Deep in the marrow of the scorching summer of 2023, the first season of The Ultimatum Queer Love was bestowed upon us by Netflix — a bevvy of couples who’d reached a crossroads in their relationship wherein one wanted to get married and the other didn’t and both were willing to allow Netflix to destroy their lives in an effort to resolve this situation.
One of the many humans who participated in Season One, Mal Wright, worked in casting for Season Two and now works here, at Autostraddle/For Them. She shared with me, Riese, in an exclusive impromptu interview just now conducted over Slack, “I really commend the people who decided to participate in the second season, because you watched the first season and still were like, we’re gonna do it. I think that’s a really brave thing to do. You watched the queer people season and the straight people seasons and were still like ‘yeah, I’m gonna do it.‘”
These braver-than-the-marines lesbians will be debuting at the bottom of pride month: The Ultimatum: Queer Love Season 2 will premiere on June 25th, 2025. The first chunk of episodes will drop that day and the next chunk will be bestowed upon us on July 2nd. And yes, somehow famously heterosexual host JoAnna Garcia Swisher is returning for her sophomore season. This is unfortunate considering there are at least 250 queer comics desperate for gigs who would do a really fantastic job hosting this program!
Six queer couples will have the chance to go on dates with all the other people participating in the experiment, pick a new partner, move in with that partner for a “trial marriage” and then reunite for a “trial marriage” with each other, after which they have to decide to either get married or move on. Also everybody will be having their trial marriages in the same apartment building.
Meet The Cast of The Ultimatum Queer Love Season 2
AJ & Britney
together five years // follow aj on insta // follow britney on insta
28-year-old administrative assistant/MC AJ isn’t sure about committing to 27-year-old registered nurse / entrepreneur Britney ’cause she fears Britney is more focused on her business than she is on AJ. The business in question appears to be the VitaLuxx Lounge & MedSpa, which offers vitamin therapy, skin care, weight loss and self-care rituals in a soothing Orlando environment. Britney says her “electric chemistry” with AJ began when they first danced together. Furthermore, Britney has a bunny who has been known to wear a bowtie.
Haley & Pilar
together 10 years
follow pilar on insta // follow haley on insta
These two have been together for ten entire years, which means they’ve been dating since they were 19 years old, apparently meeting as orientation leaders after their first year of college. Haley’s a senior food scientist who “chocolatiers” in her spare time and says her “queer identity was shaped by the viral NoH8 campaign.” Physical therapist Pilar is wary of marriage because she thinks it’s a “societal construct” and also her parents aren’t supportive of her relationship or her sexual orientation. Pilar wants to “embrace her own queerness and pursue her dream of building a career as a gay woman in the male-dominated music industry.” Haley wants to drink filthy martinis and get married already!!!!
Dayna & Magan
together 1.5 years
follow magan on insta // follow dayna on insta
you can watch a little preview trailer of dayna and megan on tiktok
Dayna, 25, is a relationship manager, and Magan, 27, is a business manager, and now Dayna is managing her own relationship and asking Magan to get down to business. Even though Dayna has a self-described avoidant attachment style, she knows she wants to marry Magan! Now! After a year and a half of dating! Unfortunately, Magan is still grappling with her family’s reluctance to accept her queerness which may be playing into some of her hesitations. Also if you want to feel old Dayna’s first queer crush was King Princess which means people whose first queer crush was King Princess are now old enough to give their partner’s marriage ultimatums.
Ashley & Marita
together three years
follow ashley on insta // follow martia on insta
The biggest age gap in a season where all the couples are about the same age, maybe it’s their five year difference that makes Ashley, 30, ready to settle down, and Marita, 25, holding out for something more. Marita loves Ashley, but she feels like Ashley could be a bit grander in her romantic gestures. It’s also interesting that Ashley’s relationship model is Shannon Beveridge and Cammie Scott while Marita’s relationship model is Alex and Marissa on The O.C. Wishing these two the best of luck, but they might want to seek out some new romance examples!
Kyle & Bridget
together 2.5 years
follow kyle on insta // follow bridget on insta
Kyle, a 30 year old graphic designer, is very particular. They describe their ideal date as a beach picnic — with no bugs and no wind. Kyle’s desire to control nature fits with their desire to get going on their marriage plan. Unfortunately, her partner, 27 year old writer/bartender/Aquarius Bridget, doesn’t see the point. They want to be with Kyle for the rest of their lives, but don’t understand why marriage is necessary. (Maybe Kyle should try arguing tax law.) Bridget says she was turned gay as a two year old when she begged her parents to watch Ellen’s “The Puppy Episode” thinking it would be about puppies. A charming anecdote!
Mel & Marie
together four years
follow mel on insta // follow marie on insta
Marie and Mel own a food truck together but Marie is also a butler (I have questions about this) and a bartender as well as “the most extroverted introvert there is.” Marie and Mel have known each other since they were teenagers. Marie is ready to get hitched and pop out some babies and spend more time on the sofa with Mel doing her favorite thing — drinking a glass of wine in a robe and watching The L Word. Meanwhile, Mel says they have some “things” they need to “get in order” before they can drive off into the sunset together or take flights to bougie spots.
Well I wonder what will happen next
Comments
omg i have been waittingggg so long for this, please tell me you all will be recapping, (kayla??)
LOL I’ve seen the oc that shit was short lived bitches!! Olivia Wilde was hot af tho
Once again I can’t believe how young all of these people are. I don’t know very many queers in their twenties who are this horny to get married!
And yes, of course I will be watching.
Wow, happy 30th birthday to me I guess!
Will it still have that straight host is my first question.
Second, where are my fellow Cancers? I’m not an astrology queer but does it say something about my sign that we don’t seem to be giving or receiving ultimatums, at least not in a TV-worthy way?
happy birthday!
maybe the Cancers are too afraid of crying on television or accidentally saying something hurtful and then feeling guilty about it forever and wishing they could ask the producers to edit it out
recaps please!!
also ashley and marita should enter themselves in “dating or related”
i feel like ashley is related to every white lesbian on my kickball team!!
as a virgo…. i endorse this message
I HAVE SO MANY THIUGHTS WHICH I WILL ALL SHARE NOW!!!!
First of all, HOLD UP AUTOSTRADDLE/FOR THEM MAL IS THE ULTIMATUM: QUEER LOVE MAL???? This just exponentially increased my respect for her. Truly one of the only people on that show who didn’t come out of the whole experience looking like a gigantic jackass, but rather as mature and kind. God I feel her on the whole “these people saw season one and still decided to participate” thing. They truly are braver than the marines! And maybe also more (self-)destructive! Did we all watch the same show? These people must know their relationships are going to very publicly and possibly very embarrassingly explode, right???
Second of all, I never watch reality TV but like every other queer person I know I of COURSE watched TU:QL S1, and as someone who was feeling very insecure in my relationship at the time, watching it felt TERRIBLE!!! I hated it and I saw myself in every single dysfunctional insecure asshole move that the participants pulled. I vowed to never watch it again, but lo and behold, I am now happily, nay, ecstatically single, and it’s gemini season, and good lord I can’t fucking wait to gleefully watch people DESTROY THEIR RELATIONSHIPS!!! Freedom for everyone trapped in a relationship with someone who is pressuring them to get married in their twenties! Personal growth for everyone who is stupid and insecure enough to give their partners an ultimatum like this! Messyness and singledom for everybody!!!
I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS WHICH I WILL ALL SHARE NOW!!!! – Best comment. Comment award!
Please share more of your thoughts. I want to hear them all.
Also, I feel you watching the show now being gloriously single after my ex put a lot of pressure on me to become parents together. I also never watch reality TV but saw the first season of the show and will watch the second as well.
This format is so absurd. Why would anyone want their hesitant partner to marry them and pressure them into it with an ultimatum? Don’t you think that will fall on your feet eventually, even/especially if you get married? Relationship problems don’t stop with a wedding, why would someone want that??? Also, why would anyone agree to get married to someone if there is an ultimatum? If someone said to me: “Let’s get married or we’re done,” I believe I would be like “I don’t find an ultimatum a very healthy thing in a relationship, and if you feel this way, I guess that is the end of the road for us.”
I understand people with these struggles don’t want to lose the other person, but maybe splitting up would be the more sensible option if you want so different things in life?
literally the entire premise is nonesnsical!! it’s wild. living with someone you just met for three weeks and then with your partner (who you probably already live with?) for three weeks, all the while being filmed, is like empirically not a good way to figure out if you should get married or not. it does seem to make people who have a lot of anxiety rush into marriage once they have to really consider the possibility of their partner being with someone else
yes! mal is doing HR and AF+ brand partnerships for the company now and she is just as lovely in person as on the show, and when she started here i didn’t feel embarrassed at all about calling her “our king” several times in ultimatum-related writing on autostraddle.com. i actually know a few people who worked in casting for this show and it sounds like it was …. not an easy task to get people to sign on!
the most recent straight season was INSANE and so weird. i feel like we need at least one show like this a year to unite the community
Oh and by the way: INSANE THAT THEY KEPT THE HOST????? Truly this is the reality show of all time.
absolutely wild choice, we deserve an unhinged queer host that will hold the participants to truths in the reunion
yeah there are just SO MANY BETTER OPTIONS in the world
Oh and lastly: Hiii Magan, 27, Taurus, how’s it going, do you want to date someone who will never force you to get married, what’s your workout routine, are you free tonight
Earth signs seem drawn to being on this show!
absolutely screaming that 3 out of 6 ultimatum givers are virgos, thats too fucking funny
So “Queer Love” really is only interested in cis women or AFAB enbies, huh?
Everyone KNOWS the traditional definition of marriage is between one cis woman and one other cis woman — except sometimes the cis women are maybe not cis women but don’t worry the show’s straight host will still refer to them as if they are.
Noticing how many Virgos are the ultimatum givers, and as a fellow Virgo, that tracks LOL
I’ve actually watched the first season of The Ultimatum and found the concept really intriguing, especially how it challenges traditional dating norms. However, I do agree that having a queer host could bring more authenticity and representation to the show. On a lighter note, when binge-watching shows like this, I often grab snacks from Monkey Mart nearby — their variety makes marathon sessions way better!