Header

Also.Also.Also: Megan Thee Stallion Genuinely Thought People Would Believe Her

Feature image of Megan Thee Stallion by Jason Armond / Los Angeles Times via Getty Images

Tuesday! What a concept!

Queer as in F*ck You

“My heart hurts for all the women around the world who are suffering in silence, especially if you’re a Black woman who doesn’t appear as if she needs help. So many times, people looked at me and thought, “You look strong. You’re outspoken. You’re tall. You don’t look like somebody who needs to be saved.” They assumed that, per preconceived stigmas, “I didn’t fit the profile of a victim,” and that I didn’t need support or protection.” — Megan Thee Stallion

You may have already seen parts of this essay circling online, but if you haven’t please make it your must read of the day. It’s so rare that we’re able to hear a Black woman speak about her survival with as much breadth, nuance, and abundance of care that we are able to see here. That is the majesty not only of Meg (though most certainly, of Meg!), but also of Evette Dionne, former EIC of Bitch Magazine and current Executive Editor of YES! Media. I could not imagine someone I’d trust more with Megan Thee Stallion’s words than Evette, and I’m so glad she had the opportunity to craft this “as-told-to” essay for Elle: ‘Nobody Can Take Your Power’: Megan Thee Stallion in Her Own Words

“After the new rules were approved last year, [this year’s] Boston Marathon is the first to include nonbinary runners in a newly-created division.” Boston Marathon Includes Nonbinary Qualifying Times as It Opens Registration

We talked a bit about this last week, but also Imara Jones is so important to the work of grassroots queer and trans media, she deserves her own profile so lets give her that as well! Trans Journalist Imara Jones Is One of Time’s Most Influential People of the Year

“What was said in private emails just a few years ago is now said publicly—online, in the media, and on the floors of state houses around the country.” Leaked Emails Reveal Just How Powerful the Anti-Trans Movement Has Become

Speaking of which, Missouri to Limit Gender-Affirming Care for Minors and Adults

And Also(also.also), as you already know Molly Kearney is SNL’s first nonbinary cast member, and they had a lot to say last weekend about the 14 states that have now passed bills restricting healthcare for trans kids, “I have been hung up on my genitals for far too long, and I’m starting to feel like a freaking Republican lawmaker.”

Saw This, Thought of You

Last weekend was Coachella and this is really important, I’m so glad that I read it: As Bad Bunny Headlines Coachella, Latine Locals Struggle

How the Stop Cop City Movement Inspired Angela Davis, something else that I read over the weekend and feel really grateful for!

This next article is admittedly sponcon for New Balance shoes (according to Autostraddle,popular with gays over 30), but I still really appreciated these takes: What Does Runner’s High *Actually* Feel Like? Here’s How 9 Runners Describe It

I read recently that one way to track gentrification and/or wealth in neighborhoods is too pull up a map of Trader Joes, and this article isn’t about that — but thematically it’s similar. I’m really fascinated by the ways that we can see and map out wealth that isn’t directly tied to only dollar signs or income, but also by culture shifts. “In the last decade the Chicago Park District has removed 12 of 16 basketball courts from neighborhoods that have doubled and tripled in value, further marginalizing communities facing displacement.” A Case of Disappearing Hoops in Gentrifying Neighborhoods

The Broad, Vague RESTRICT Act Is a Dangerous Substitute for Comprehensive Data Privacy Legislation. “This bill is being called a ‘TikTok ban,’ but it’s more complicated than that. The bill would give more power to the executive branch and remove many of the commonsense restrictions that exist under the Foreign Intelligence Services Act and the Berman Amendments.”

Political Snacks

I am still so angry about this, I can’t talk about it without shaking. What We Know About the Shooting of Ralph Yarl

Also.Also.Also: The Time 100 Just Dropped, Lets See Who’s All Gay and Trans Here?

It’s been the 80s for the last two days and I have left to go outside into the sun for both of them. The dopamine hit of Mother Nature is actually unreal.

Queer as in F*ck You

Left to Right, various red carpet photos new: Drew Barry, Aubrey Plaza, Brittney Griner, and Imara Jones. All four are new lesbian, bisexual, or trans Time 100 2023 inductees.

Left to Right: Drew Barrymore by Taylor Hill/WireImage, Aubrey Plaza by Robert Smith/Patrick McMullan via Getty Images, Brittney Griner by Johnny Nunez/Getty Images for BET, and Imara Jones by Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images

The 100 Most Influential People of 2023. New Time 100 just dropped! Let’s see who all’s gay and trans here! We have:

  • Drew Barrymore

  • Aubrey Plaza
  • Brittney Griner (written by Sue Bird!) — “[Getting Brittney home] speaks to the power of the women who rallied around her—Black women, members of the LGBTQ+ community, our WNBA community—and who made certain her name was never forgotten, that she’d return home. These are the women who get sh-t done.”
  • Imara Jones (written by Tourmaline
! And honestly probably the best written blurb on the list) — “In a moment when anti-trans violence is on the rise and there are those seeking to legislate us out of existence, Imara’s work declares loudly and proudly not just that we get to have a future, that our aliveness deserves to extend beyond this moment.”
  • Sarah Kate Ellis, the present and CEO of GLAAD, in case you didn’t recognize her name.
  • Jerrod Carmichael. Listen OK, I know we don’t always include cis gay men, but I love Jerrod so much.

(Also, Zoe Saldaña’s profile is written by Mila Kunis. IYKYK. Ahem.)

This All-Trans Soccer Team Just Had a Major Victory

Two Transgender Rights Cases Will Be Heard by Full U.S. Appeals Court. “The cases, out of North Carolina and West Virginia, both involve health insurance coverage for treatment commonly sought by transgender people.”

Margaret Cho Wants Trans People As Disney Princesses, Princes & Leads

Inside the Queer Cumbia Parties Affirming LGBTQ Latines Across the Country

Saw This, Thought of You

8 Things Productivity Experts Would Never, Ever Do Before Work. Ok the title is a little click-baity, but I found this list to be both practical and surprisingly soothing? Maybe you will, too!

This whole ordeal has been bananas. NPR Quits Twitter After Being Labeled as ‘State-Affiliated Media’

What, Exactly, Does ‘Tough On China’ Mean? “Democrats and Republicans disagree on a lot of issues. But there’s a growing consenus in both parites that China represents a threat to the U.S. And some worry that the rise in anti-China rhetoric could pave the way for xenophobia against Asian-Americans.”

What to Do When Someone Is Having a Panic Attack

Political Snacks

I know that we talk about this often, but seeing it laid out on a map like this honestly startled me:

Florida Legislature Passes Six-Week Abortion Ban. “The prohibition would be among the most restrictive in the country, and Florida would no longer be a destination for people from across the Deep South seeking the procedure.”

And on that subject, Abortion Pill Remains Available For Now — But Not by Mail (and related to that! What to Know About Misoprostol-Only Abortion)

Also.Also.Also: According to Latest Study, Insomnia Is Queer Culture

This is going to be very quick and dirty, to the point, because it’s 9pm and I cannot believe I am still here in front of a computer, but here we are!!

I hope you’ve had a better day than I’ve had.

Queer as in F*ck You

Gay Youths Are More Than Twice as Likely to Have Sleep Trouble, Study Finds. Upon sharing this link, our Senior Editor Heather proclaimed, “insomnia is queer culture! I knew it!” And friends, she is not wrong!! In a study that looks at young teens — 35.1% of those who identified as gay, lesbian or bisexual reported trouble falling or staying asleep, compared to 13.5% of straight-identifying adolescents. Adding to those numbers, 30.8% of young people in that age group — those who answered “maybe” to being gay, lesbian or bisexual — reported problems with sleep as well.

Granted I’m a queer adult, but I feel incredibly confident in anecdotally saying those sleep problems don’t go away with gay age! (This also reminds me, have you ever read my magnum opus? “Go The F*ck To Sleep!” 8 Ways to Kick Insomnia’s Ass)

https://twitter.com/RozKaveney/status/1644660022540894210?s=20

Rest in eternal peace Rachel Pollack, please take time tonight to read Don’t Call Me Mister You Fucking Beast, originally published in 1972.

Speaking of which, The Day Philly’s Radical Lesbians Took on City Hall. “The radical feminist group Dyketactics was beaten up in Philadelphia in 1975 and subsequently sued the city for police brutality.”

Lorraine Hansberry’s Family Says Chicago’s Racist Policies Seized Their Land. Now They’re Seeking Reparations. “Nearly 65 years after the Broadway playwright’s property lawsuit against the city, her family is continuing the fight to reclaim not only their land, but their legacy.”

There’s No Road Map for an Aging Lesbian. “Where is the script for growing gray and staying gay?”

Just making sure you heard that Brittney Griner is writing a memoir.

Saw This, Thought of You

World’s Shortest Dog Is a Chihuahua Living in US. It’s Tinier Than a Popsicle Stick

Sunday was Easter and I can’t stop thinking about this beautiful piece by Taylor Crumpton for Essence, Easter Fashion Sunday Is Black Culture

The Long Covid Revolution. “Millions of American adults are impaired by long Covid. They have a vision for what our society owes to chronically ill and disabled people.”

This New Magazine Aims to Be a Home for the Black Left. “The thousands who were mobilized by George Floyd’s murder need a place to debate strategy and stay engaged. Hammer & Hope wants to be just that.”

Political Snacks

A Conservative Christian Judge Rules Against Medication Abortion. How Hard Will Democrats Fight Back? (and related: Will the Supreme Court Uphold an Abortion-Pill Ban?)

Did the Biden Administration Just Help Trans Athletes—Or Legitimize Their Exclusion? You’re smart, I bet you can guess.

And One Final Thing

Yesterday was the WNBA Draft, and while it wasn’t at the same levels of bb butch fashion as past years, there was still drip to be had. May I present you with Jordan Horston, formerly of the University of Tennessee Lady Vols and future guard of the Seattle Storm?

Also.Also.Also: Bud Light Affirms Trans Influncer Dylan Mulvaney’s Right to Secure That Beer Sponcon Bag

The days are getting longer! The sun was still out when I started this! Wheeeeee! 🤸

Queer as in F*ck You

Bud Light Defends Partnership With Trans TikTok Star Dylan Mulvaney and Kid Rock Shoots Bud Light Cans After Company Partners With Transgender Woman. This is normally not something I’d take interest in, to be completely honest! But the discourse around this over the last few days has been fascinating to me. So first, Bud Light recently partnered with Dylan Mulvaney — an actress who’s previously appeared in Broadway productions of The Book of Mormon, Legally Blonde, and Bye Bye Birdie; but is most famous for easily being one of the largest LGBT+ influencers on TikTok — to promote the company’s March Madness contest to her 10.8 million followers across social media platforms. I believe there’s also a custom beer with her face on it? But back on topic! In the video, Mulvaney appears dressed as Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany’s and identifies herself as a “Bud Light Partner.”

https://www.instagram.com/reel/CqgTftujqZc/

Of course, this marketing sparked backlash among conservatives (who are apparently so passionate about their beer?? AMERICA! 🇺🇸🦅). That includes a different Instagram video of Kid Rock wearing a MAGA hat — naturally, of course — and shooting several cans of Bud Light to express his righteous anger! Meanwhile, much more interestingly, it’s also brought up all this really dope queer history of Bud Light that dates back to 1977 when Bud Light was often the default cheap beer at gay bars after labor unions and LGBT groups jointly organized a boycott of Coors to protest Coors’ practice of forcing employees to take polygraph tests that included questions about their sexual orientation (a story that involves thee Harvey Milk himself!)

Ok so to wrap this up, in a statement to BuzzFeed News Anheuser-Busch (the owners of Bud Light) stood by its partnership with Mulvaney, saying: “Anheuser-Busch works with hundreds of influencers across our brands as one of many ways to authentically connect with audiences across various demographics.” And I hope everyone uses this opportunity to read: Bud Light Is the Dykiest Domestic Lager — Change My Mind by our Managing Editor Kayla Kumari, published just last year.

And on to other queer news!

Queer Community in the South Is Worth Fighting For. “People discredit us and they discredit our state, but this is my home; why should I leave my home?”

The Lesbian Bar Isn’t Dead. It’s Pouring Orange Wine in Los Angeles. “Two recent openings testify to the power, and joy, of queer spaces.”

What’s at Stake for Trans Latines as States Ban the Term “Latinx”

Saw This, Thought of You

Reggaeton Has a Color Blindness Problem. “In a recent Time profile, Bad Bunny was asked about colorism and anti-Blackness in reggaetón. His response was less than ideal.” (If you’re fan of Benito, this is a necessary read.)

Angel Reese, Angela Bassett, and the Unfair Standards of ‘Professionalism’

The Unbearable Costs of Becoming a Writer, this is a little inside baseball if you aren’t in media, but it’s meant a lot to everyone I know who’ve read it.

Parasocial Relationships Are Just Imaginary Friends for Adults. hahahaha, what a headline!

Idaho Just Made Up a New Class of Abortion Crimes. I hate it, thanks.

Political Snacks

I am going with Natalie on this one, “Imagine if people had just believed Anita Hill.” Clarence Thomas Secretly Accepted Luxury Trips From Major GOP Donor. “The undisclosed gifts to Thomas have no known precedent in the modern history of the Supreme Court.”

(And alt headline on the above that made me laugh, Clarence Thomas Broke the Law and It Isn’t Even Close)

Supreme Court Lets Transgender Girl Stay on School Track Team. It’s the first time SCOTUS has acted on a wave of anti-trans state restrictions in sports.

Brandon Johnson Appears To Win Chicago Mayor’s Race, congratulations to the progressive coalition that came together for this to happen!

And in much worse news, Tennessee House Expels First of Three Democrats Who Joined Gun-Control Protests.

The Dangerous Fantasy of Trump’s Indictment. “Why the circus surrounding his arrest may do more harm than good.” Listen if I’m gonna do one thing, it’s always remind you to read Rebecca Traister.

Also.Also.Also: Oh Trump Got Indicted

Today was sunny, I think I’m finally getting over my cold (I can breathe out of both nostrils! And take a deep breath in without feeling like my chest is going to cave! But I will miss the Robitussin daydreams!), I went for a walk outside, and more important than any of those things… today is the day that Donald Trump got indicted.

Queer as in F*ck You

“This evening we contacted Mr. Trump’s attorney to coordinate his surrender…”

Grand Jury Indicts Donald Trump in New York, First Time a Former President Is Charged Criminally. The precise charges are not yet known, but the case is focused on a hush-money payment to Stormy Daniels during his 2016 campaign.

I’d like to tell you a story about a Cheeto. One lonely, small, insignificant Cheeto. When I asked our office today what photo could we use today, pretty quickly we all felt that Cheetos was the only appropriate choice. But which one? I had suggested a bowl of Cheetos perhaps? Something that was immediately recognizable. But no. That was not small enough.

A single. Tiny. Cheeto.

And may this indictment be the first of many. (An Update: Donald Trump is expected to turn himself in and face arraignment on Tuesday, according to one of his lawyers. What a fucking day.)

These Photos Explore Queer Latine Youth Culture in LA

The DEA’s New Telehealth Rules Are Bad News for Trans People on Testosterone. “The new rules may make it harder to prescribe controlled substances via telehealth.”

The Affordable Care Act’s Biggest Gender-Based Protections Are Under Threat. “The Texas-based case examines the ACA’s guarantee that preventive medicine be fully covered. It could affect coverage of PrEP, breastfeeding counseling, STI screening and contraception.”

Speaking of those previous two news items, there’s a 24 hour TikTok-a-thon that’s being hosted by trans creators to raise money for trans healthcare, and I cannot imagine a better way to put your money where your mouth is this Trans Day of Visibility.

Saw This, Thought of You

1st Over-The-Counter Opioid Overdose Treatment Gets FDA Approval. “Drug overdoses are currently the leading cause of accidental deaths in the U.S., with a majority involving opioids.”

“If you’re one of the heavy bleeders, women who have fibroids or are premenopausal, the state will not provide you any extra items. You must purchase them. We aren’t paid to work in Texas. And nothing is free in prison.” (This one has been staying with me all day.) Prisons Use Menstruation as a Form of Punishment

For my Yellowjackets hive, buzz buzz buzz: Tawny Cypress Is a True Jersey Girl

Political Snacks

Democrats Reintroduce Federal Trans Bill of Rights as GOP Tries to Advance Restrictions. “The reintroduced Trans Bill of Rights declares that the federal government has a duty to protect trans and nonbinary people.”

Also.Also.Also: Wizards of Waverly Place Showrunner Says “It’s Obvious” Selena Gomez’s Character Was Bisexual, 11 Years Later

Hi! STOP SCROLLING! If you’re going to read one thing today, it should be this piece about the shooting in Nashville by Nico Hall for us: Conservatives Will Try to Paint Trans People as Violent Extremists, We Cannot Let Them

Now, here’s what else is in the news….

Queer as in F*ck You

‘Wizards of Waverly Place’ Showrunner Says Selena Gomez’s Character Was Bisexual: ‘It Was Quite Obvious’. To get into even more detail, Alex was supposed to have a relationship with Stevie (that’s Lesbian Jesus Hayley Kiyoko to you). Ok the thing is that there’s a long history of characters who were “supposed to be gay” but never get said until many years after the fact, which can be a little eye roll worthy, for sure. In fact it’s such a common trope that we even wrote a whole list about it! But depending on your age when Wizards first aired and/or your affinity for peak Disney Channel, this one does feel little special. And to celebrate the special occasion, may I offer you: All Disney Stars Are Gay Now, We Don’t Make the Rules

^^^ there may or may not be a shout out to Selena Gomez in that article, I’m not saying.😉

Ugh, we’ve gone so far as to ban singing Rainbow Connection from The Muppets in preschools now? really?

Powerful Photos of Butch Lesbian Identity. “Photographer Roman Manfredi travelled around the UK documenting the lives of working-class butches, studs and the femmes who love them.”

This study from The Washington Post is absolutely vital, and I’m really glad they removed the paywall from it: Most Trans Adults Say Transitioning Made Them More Satisfied With Their Lives

Send a Message of Support to Incarcerated Transgender People. “Incarceration can be extremely isolating and dehumanizing for everyone, but especially for trans people. In partnership with Black & Pink, we’re sending messages of hope and strength to incarcerated trans people to let them know we are in solidarity with trans liberation and justice.” (I can not speak enough praises for Black & Pink, please please consider doing this)

Saw This, Thought of You

Cruz Miguel Ortíz Cuadra, 67, Face of Puerto Rican Culinary History, Dies. Am I always gonna fit a little Puerto Rico into these round ups? I gotta do me. (que descansa en paz.)

“‘We don’t have access to abortion in Louisiana right now unless you’ve had a miscarriage … As a student, ‘you’re not going to be seeing this procedure very often. You’re not getting enough practice in that procedure.’” As Restrictions Complicate Abortion Training in Medical Schools, Papayas Are Filling a Gap

Extremely relevant, “The U.S. maternal-mortality rate spiked in 2021, according to a new report from the CDC. The report reveals that 1,205 women died of maternal causes in 2021, a 40 percent increase from 2020 and the highest rate the country has seen since the 1960s.” The U.S. Maternal-Mortality Rate Soared in 2021

Abortion Wins Elections — “The fight to make reproductive rights the centerpiece of the Democratic Party’s 2024 agenda.” (I’ll be honest that I sneaking this in, because I haven’t had a chance to sit and read it in the attention that I want yet. But it’s Rebecca Traister in a cover story for New York Magazine writing about the political efficacy of how we talk about abortions, and that matters A LOT to me. Okay. If you enjoy incredibly smart, detailed feminist  analysis of electoral politics, it should matter a lot to you, too.)

Political Snacks

Intersex Surgery Is Condemned by the United Nations. Anti-trans Bills Are Allowing It. “Exemptions for intersex surgery allow doctors to assign minors who are born with secondary sex characteristics as ‘male’ or ‘female,’ reinforcing rigid gender ideals and heterosexuality, experts say.”

Crowds in Milan Protest Against Curbs on Rights of Same-Sex Parents

Uganda to Jail People Who Identify as LGBTQ in One of World’s Most Anti-Gay Laws

And Relevant to All Our Interests, One More F*cking Thing

Also.Also.Also: Anne Hathaway, Michaela Coel To Play Pop Star/Designer Girlfriends in New A24 Film “Mother Mary”

Feature image of Anne Hathaway by Marc Piasecki/WireImage, Michaela Coel by Mike Marsland/WireImage

I saw this quote today on the Well Read Black Girl Instagram account, and immediately it’s become a mantra:

“i knew i was healing when i cared
about off-time as much as i did my
work. i make space for joy by
refusing to always be a
on.
i spend
time with people where it’s easy
being myself. this is growth.” — Yasmine Cheyenne

Wishing you all a bit of peace from always being “on” this Tuesday.

Queer as in F*ck You

I don’t always do TV/Film announcements in this news round up, but some news is too big to wait: Anne Hathaway, Michaela Coel to Star in David Lowery’s Pop Epic ‘Mother Mary’ for A24. And why is this relevant to our interests? I’m so glad you asked! The “epic pop melodrama” will follow “a fictional musician (Hathaway) and her relationship with an iconic fashion designer (Coel).”

So what we are talking about here is Anne Hathaway, as a pop star, dating THEE Michaela Coel, as a fashion designer, from the same studio that brought my most recent gay favorite Bodies, Bodies, Bodies (and yes, I was late on the BBB train! Don’t judge! But IF that is also you, please join me!). It’s about to burn all the film girlies on Letterboxd to the ground. In addition to Anne Hathaway and Michaela Coel on screen together, Charli XCX will write and produce original songs for the project. Cannot wait. This movie will be my entire personality.

Let’s see about some other news, shall we?

Black Queer History Is American History. It’s facts.

Hockey Isn’t for Everyone. Some Women and LGBTQ People on Twitter Are Pushing to Change That.

Mira Bellwether Fought for a World Where Trans Women Know Love and Pleasure. Mira Bellwether’s work continues on, but she is so, so missed. Ro also wrote a tribute to her at her passing.

Saw This, Thought of You

Vogue analyzed all shows and presentations on Vogue Runway for Spring 2023 to determine the level of size inclusive representation, and the results are dismal, but the charts are so pretty.

Speaking of fashion nerds! The “influencer” angle in the opener here took me a few eye-rolls to get through, but it is true that Parade is a favorite underwear of Autostraddle writers and I was curious about it’s pivot off the internet and into Target, officially becoming mainstream. There’s also some interesting reflections on underwear as the currency of “internet cool” and celebrity brands (Kim Khardasian/Skims, Lizzo/Yitty, etc). Do Those Free Panties Make You Feel Good About Yourself?

Big week for fashion news! (sorry everyone else, I’m sure we’ll be back to normal business on Thursday) What Fashion Loses As Law Roach Retires

Ugh.. what did it seem like? The Rise of Gender-Neutral Names Isn’t What It Seems

Political Snacks

Wyoming Bans Transgender Youth From Girls’ Sports Teams and Missouri to Restrict Gender-Affirming Care for Minors

But also, Gov. Whitmer’s Lesbian Daughter Stood By Her Mother’s Side While She Signed the Bill for LGBTQ+ Protections in Michigan. Excuse me, just extremely proud of my home state.

And One More Thing

Have you been following the #TransRightsReadathon? From March 20-27, across all social media platforms, book lovers are reading books by trans authors and raising money for trans orgs.

Also.Also.Also: Please Let Queer People Grow Old

I wasn’t able to get a news round up out on Tuesday because we were busy prepping for our fundraiser (ahem, we need at least $175k to make it to Pride! Please HELP!), so you’re getting an extra long one today. I missed you!

Queer as in F*ck You

Queer People Grow Old, Too. From Heather: “there’s some amazing photos in here.” ❤️

When Parents Are the Activists: Pflag Celebrates 50 Years of LGBTQ Advocacy

As Queer Spaces Return to “Normal,” Disabled LGBTQ+ People Are Being Left Behind

HAHAHAAA. Whew. Let me catch my breath. Protesters Rally Against a Non-Existent Drag Event. “People stood outside an empty pub in East Dulwich, south London, on Friday morning.”

We/Us Is the Uk’s First Visual Art Project Celebrating Butches and Studs From Working Class Backgrounds

Wellesley Students Voted to Admit Nonbinary Applicants and Trans Men. The College President Says It Still Won’t Let Them Enroll.

Oh I’m sorry. Shut thee fuck up. Is that Autostraddle Culture Editor Shelli Nicole INTERVIEWING JANELLE MONÁE!?! Have I stopped screaming about it? Understandably, no I have not. How Janelle Monáe Is Reviving the Harlem Renaissance in Brooklyn

Megan’s Rule: Being Exceptional Doesn’t Make You the Exception. “It felt like the December 2022 trial of Tory Lanez sparked a divide in hip-hop, but it just stoked the flames of a 50-year-long battle for Black women to be heard. In the first episode of our new season, we take you into Megan Thee Stallion’s testimony to unpack the impact of misogynoir on rap.” — Definitely a podcast episode worth listening to.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Zaya Wade (@zayawade)

Zaya Wade’s very first magazine cover is here!! 🥺 And she looks stunning. But you should stay for the section a the end of the interview where she answers questions from other trans teens. 🥺 Zaya Wade’s Gender Resistance

The Woman Shaking Up Italian Politics (No, Not the New Prime Minister). “Daughter of Italian and Jewish American parents, Elly Schlein wants to remake the center-left opposition to Giorgia Meloni, if only her party can survive it.” I do feel like I should say outright that the article is from the NYT, but also it’s a cool thing to know and I’m wishing Elly Schlein all the best.

Saw This, Thought of You

“Like every bisexual who has ever existed, I used to love Brendon Fraser. I have followed his return to Hollywood closely. I remember the profound sadness I felt when I learned about the reasons he left, and feeling such softness towards him as he began working again. Especially because he returned to this very image-conscious industry as a fat man. Everything I have ever read about him suggests that he a good, kind person.

So it is actually astonishing to me how all of the suffusing, gentle warmth and affection and admiration I had for Brendon Fraser has utterly vanished. A fellow fat friend called it “complicity,” and I am inclined to agree. It felt so ghoulish and frankly kind of insane to watch him stand up there and make an acceptance speech on the back of a project that participates so fully in the dehumanization of an entire category of human beings6.

And it’s hard for me to say this! Because he is, by all accounts, a good and kind person, and has had a triumphant return to the industry after this awful thing happened to him. And his response to his win left him visibly overwhelmed with genuine emotion. I am not a monster. I get it. It gives me no pleasure to disrupt the comeback narrative. But I cannot live with myself pretending it is any other thing. Forget how you can’t put lipstick on a pig—you can!—you can’t put lipstick on an open fucking wound.”

When Whales Fly. Carmen Maria Machado on The Whale and fatness was one of my must reads of the week. (Similarly, you can also read: The Whale Is Not a Masterpiece — It’s a Joyless, Harmful Fantasy of Fat Squalor, which CMM also links to in her piece)

Ok and this is my last Oscars link, the week is over, but it’s by Angelica Jade Bastién so you know it’s goooood: The Self-Possession of Angela Bassett

Nora Ephron’s Revenge

Longtime readers of this column will know that I used to be a The View faithful, dating back to childhood, and when this first dropped it took a lot of self-restraint not to read it all right away in the middle of my workday: Let’s Talk Barbara Walters. “Seventeen leading broadcasters on her legacy and making their way in the world she made.”

So You Began Your Event With an Indigenous Land Acknowledgement. Now What? “Statements recognizing indigenous rights to territories seized by colonial powers may be well-meaning. But some indigenous leaders fear these acknowledgements may become routine and performative.” Correct.

You Should Be Outraged About Silicon Valley Bank

This comes from one our crossword puzzle creators, Rachel, and I personally think it’s really great: “I thought the might be interested in our annual crossword fundraiser for abortion funds — please check it out/share if you feel so moved!” These Puzzles Fund Abortion

Political Snacks

A New Supreme Court Case Could Be the Most Important Transgender Rights Decision Ever. “And it arrives at the Supreme Court at an absolutely horrible time.” — that last part didn’t really need to be said, we all know.

I remember first including this story in a recent round up, I had no idea she was still going! Incredible. A Nebraska Legislator Is 3 Weeks Into a Filibuster Over a Trans Bill. “‘I will burn the session to the ground over this bill,’ state Sen. Machaela Cavanaugh said of a bill that would ban gender-affirming therapies for minors.”

How Far-Right Movements Die. Amen.

Also.Also.Also: The Butches Are Back (In Style) (They Never Went Away)

This is such a specific craving, but I want a warm bowl of popcorn and chocolate chip cookies? Why? I do not know!

Queer as in F*ck You

This is such excellent headline work. Tell Me About It, Stud: The Rapturous Return of the Butch Lesbian Scene “With sold-out club nights from Bristol to Birmingham, a long-marginalised subculture is enjoying a brilliant post-pandemic resurgence.” — I sincerely loved this trend piece! (Obviously I don’t agree with “post-pandemic” but beyond that, I mean). It’s about the lesbian and queer party scene in the UK, but also takes you through the history of the word butch in the United States, and really it just all comes together so well. Anytime I get to love on some butches, it’s a good day for me. It’s your must read of the day!

https://www.instagram.com/p/Cpie2ZzPoUM/

“I always say freedom ain’t free, meaning you still have to deprogram yourself. We’re working in a world where the first response to queerness, or to trans, or to nonbinary is to question its existence or if it’s real, because [people have] been taught heteronormative ways of living. Traditional gender roles are what we see mostly in the media. It’s still shocking when a celebrity comes out as gay. We still live in that kind of world. We live in a world where they’re creating laws that even take out us talking about slavery, that take out us talking about LGBTQIA+ communities — like, literal erasure of our existence is continuing to happen. As upsetting as that is, I try not to allow that part of the world to make me hard, to make me cold, to make me evil. I have to actively give myself mantras and call my therapist about it, talk to people in my community. Community, for us, is everything. To peacefully deal with those sorts of obstacles and find joy, steal joy — it takes daily practice.”

I AM SCREAMING ABOUT THIS HERE QUEER NONBINARY BLACK EXCELLENCE!!! That’s thee Tre’vell Anderson interviewing thee Janelle Monáe for Ebony f*cking Magazine: Inside Janelle Monáe’s Queerest and Freest Era Yet. If you know anything about the history of Black media in the United States, you know Ebony Magazine, an institution and cornerstone. Anytime our institutions center Black queerness in all of its glory (including having a Black nonbinary talent being interviewed by a Black nonbinary writer) — what did I say? I will not stop screaming about it.

There aren’t enough words in the English language for how much I hate this with every bone of my Black feminist body. Alice Walker Defends J.K. Rowling’s Transphobia.

RuPaul Slams  Lawmakers for Legislation Banning Drag Shows. “The Emmy-winning entertainer spoke out in a video against bans and restrictions on drag shows.” That took long enough!

Saw This, Thought of You

A World Without Men. “The women of South Korea’s 4B movement aren’t fighting the patriarchy — they’re leaving it behind entirely.”

I’ve been saying this!! Why ‘Poker Face’ Is the Most Stylish Show on Television Right Now

Grieving On Social Media Made Me Lonelier Than Ever

(Damn. I’m an only child and even I felt the attack) Are You Okay Or Are You An Eldest Daughter?

Haiti’s national women’s soccer team has qualified for the Women’s World Cup!! Haitian Women Make Soccer History

Political Snacks

Now, here’s this week’s round up of terrible news from state legislatures:

Speaking of which, Massive Cache of Leaked Emails Details Coordination Between Anti-trans Groups, Politicians. “Thousands of emails sent and received by conservative lawmakers, activists, doctors, and attorneys that reveal the inner workings of a national anti-trans movement have been leaked online.”

And One More Thing

New Lucy Dacus dropped! with Jasmin Savoy, Phoebe Bridgers, ER Fightmaster, and drag queens! (We have something coming on this that I think you will enjoy)

Also.Also.Also: Gay Campground in Florida Presents the Question Is It Time We All Finally Become Land Dykes

Sorry this link round up is late today! We’ve been busy celebrating our 14th birthday! Autostraddle. The little dyke site that could.

Queer as in F*ck You

I got a present for you, Inside Sawmill, Florida’s Premier Gay Campground. “I went for a weekend in the woods, but I found queer family instead.” I feel like we get so much hard news that involves Florida, let’s take a minute to celebrate some radical queer joy in the state instead? Queer and trans people are everywhere, in every inch of this country, and we are not leaving our family behind. Period.

Bisexuals Are the ‘Invisible Majority’ in LGBTQ America.

WWE star proposed to her girlfriend, Toni Cassano, just after Valentine’s Day, and she did an interview with Out about it: Sonya Deville Dishes on Her Coming Out Journey & Proposal to Toni Cassano

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Zaya Wade (@zayawade)

Zaya Wade Walks 1st Runway Show, Begins Era as a Fashion Girlie (I’m so happy for her)

Students Switch up College Plans as States Pass Anti-LGBTQ Laws. “Students, parents and college counselors say some LGBTQ youth are choosing not to attend colleges in states that have passed legislation targeting their rights.” (On one hand, good? everyone should take into account their basic rights when deciding where is best for them to live for four years at time? BUT ALSO! No one should have to make decisions like this based on their safety, and lots of people don’t have the privilege to “choose” where they go to school in the first place and they are equally as valuable, and this entire country is fucked — we can’t just write off entire blocks of states and pretend that solves anything… it does not. Many thoughts!)

Georgina Beyer, World’s First Openly Transgender Member of Parliament Has Died. Friends shared that Beyer died peacefully in hospice care.

Saw This, Thought of You

https://twitter.com/carmencitaloves/status/1632488168904613891

I have been SEETHING. Chris Rock Has More to Say About Jada Pinkett Smith

To quote Natalie, “This is some bullshit.” Girls Hoops Team Beats Boys, Denied Title Anyway

The World Mourns the Passing of Judy Heumann, Disability Rights Activist

Political Snacks

This has left me sick to my stomach for two days now. CPAC Speaker Urges Eradication of Trans Rights and The Odds Are Getting Worse for Trans Americans. “Hundreds of anti-trans bills have been introduced. The few that have become law are laying the groundwork for further discrimination.” (and also this, too: Tennessee Governor Signs First-Of-Its-Kind Bill Restricting Drag Shows)

Also.Also.Also: On Aubrey Plaza’s Lasting Reign and the Legacy of “Moody, Deadpan Latinas”

Feature Photo of Aubrey Plaza and Jenny Ortega by by Michael Buckner/Variety via Getty Images

Have you heard of molletes? Because they are my secret weapon of vegetarian sandwiches (I do mine without the fried egg that’s on top in this recipe) that feel hefty enough for dinner and I had to share.

Saw This, Thought of You

Please understand, I am extremely here for it. In Praise of Jenna Ortega, Aubrey Plaza and Moody, Deadpan Latinas. Suzy Exposito is a favorite writer of mine, her piece about growing up a goth Latina in Miami (it’s linked in the essay above) is one I return to often to remember just why I do this kind of writing. Anyway, I’ve thought a lot about this for the last few months now, ever since Aubrey Plaza’s grand return to the front of pop culture consciousness this fall seemingly overlapped with Wednesday’s rise for Jenna Ortega, I but couldn’t figure out how to put it into words?

“Although Ortega’s sullen interpretation of teen Wednesday can be directly linked back to that of Christina Ricci, who played the character in the 1991 film ‘The Addams Family,’ Ortega’s affect as ‘Wednesday’ also calls back an earlier model of Latina malaise: Aubrey Plaza as the character April Ludgate in the 2000s comedy ‘Parks and Recreation.”

There are so many legacies that we are only just now getting to build, as Latinas (and also for Plaza, as queer people), because we weren’t here before. We weren’t able to build tropes — and not stereotypes! because there is a difference! — of our own making, in our own name? And something about watching traces of Aubrey Plaza in Jenna Ortega happen in real time is just… chilling. In the best of ways.

Speaking of pop culture legacies! Judy Blume Goes All the Way. “A new generation discovers the poet laureate of puberty.”

Queer as in F*ck You

OK — a little pride for my home state for a second, however! So much of the news we get on the state legislature level about LGBTQ rights is awful, how about some good news for once? Michigan State Senate Passes Bill to Protect LGBTQ Rights

But I do have a round up of those other kinds of state news, too:

But we’re still here, we’re still queer, and fighting back: Students Across Iowa Take Part in Walkouts to Protest LGBTQ Bills

Transgender Athlete JayCee Cooper Wins Discrimination Case Against USA Powerlifting. (Oh you’re interested in trans strength training? Have you read Stef Rubino’s work yet?)

“I rely on Black queer feminist models of community and kinship to determine how I will raise my children and build community around them. As bell hooks writes in All About Love: New Visions, ‘Capitalism and patriarchy together, as structures of domination, have worked overtime to undermine and destroy this larger unit of extended kin.'” What Monogamy Misses by Dr. Jenn M Jackson, for Yes!

Political Snacks

ICYMI, “Lightfoot, the first Black woman and out LGBTQ+ person to lead Chicago, has failed to make an April runoff, with challengers Paul Vallas and Brandon Johnson moving on.” Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot Loses Reelection Bid

Iran Investigates Poisoning of Hundreds of Schoolgirls With Toxic Gas. “Many Iranians believe the toxic gas poisonings are a deliberate attempt to force schools to close.”

UN Urged to Intervene Over Destruction of Us Abortion Rights. “Exclusive: letter from human rights groups says overturning of the constitutional right violates US’s obligations as a UN member state.” As it fucking should.

Also.Also.Also: Brittney Griner Really Seems to Be Doing Well? It’s Hard Not to Get Emotional

Feature photo of Brittney Griner, Cherelle Griner, and Queen Latifah by Amy Sussman/Getty Images

It’s 9pm and I’m still at work! So that’s how it’s going! (I hope it’s going better for you.)

Queer as in F*ck You

This is actual a combo pack of a few smaller headlines from the last month. I’m putting them all together because it’s the last night of Black History Month and just a little over the one year anniversary of when Brittney Griner was first wrongfully detained in Russia and she’s been everywhere this week, and each time it leave me emotional, OK?? Consider this your In Case You Missed It:

And this one is personal to my interests, but BG and Cherelle were both styled by Courtney D. Mays for the Image Awards — a Black queer woman who has also styled Sue Bird, Breanna Stewart, thee Roxane Gay, and a variety of NBA players. Courtney’s on my bucket list for interviews this year, so fingers crossed. Anyway look through this carousel, read that caption, and tell me you feel some feelingsl!?!

I just.. I really, really love us.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Courtney Mays (@courtneydmays)

Queer Stories in Florida’s Black History

Ex Talk Is a Deal Breaker? Absolutely Not. It’s a Treasured Feature of Queer Culture

Proud Trans Man Who Once Detransitioned Blasts ‘Fascist’ TERF Groups for ‘Exploiting’ Him. “Three years ago, trans non-binary man Toby Pick was speaking at an anti-trans event against gender-affirming healthcare in the UK.”

It’s rare when the part of my interests that are about the NBA (I used to joke that I learned more about the NBA via osmosis of being Black than I did about the WNBA via osmosis of being gay) overlap with this website, but Kareem Abdul-Jabbar on the New York Times writer protest and anti-trans bias is worth reading.

Both Sides of a Breakup: She Didn’t Tell Her Family She Was Dating a Woman. “Two exes explain why it ended.”

And circling back to the NAACP Image Awards! You’ve probably heard about Dwyane Wade and Gabrielle Union’s speech about their daughter, Zaya Wade, this weekend. But seeing it over videos of Zaya and their life together is what finally broke me into tears. Kudos to Oprah’s social media team:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Oprah Daily (@oprahdaily)

Saw This, Thought of You

Shelli found you this: SZA Has Always Been Alternative — You Just Weren’t Listening (a great time to also remind you that Shelli also wrote this epic vapid fluff investigation SZA Hints At Being On Team Sapphic!! — one of the funniest pieces that we’ve published)

America’s Strangest Household Obsession Is Roaring Back. The Backstory Will Give You Pause. Spoiler Alert: It’s [bath beads].

And also, Ocean Plastic: How Tech Is Being Used to Clean up Waste Problem (Are there plastic in bath beads? Who’s gonna tell me?)

So many corners of the internet right now are talking about The Cut’s piece on Ozempic and I am going to link it here, because it’s my job to gather up the things the internet is talking about and deliver them to you, but also know that it’s particularly upsetting to read if you’ve dedicated yourself to any kind of fat liberation or even just healthy and non-damaging ways to care about your body. (Also we have a different piece about Ozempic coming in the future that I’ll be much more excited to share.)

Black Joy: Resistance, Resilience and Reclamation. Please click through for a photo of James Baldwin and Nina Simone that’s brought so much me pure sunshine.

Political Snacks

Why Is Media Disavowing Activism? HATE THIS. (Though what an opportune time to remind you to support queer indie media)

Still thinking of my beloved Buffalo. All U.S. Extremist Mass Killings in 2022 Linked to Far Right, Report Says.

And One More Thing…

Fuck yes, this feels good.

Also.Also.Also: Have You Seen the Indigo Girls Tiny Desk Concert Yet?

It’s 9pm my time and I am just now publishing this link round up. So ummmm, yeah. That’s how my day went.

Queer as in F*ck You

Indigo Girls Tiny Desk Concert!! DID YOU HEAR ME!?!? INDIGO GIRLS TINY DESK CONCERT!!! I have to be honest here, I am not usually the biggest* fan of the specific kind of music that I usually casually refer to as “lesbian folk lite ballad rock with a guitar” (is this actually rock music? no? but do you know exactly what I mean? yes) — there are two exceptions: One is obviously Brandi Carlile, and the second is the Indigo Girls, who I have loved since before I was gay.

There is quite nothing like listening to Emily Saliers and Amy Ray while you’re drinking a glass of lemonade and writing in your journal during the summer with sunburnt shoulders and scrapped knees (as 16-year-old me can attest), but the adult version of that experience, listening along while you wash dishes tonight, or an end of day glass of wine curled on your couch, or maybe with your morning coffee and a scone tomorrow morning? Yeah, that’s pretty damn good, too.

I’ll let NPR take it from here:

“In politically purposeful T-shirts — Emily Saliers wore one reading PROTECT TRANS KIDS, while Amy Ray’s was from the environmental justice-oriented Water is Life Festival — the two shared space as only they can, trading off songs each had written while becoming one through their trademark harmonies.”

Turns Out Shel Silverstein Made the Perfect Cartoon for Queer Jews

When You Were Here: A Series Centering the Humanity of Trans Lives Stolen by Violence. “When You Were Here is a series commemorating trans people whose lives were taken. Rather than centering their murders, our stories incorporate memories from people who loved them to illuminate the times when they were alive—when they were here.”

I’m In A Polyamorous Throuple — Here’s How We Divide Our Finances

12 Global Queer Art Shows Worth Traveling for in 2023

Saw This, Thought of You

Did you hear about the new 90s themed American Girl dolls? Because honestly, they look extremely gay in the exact same way of this list we made of 90s sitcom leads ranked by their lesbian energy a few years ago. (A birdie has told me we have a post about this coming soon, so get ready!)

hahaaa probably related, The Puzzling Gap Between How Old You Are and How Old You Think You Are

Asteroids Are The Spice Your Horoscope Needs. Does this make sense to me? No? But does anything related to astrology make sense to me?

Political Snacks

(Usually, I’d put these under “Queer as in Fuck You” but damn I didn’t want to sour the Indigo Girls Vibes, you know??)

Colorado Springs Club Shooter Ran Neo-Nazi Site. I am not surprised. (Related, and equally not surprising: U.S. Mass Killings Linked to Extremism Spiked Over Last Decade)

Also, Suspect in Attack on LGBTQ Club Will Stand Trial on Murder and Hate Crime Charges

Also.Also.Also: Historic Wave of 2023 Bills Sets a Political ‘War Against LGBTQ+ People,’ According to New Report

Feature photo by Spencer Platt/Getty Images

I won’t lie, today’s been kinda weird for my anxiety. But I am very much looking forward to the mango-cashew stir fry that’s on the other end of this post and therefore my work day. So lez get to it, my loves!

Don’t forget to treat yourself with some kindness today.

Queer as in F*ck You

2023 Wave of Bills Is Fueling a Political ‘War Against LGBTQ+ People,’ New Report Shows. Ok so my first reaction to this title was “this is fear based clickbait, and I will not succumb to it” — but honestly, I trust the 19th to give clear, facts-based reporting, and they once again come through here. In a new report, the Movement Advancement Project (MAP), which tracks LGBTQ+ policy, describes 2023 legislations at the state-level a “war against LGBTQ people in America and their very right and ability to openly exist.” This includes: gender-affirming care bans for trans youth becoming law in states where such bills were previously blocked, growing efforts to restrict how students learn about queer and trans subjects in schools, an increase in dehumanizing rhetoric nationwide. The HRC signaled similar alarms earlier in the week, having tracked 240 introduced anti-LGBTQ+ bills, including the most anti-trans bills ever filed that they’ve ever seen.

“I’ve been working in the movement for 15 years,” said Naomi Goldberg, deputy director and LGBTQ program director at MAP. “To me, this is a different moment. … It is hard to see this as anything but a full-out attack and full-out war on LGBTQ+ people when you look at all of the areas of life, at all of the parts of our communities that are being attacked.”

I don’t have an answer to any of this — because, talk about overwhelming!!! — but I definitely don’t think burying our head in the sand is going to get us anywhere. It’s going to be a long year of fights, on top of what has already been a lot of long years of fights, and it’s not going to be easier any time soon. But we do have each other, we can keep fighting. And that is a start.

And maybe, holding all of this, there’s no better time to honor Monica Roberts this Black History Month.  Monica Roberts Chronicled the Lives — And Deaths — Of Trans People as Only She Could

Vanessa loved this so much! On Dyke Cruising

“The New York Times” Is Repeating One of Its Most Notorious Mistakes. “The paper’s anti-trans coverage parallels its failings over gay rights and AIDS. But the Times appears determined not to learn from its own history.”

Surprising no one! Meta Has Profited From Over 200 Ads Using the Anti-lgbtq “Groomer” Slur, Even Though the Platform Claims It Prohibits the Term

Spain Gives Final Approval to Law Making It Easier to Legally Change Gender. “It will now be easier for people 16 and over in Spain to change gender on government documents.” (Spain also became the first country in Europe to entitle workers to paid menstrual leave!)

Saw This, Thought of You

Oh I guess it’s a double Vanessa type of day! Did you hear that she was quoted in Vogue last week?? The Enduring (and Quietly Romantic) Appeal of Sharing a Show With Your Partner

We’ll see. Rihanna Agrees ‘It’d Be Ridiculous’ to Not Drop an Album This Year.

As a kid who watched a lot of Y2K-era Hype Williams bubble camera music videos, is so fascinating! From the author, Elspeth Michaels, “What did the future look like to us 20 years ago? And how does it match up now? I wrote about my favorite Y2K-era Hype Williams music videos, futuristic aesthetics as inspired by Japan, and what ⁦Janet Jackson⁩ means to me.” The Aesthetics of Hope & Anxiety

I’ll admit, I didn’t know who Marvel Cooke was before today — but the Harlem Renaissance-era writer and labor organizer helped organize the first journalist labor union, and was the first Black woman to write for a white-owned paper. Badass! You can learn more here!

Political Snacks

Ohio’s Toxic Train Disaster Follows ‘Perfect Storm’ Of Cuts, Deregulation. “A toxic, fiery train derailment in rural Ohio [puts] the railroad industry’s history of cuts and deregulation in the spotlight.

And also, There’s No Toxic Spill Conspiracy. This Happens Constantly in America. “The East Palestine disaster raised public awareness of toxic spills, which are a disturbingly constant feature of U.S. capitalism. ”

And One More Thing…

🧡💜.

Also.Also.Also: Goodbye to Beloved Digital Magazine Catapult, Being Weird and Indie on the Internet Keeps Getting Harder

Hello! Happy Love Is Not a Lie* Day!

*for these 24 hours only

Very seriously, I love you. I hope you are warm. I hope you are happy. And thank you for coming to spend the next five minutes with me. You mean a lot and I’m glad you’re here.

Saw This, Thought of You

I know that, depending on who you are reading this, this might appear to be a small story. But Catapult has been a digital home for a lot of writers that no one else would give a chance too — because they were early in their career, or POC, or queer, or just fucking weird (and awesome). There are so few indie places left to publish the kind of heartfelt, quirky writing that I think a lot of you come to Autostraddle to read. Catapult was one of them. And with every loss, the waters around our little island start to feel ever more choppy. It’s been a hard, sad day around the Autostraddle Slack. I’m sending the team at Catapult of my love this evening. 🌹 Catapult to Shutter Online Magazine, Writing Classes

This is particularly well put:

https://twitter.com/carmencitaloves/status/1625650678784720896

And next, I have thought so much about this! In part because as a perpetually online millennial, I often worry about aging well on the internet. But also because I think wanting to be perceived as “cool” (or not) is a tale as old as time. This is such a fascinating study in digital anthropology. The Changing Online Language of Hearts. “How to show a heart — the universal symbol of love — has shifted on the internet over the years, driven by new technology.”

“In the U.S., the richest mothers and their newborns are the most likely to survive the year after childbirth — except when the family is Black, according to a groundbreaking new study.” Childbirth Is Deadlier for Black Families Even When They’re Rich, Expansive Study Finds

Great news, lesbians! Having a Cat in Your Dating Profile Makes You More Attractive, According to Poll

Queer as in F*ck You

This is cute!

Tegan and Sara Look Back: We Had Terrible Haircuts but We Had Self-Belief. “The Canadian indie pop duo recreate an old photo and ponder their ups and downs as twins”

Trans Witches Are Witches: Queer Gamers Launch Hogwarts Legacy Alternative

Tennessee Bill Filed After Drag Show Controversy Advances in General Assembly

Club Q, Site of Deadly Mass Shooting, Set to Reopen in the Fall. Sending them all of my strength and love.

Miss Argentina and Miss Puerto Rico’s Love Story Is Focus of New Fenty Ad

And speaking of my beloved Borinquen, Senate confirms Biden nominee, Puerto Rico’s first LGBTQ+ federal judge — “Gina Méndez-Miró, previously a Puerto Rico appeals court judge, was approved in the Senate on a 54 to 45 vote.”

Political Snacks

This act of resistance is a shot of serotonin, it’s been shared with me no less than four times since this weekend. Let it be a reminder and a lesson for all of us of what we are capable of.

https://twitter.com/Esqueer_/status/1624151531812446212?t=zRx4CCSmBsein1uUINOLWA&s=19

Also.Also.Also: Demand for Lightly Used Dildos Higher Than Anticipated

I had a craving for brownies that I could not shake, so then I bought the brownies. And now I know peace.

Saw This, Thought of You

An A+ member very helpfully wanted to get the word out, Squeaky Clean Toys will take your gently used sex toys for resale, and if you want to learn more: Owners of Used Sex Toy Company Swear It’s Not Gross.

Admittedly, I don’t love the title of the article, but I do know that readers are often asking us what to do with their old sex toys! Which I think is a fair question or concern, especially when you think about both the price of toys and also just… there is limited space for waste on this planet, and the last time I checked most toys were not biodegradable (someone tell me if I’m wrong in the comments!). And not all queer couples feel the same about using old toys on multiple partners, etc etc etc. Personally, I say boil them/sanitize them/ and keep it moving for eternity — I keep toys until the motor dies out — but here are some other options.

‘I Felt Powerless’: Black Americans Suffering From Long COVID Say They Have Trouble Accessing Care

Fuck thiiisssssss. The Snitch in the Silver Hearse: The FBI Paid a Violent Felon to Infiltrate Denver’s Racial Justice Movement, “Mickey Windecker encouraged violence, accused activist leaders of being police cooperators, and tried to draw demonstrators into elaborate stings.”

Nico smartly also recommends this related reading material, Why Misogynists Make Great Informants

This one goes out to all my depressives! Too Much Serotonin Is A Bad Thing, Actually

RIP, Stripper Web. “For 20 years, the forum was a haven for new dancers seeking community.”

How Educators Secretly Remove Students With Disabilities From School. “Known as informal removals, the tactics are ‘off-the-book’ suspensions often in violation of federal civil rights protections for those with disabilities.”

This Winnie the Pooh Is Terrifying. “When the gentle bear fell into the public domain, a horror director pounced.”

Queer as in F*ck You

I didn’t know that The New York Times’ infamous Modern Love column is now a podcast? I Promised God It Was the Last Time. “After years of suppressing her gay desires, an ultra-Orthodox Jewish woman reaches her breaking point.”

TikTok’s Chief Operating Officer, Vanessa Pappas, Came Out as Nonbinary

There’s a large smattering of local state-level gay news and it is… all bad? So, ripping it off like a band-aid:

Political Snacks

Originalism Is Going to Get Women Killed. “A federal court has ruled that a law barring domestic-violence offenders from owning firearms is unconstitutional.”

It’s No Coincidence That the Midterms Turned the Blackest Parts of America Red. “While Democrats celebrate an averted crisis, the GOP campaign to quell and marginalize Black voters has only continued.”

So Tuesday was Biden’s State of the Union address, let’s see about that:

🙃

Also.Also.Also: “Save Women’s Sports Act” Lacks Plan to Save Women’s Sports

Everyone please keep a thought of kindness to my work colleagues over the last two days as they keep being so patient while all of my waking hours have been dedicated to getting Beyoncé tickets. (I’m so close!!)

Queer as in F*ck You

This op-ed is a local story, but really hits exactly where it needs to hit:

“The proposed ‘Save Women’s Sports Act’ does nothing to protect or support girls and women in sports. If those putting forth this legislation actually listened to the needs and concerns of women in sports, they would outline clear steps to protect women and girls from the rampant sexual assault and harassment plaguing sports — issues we’ve been fighting in the NWSL. They would clarify what’s being done to ensure all institutions in Missouri are Title IX compliant. They would outline a plan to promote equal pay for women athletes. They would ensure young women and girls have equitable resources in sport, especially young women and girls of color. Instead, they’re pushing kids away from the life-changing power of sports, forever depriving them of the invaluable lessons sport teaches, and the best friends they would find on their teams.”

Olympic gold medalist and two-time FIFA World Cup champion Becky Sauerbrunn: Let Missouri Trans Girls and Women Play

Saw This, Thought of You

First and foremost, here are updates on the aftermath of the earthquake in Turkey and Syria. And now, here’s how to help.

How to Tell If Your Brain Needs a Break

The Mounting, Undeniable Me Too Backlash

Food for thought! A Friend Doesn’t Have To Be ‘Toxic’ To Be Bad For You

Always relevant: How I Reclaimed A Good Night’s Sleep (and this is a great chance to plug my magnum opus — “Go The F*ck To Sleep!” 8 Ways to Kick Insomnia’s Ass)

“Until recently, women entertainers could count on their 40th birthday as the death knell for their cultural relevance.” The Midlife Renaissance of Women in Hollywood, a quick lil meditation on Jennifer Coolidge, Pamela Anderson, and our current moment in pop culture.

From the author, Jireh Deng 鄧以樂 “The news moved on fast, but I needed time to process how the shooting in my neighborhood shattered our sense of safety in Asian American suburbia. Can we look beyond ‘hate crimes’ as a framework for justice?” Monterey Park Was a Place Where We Didn’t Need to Assimilate. How Do Asian Americans Regain Safety?

Political Snacks

Can you imagine saying, “oh it just cost us so much to steal your land and destroy it in the pursuit of a capitalist nightmare and now we simply cannot afford to pay you back for the generations of trauma and harm we caused?” Ontario Says ‘Colonization’ Costs Mean It Does Not Owe First Nations Billions

White Supremacy Is a Script. “In South Africa, a broken culture of law enforcement has extended long past the formal end of apartheid.”

Tonight is the State of the Union, and Tyre Nichols’ mother, Rowvaugh Wells, is attending the address as a guest of Jill Biden, becoming among the first family members of Black people killed by police to sit in the House chamber for the speech. ‘They Need to See’: Rowvaughn Wells on What It Means to Attend Biden’s State of the Union Address

Also.Also.Also: I Need To Know The Y2k Trends You Remember

Ok so… I haven’t “meal planned” (like take time, plan out the week, go to the store, prep ingredients, reuse and repurpose leftovers, you know meal plan) since before the pandemic? But I committed to it this week, and I have to be honest with you first of all — it is so much work. However much work I remembered it being, it’s more. But second, I’m so excited for tonight’s dinner.

Saw This, Thought of You

How Well Do You Remember Y2K Trends? PLEASE PLEASE take this quiz, run into our comments, and tell me your results! I haven’t taken it yet because I am still running around finishing work! But I don’t know, you know, some days just deserve a silly Y2k quiz that maybe makes no difference of consequence, but can take away whatever is worrying you for at lest five minutes in a completely neutrally pleasant way, and today is one of those days.

Speaking of which! For those of us who are old enough to remember ye olde internet past: Gawker Is Shutting Down For a Second Time

Biden Is Ending the COVID Public Health Emergency. Here’s What That Means for You.”A hidden experiment in universal health care is about to end.”

A Fashion Show That Widens the Lens on Asian Identity. “The art collective CFGNY held a conceptual fashion show at the Japan Society.”

This feels like the HOT BUTTON topic of the day, a modern day Miss Manners Etiquette brought to you by New York Magazine: Do You Know How to Behave? Are You Sure? How to text, tip, ghost, host, and generally exist in polite society today.

Queer as in F*ck You

“Part of the appeal of having pit hair is that it makes me attractive to the people I actually want to be attractive to.” I Learned To Love My Body Hair While I Was Transitioning

Nonbinary Broadway Performer Opts Out of Gendered Tony Awards. “Justin David Sullivan of “& Juliet” decided to abstain from consideration and urged awards shows to ‘expand their reach.'”

Amy Ray’s New ‘Subway’ Video Is Nostalgic for Young Queer Love, NYC

8 Trans & Nonbinary Artists Who Have Grammy Noms

Political Snacks

I was not prepared for how angry this made me! You’d think I saw my anger coming? But whew boi, I did not. The College Board Strips Down Its A.P. Curriculum for African American Studies

Also.Also.Also: Noted Lesbian Author Kristen Arnett Was a Clue on Jeopardy, the Category Was “Get Stuffed”

It’s Tuesday already. How?? And simultaneously, how is it only Tuesday??

Queer as in F*ck You

Ok so this is a slight editor’s privilege, but tonight’s headline goes out to Kristen Arnett WHO WAS A CLUE ON JEOPARDY TODAY (click to hear the clue in real time) and our entire workplace cannot stop screaming about it!!!!

And then an indie bookstore got involved, and it was so cute? But obviously the winner here is the Kristen Arnett’s fiancée, my daily coconspirator, woman of my heart, queen of the Autostraddle daily calendar, our Managing Editor Kayla Kumari:

THATS GAY indeed. Ok let’s see what else!

It’s been days, and I have not stopped being angry. Utah Just Became the First State of 2023 to Ban Gender-Affirming Care (and to read more: Utah’s New Anti-trans Law Is “Brutally Unfair” and Will Face a Legal Challenge, Advocate Says)

Dwyane Wade and Gabrielle Union Share Sweet Photos with Zaya Wade Ahead of Winter Formal. At least there’s some good in the world, somewhere.

nbd JUST AUTOSTRADDLE BEING INTERVIEWED BY CNN!!!!! Congrats to Nic and Valerie 🎉 How ‘the Last of Us’ Did Bill and Frank Justice — And Impressed Many LGBTQ Fans

Saw This, Thought of You

I’m sorry… what. Wait, So Now Even My Hair Is Aging?

How Our Definition of Healthy Fails Black Women. I think about this a lot.

I was actually just talking about this over the weekend! Black Teen Girls On TV Are A Mess… Finally

Political Snacks

“In life, Nichols had been diminished to an abstraction, a target for the inchoate rage of men who were, at least nominally, part of his own community. In death, he was reduced again—this time to a cudgel with which to goad liberals for their one-note fixation with racism. Observers on the right seized on the racial uniformity of the incident as if the fact that Black cops are also capable of behaving so violently toward a Black man might retroactively exonerate similarly violent white cops of the charge of racism. “liberals blame racism for memphis man’s brutal beating despite officers being black,” a headline on the Fox News Web site claimed. The left, exasperated conservatives appeared to be saying, is so bereft of novel ideas that it blames white people even for situations in which no white people are present.

Yet seemingly few Black people have harbored the delusion that white people are the sole vectors of white supremacy.”

The Killing of Tyre Nichols and the Issue of Race by Jelani Cobb for the New Yorker, one of the few people I want to hear from during times like this.

OK. And now! To be honest, I debated including this. I don’t want to fear monger for the sake of doing it, and I don’t believe Trump will ever be President again so giving him any kind of platform for his hate (even here, in a publication that’s obviously standing against everything he says, that goes without saying) is dangerous.

I also know that coordinated attacks on trans kids and trans adults — because it is not going to stop at trans kids, not that it matters — has been gaining groundswell years, we all know this, and that’s shaping up to becoming the defining lines of a right wing culture war going into the 2024 election. So, by that measure, ignoring Trump once before because “he simply could not win” was something promised myself never to do again. Here we are, getting prepared: Trump Vows to ‘Stop’ Gender-Affirming Care for Minors if Re-Elected President

Also.Also.Also: 00s Rom Comcore Is 2023’s Hottest Trend, Get Ready to Scream “You’re a Wanker, Number Nine!”

PIZZA NIGHT 🍕

Saw This, Thought of You

How To Channel 2023’s Rom-Comcore Fashion Trend. Ok so first of all, as the editor of a website that has somehow covered both Cottagecore and Mermaidcore — I think all of y’all are lying to me and that all it takes is adding “core” to the end of a word to make it a “trend.” But second! And most important! As someone who dressed as a 00s era rom com lead the first time around.. these looks are bad! Trust me, They. Are. BAD. I provide the following scene from Imagine Me & You as evidence:

In a still from the movie Imagine Me & You, two white lesbians hold each other in a hug while laughing. They are wearing classic 00s fashion, including a useless scarf and a short sleeved t-shirt over a long sleeved t-shirt.

Why did we do this to ourselves, as a people.

Sports Networks Will Invest in Just About Anything Before Women’s Sports — Including Pickleball. “ESPN and the likes often take a flier on young sports leagues — as long as they are men’s leagues”

I thought I was the only one who noticed! Welcome to the Shoppy Shop, “Why does every store suddenly look the same?”

Do You Use These Words When You Apologize? It’s Time to Stop. Food for thought!

Queer as in F*ck You

This one goes out to that time in junior year of my Catholic high school when I got a JUG (that’s Catholic school for detention) for challenging my religious studies teacher that nowhere in the Bible does it say Homosexuality was sinful. Lil Carmen knew what the f-ck she was talking about! Pope Says Homosexuality Not a Crime

As Roxane Gay and Debbie Millman’s #1 fangirl, it will not surprise you that I am OBSESSED with this! OBSESSED, I SAY! Roxane Gay in Antarctica: The Things We Do for Love. “Once upon a time, writer Roxane Gay and her wife, the illustrator Debbie Millman, set sail to Antarctica. Here, they each tell the tale — well, their version of it.”

NYC Council Grills Jails Commissioner on Trans Detainees at Rikers. “In a combative appearance, Louis Molina denied there was a problem, despite the collapse of the LGBTQ+ Affairs unit under his tenure.”

Political Snacks

Sorry, Twitter, but Florida’s War on Books Is No Joke. Ron Desantis Wants to Keep Kids From Reading.

And I truly don’t know if this provides any comfort with how terrifying everything is, but Less Than 10% Of 2022’s Anti-lgbtq State Bills Became Law, Report Finds

Read ad-free: join AF MEDIA