Carmen’s Team Pick:
I have a huge confession to make: I have never woken up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy. After all, he’s kind of old and he doesn’t even know his own name. I have, however, woken up numerous times feeling like Kanye West.
It’s a kind of invincible feeling — like finally getting the girl, catching the bus you should have missed, making it out of a seemingly impossible situation, or kind of just feeling like the coolest fucking person on Earth. No matter how great you feel, though, feeling like Kanye West is not the same as having his life experiences. For example, Kanye West’s Twitter account is a great daily dose of inspiration, but be warned: imitating Kanye cannot and will not produce the same effects as his own work. Sometimes I tweet long-form Twitter essays in his classic DONDA style. Nobody emails me. Once, I tweeted “I just threw some kazoo on this bitch” and most people just assumed I was daydrinking. And the last time I talked about listening to classical music on Twitter, someone texted me to ask if I was okay.
The only way to truly feel like Kanye online is to be Kanye himself. And now you can.
Galactic Café’s “Life in the West” provides you with a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to experience life as Yeezy. You start by logging in to Twitter with the username kanyewest and from there, you watch as people mindlessly tune into what you say, praise you for talking nonsense about cherub imagery on carpets, and even reward you for using too many ellipses.
The game also allows you to tweet – but the object of the game is to tweet Kanye’s own wisdom, and not your own spin on it. Only the right letters will type out in the message, until you have one of Kanye’s signature sayings next to the “Tweet” button. You basically just type gibberish until something moving comes out, kind of like the king himself.
It’s like practice for being a superstar rapper, an exercise in self-indulgence, and a waste of time at work all at once. In short, it’s amazing.
Eventually, you’ll wake up feeling more like Kanye West everyday. And that can’t ever be a bad thing.
alright this kanye business has got to stop.
irritating = these posts>his persona>his music. so congrats on that.
also, drake. STOP.
may i suggest a personal blog for your interests?
oh gawd
I know, I just saw this. I gave short, concise feedback. But, oh gawd was good, too.
I’ve got to agree with finkle here, Kanye is a douchebag and his music is lame. I too, believe this should go to a personal blog. Only a few people seem to be interested in these particular articles, as the comment section will verify that. There are many artists out there that deserve attention and have a wonderful personality to boot.
i think this is funny and enjoyed this post.
The first two comments make me sad. I think of Autostraddle as such a welcoming place for all types of diverse interests. I understand a reader not being interested in the post, you are free not to choose to click on it! Writing such rude comments about someone else’s interests is not in line with the community that I see here. :^(
This made me sad, too. Guys, you gotta remember that these aren’t just avatars or a faceless corporation you’re bitching at. The people at Autostraddle put something awesome together for us, and you can tell they actually care…Some of the articles here that I thought would be stupid introduced me to stuff that I never knew I liked. Not everything is going to be relevant to everyone.
Not interested in Kanye? Easy. Don’t click on it.
i’m very appreciative of everyone at autostraddle. i love this site, so it’s a bit like being in a relationship and expecting someone to be a certain way. and then they’re not. and then it’s a big deal.
Here’s the deal on that. The “team pick” is actually just that. It allows our writers to offer up things that are relevant to THEIR interests. So many times, as in a good relationship, you might not be interested or even like what the other person likes. That’s ok.
Read what you just wrote. It’s unsettling. And weird. You might want to consider that.
I understand what you mean, but it’s not that this is a matter of diverse interests- it’s the opposite actually. many articles have been written about or have included this guy recently, and he’s not particularly relevant to the community’s interest. there’s no reason to be dwelling on this dude. let’s move on to better things, shall we?
and yes, everyone is free to click on whatever article they like, and i do ignore ones like these. but the fact is that they are increasing and seeping into other articles i am reading, and it’s annoying as fuck.
i want to say something before this turns into autostraddle: your shitty rapper appreciation community.
i’m sure this conversation is more or less over by now, but i’m just gonna put it out there and say that i think what you’re arguing is untrue.
autostraddle posts about some very legitimate-ass female rappers, probably at least once a month in recent history. sometimes we indulge in guilty pleasures. but you can’t call out the later without acknowledging the former. that’s just selective memory, and it’s unfair.
Still weird.
two of my buttons flew off during my never ending inspirational moment
I like it a lot. I feel powerful in a really useless way.
I too enjoyed this post. I think one of the best things about autostraddle is there can be an article on something you didn’t really know you cared about until you read it. Or maybe that’s just me?
But anyway, keep up the good work Carmen!
Well look at the irony. The first two comments are certainly channeling their inner douche. You know you don’t like Drake or Kanye so ignore articles involving those topics. A lot of people on this site love to pretend be all loving and accepting until these omnipotent beings of morality disagree with something then all gloves are off. GTFO.
Also what makes you any authority on good music? I don’t listen to Drake or Kanye or much hip hop/rap music but that doesn’t mean that nobody else shouldn’t listen to it. Again GTFO
you guyssss…
the appearance of the actual gif in this comment is brought to you by the autostraddle community managerettes — and they agree with lilyv
new favorite gif!!!!
i’s say ” and four for you geln coco!!” but i can only give you one ):
I wish something would pop up encouraging me to “tweet that $hit” every time I was ready to tweet something. I’d be all “thank you. I will tweet that $hit.”
It needs to be said- the first two paragraphs are genius and perfect.
thank you.