This is a recap of RuPaul’s Drag Race episode 1413. Spoilers below.
Dying is easy, comedy is hard. Watching queens on RuPaul’s Drag Race bomb comedy challenges? Even harder. If you thought it was painful to watch Snatch Game, just wait until you see the Roast.
We begin in the aftermath of Bosco’s surprise save. She says she feels like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory which is probably a reference to the golden ticket but should be a reference to when Charlie and Grandpa Joe drink the fizzy lifting drink and almost die but for some reason are forgiven by Willy Wonka even though the other kids upon making errors were immediately dragged by Wonka’s exploited workforce who not only run his chocolate factory but are also apparently trained in musical improv. I digress.
It’s a new day in the workroom and the queens are joined by Norvina, the president of Anastasia Beverly Hills, dressed like if Zenon: Girl of the 21st Century grew up and got into porn. And I love it!! The mini challenge is to recreate a mural from Asheville, North Carolina that has Dolly Parton and RuPaul’s faces side by side. They’re supposed to paint the blank mural with a giant make up palette filled with paint.
The queens split off into two groups. Bosco, Daya, Willow, and Camden are painting Dolly. Angeria, Jorgeous, and DeJa are painting Ru. Looking at these two groups is a clear reminder of just how few queens of color are left in this competition.
It’s a fun mini challenge, because it’s an impossible task and because, as Willow says, Jorgeous looks like a cartoon hamster carrying the giant make up brush. Team Dolly wins.
The main challenge this week is The Roast of Ross Matthews. Because Team Dolly won, they get to pick the order. Angeria asks to be in the first half, DeJa doesn’t want to go first or last, and Jorgeous wants to go second. The other four manage to meet all of these requests. After the Bosco vs. Camden Rusical fight, no one is looking for more drama. The final order is Bosco, Jorgeous, Willow, Angeria, Daya, DeJa, and Camden.
Dulcé Sloan from The Daily Show is this week’s guest judge and, along with Michelle, helps the queens in rehearsal. They push Bosco to be meaner and funnier. And Dulcé tells Willow to focus on having an economy of words. Daya and Camden are the only two to get big laughs in the rehearsal. I’ve watched enough seasons of Drag Race to know the rehearsals mean nothing. In fact, sometimes a good rehearsal can be a sure sign someone is going to bomb — and I immediately knew, either Daya or Camden would bomb.
Bosco opens the show with big spiky hair and great spiky jokes. She’s followed by Jorgeous who is terrible but still manages to get laughs from her number one fan RuPaul. Willow is relaxed and great. Angeria has such a good energy and does pretty well. Daya starts off saying she’s nervous and not funny and then proceeds to be nervous and not funny. But not as much as DeJa who tells the same failed jokes she told in rehearsal and BOMBS. Camden closes the show with a solid set.
The runway this week is Tutu Much. My lover Bosco outdoes herself with what she describes as “Buzzsaw Ballerina” — a saw around her waist, saws in her shoulders, a saw going down her head. It’s incredible. Jorgeous follows with a blue tutu with a leather jacket and leather cap. She says it’s her version of butch which is just a wonderful way for someone to describe themself while wearing a tutu. Willow’s look is also stunning. Inspired by Amanda Lepore and Cruella DeVille, big fake lips and all. Angeria is in a four layered lime tutu gown. Daya is in platform heels and a look that’s basic but, to her credit, self-designed from recycled materials. DeJa is lacking in what she calls “Prom Candyland.” And, finally, Camden lives out her ultimate tutu fantasy with a look that’s classic but far from basic — the gems on her clothes spread to her legs, her arms, and her face.
The judging is largely about who took notes and who had the right attitude. Dulcé praises Bosco for listening to all their feedback, unlike DeJa — and even Camden — who stuck with jokes that bombed in rehearsal. They also praise Angeria for having such a great energy even if her jokes weren’t great. In contrast, they tell Jorgeous and Daya that they needed to have more fun and keep their nerves to themselves.
Camden is safe. Bosco wins! Willow and Angeria are also safe. Daya, Jorgeous, and DeJa are ALL up for elimination. And TWO are going home.
They lip sync to Olivia Rodrigo’s “good 4 u,” a song made for Daya Betty’s drag and she delivers her best lip sync of the season. Jorgeous also does well but seems to have given up a bit. This is her fifth time lip syncing after all. DeJa is also there.
Daya wins. Jorgeous and DeJa are going home. This was the right decision but it also means we now have a top five with four white queens. Yes, this is partially due to frontrunner Kornbread’s injury, but it’s also indicative of who gets second chances on the show and who does not. The season began with Orion Story and Daya getting sent home and brought back only for June Jambalaya and Alyssa Hunter to be sent home weeks three and four in their place. And while personally I’m happy Bosco didn’t go home last week, again it’s a white queen getting another chance. Kerri Colby turned the whole cast trans and still didn’t get these kinds of breaks!
I don’t think DeJa and Jorgeous should’ve stayed another week. But I do think it’s worth asking which contestants the show deems disposable at the start of the season and who they allow to grow.
Teleport Us To Mars!! Here Are Some Random Thoughts:
+ Fun fact: My friends and I held a roast in high school and it was such a big mistake. Teenagers are not funny enough and are far too sensitive to pull this off! The only joke I remember is someone saying, “We all thought Drew was gay but then (name) cheated on him and he seemed upset so maybe not.” Joke’s on him, because I am gay!
+ Okay I had no idea Ross Matthews started as an intern for Jay Leno.
+ Bosco was so tickled by the mini challenge and that gave me a lot of joy.
+ Bosco says her set is tight and she prides herself on being tight. The way this queen has her foot on my neck and her ass in my fantasies.
+ I thought Ru’s runway look was so stunning!! What material was that??
+ When I was working in Cincinnati last summer, I spent a lot of time at this queer bar called The Birdcage. One of the queens who worked there performed “good 4 u” and was frankly better than these three Ru Girls. Her name is Aurora Starr and she’s so talented and you should follow her.
+ During Untucked, Willow’s family gives her such a sweet message!!!
+ Also during Untucked, Willow kisses both Angeria and Camden with her big fake lips.
+ Queen I’m rooting for: Any top four other than Willow, Angeria, Bosco, and Camden is unacceptable
+ Queen I have the biggest crush on: Bosco
+ Queen I want to sashay: Daya