Welcome to the sixth recap of the first season of Faking It, a gothic horror story from the network that brought you Bam’s Unholy Union and From G’s to Gents.
We open in Amy’s boudoir, where our favorite fake lesbian couple, Karma and Amy, are chatting about that time Karma told that slab of roast beef she has a crush on that they could all enjoy a little three-way summer cabbage together as a family.
What do you mean the comic book store had no more copies of Lumberjanes?!!!
Karma’s got some ‘splaining to do:
Karma: “You know how I thought that Liam pulled away because he wasn’t into me? Turns out he’s way into me, he just felt too guilty sneaking around behind your back. I heard that and I don’t know what came over me, I just -”
Amy: “Suggested a menage a trois?”
Karma: “Don’t worry I’m gonna tell him that I had a brief lapse in sanity. I mean, we couldn’t. We wouldn’t. You wouldn’t.” [pause] “Would you?”
Amy: “No, Karma, I would not have a fucking threesome with you and Liam!”
No Karma it is not okay to use the same glass dildo with multiple partners without washing it
Cut to Blue Oasis in the Heart of Red Texas High School, where the Gay Scouts are enjoying a stroll on the promenade. Shane thinks Amy should TOTALLY have a fucking threesome with Liam.
Girl, I’m telling you I can TOTALLY beatbox, I saw it on Glee
Shane: “Amy, this might as well be a big bi-curious batsignal in the sky. Karma wants you to have sex with her!”
Karma: “With her and a guy!”
Shane: “One does not suggest a threeway with one’s bff all willy-nilly. She has to be into you. In part or subconsciously or whatever.”
Amy tells Shane not to get her hopes up about Karma’s sexual desires and also re-states her lack of interest in honing Liam’s horn. Shane insists no hiding of Liam’s salami will be necessary, ’cause Liam and Amy can both focus on Karma and ignore each other. Shane’s an expert on threeways ’cause he fiddled on more than just the roof at theater camp.
Hell no I’m not scissor-bumping you, dude
Shane: “Trust me, this is the perfect way to see how Karma feels about you!”
To be fair, every girl-boy-girl threesome situation I’ve participated in did eventually turn into a girl-girl twosome situation. Although “eventually” sometimes means like, “a year later.” But also sometimes “eventually” meant “that very same night.” What I’m saying is that ANYTHING COULD HAPPEN. But before we can get too deep into this ish, Karma busts up their private convo and the Shane-Amy-Karma conversational threesome becomes an Amy-Karma conversation twosome. Amy takes a deep breath and lets it out:
Amy: “I think we should do it. The threesome, I mean.”
Karma: “Amy you’d do that for me? Are you sure about this?”
Amy: “If you’re… sure?”
Doesn’t my no-shoulder shirt make you want to lick my shoulders, though?
Then they hug and Amy, knowing that she’s got a little extra leeway now, holds Karma just a little bit longer, and tighter too.
Karma: “Oh my G-d Amy I love you I promise it won’t be weird at all!”
Amy: “I’m not sure that there’s a way around that.”
Affirmative.
Uhhh are you wearing my leather harness to school again because something is poking me
Snap to a room whose identity is currently under contention: Shane says it’s his yoga room, Lauren says it’s her dance studio and I say it’s a room for me to dance around to the Spring Awakening soundtrack in private. Apparently Lauren’s practicing for the Lone Star Big Ranch Steakhouse Supreme Dance Tango Event Hurrah. In fact, she’s currently awaiting the arrival of her dance partner.
Shane: “Ah, Bigot Barbie comes with her own Closet Case Ken.”
Lauren: “Bigot? For the record, I’ve never been anti-gay. I’ve just been anti-you.”
No, FOR YOUR INFORMATION I’ve been told that my vulva smells like a tequila sunrise
Then, Lauren’s dance partner, Pablo, arrives in his Warblers uniform and announces that he’s not a closet case.
What. It’s Versace.
However, Pablo tripped on a nail gun at Habitat For Humanity last weekend which means Lauren’s got no dance partner for the big dancey dance dance! Obvs Shane volunteers, narrowly beating out Bradley Cooper’s character from Silver Linings Playbook for the prized spot on the twosome team.
Pablo: “We don’t have time for an audition montage. Shane’s here, he’s willing — don’t you wanna win?”
And then all of the birds in the entire forest flew right onto my outstretched arms, and that’s when I knew that I was one with nature forever
Snap over to The Metal Lounge, where Liam’s supes nervous to see Amy and Karma in front of his meatface. He splurges water all over himself just thinking about these two ladies scissoring.
G-DDAMMIT RIESE LEFT ANOTHER VODKA-FILLED WATER BOTTLE IN THE FRIDGE AND DID NOT LABEL IT AS SUCH
Karma: “Liam, you remember Amy.”
Liam: “Of course, hello, Amy.”
Amy: “Hey, let’s have a threesome.”
You guys. You guys I just love Amy so much.
I can’t wait to suck his brains out of his head and feed them to the dark lesbian overlord of the underworld for brunch
Anyhow, Liam’s shocked and awed — he’d assumed Karma was just joking and full of empty promises, just like all those other ladies who promised threesomes and never followed through.
Karma: “Well, we’re lesbians. Our word is our bond.”
Amy: “Our people never joke about threesomes. It’s a whole…thing.”
It’s true, we only joke about veganism, moving trucks and Jenny Schecter. Anyhow, Amy says they’re totes sure, if he’s sure, and like, also if they’re both sure, and is he sure though? Or is he unsure? Well here’s the thing: he is absolutely sure, like for sure sure.
Liam: “I just don’t want you to think that I’m some womanizing heteronormative bro dude who’s gonna brag to his buddies. You know, I’m just all for openness and sexual exploration.”
HAHAHA TOO LATE.
Oh wow, soooo it looks like my prescription is ready at Walgreen’s so gotta bounce
Amy’s like okay neat, let’s pick a time. How is Saturday. Everybody feels great about Saturday!
Liam: “Should I bring anything?”
Amy: “A deep fried appetizer sampler, extra calamari.”
Karma: “She’s kidding. This one! Just bring your sexy open minded self.”
Liam says he’s got this all totally under control and will provide all the things.
This girl just can’t get enough of that stainless steel butt plug
Back in the danceathon studio, Pablo and Shane are getting to know each other. Pablo goes to a prestigious Christian prep school and Shane is like, oh wow that’s THE WORST. But Pablo says it’s totally not the worst and he hopes Shane isn’t one of those closed-minded people who hates all Christians.
Well, I’m not saying that I DID sleep with Lance Bass, but I’m also not saying that I DIDN’T
Shane is like no I love spirituality, I just did this GOOP cleanse, and then Pablo is like, omg I also GOOP, and then Lauren and I are both like OMG STOP.
Cut to the principal’s office, where two bros are arguing about a sport involving balls on a field and one of them has a tampon in his nose and Principal Penelope Deliah Fisher is gonna get them a steak to put on that shiner.
I told him ten THOUSAND times that he needs to switch to Diva Cups but he just will not listen!
Liam strolls in on his mobile to totally raid the school’s free condom supply. He’s also leaving Shane a voicemail about his impending threesome. Bro #1 and Bro #2 overhear Liam talking about a threesome and are overcome with BRO DESIRES and must immediately step in to tell Liam he’s gotta go through with this threesome with TWO HOT LESBIANS.
Bro #1: “You’re living every straight guy’s fantasy!”
Bro #2: “Screw Beckham, you’re my hero now.”
Liam: “It probably won’t happen, I don’t even have a place!”
Hey dude if you’re stealing that shit to sell it on the black market then I know a guy who knows a guy, so
The two bros say a bunch of weirdo gross things and I want to stick tampons in their eyeballs. NEXT!
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Downside to A-Camp: Now there are TWO WHOLE EPISODES of this show I haven’t watched yet
“Well, we’re lesbians. Our word is our bond.” That shit killed me.
On another note,from this moment forward I will live my life anticipating the next recap and then the next one then the next one you get the point.
THAT BRA, THO. Clearly, Amy read this article from Bra Week and thought it spoke to her tomboy femme style.
OMG WE HAD THE EXACT SAME THOUGHT
GUYS THAT BRA IS THE SAME ONE THAT EMILY WORE IN PLL!!! Because the two shows have the same costume designer!
My girlfriend also wears this bra. :)
“Amy’s leaving Shane a voicemail about how she’s flipping out about rehearsal because blocking is hard.”
As someone in the theater world, this line is the best. Pretty sure this happens on the reg at rehearsals.
Amy’s facial expressions are perfect. I LOLed a lot at this episode and this recap. I wish episodes are longer though.
I wish they were longer too! If The Foster can be an hour long, I’m pretty sure this can be (minus a shit ton of drama).
So happy that Amy left her tall socks and boots on with her lingerie. Damn girl. Damn.
And on a less objectifying note, everyone was super precious this week and I’m so nervous for the tenuous future of Karmy.
“Shane gives Pablo a quick kiss and dashes off into the sunset as tango music plays in the glorious sun over the earth and sea.”
Hahahaha.
NO: all the gross shit the bros said in this episode
YES: Amy in that badass sexy lingerie/ white tank and boxers
i will probably never watch this show (unless it ends up on netflix), but i these recaps are just the best and i look forward to them more than i look forward to actually watching most shows.
If accessibility is the issue, some episodes are available on the MTV site (may only be in the US, however).
I know now the one gift to offer to my girl who’ll be really to my benefit : that lingerie==> LIBIDO ON
In the teaser for next week, Karma says she was jealous, but I really want more specifics…because wouldn’t it be great if she was jealous that Liam was kissing Amy since she suddenly realized SHE wanted to kiss Amy?!?! Probably not gonna happen since this show has been on for less than one season and that would leave it with nowhere to go, but still, a girl can dream…
I want to be those boxer shorts and tank top! amy manages to be so sweet and so sexy all at the same time. karma? karma’s a bitch.
“To be fair, every girl-boy-girl threesome situation I’ve participated in did eventually turn into a girl-girl twosome situation. Although “eventually” sometimes means like, “a year later.” But also sometimes “eventually” meant “that very same night.”
:D RIESE! OH MY GOD! elaborate?…
I’m more interested to know more about your epic threesome-twosome story than the episode itself.
May be you can find more threesome stories on http://www.womenlookingforcouple.com/ or find matches on the threesome dating site
I feel like it might have gone better if Liam had brought the calamari.
I love this shooooowwwww. Karma’s beautifully confused little face makes me love her. She’s so so confused now, poor baby. And I love that Amy has come into her own and is confident and taking charge of the situation. She knows how she feels about Karma, she’s accepted it, and she’s willing to take a risk to see if Karma might feel the same way.
How an MTV show with a really stupid/offensive-sounding premise has turned out to be such a gem I’ll never understand, but I’m really glad it is what it is.
Amy was so incredibly sexy and sweetly caring with Karma during the threesome scene!
I feel like this episode was actually the most heartbreaking because of Amy’s emotional rollercoaster with Karma. Like, going from her having to help Karma pick out lingerie and seeing that genuine attraction, to having her little gay dream quashed was very poignant this episode.
And then that ending just slayed me. I’m pretty sure Karma will actually be jealous about Liam kissing Amy but will repress it and lash out at Amy for kissing Liam.
Notes on the bros: Bro #1 was Lauren’s boyfriend, and Bro #2 IS a fucking idiot if he thinks Beckham is the best soccer player of all time. It was also uncharacteristic of Liam to receive tips for sex but the whole thing was awful and gross so whatever let them all burn together.
I completely agree with your prediction about Karma’s reaction. I think she might be bi, so I think she will be jealous of Liam for kissing someone else and Amy for kissing someone else and for Liam/Amy kissing each other, but she will only express her jealousy at first about Liam and not Amy.
I registered just so I could tell you how much I love your recaps :)
aw thank you!!!
The captions this week – perfection.
The kissing scene gave me so many feels
I had so many butterflies in my stomach, and my no-no parts were screaming YES-YES!
I had butterflies in my no-no parts and my stomach was screaming “Feed me tacos already!”
^ comment award
Clearly those kids have never watched Gossip Girl or been graced with the wisdom of Blair Waldorf, because otherwise they would have known the single most important rule about having a threesome: The third person is always a stranger!
I was already loving Amy and Karma’s sexual tension in their undress rehearsal scene (haha, get it?). But then that last scene went and stole all of my Karmy feelings!
That last scene changes everything! It was obvious to me by the end of it that Karma also has feelings for Amy. All of those emotion-laden looks between the two of them. The multiple passionate kisses. The fact that Karma and Amy said the same “Wow.” “I know.” that they said during their first kiss. Except this time Karma was the one flustered and feeling the attraction for the first time, and Amy was the one leading and confident about her feelings.
What if everything is different than it first appeared? What if this whole time Karma has had feelings for Amy too? Feelings that she has been denying and shoving, keeping everything inside without realizing it because she’s not emotionally ready to recognize it and deal with it yet. So she became completely consumed with her genuine feelings for Liam to help her ignore any of her unwanted feelings for Amy. Because not everyone is able to start accepting their sexuality as quickly as Amy has been doing. For some people, it’s a long internal struggle. It could explain a lot of the conflicting comments that Karma has made. It could also help make sense of her character’s motivations, which so far have seemed pretty shallow and selfish.
“The fact that Karma and Amy said the same “Wow.” “I know.” that they said during their first kiss. Except this time Karma was the one flustered and feeling the attraction for the first time, and Amy was the one leading and confident about her feelings.”
Oooooh, excellent plot development having them mirror the initial scene!! I didn’t even pick up on that.
This is exactly what I thought!!!! After Karma didn’t “go all the way” with Liam in the car, I just assumed that MTV was going to flip it on us and have Karma be the one “faking it.” How i see it… Karma is the only one “faking” (read: denying) emotions/deeper connections, while Amy has accepted her feelings and is trying to navigate through them.
I was going to politely and constructively rant about how this episode is disappointing to me, because it is making the concept of a “threesome” look totally sketchy, and because the notion of “consent” is really blurred here, and because this is hypersexualising bisexual/gay girls in a “seen 100 times before” way and that is totally upsetting…
But then I scrolled past pics of Amy in that black underwear. Fuck, this show is great!
As much as I love Amy (dear g-d she is wonderful), I was a little concerned about her “making” Karma want her to stay. The line was getting a bit blurry. I totally understood where Amy was coming from, I just didn’t want that whole dynamic to enter the show.
Yes! I agree. I do realise Amy actively consented to the threeway verbally two or three times, which is technically consent, but both girls were getting into a threeway for the wrong reasons (like, way wrong!) and it bugged me.
Not my best episode. That black lingerie though.
So I was with this “straight” girl a while back (oops), and the first time we had sex, she was like “woah.” And I was like “I know!” Seriously, this show has made my feelings crawl on out of wherever they were buried like some kind of Alison DiLaurentis :p
The end of the season…. we will cut to Karma in her bedroom looking down on her desk staring at two pictures: one of Liam the other, Amy. The camera will zoom in on her face and it will be contorted and then she’ll turn both pictures over only to cut the night lamp off and get in the bed leaving us to wonder until the next season begins.
Watch.
I still hate this show and the sexualization of them/their relationship but that lingerie (Marlies Dekkers?!) is awesome.
I didn’t like the fact that Amy kissed Liam back and looked like she’s into it, despite Shane’s earlier words that she wouldn’t have to touch him if she didn’t want to. She reciprocated his advances, nothing suggested in the slightest that she’s off-put by it, quite the contrary, she even wrapped her hand around him.
I fear that the exact reason why she did it won’t be addressed at all in next episodes, and nothing will be resolved when it comes to Amy’s sexuality at the end of the season. Which most likely would mean that there will be a guy for her next season (even if at the very end she would end up with Karma).
So, it would be show about lesbians without any lesbian representation. Plus, if Amy turns out to be bisexual after all, then apparently the show wants to imply that she’s the one that Liam “conquered” (reference to Liam’s actor’s words from interview: “I conquered the lesbian. She’s mine”), considering she was not into kiss with Oliver before.
I’m possibly projecting based on my experiences many many many moons ago, but I feel like Amy went ahead and kissed Liam back to overcompensate — to her, kissing Liam was a totally emotionless act, a duty she had to perform in order to ensure Karma didn’t suspect Amy was a lesbian or that Amy wasn’t totally down with the threesome about to ensue. It also ensured that she’d be allowed to stay — if Liam wanted to kiss her too, she wouldn’t have to fake food poisoning and leave the room, missing a chance to kiss Karma again.
It also struck me as a very My So-Called Life’s Rayanne Graff/Jordan Catalano & The L Word’s Alice/Lara situation.
It could be an explanation (though I must point out that Amy wouldn have to not think clearly if she thought that making out with Liam would make Karma want her to stay, considering the fact she basically told her she wants him all for herself, but that’s possible), but it’s personal interpretation.
As I checked, there are many different interpretations of that scene, including ones from people who see in it a proof that Amy’s bisexual or that “sexuality is fluid” (as always, only when it comes to queer women apparently).
I fear it will be left for personal interpretations, that the show itself won’t explain anything, that Amy won’t directly address why she behaved like she behaved.
If that’s the case, I’m sure Amy won’t come out as anything at the end of the season. And honestly, I don’t see any reason for prolonging her state of confusion about her sexuality for two seasons other than at best, treading waters – to check out audience’s response (so, if audience didn’t want Amy as a lesbian, but wanted her for example with Oliver, that’s who Amy would be next season). But I can’t say I respect people who would do such a thing, because it means it’s just cold calculated exploitation, so even if Amy would quickly turn out to be lesbian next season, she would probably still go through the usual trope of “lesbian sleeping with a man”, since for some reason this stuff seems to be actively encouraged by the networks (in NBC Dracula the victorian lesbian character who didn’t understand her sexuality and was talked into sleeping with a guy, during the execution of the episode in which, as it has been written in script, she was meant to look like she was traumatized by the sex, ended up looking like she enjoyed it very much and even had strong orgasm – show’s creator himself explained that was what happened and that it has been done against his and writers’ intentions).
I could be wrong, but have to mention that I actually predicted that in episode 4 when she was supposed to find out if she’s into girls she will end as “she’s only gay for her” for now. So with such premise, they can do whatever they want with her sexuality in the future.
And hearing about threesome, I predicted it won’t work out, but during it there will be something to insinuate that maybe Amy doesn’t so totally dislike sexual contact with men, though it will be ambiguous.
I’m also really curious if they address in next episode, after the school found out about the threesome, the fact they’re supposed to be lesbians and wanted to have sex with a man. Because till now both of them kissed men in public and no one found it weird.
Not to mention that I’m stil waiting for Liam ever being called out for wanting to “conquer” lesbian.
Those are really damaging stereotypes about lesbian sexuality – that “we’re all about teh feelings, but for real sex a man is needed”, that we’re not ‘really’ gay, like gay men (who, as TV shows, would never touch a woman in sexual way without feeling revulsion), that we don’t mind d*ck from time to time, and this show intentionally or not refers to it, but I haven’t seen till now these myths being really called out and ridiculed.
Sorry to bring that to you guys, but there is sneak peak from next episode showing the discussion of Amy and Shane about that whole kiss situation, and it’s even worse than I predicted. Amy describes kissing Liam in very ambiguous way, making it look like it was quite nice, just that it paled compared to kiss with Karma (but hey, she’s in love with her, right?).
So yeah, they made guy who wants to “conquer” lesbian be the first man she enjoyed kissing at all. Just great.
Freshman year of college, my ex-BFF did to me basically the EXACT THING that Karma does to Amy (“let’s make out to impress the boys at this party, it’s cool cos neither of us are actually gay”) and it fucked up my baby dyke self so bad. I relate to Amy so much.
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