easy: I’m a tough crowd.

On the fan letters that were being thrown on stage: “Do you think it’s too self-indulgent to read these out loud? No? I’m going to read it… Dear Sia, I think you’re one of the only artists who… [laughs] um, let’s just say it’s nice. This is too self-congratulatory.”

On the encore: “Okay I’m going to play another song, then we’re going to leave – but don’t worry, we’re just pretending. Then we’ll come back out on stage a few minutes later to play the only song that you actually came here to hear.”

On winning the Best DVD Release at the recent ARIA Awards [Australia’s music awards] and finding that none of the photographers were interested in taking her photo: “Whatever. I’ve been on Letterman.”

6. Six Feet Under

Do you remember the final six minutes of Six Feet Under? Where Claire was driving along the freeway towards NYC, heaving as she flashed forward to significant moments in your favourite character’s future and then ultimately their deaths? Remember when your heart ached and your lip started to quiver and your eyes welled up and you reached for the Kleenex? I sure do. A lot of that emotion was fuelled by Sia, whose song “Breathe Me” soundtracked that entire scene. Everything about that scene was perfect.

7. Sia dates JD Samson from Le Tigre and MEN.

I think? I don’t usually keep up with who is dating who, but I know that JD Samson is cool and Sia is cool and together they are pretty cool. As fellow concert-goer Kate observed, it’s science.

8. She is BFFs with X-tina

How a slightly eccentric indie singer from Adelaide came to write four songs on Christina’s upcoming album, I’m no so sure. But I am counting down the days until I can get my hands on it. On stage, Sia joking called Christina a “vampire” and told a lot of BFF anecdotes that I don’t recall, but probably wouldn’t translate here anyway.

9. Some People Have Real Problems

The aforementioned Some People Have Real Problems is Sia’s fourth studio album, as well as the title that originally piqued my curiosity in this artist. I’m a captive audience for anything that is uniquely named – if I find your band name clever or unique or hilarious, I will listen to you and love you no matter what you sound like. Here’s lookin’ at you, An Horse. And obvs you, TYRA MAIL!

This album doesn’t just have an awesome name, it is awesome. My favourite tracks: “Buttons”, and “The Girl You Lost To Cocaine”. So this record didn’t quite find Sia mainstream commercial success, but if you haven’t yet heard it then it’s worthy of your time. Rolling Stone can stick their two star review. Srsly.

10. Sis is going to become Ruler of the Future

A few weeks ago Sia leaked the track ‘You’ve Changed’ from her upcoming record We Are Born, which is for release in April 2010. It’s far more uptempo than her current record and I love it! You can download the track here.

Ellen & Portia Among Gay Marriage’s Top Advocates and Bisexual Kristanna Loken Gets a Girlfriend

ELLEN & PORTIA: America’s favorite lesbian couple was on Oprah last week to celebrate Ellen’s much-anticipated O magazine cover, less than a week after Maine voted against same-sex marriage [Read: Maine & Washington Gay Marriage Election Day “Live-Blog”!]

As fierce warriors in the fight against symbolic anihilation, we’re passionate & dedicated observers of the impact Ellen & Portia have had on America’s limited & prejudicial opposition to equal rights for gay and lesbian couples. (Read: Portia on The Ellen Show)

In “A Sapphic Victory, but Pyrric,” The New York Times notes that “culture leads politics, and support for familiar, respected individuals precedes support for a larger, more abstract idea,” and wonders in light of Maine’s Question 1, when we can expect what may have been the most public display of gushingly romantic affection between two gay or lesbian celebrities, among other subersive imges and popular figures, to pay off at the polls.

Rachel Maddow and Dan Savage chime in with their opinion and Savage points out that lesbians fare better than gay men on the small screen because gay men make people think of buttsex and “They look at Ellen and they don’t know what she does with Portia.”

Read the article.

BISEXUAL: OMG! Kristanna Loken, the bisexual actress you may remember from The L Word (she played Paige, Shane’s single mom post-Carmen rebound relationship), is not with her husband anymore and for the last seven months she’s been in a relationship with a woman. This is exciting because this story always happens the other way around! Her girlfriend’s a personal trainer and you can get the full scoop here: AfterEllen interviews bisexual Kristanna Loken. Loken also dishes on the difficulties of dating women who don’t want people to “know” (cough*michelle rodriguez*) and the importance of queer visibility for equal rights.

YOUR BODY IS A WONDERLAND: John Mayer says that if you haven’t gone dancing in a gay club, you’ve never really danced. Also, you’ve never felt so sexually unwanted since that time you accidentally glanced a little too long at your best friend changing her clothes in middle school and everyone called you a dyke. Or whatever.

GAY ACRES: Planet Green, part of the Discovery Channel family, has greenlit a new show about a gay couple running a farm in upstate New York: “Their eccentric, extended friends and family dynamic reveals to viewers that trying to live the simple life isn’t so simple after all.” And also maybe that the gay life isn’t so foreign or wrong. (@variety)

CRACKS: See what happens when you comment? I look at your website, and then I find special amazing things, like the trailer for this movie, Cracks. It looks lesbionic, totally enchanting, completely creepy, and absolutely necessary. Someone tell me more.

LADY LOHAN: Lindsay Lohan tweeted this week that she is obsessed with the Bad Romance video (how weird, us too!) and would love to collaborate with Lady Gaga someday. If that ever happens, Autostraddle will probably just explode. Or find it impossible not to use all caps for a while.

New York Magazine’s Queer-Friendly Sex Diaries: Yup, They’re Real.

SEX DIARIES: We love New York Magazine‘s sex diaries for the obvious reasons but especially because they’ve included some fascinating perspectives on queerly oriented persons rarely found in mainstream magazines, such as The Female-to-Male Pre-Op Transsexual, The Royal Duchess of Slutiness, The Lesbian Player, The Bisexual Polyamorist and our favorite The Newly Lesbian Lesbian, Who Is Loving It.

They’ve often seemed just too perfect to be true — for example, The Ex-Banker Living on Alcohol, Hook-ups, and Unemployment was so on point that we suspected it was another masterminded trick by those “Dating a Banker Anonymous” Blog Hoax Gals, but Adrienne Cohen insists that indeed they are real. She even shares the process of becoming a Sex Diarist. Perhaps you will be next!

For this sex diary focused issue (the diaries are only published online, so this is their first cameo in the print mag), a NY Mag writer was forced to ‘read all 800 pages of The Sex Diaries and, using them as a source text, develop some kind of taxonomy of contemporary sexual anxities.” Among other fascinating insights he confirms that “the quality in a Sex Diary most admired by commenters is the kind of confidence (or masochism) that allows for ruthless candor.”

WEB-GEEK: Yahoo’s Geocities is closing on October 26, taking a whole bunch of data with it. That’s right — gone. FOREVER. So this is your last chance to dig into those HTML tables and extract your Ani DiFranco guitar tabs, graduation photos, Alicia Silverstone gifs and that .wav of Jim Carrey yelling “Do NOT go in there!”.  Founded in 1994, Geocities was one of the first services to offer an easy way for early Internet surfers to publish their own Web pages.

READING RAINBOW: An ex-gay group says their views are not being heard because books like You Don’t Have to be Gay are missing from libraries. Yes, these people suck, but unfortunately, it shouldn’t be any tougher for them to get their books in libraries. Book-banning is awful, and first amendment rights should apply to everyone, even if their message is hateful. Any argument that could be made against them could also be used to ban great, gay-friendly books. On the bright side, most of the ex-gay arguments are so ridiculous, they refute themselves.

Meanwhile, controversy simmers around a children’s book with Lesbian Moms … yeah so, that’s been banned from Scholastic Book Fairs:

According to the School Library Journal, Scholastic says the book, released on October 1, failed to meet its vetting process because it contains offensive language and same-sex parents of one of the main characters, Milla.

TRANS HOMECOMING QUEEN: The College of William & Mary elected their first transgender homecoming queen.

GAY MARSHAL: We’ve talked about the woman nominated to be the first gay US Marshal before, but apparently she’s been a gay pioneer for years now. Back in the ’90s, she came out big time (on the front page of the Minneapolis paper) in an effort to make her fellow police officers more tolerant. It sounds like the military is going to need some people like her once DADT is gone. (@sfchronicle)

A Tale of Two Bisexuals

THE WANTING-TO-DATE-GIRLS BISEXUAL: “The Frisky” is on a roll this week! First the scissoring girl and now good advice for a 25-year old bisexual who’s just left her male fiance and is nervous about revealing her dating history to all the judgey lesbians. Dear Wendy suggests: “If people are judging you or making you feel bad about yourself, move on to the next person!” She also adds that, “You don’t have to share every detail of your past relationship(s) (I wouldn’t recommend that at all), but doling out a few highlights … is how you build the blocks to a real relationship.” So there you go. Just be who you are and love yourself. Easy!

As a queer lady with a pretty serious history of serious and not-so-serious relationships with men, I testify that this advice-seeker’s fear is not unfounded. Well — I generally don’t/didn’t mind the scorn and teasing from my “Lesbian-Since-the-Sandbox” friends. I told myself that ’cause I’d been frolicking in semi-hysterical opportunity-rich heterosexual privilege for so many years while they’d been suffering in uber-emo alienation-rich homosexual under-privilege (this state of mind involves, we hear, fights with parents & fantasies about Dana Scully the Vampire Slayer or whatever), I could take the insults as payback for whatever hardships I’d consequentially evaded. But f*ck does it drive me crazy when my past-with-men becomes fair game for merciless critique & scorn from girls I date. Either show me The DeLorean or shut the frack up!  (@the frisky)

THE “POLYAMOROUS PUBLISHING PERSON”: New York Magazine’s Sex Diaries are kinda addictive and increasingly too good to be true, seriously. This week, PPP has a Boyfriend, another regular male lover, a Girl she Wants, and a bajillion orgasms! Also,  sometimes she says amazing things like, “Leave work early to go to Chad’s house. We fuck like our ship is going down.” (@nymag)

GENIUS GRANTS: It’s a fascinating smorgasboard of people who are doing things that are way cooler than the coolest thought you’ve ever had. “A papermaker dedicated to preserving traditional Western and Japanese techniques; a scientist developing theories of global climate change; and a journalist who helps uncover details of unsolved murders from the civil rights era are among the 24 recipients of the $500,000 MacArthur “genius awards.” (@nytimes)

NAVY GIRLS: Navy Women, Redefined: New Navy ads make questionable claims, draw on traits as “stereotypes”: “The notion of a “man’s work” is redefined in the Navy. Stereotypes are overridden by determination, by proven capabilities and by a shared appreciation for work that’s driven by hands-on skills and adrenaline.” (@sociological images)

KIDS THESE DAYS: Kirk Cameron gets it almost exactly wrong: “an entire generation [has been] brainwashed by Atheistic Evolution.”

SEXY NURSES: Top Ten Sexiest Nurses: Includes Florence Nightingale and Daryl Hannah in Kill Bill. (@nerve)

ALTERNATIVE LIFESTYLE HAIRCUT GALLERY: Girl-on-Gallery: Alternative Lifestyle Haircuts on Autostraddle dot commmm is hot, print them out and bring them to your alternative lifestyle haircutter.

Anyone But Me‘s Nicole Pacent & Rachael Hip-Flores: The Autostraddle Interview & Photoshoot

Our photoblogger Robin is preparing to shoot Nicole Pacent & Rachael Hip-Flores, the star couple of the coming-of-age lesbian-themed webseries Anyone But Me, and Nicole is fixing Rachael’s hair

when Rachael jokes, This is her other job, I’m so clueless about this stuff, and Nicole laughs in agreement, I’m always moving this one strand of hair!, and then Rachael laughs at something else, like a thought she just had, and she shares it with the group, You know what’s really funny? Every time I say Hi to you [Nicole], in a context outside of the show, and we hug, I have this instinct to like — kiss you! And I have to be like, no no, we’re not shooting —

Nicole cracks up, That is so funny, that is amazing, and it is, and so we’re all laughing. Sure, out actress Nicole Pacent has noteworthy lips and it’s arguably difficult to even speak to her without wanting to kiss her, but Rachael’s instinct likely comes from other places — like that these two bright, interesting, radiant girls, brought together by a TV show to kiss all the time, have an effortlessly comfortable friendship. After spending the afternoon talking to & photographing them, we can safely say that this genuine bond is part of what makes Anyone But Me so quietly magical.

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Daily Fix: I AM Here to Make Friends, BTW.

Guess who’s on Autostraddle today? Your MOM! JK! New York Magazine published this story called The Gay Generation Gap, and it was pretty cool, except that there were no girls in it. So we wrote our own in the Autostraddle Roundtable: Is There a Lesbian Generation Gap? With special guests Grace Chu, Haviland Stillwelly and … Riese’s MOM!

Also, um, hello, your Tuesday Televisionary gets funnier every frackin’ week. Our fave closeted lesbian (we kid, we kid!) is featured today (she was on SYTYCD) as well as shows like Better Off Ted, Nurse Jackie, Weeds and the new open-season Hot Girl of the Week.

#MICHAELJACKSON: The Ten Most Important Moments of the Michael Jackson Memorial Mess: In a chilling final moment, Jackson’s rarely-seen daughter Paris tearfully said she loved her father and that he was great. In a haunting evocation of a cycle continuing to grind on, her aunt Janet fixed her hair and dotingly but firmly told her “Speak up, honey. Speak up.” It was pretty much devastating. (@defamer)

CELEBGAYS: Everyone is so wrong, it’s like, maybe not even funny. That being said, so many gays are ding way better at slipping under the radar than we thought! I mean, why talk about the Pinkett-Smiths when you can gay-theorize  … A.C. Slater? The straightest dude EVER? The Celebrity Crowdsourced Gay List. (@gawker)

WATCH FOUR-FOUR’S I’M NOT HERE TO MAKE FRIENDS VIDEO ’09: A year ago today, I posted my supercut of people saying various iterations of “I’m not here to make friends” over and over and over again on reality TV. So much has changed since then — Obama became president, the sinking economy went belly up, Sarah Palin became queen of her own ass, then sank, then went belly up, etc. And yet, as the video (containing examples of my most favorite of televised cliches that have been uttered in the time since the first video) proves, they’ve also stayed much the same. (@fourfour)

ALSO WE ARE ALL MADE OF STARS: We’re all intersex: The persistence of intersex reminds me that there’s a continuum, that we isolate people in the middle and say they have a problem because they’re reproductively incompetent or don’t look right or whatever. None of us meet the criterion of being the perfect male or the perfect female. We are all intersex. (@salon) (more…)

Daily Fix: The End of Print, The End of The Gay Law in India, and The End of Dan Choi’s Military Career (for now.)

Autofocus! Robin Roemer & Sin Garcia present  snapshots from our NYC Pride Party Rodeo Disco! Also the deadline for buying raffle tickets is over, so look forward to news of your winnings within the next 24 hours, homsicles.

THE DEATH OF PRINT: The New York Blade, one of the two major gay & lesbian newspapers in the city, suspends publication. If the name “New York Blade” is still up for consideration, I’d like it. kthx. (@nytimes, which is still publishing itself)

THRILLER: Lisa Marie says Jackson was a passionate lover, so what was the truth about Jackson’s sexuality? (@the daily mail)

GENDERFUCK THURSDAY: Open a dictionary to “tomboy,” and you’ll find this. (@dorothy surrenders)

OH MY!: This is a really stupid (and offensive and homophobic) article in an online British publication about girls kissing girls: “So while there is a generation of young female celebrities trying to shock us (or garner media attention) by sending a message that girls can like girls, and then boys, and then girls again, what’s really disturbing is that this trend is being emulated by many of today’s teenagers.” Seriously, was someone paid to write this? And are they 16 years old? (more…)

I’ll Fiercely Advocate Your Mom

Guess what! It’s International Mix Tape Day! Or … it was. But now Laneia, Intern JK and the entire Team & Army are ready for it … and the future is bright. Speaking of the future, we sent a lady into the world of men to tell us about the Worldwide Developer’s Conference in Carlytron’s latest Nerd Alert. Also! Girl-on-Gallery – Hot Boyish Girls do Androgyny. Also if you haven’t listened to Carlytron & Riese’s hiLARIOUS visit to the Gay Pimp Podcast, you really should!

ART AGAINST h8: I’m obsessed with this and will be posting photos from it all week.

MUSIC! Del Marquis Interview (@outmagazine)

LADY GAGA! “I write about what I know: sex, pornography, art, fame obsession, drugs, and alcohol. I mean, why would anyone care to listen to me if I wasn’t an expert in what I write about?” (@elle)

POP! Stars who are totally over it. (@ohnotheydidnt)

ADAM LAMBERT: MEDIA AGAINST THE MUSIC!: Did you see Adam Lambert on 20/20? Didja, PUNK? We saw it. So, Adam Lambert is GAY! Gaygayggayayayaygagyayg. (His brother always knew it!) Sidenote: get your pants on, go to the store, buy Rolling Stone and read the article, it’s good, we la-la-love him even more today than yesterday. P.S. HE’S GAY! Watch this video! (more…)

Ex-Miss-Cali Gets In the Mix & Pink’s Been Out Since 2006

Today on Autostraddle: Stef does one of her legendary cartoon recaps about Saturday night’s Lady GaGa concert! More later.

+Ex Miss California is pro gay marriage. (@Desert Dispatch) Best part hands down of this article: “She originally began championing global warming awareness but became more interested in equal rights through meeting pageant people who supported gay rights.” You know, like the boys that did her hair!

+In The High School Comic Chronicles of Ariel Schrag, her four-part series of autobiographical graphic novels, the 29-year-old cartoonist moves year-by-year through her life as a gay teen in 1990s California, tackling puberty, friendship and coming out along the way. (ed. note: Ariel used to write for The L Word, too, when it was good and stuff.) (@npr)

Riese Rants Briefly: This “Pink is bisexual” story is driving me insane. Pink comes out as bisexual! Pink says she never said that! Who cares? Back in ’06, I was working on a book about bisexuality, and I routinely cited Pink as one of many popular actors/musicians who’s flexible sexuality had not prevented their mainstream success. We’re all too hung up on labels and linguistics — the way I see it is that Pink’s using her own words to refer to the same concept that the media is implicating when it employs the word “bisexual.” If I had the time, I’d go through all my Pink-is-“bi” sources but I don’t, so! Here’s one!

In addition to her sexy music video where she actually makes out with herself (also female), I’d like to cite this OCTOBER 2006 interview from DIVA magazine.: (more…)

Robin Shoots The Sounds (With One Smokin’ Hot Bisexual Swede)

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Daily Fix: What a show this is! Prince and Lindsay Lohan! And Ellen!

Today on Autostraddle: You’re probs all hungover from Earth Day — too much organic beer and pita will do that to you. If you haven’t already, check out Green’s special Earth Day post! And for those of you lucky enough to live in LA, Haviland’s West Coast Debutante show is tonight! Be there! More TK later this afternoon/evening …
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Baby Bisexual Lindsay Lohan sits down with American’s Top Lesbian Ellen DeGeneres on “The Ellen Show” today to talk about her breakup with SamRo and how she’s tired of rumors starting, being followed, and people saying what they want about her.

Wanna see it? Okay, here you go! Looks like Lindsay’s on The Depression Diet, proven in clinical studies to be 56% more effective than any other diet in the universe and guaranteed to make your friends and loved ones very worried about your overall health and ability to lift your own fingers.

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Meet Natalie, Our Designated Driver for Social Justice! Also. Also! Answer Her Questions!

Hi! Mooo mooo! I’m Natalie and I will be writing about …

about …

about …

(This is sort of how it goes in my head) …

… about politics and LGBT rights and feminism and women’s rights and social justice and social norms and categories. I suspect I’ll write about things that irk me, things that excite me, things that make me go “what the what?!”, things that challenge me, make me uncomfortable in my own skin, things that are pleasurable and exciting. (more…)

Flocking Together

A plan to repopulate the Blue Duck species has been foiled by the gays — the two living male Blue ducks have fallen for each other rather than for the last remaining female of the species:  “To our surprise, the two males really took to each other and it was obvious that they really liked each other. Ben and Jerry do make a lovely couple.” (@scientific american)

Read The Rachel Papers! online  – What a hot, smart, lesbian pundit means for an uneasy America! (@bitch magazine)

Iron Chef’s Cat Cora and her wife Jennifer Cora are both preggers. (@huffpo)

In Which It’s Not Gay Unless The Boobs Touch: “Just because The L Word is over doesn’t mean you’re at a loss for hot same-sex television pairings … it’s all about the tender loving care made manifest by Blair and Serena. ” (@thisrecording)

How to be an ally to a bisexual person and why I am a bisexual ally. (@bilerico project)

Did you know it was International Women’s Day on Sunday? Now you do. (@the huffington post)

Check out FOA (Friend of Autostraddle) Alexi on Episode 20 of Alexi’s Closet: Getting the Boot! (@afterellen)

[thanks to green and intern vashti!]