Switching to Menstrual Cups Made Harvesting My Blood for Witchcraft 1000% More Convenient

I don’t know why I was so hesitant to try a menstrual cup, honestly. For some reason I thought that it would be more annoying than tampons, but when I picked up Flex Menstrual Discs pack after someone at Autostraddle mentioned them, I both realized I was devastatingly wrong in my previous assumptions AND I was hooked.

I mean, you only have to change a flex disc twice a day? WHAT?!? This opened up untold possibilities for me, just in the world of not having to stick tampons into every pocket and crevasse of my person when leaving the house for extended periods (ha). That and there is no nasty dingle dangly string. Life-changing.

Then, the good people at Aisle offered me a free menstrual cup sample (if you’re an A+ Member, both Aisle and GladRags offer A+ Member discounts and carry menstrual cups by the way). And my world just exploded. It was a total galaxy brain moment.

So, I tried the cup! You boil it like a dildo to sanitize it which was cool and made me feel safe and then I just popped it in. There were no leaks and I only had to empty it 2-3 times a day which means that yes I could sleep for like eleven straight(gay) hours without getting up which is a thing I sometimes do on my period. You clean it in between…um…emptyings which is cool and yes, does feel far less wasteful, or at the very least is far more convenient than other products.

Look, maybe you’re going to some kind of event. What if you didn’t have to change your tampon in the woods or a port-o-john while at a festival or a sex party or whatever gathering? What if the cup… was simply sufficed or was easy enough to handle while on an egregiously long hike? I know that feminists have been trying to tell me this since the first time I went to a Rainbow Gathering and it’s my own fault for not listening, but we are all on our own journeys of self-discovery! I ACCEPT THE ADVICE YOU ALL KEPT GIVING ABOUT “MY MOON” OKAY. Which is that, I need to embrace my independence outside of corporate constructs, especially those grounded in the cotton/disposable products industry. And it’s been nice, and actually has made me a more present member of the community because, honestly, worrying about my period was holding me back in ways I did not even realize.

But reader, it didn’t take me long before I moved onto the next most logical step. Rather than dumping my precious period blood down the sink, I instead saved it in a vessel and used it for witchcraft. When I poured the contents of my menstrual cup into that first mason jar, I was just whispering “this is genius,” I tell you what.

This is FREE BLOOD, people! Free! Listen, my fellow menstruators, there is no Buffy (but also-literally-everything-else) style palm-slitting required with this method! I never understood why they did that in movies and on TV anyway. Palm/hand is literally one of the worst places to have a cut. You’re on your period. You’re gonna suffer anyway. Why not get something out of it?

I do have to note that the traditional CUP was way easier to harvest blood from than the DISC, though I did try it with both. The disk is made of a thin, almost wrap-like plastic in the center, so if you want to get the blood, you have to do a lot of finagling. I do speak from experience, but recommend the cup for this purpose, ultimately.

Look, I by no means invented using menstrual blood for witchcraft. That shit goes waaaayyyyyy back. But the thing is, with modern tampon technology, I was always unclear on what the best way to collect period blood actually was. What was I gonna do? Wring out a tamp? Have period blood with a bunch of bits of cotton in it? Plus it sounds like a mess. The menstrual cup makes this so tidy!!

I rate this experience 5 out of 5 pentagrams. No further notes.