Feature image of Nikki Hearts and Courtney Trouble from queerporn.tv.
Welcome to NSFW Sunday!
via andrewclifton
+ Jetta Rae wrote about being a trans woman and learning to masturbate at Eros:
“I didn’t necessarily transition to be happy — for me it was an act of resistance, against an assigned identity I didn’t want, a body I didn’t ask for, and the wacky ‘dogs talk, birds have human pets’ logic of the gender binary that crushes people’s lives.
Part and parcel to this resistance, for me, was to re-train my body to respond to vibrator play. I had endured too much bullying and disappointment in attaining life as a woman for myself to succumb to sexual dissatisfaction. Some people are stone, and happy in being so; I was ready to let go and lose myself in that dangerous, cacophonous chasm between ‘fetishized’ and ‘out of sight, out of mind’ that so many trans folk who don’t participate in the larger, ‘allowed’ sexual narratives are dangled over by the wicked strings of patriarchy.
When I picked up the Hitachi Magic Wand at the Good Vibes on Mission Street, I felt myself encircled by a private tempest, an aura of sought danger and frankly, a fear that I might somehow saw through my cock.”
via nightmoves
+ If you are an adult, still consider yourself a virgin, and want to stop being one, you should know you are not the oldest person who hasn’t had sex, you are free to define virginity for yourself instead of sticking to ideas about it as a social construct (because it’s totally a social construct) and you are free to feel whatever you need to feel. Also there are a few things that will help you have more fun, like low expectations, being sober and not exhausted, spending a lot of time on foreplay, using lube and not worrying if you don’t have a great time. Also:
“Talk about your expectations beforehand. Simply talking it out can help decrease your nerves and set more realistic expectations. Your partner might tell you that they just want to get the first time over with and focus on making the second time more fun. Or maybe you both agree to take your time and make it special.”
via colorandcurves
+ Don’t call your ex. (Don’t text your ex either.)
+ Nicki Minaj wants you to have orgasms.
+ Girl Sex 101 is the best sex guide I have ever read and you should read it too.
+ A school in Minneapolis took a sex ed class on a field trip to a sex shop.
+ At Oh Joy Sex Toy, Erika Moen reviewed kGoal, a kegel exerciser that works like a FitBit.
+ Artist Nika Cherrelle has created the Nikita, a six-inch silicone dildo shaped like a gun (“a gun that shoots orgasms”) as a way to explore her identity as a genderqueer woman and as a queer woman of color, and as a way to encourage discussions about sex and violence. According to Bitch:
“In addition to making a statement, the gun shape also turned out to be functional for a dildo. The Nikita’s trigger acts as a tickler to stimulate the clitoral or prostate areas. It can also be used as a hands-free strap-on by inserting the base of the gun grip into the vagina. The handle also makes the toy more ergonomic than some dildos: The handle allows the user to have more control and to reach a wide range of angles, whether someone is using it solo or with a partner. The toys are constructed from medical grade silicone and BPA-and pthalate-free. Cherrell is especially interested in the accessibility of the toy. As noted in this history, the modern dildo originated as a sex aid for people with disabilties. During prototyping of the Nikita, Cherrell says some people with disabilities found it simpler to use than typical dildos, since the handle makes it easier to grip.
Along with accessibility, Cherrell wants to reach people across the gender and sexuality spectrums. In her business plan, she defines her target audience as ‘based on what people do in the bedroom and not who they are.'”
Nicole Gibson via lingerietalk
+ Are you a vagina-having human? Do you know just how awesome your genitals are? They are pretty awesome and you should try to be friends with them:
“It doesn’t matter if you’ve done it before; unless you can draw an exact replica of your genitals from memory, you can benefit from taking another peek. If you feel anxious about it, try to relax yourself by taking some deep breaths, having a glass of wine, or scheduling it for a time when you know you’ll have uninterrupted privacy. Try to find the most comfortable position your body can get into that will allow you to take a peep. Depending on your physical ability, you may need to use a hand mirror, some props, or creative positioning.”
Mosh in Dottie’s Delights via the lingerie addict
+ Humans are bad at monogamy.
+ If you or your partner have injuries or medical issues, there are a few things you can do to maintain your sex life, including having a lot of sex in advance (if you have a scheduled surgery), thinking about sex differently, asking your doctor questions, respecting your limitations and more.
via rodeoh
All of the photographs on NSFW Sundays are taken from various tumblrs and do not belong to us. All are linked and credited to the best of our abilities in hopes of attracting more traffic to the tumblrs and photographers who have blessed us with this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If there is a photo included here that belongs to you and you want it removed, please email bren [at] autostraddle dot com and it will be removed promptly, no questions asked.
queer fashion!!!
https://www.etsy.com/shop/KillThePatriarchy
I really really wish I had the funds to help out the Nikita campaign. That is so amazing.
That guide to losing your virginity as an adult is suuuper hetero- and cisnormative! :S
I started using vibrators before my GCS this year – a small Lelo. I wish I had started earlier. It made pleasuring much less discordant for me.
Now – as I’m relearning what does and doesn’t work – I wish there was a bit more info for women like myself when buying toys.
Though I guess it’s still individual for everyone- and what I like has changed a little over this first year. I mean – I never thought I would like one made for penetration – but am glad I learned otherwise.
This was near to my thoughts. Discussions of post-op trans women’s sexuality are pretty rare to find. Never mind any serious analysis of sex toys or masturbation. I still feel trans women’s bodies are basically unmapped by culture in any state (pace a zine and blog or two). To be sure, it is a private discovery on a lot of levels. But post operative nuances, surprises, joys, differences, and difficulties are issues especially fraught with a telling silence. Our bodies are often subject to such cold and wheedling scrutiny from cis people, it’s hard for me, at least, to discuss these things without feeling endangered by a voyeuristic, exploitative aura of spectacle, despite the manifest need for public resources. GCS is so personal and intimate, I would venture sacred, that for many of us there may not yet be a space for such discussions, at least outside of more private fora.
Injured/medical issues sex and co-bedding also needs pillows lots of fuckin pillows and communication. One can never overstate the importance of communication in all of the things.
And pillows.
I really want that haircut in the last photo but I feel like it would be super weird to take a rodeOH picture to the lady who has been cutting my hair since I was 3.
Crop the picture before ya print or after, maybe? xP