NSFW Lesbosexy Sunday Is Going Skinny Dipping

Welcome to NSFW Sunday!

+ At Medium, Rachel Kramer Bussel writes about labels — for sexuality, gender, interest in BDSM and more — and why they might function as shorthand but don’t always matter:

“If you want to know what I’m really like in bed, you have to sleep with me. I don’t mean that as an invitation, but simply a fact. Whatever label I or others apply is always going to be just that: a label, a word that may be accurate at a given moment but will never encompass all the things that make up my sexuality, which is an ever-changing thing. That’s not true for everyone, but I imagine it’s true for many of us, especially over the course of our lives. There’s too much nuance to sex for one word to cover all our bases.”

+ When you take sexy photos, full nudity is overrated, avoid overhead lighting, pose a little, and more:

“Penthouse-style spread-eagle poses are overrated too — and there’s nothing worse than someone striking that pose when they don’t feel entirely comfortable naked in front of the camera (chances are, that’s you sunshine!). Go for candid, action shots instead — the action can be as innocent as laughing or blowing a kiss or something, er, racier.”

+ There are a lot of different theories about maintaining lust in a long-term monogamous relationship:

“As Perel found in interviewing what she calls “erotic couples,” they all share an understanding that “passion waxes and wanes.” As she explains in her TED talk, “They have de-mystified one big myth, which is the myth of spontaneity, which is that it’s just gonna fall from heaven while you’re folding the laundry like a deus ex machina.” It doesn’t — and often enough it requires planning. “Committed sex is premeditated sex,” she says. “It’s willful. It’s intentional.”

As sex therapist Marty Klein once told me in an interview, “When we’re young, we don’t have to develop the skill of planning for sex, of being patient, of waiting for when it’s going to be the right time … How many 40-year-olds who have any sort of a life do anything spontaneously? I mean, look at you and I, we wanted to have a conversation and we had to plan it. We didn’t say, you know, when you’re in the mood, give me a call.” In other words, you shouldn’t necessarily wait for the mood to strike.”

+ Cutesy vibrators are not sexy.

+ Tumblr has scrapped its erotica category and removed blogs with adult content from search engine indexing and its internal search.

+ Some guy in Virginia wants to outlaw oral sex under all circumstances.

+ Oh Joy Sex Toy has reviewed queer porn series The Crash Pad.

+ Skinny dipping is fun.

+ Solo Poly talks about core relationship values:

“1. Mutual respect and consideration (how we treat each other)
2. Autonomy and self responsibility (how we each take care of ourselves)
3. Integrity (be honest and walk your talk)
4. Joy (because otherwise, what’s the point?)”

All of the photographs on NSFW Sundays are taken from various tumblrs and do not belong to us. All are linked and credited to the best of our abilities in hopes of attracting more traffic to the tumblrs and photographers who have blessed us with this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If there is a photo included here that belongs to you and you want it removed, please email bren [at] autostraddle dot com and it will be removed promptly, no questions asked.

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Ryan Yates

Ryan Yates was the NSFW Editor (2013–2018) and Literary Editor for Autostraddle.com, with bylines in Nylon, Refinery29, The Toast, Bitch, The Daily Beast, Jezebel, and elsewhere. They live in Los Angeles and also on twitter and instagram.

Ryan has written 1142 articles for us.

22 Comments

  3. Omg that sewing machine tattoo! I <3 it. Also I totally agree that cutesy toys are not sexy.

  4. Oi, as someone whose girlfriend is the femmiest femme to ever femme, I can testify that cutesy vibrators are, in fact, sexy. Especially the cupcake one, which we have and is perfect for her. (If anyone here is familiar with sweet lolita fashion, you’ll understand what I’m talking about. Petticoats and ruffles and mmmmmmmm…)

    On a more cheerful note, daaaaamn, that third picture.

    • As your girlfriend I have to add: LOLITA FASHION IS NOT A SEX THING AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH I MEAN IT’S OKAY IF YOU FIND IT SEXY BUT FOR THE MAJORITY OF PEOPLE IT’S JUST A FASHIOOOOOOOOON okay I’m done

    • I was about to say that! Some people like cutesy and just want vibrating cupcakes, dammit.

      • I feel really uncomfortable being “sexy”… I am comfortable being cutesy, and therefore, it makes me feel sexy!

  5. In related news, “Virginia is for lovers” as a state motto continues to rapidly disintegrate.

    • This is how you know that you spend too much time reading and thinking about queer things that are relevant to your interests:
      1. When you read VAGINA is for lovers
      2. When you nod to that

  6. I agree with you on the vibrator thing, but imagine this:

    Vibrators
    That look like Sailor Moon weapons.

  10. It makes me deeply sad that there is an adult person on this planet whose life experience has been such that they would actually want to outlaw oral sex.

    I mean come on, unnatural? It’s just bodies, doing things to other bodies.

    I think if Magic-Man-In-The-Sky wasn’t on board with oral -well then why would it feel so fricking awesome?

  13. This is kind of irrelevant, but could we get a slideshow of just girls wearing leather jackets and nothing else on top? Also, third to last picture…

Comments are closed.