Orphan Black Episode 210 Recap : “By Means Which Have Never Yet Been Tried”

Scotty frees Sarah and gives her the passkey, while Rachel writhes on the ground. I’m sad for Rachel, but also super excited about the Burberry eye patch she’ll no doubt be rocking soon.

Sarah runs into Kira’s room to rescue her, but Marion is already there. Marion tells her that they are free to go, and that she is very impressed with Sarah.

I was just putting on her new coat…

That better be faux fur!

Marion assures her that she has opened the doors, but that this doesn’t end with Rachel. If Sarah wants the truth, she has to meet with her tomorrow.

Cal takes Sarah to meet up with Cosima and Alison in Felix’s loft. Both Cosima and Alison give Cal the thumbs up, and Cal meets the clone club.

Yeah, I’d give him three fingers in the butt…

I’d put a whole fist in there!

Cal tells Sarah that he is going to help and he’s going to be around for Kira, especially when she re-donates marrow in six weeks. She thanks him for getting Marion to help, and they kiss. Felix interrupts them and calls them “steamy potatoes,” which is my new favorite phrase.

NOM NOM NOM

Art has brought Helena, who wants to meet her sestras. It’s a clone slumber party!

Hey sestras, I brought Twizzlers, let get this party started!

Helena walks in and finally meets Alison and Cosima. Then Kira comes running and jumps into Helena’s arms. Kira was worried that she ran away, but Helena promises her that she came back to see her little face.

Well, Kira likes her, and she’s the smartest person on this show, so I guess we better get on board.

Ugh, you guys, Helena has a family now! Remember last season when Helena was the villain and all scary and now she has sestras and love and a community? I’m so happy for this fictional crazy person I can’t even deal with it.

I’m dying from all the feels

As if things couldn’t get more awesome, Cosima puts on a record and they have a clone dance party! They even dance differently, with Alison smacking Felix’s ass and Helena head banging. It’s a really impressive scene effects-wise, and it’s always delightful to see the clones in the same room.

It’s like Klub Deer up in this bitch!

TURN DOWN FOR WHAT

Early the next morning, Sarah and Cosima are lying in bed. Sarah asks what Cosima is thinking about, and she tells her that she’s thinking of Buckminster Fuller, sacred geometry, and repeating patterns in nature. She even has a spiral tattoo about this golden ratio.

If we hooked up, wouldn’t that just be a form of masturbation?

Only one way to find out!

Sarah says that they’re all so different, and Cosima tells her that she is the wild type. She’s a survivor who propagates against all odds. Sarah tells Cosima that they can’t figure all this out without her, and they start crying. Cosima says that no matter what, she has to keep moving forward and seeking answers.

It symbolizes the endless repeating patterns of nature. Also, vaginas.

They don’t notice Helena, who sneaks out of the apartment, leaving her nitrogen egg tank behind. She leaves the apartment when she is suddenly hooded, tased, and taken away. She drops Jesse’s hat on the ground as she is carted off. Dammit, can’t Helena get a break?

Srsly tho, fuck this plot point

Spin-off series about a sentient hat and its journey back to its owner, Suits Jr. The hat will be voiced by Michael J. Fox.

Sarah has left, and Kira tries to wake up Cosima. Cosima isn’t responding. Is she dead? Her eyelids flutter and she sees Delphine telling her not to be afraid.

Go toward the light emanating from my cleavage…

Cosima wakes up and realizes it’s Kira at her side. Kira asks Cosima to read her a story, and everyone exhales because Cosima lives to cough another day.

Ghost boobs?

Sarah arrives at Marion’s mansion, and she walks in. She sees a little girl with a leg brace on that looks identical to Rachel’s home videos. Her name is Charlotte, and she calls Sarah her big sister. It’s a baby clone!

When I grow up I get to look like you? Jackpot!

Yeah, but puberty is a bitch…

Back at the loft, Kira and Cosima finish reading a book. Kira hands The Island of Dr. Moreau to Cosima to read next, and Cosima is shocked to find Duncan’s cipher inside. Kira tells Cosima that Duncan gave it to her as a present.

I’ve never seen a book with so many cartoon penises before!

At the mansion, Sarah asks Marion if she is Charlotte’s monitor. Marion tells her that she is her mother, and she adopted her. She says that, like Mrs. S, she is emotionally invested in the clone project.

And like Mrs. S, I am literally a Pandora’s box of lies and deception.

Sarah thought they couldn’t make any more clones, and Marion tells her that there were 400 attempts and only Charlotte survived. Marion tells Sarah she is counting on her loyalty, because she is about to share something huge and risky with her.

So, is your thievery genetic or was that more of a nurture sitch?

Marion works for Topside, a groups that steers the Dyad, along with many other multinational groups invested in the future of genetic engineering. They are in it for the profit, but Marion has discovered evidence of another agenda that she couldn’t confirm without Siobhan’s intel.

It’s like, you can’t even trust super secret military ops anymore!

We then see Helena handcuffed in the back of a van with a bunch of military guys. She is taken off the truck and onto an airplane.

She looks so sad and scared I’m very upset

Marion tells Sarah that the military never shut down Project LEDA. It was split into two operations: Dyad created female clones, while Project Castor carried male clones. She leads Sarah to a locked room where they watch a man do pull-ups. Sarah recognizes the man.

Just blasting my delts, bro

Who are the male clones? Fortunately, they aren’t Paul. Unfortunately, they also aren’t Felix.

Siobhan and Paul watch as Helena is loaded onto an airplane. Siobhan says that Sarah will never forgive her, but Paul tells her she did what she had to do. Once again, Helena pays the price for powerful people’s mistakes.

We’ve just made a huge mistake.

Elsewhere, Belt Buckle and Gracie get married in an empty church.

I now pronounce you, creepy as hell! You may kiss your child bride.

As Helena is marched onto the plane, we see the face of one of the military men. It’s the same face that’s doing pull-ups in Marion’s mansion.

Does this mean I have to stop calling him Belt Buckle? Disappointed.

Belt Buckle is the male clone! He stops doing pull-ups and presses his crazy face against the glass and leers at Sarah.

Heyyyyyy Sestra!

Nope Nope Nope

And that’s it! I’m excited to see what the show does with male clones, although I hope it doesn’t distract from the female clone’s storylines. What did you think? This season answered a lot of questions, but it raised a million others.

Thanks for reading along sestras; I look forward to having a clone dance party with all you!