In honor of The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom, let’s get you a video game girlfriend! Just make some choices below and I’ll score them in a completely scientific way and your soul mate will reveal herself! (For the sticker question, you can click through the link to go to the Etsy store where they came from; you can buy one if you want!)
So! Who’d you get?
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Heather Hogan is an Autostraddle senior editor who lives in New York City with her wife, Stacy, and their cackle of rescued pets. She’s a member of the Television Critics Association, GALECA: The Society of LGBTQ Entertainment Critics, and a Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer critic. You can also find her on Twitter and Instagram.
Heather Hogan has written 1718 articles for us.
Comments
“Your video game girlfriend is… Eivor!
The secret softie. You like a girl with a crunchy exterior and a gooey caramel center. A little gruff, maybe. Her laugh is not a gift she gives easily, but you don’t mind working to make her smile. Her softness is for you, and that’s just how you like it.”
This is so accurate, I’m actually shook…
YENNEFERRRRRRR I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. I actually tanked my romance w/ her when I played Witcher 3 because it was my first big video game and I couldn’t figure out how to sit in the boat xD. I feel healed now, thanks Heather.
princess zelda!!
“She’s sweet, and loyal, and powerful, and tenacious, and resilient, and magical… and you just need a little bit of patience to track her down.”
i will also include, the description for eivor sounds very much like me ;)
Hey, for the record the Protect Trans Youth pattern is by LJ Osborne who sells it through Green Pea Press, where all profits from sales go directly to charity. Other versions of it are copies. While LJ has said it’s fine to spread the image without credit, they’re not cool with someone else profiting off it. Could you link to that instead? I’ll comment again with the link.
https://www.greenpeapress.com/shop/p/protect-trans-youth
Oh my gosh, of course! Thank you so much for bringing it to my attention! Updating now!
Appreciate it! :D
Done! Thanks again, Cat!
Oh Shepard my love! And appropriate given that the fshep romance with Liara was a big part of me realizing my queerness!
She doesn’t like authority, she’s a little bit awkward, but she’s damn powerful and unapologetically sexy. A hero, some might say. Just be careful not to let her go full martyr in the name of honor. She can be a little over-zealous sometimes. She needs someone to both meet and balance her passion.
Princess Zelda!
Zelda ick. Where’s Ellie ha
Zelda!!!!
Aloy from Horizon Zero Dawn: “Sure, she’s got some complicated mom issues, and, frankly, a lot going on right now — but that’s okay with you because you want someone you can fight alongside anyway. You’d never be satisfied if you and your girl weren’t changing the world.”
I know nothing about video games but I like this!
“Your video game girlfriend is… Kassandra!
You want a girl to see the world with, a girl to share in your adventures, a girl who can keep you and your heart safe, and whom you can treat like a goddess. Which is good — because she is. A goddess, I mean.”
Also, she’s a total babe. I’m in !
Zelda! Funnily enough I have never played one of her games.
The DCOM question was very hard. And since when are there T-rex and penguin Monopoly tokens?! I clearly need to play a newer edition.
I got a lady I have never heard of from Mass Effect, but THANK YOU for linking the stickers!
Princess Zelda? I guess I can see that.
I got Isabelle from Animal Crossing. It wasn’t what I expected, but after thinking about it for a moment it makes total sense.
“You like a hard worker with soft heart, someone who isn’t embarrassed about being open and eager, and who loves to go all out decorating for every holiday. Is she a little bit of an over-explainer? Yeah, but you don’t mind. She knows a lot about a lot, and anyway, you love just the sound of her sweet voice. She’s not just your best girl, she’s the best girl.”
Yennefer! Yes love a strong magical woman.
Princess Peach!
“Oh you like your sweetie pies, don’t you? But, like, sweetie pies with a little bit of an edge. Sweetie pies with a secret grudge list and the ability — if called upon — to be both sweet and stabby.”
I do actually like her. 😁
Princess Zelda I see almost everyone choosing her and I am one of them hhhh. At game roms I also named my account Zelda
Choosing a ‘Video Game Girlfriend’ can be a fun and engaging aspect of gaming culture. From iconic characters like Lara Croft to newer favorites like Aloy from ‘Horizon Zero Dawn,’ the diverse range of personalities and strengths in these characters often adds depth to the gaming experience. It’s interesting to see how these virtual relationships or character preferences reflect our gaming tastes and the elements we appreciate in storytelling and character development.
I love the name Lisa, and I’ve given it to every game I play on Guaumod.io