Our Outsiders Issue wouldn’t be complete without a roundtable discussing the whens and wheres and hows of having sex outside, and so we asked our team to paint us a little picture of a time they scissored, etc. in the great outdoors.
Monday Roundtable: Sex in the Great Outdoors
I once had sex on the deck of a cruise ship. Unfortunately we were interrupted…moral of the story, even if you donât see any cameras they are DEFINITELY there. If you choose to follow in my footsteps I would definitely advise waiting until the last night of the cruise, otherwise youâll be suffering a lot of awkward stares from the crew for the rest of the week because the entire night shift watched security footage of you getting eaten out.
TRISH.
rachel i will never get over my love for you for a million different reasons but wow, this roundtable contribution is really up there on that list. <3
My roundtable contribution, as recounted to my camp crush just now via text (edited for horrific typos):
“I think my fave outdoor sex activities were:
1) Being eaten out with my head in a bush and my legs in a duck pond in the cemetery in high school;
2) You behind the tents at camp (would have been fine with you in the middle of the hill at camp too đ);
3) Accidentally almost fisting R on The Field;
4) Blowing A on his front porch at like 4 in the morning? He and I had a lot of sex outside, actually. I think once on a trampoline, that was weird.”
Would probably add the time I fucked my friend on a patch of black ice at a Montreal bus stop at 3am as we waited for the night bus. It was…cold.
If I had to make a list of “Worst Music to Have Sex To”, a high school marching band would be at the top of the list. However, I WOULD watch a hilarious, coming-of-age movie about that story.
At a golf course in Hickory, NC on one of the greens. Interrupted by a groundskeeper who kept the spotlight on while we dressed. Not scary at all…
Hahahaha I grew up just up the road from Hickory in Lincolnton
Oof! That would suck.
I would just like to give a hearty bravo to Molly Priddy because I think that’s actually the best case scenario when it comes to outdoor sex? I mean, a freaking meteor shower. That’s the dream.
Also, reason number 4032 why I adore Heather Hogan: “400 miles this girl drove to have sex with me and a clarinet thwarted her.” What an incredible sentence. *chef’s kiss*
(I haven’t had sex outside so I’m just here to cheer on you brave souls…)
I loved these stories, thwarts and all.
I second the joy of sex in a tent, especially when it’s lightly raining outside. Heck I’ve even never minded the tent and just used a poncho as a kind of modesty panel. Amazing what two amorous lesbians hanging out near a picnic table, in the rain, can get up to.
One of my first outdoor sex experiences was in a hay loft which I don’t recommend at all !
The second time I ever had sex was outdoors, with an ex who turned out to be terrible. It was hot, he pulled off the condom, I did NOT orgasm, and I got bug bites all over my back and legs. My current partner and I have fucked in lakes and a pool and I orgasmed each time and maybe it isnât as sanitary but I donât care! Water sex is amazing, I havenât had to worry about condoms for three years, and I donât fake orgasms anymore. âđź
Heather’s story reminded me of this:
I had a high school boyfriend (it’s a caveat I always use since I’m not bisexual but… anyway) he used to like to make out. We used to play tennis on the courts across the street from our high school and one night we were making out in the grass while a football came was happening. My quirky geometry teacher was the announcer at football game and the loudspeakers carried his quirky geometry teacher antics all the way over to the park where we were making out. It was an experience! Not any worse than our typical make outs but I felt guilty like, QGT could see what I was doing!
Thank you, Carolyn!
I always liked the idea of outdoor sex more than the reality. Mostly because rocks. Rocks are everywhere. You might think âhey, that meadow is pretty, weâre pretty, letâs go fuck in that pretty meadowâ but in reality itâs just rocks all the way down.
I also first had sex outdoor sex at A Camp! A couple of times. Very recently. I’ll never look at orange groves the same way…
thanks for that orange grove at a-camp, pals!
BEWARE THE TIDE
This is the advice I need in life, as I am kind of clueless about water-based and water-adjacent activities, sexual and non. Thank you KaeLyn.