Welcome to NSFW Sunday!
+ Your online dating profile doesn’t have to suck, and neither does writing it:
“Be honest about who you are, looks and personality-wise. Are you a workaholic beanpole who would rather stay in and watch your Melrose Place DVD box sets than go to da club? a. Call me; and b. Great details for your profile. No matter how nutso you think you are in the looks or personality department, there are people who will be into it. Let your freak flag fly upfront, and you’ll weed out the jackasses while simultaneously attracting people who are into your particular brand of funk.”
+ At the Hairpin, Lindsay King-Miller answers questions about when you mom U-hauls, when you and your siblings are gay and all want to come out in the next few months, lesbian vocabulary and more:
“If I could wave a magic wand and change one thing about the world, I think what I’d like to do—more than getting rid of the Tea Party or making student loans payable in mediocre poetry—is get rid of the entirely natural, entirely human, entirely useless impulse to “explain our identities,” specifically when it comes to sex. Sexual identities (gay, straight, bisexual, queer, etc.) were created as descriptors for behaviors and feelings—whom you fuck, whom you’d like to fuck, whom you’re attracted to, whom you love. What you do and what you want determines what you call yourself; what you call yourself doesn’t determine what you’re allowed to do.”
+ Betty Dodson gives advice to someone who wants vaginal penetration but wants sexual empowerment first.
+ Sometimes hooking up drunk with strangers is fun, and sometimes it isn’t. (Related: hook up culture is mostly for rich white kids.)
+ Sometimes political sex scandals matter and sometimes they don’t.
+ There are some things to keep in mind before you start a long-distance relationship. Hugs, or the lack thereof, matter more than you think, your person will be spending time with other people, different time zones are difficult and have an end game:
“During most of your conversations, there are whole swaths of human interaction you’re not privvy to. You don’t get to see them smile. You don’t get to sit next to them on the couch. You can’t tell that their body language is different when they’re upset. In fact, if you don’t talk to them via phone or video, you can’t know if they’re upset at all unless they volunteer that info.
This inherently puts more pressure on verbal communication. A lot more than we’re used to, in fact. If you were to walk into a room and see your partner crying on the couch, it would be insensitive to shove a video of a cat playing with boxes in front of their face. However, if your primary method of communication is via IM or text message, you can do exactly this without ever realizing it.”
+ And now, an excerpt from A.J. Stone’s “If You Can Make It There, You Can Make It Anywhere” in Glamor Girls: Femme/Femme Erotica, edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel:
“I lift my dress. Underneath I am wearing stay-up stockings. I circle my clit with my finger, beckoning her forward. First with my eyes and then, ‘Nathalie,’ I beg, my throat as thick and swollen as my cunt. She touches me, tentatively, her fingers brushing my hard clit. I moan and close my eyes, then will them open. I want to see her desire, her curiosity, as she sinks her fingers into me. Does she know that I’ve been wet all evening, willing her to do this? Does she know how many times my finger circled my clit at dinner, my eyes creamy not from candlelit but the look down the long slide towards orgasm? Her face is closed to my scrutiny.”
+ If you missed it, we made you a super-special fucking sexy-as-hell gallery last Sunday devoted to ass.
All of the photographs on NSFW Sundays are taken from various tumblrs and do not belong to us. All are linked and credited to the best of our abilities in hopes of attracting more traffic to the tumblrs and photographers who have blessed us with this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If there is a photo included here that belongs to you and you want it removed, please email bren [at] autostraddle dot com and it will be removed promptly, no questions asked.
Oh, wow. Needed this today :P
Super interesting articles on hookups! Thanks for the links.
Femme/Femme erotica…A whole book of it…
#thereisagod
It’s surprisingly good, too.
Alas, it appears to be the only one of its kind.
If I’m crying, cats playing with boxes is exactly what I want to see.
Femme/Femme erotica intrigues me BUT. The preview is written in 1st person. Personally I HATE porn written in first person. Oh well.
(Also the article about long distance relationships, a lot of it can also be applied to long distance friendships as well. Which. you know. most of my friendships are due to moving for school and hard time making more. Just thought that was interesting.)