Rick Santorum is not going to win the GOP nomination. Nate Silver’s algorithms calculate that Romney has a roughly 98% chance of winning the nomination — and while Silver’s not infallible, it seems pretty safe to say that he’s smarter than Rick Santorum. So why do we need to keep dwelling on what he says, no matter how homophobic it is? Well, while none of the GOP frontrunners remotely support gay marriage or generally considering us above second-class citizens, Santorum has made badmouthing gays a central part of his political stance since the good old days of the coining of the term “santorum.” His views are, put politely, extreme — some of what he says wouldn’t sound surprising coming from Pat Robertson or Fred Phelps after they’ve had a drink or eight down at the weekly meeting of the Unhinged Reactionary Religious Talking Heads, which is held at Buffalo Wild Wings. The difference is that Santorum isn’t actually a fringe religious leader; he’s a fairly legitimate contender for the GOP candidacy to the President of the United States of America, and many people take him very seriously. We don’t need to freak out over what Santorum is saying because he might be our next President, but we should pay attention to what he says at the very least because people are listening. And even after Santorum loses the nomination, they’re not going anywhere.
For instance, this week brought us the story of a woman in South Carolina who confronted Santorum about the fact that her son is gay — and she’s still supporting Santorum. Instead of asking him to treat her son like a human being in terms of his policy recommendations, she asked “how to deal” with the conflict in her political beliefs vs. her life and family. Which, right off the bat, tells you a lot about how much of the population Santorum’s rhetoric sounds only slightly objectionable to, if at all. And even more telling is what Santorum (and his helpful wife, Karen, bless her heart) responded with, because it probably sounds completely reasonable to a large portion of the population. Here’s why it isn’t.
1. “Rick does not hate anyone. He loves them. What he has simply said is marriage shouldn’t happen.”
Even leaving aside the more obvious logical problem with this statement — since all the “rational” arguments against equal rights for gays, like the idea that gay marriage will harm straight marriage, are baseless, prejudice is the only real explanation — it’s beside the point. If Santorum, against all odds, became President, it wouldn’t matter whether he “loves” us or not. What would matter is that he doesn’t want us to have the same rights as other Americans. An elected official’s job isn’t to “love” his constituents — it’s to represent their interests and protect their rights. Since Santorum clearly has no interest in doing either of those things, how much he likes us is pretty irrelevant.
2. “There’s all sorts of other relationships that people have, and they are valuable relationships. Whether they’re amorous relationships or friendship relationships or familial relationships, they’re all important, they all have value, they all should be affirmed, but that does not mean that we should change the laws to order, to create an atmosphere where children and families are not being promoted.”
Forgive me for thinking this sounds suspiciously like “separate but equal.” It’s not that same-sex relationships and families aren’t as good — that is, as “valuable” or “important” or worthy of being “affirmed” — as straight ones, it’s just that they don’t need, you know, the same treatment under the LAW. Aside from the hypocrisy (it’s a little cruel to reassure someone that their relationship “should be affirmed” while simultaneously refusing to actually affirm it, no?), it ignores the reality that many LGBT couples and families live with. While many of us do care about being affirmed, most of us also care about being able to visit our kids and partners in the hospital, qualify for tax breaks, and retain parenting rights in the case of a divorce. By acting as if the only thing at stake is our delicate gay egos being hurt, Santorum ignores and thus tacitly approves of the fact that we’re economically and legally disadvantaged every day.
3. “This is not an issue of not doing what I’m called to do, which is to love everyone and accept everybody and, uh, but this is a public policy difference. I think the problem is that some see that public policy difference as a personal assault.”
This one comes last because it is, arguably, the worst. And also arguably the most heartbreakingly sincere thing that you’ll ever hear come out of an anti-gay’s mouth — because there really are people who believe that if you could just understand that it’s not a personal issue, you would be willing to agree to disagree. The thing is, though, that denying gay individuals and gay families equal rights under the law IS Â a personal issue. It has to be; since our equality wouldn’t negatively impact a single other group, and would in fact provide stability for families and children, provide stimulus money as weddings are held, and possibly even decrease the demand for mental health services as our stress as stigmatized people lessens, this isn’t about anything but us. Prohibiting someone from marrying their partner, adopting their child, or being out at work without fear of job loss has the sole result of making their lives worse; or, if we’re being very generous, making their lives worse and also helping a conservative politician get elected or stay in office. Gay people are very well aware that the straight people in our communities can go blissfully unaware, often forever, of all the social institutions and legal rights we don’t have access to; it’s clearly not about them. But as long as people like the South Carolina Santorum supporter can go on believing that people who fight for specifically anti-gay legislation don’t mean for it to hurt anyone “personally,” they can go on believing that it’s fine to get behind it despite the gay “person” in their lives.
As far as conversations about gays on the campaign trail, this woman is mostly an anomaly; Santorum has in fact been called out on his homophobic views nearly constantly. And again, it seems fairly unlikely that he will ever become President of the United States. But even after Santorum retreats to the Elysian fields of wherever the other nominee wannabes go after not making it, the people who thought his ideas sounded reasonable, if not electable, will still be here. And there are more of them than it’s comfortable to think about — while Santorum did find himself booed in New Hampshire by one audience and eventually lost the primary, he was also warmly received by many a voting Republican. It’s worth it to pay attention to what he says, if only so that when someone else repeats it, you’ll be able to tell them why they’re wrong.
