Taylor’s Team Pick:
Hey, remember when we all watched Friends? I have no idea why we did, but it’s an immutable fact so don’t go trying to deny it. Well, some clever and enterprising individual has compiled ever single homo-offensive, homophobic, or just plain awkward homosocial moment in the show’s entire run into 50 minutes and now it’s on YouTube! It’s pretty epic to watch all in one go, so you might want to make a drinking game or have a friend nearby to punch gently.
don't they look so nice they would probably never hate you
From Bitch’s writeup and interview with video editor/creator Tijana Mamula:
“The whole point of this project is to show the very extent to which homophobia pervades the show, and how it changes over the years. It only makes sense to do this if you can give an idea of the scope of the issue. Otherwise it would have been like, ‘Oh look, there’s twelve homophobic jokes in Friends.’”
There is, in fact, ninety minutes’—a whole movie!—worth of homophobic jokes in Friends, as she found. But with some guidelines, and editing with a sitcom-narrative in mind, Mamula cut it down to forty-five. The result was Homophobic Friends, which is not embeddable, but you can find it on Youtube.
Mamula’s montage doesn’t just treat you to an onslaught of eye-searing ’90s fashion. There’s Ross berating his ex-wife’s new girlfriend (at one point Susan literally saying “We’re getting married” cues the laugh track), Steve Zahn’s character “coming out” as straight (clearly hilarious because things are hard for teh straightz), and approximately one gazillion “no homo” moments between Chandler and Joey. And it’s not just homophobia, there’s the transphobia played for laughs when Chandler learns his father has been living as a woman for some time, and lots of gender policing—often from Ross. “I’m just not that comfortable with a guy as sensitive as you,” Ross says to Sandy, a straight male nanny (played by Freddie Prinze Jr.), firing him for basically threatening Ross’s masculinity. “That’s fair,” responds Sandy, a typical response from the queer, or perceived-as-queer characters of Friends, who are written to rarely react defiantly, or insulted, or taken aback at the blatant ignorance hurled their way.
And that’s the thing—Mamula’s aim wasn’t to bring attention to Friends’ wealth of lazy jokes, but their sheer pervasiveness of the show’s epic run. “Homophobic Friends [is not an] attempt to ridicule the underlying homophobia, but rather strives to bring this attitude to the viewer’s attention in all of its apparent normality.”
Thanks to Taylor’s pal Eliot for the link to the vid!
Um… the link appears to be broken
thx!
I literally only watched 5 episodes of friends my whole life. NO FOR REALS I’M SERIOUS.
Watching irritating, straight rich white people having jobs or looking for jobs and having sex or really wanting sex or being really, really sucky human beings or being really, really boring human beings never really floated my boat.
Haven’t watched the vid yet, but I’m guessing it’ll be 50 minutes or “Hey dude I love you”
AUDIENCE LAUGHS LOADS
“wait but I’m not gay”
AUDIENCE LAUGHS LOADS
“sure you’re not gay!”
AUDIENCE LAUGHS! LAUGHS SO MUCH! SO MUCH THEY CAN HARDLY CONTAIN THEMSELVES!!! THIS IS SO FUNNY LAUGHING JUST WON’T DO IT! I MUST SCREAM! WHOOOP! CHEER FOR THIS GLORIOUS JOKE! AHA!!! AHA HA HAA!!!
Nope, not true. The guys on this show are surprisingly sensitive. Since there is three of them, they argue over who is more of who’s best friend. If one is left out of something, he gets mad and offended. Joey and Chandler hug sooo much that in one episode, there’s about a 30 second montage of all their best hugs over the series… lol. They aren’t homophobic at all. There’s a big difference between making light jokes that apply to the gay issues being realistically portrayed in the show and being actually homophobic…
Here’s the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SsQ5za-J6I8
I love Friends with a fiery passion and I have the strong suspicion that this video will make me sad.
me too :(
me three ::sigh::
Y a mi…I love friends :/
yeah. i feel like autostraddle is always posting really upsetting shit i wouldn’t know about otherwise?
I love Friends! I have the entire series on box set and I watch it all the time! I wouldn’t say it’s overly anti-homo or anything like that. They make tons of jokes about everything, which, of course, includes gay subjects but it’s not in a bad way? Like never in a mean way. None of it has ever offended me and I get offended over little things… lol.
For instance…
Ross’ ex-wife leaves him for a woman and they all attend their wedding and encourage Ross to give his ex “away” when her homophobic parents boycott the wedding. She gets jitters and wants to call it off but Ross talks to her about how much she loves her new girlfriend and how it is about the two of them, and not her parents.
Also Ross and his ex get pregnant before they split but the baby is born once the mom is already with her new girlfriend… All three parents are there for the birth. Yeah, Ross had issues at first and there are balancing issues for the three parents but that is what would really happen, it was handled fairly realistically, and he completely comes around…
Also their son plays with a Barbie his moms’ gave him and his dad is weirded out by it and tries to get him to play with “manly” toys… and all of his friends think he is being an ass about it and that he should let his kid play with the barbie he loves so much.
Joey and Chandler get mistaken for boyfriends and don’t freak out, just correct the lady that they’re not a couple. In fact, when Chandler says they’re not, Joey looks all disappointed and asks why Chandler seemed so offended by that and Chandler says, “We are not having this conversation again.” And that’s that.
There’s many other examples that I can think of… Gay issues and topics are included throughout the entire series and yes, they are joked about but the show is a comedy and everything is joke. Nothing every really struck me as super offensive or anything or in bad taste or mean-hearted at all… I guess I’ll have to watch this youtube video and see if when it’s all condensed, it gets somehow more offensive…
Remember, though, in the early 90’s… portraying a lesbian wedding on a beloved prime-time TV show was pretty ballsy. In fact, Carol and Susan are the longest running lesbian couple on TV, actually, lasting the entire 10 years without splitting up or anything like that.
I agree with your points on their occasional positive portrayal of lesbians, but you’re missing the point that the majority of the negative instances involved *underlying* homophobia. Rarely did they make any jokes that could be deemed outright hateful or shockingly offensive, but Ross’s character for example consistently makes (often small) comments that perpetuate ridiculous stereotypes about homosexuality and gender.
I think the point of the video is to show how this sort of ‘light’ sexuality or gender-based humour completely permeated the show, and it may not be deemed outright offensive by many gay people but it presents a world view which demeans gay men as well as any man who doesn’t conform to standard gender roles.
True, but most of the time it is Ross who is the butt of the joke for his unprogressive, homophobic comments.. the audience laughs at him for his small-mindedness, not with him.
Thank you for this! I agree, Friends was actually a pivotal show in portraying lesbian characters. Sure, looking at it now, it seems like the jokes are bigotrous, but its not fair to judge it by today’s media standards. I will be a Friends fan forever and refuse to consider it homophobic in any way!!
I have never watched Friends. Never.
Now I’m pretty sure my roommates refer to me as “that weirdo who never watched Friends.” But it’s true.
I’ve always hated Friends. This just strengthens my file of evidence.
and after reading http://bitchmagazine.org/post/ill-be-there-for-you-but-not-in-a-gay-way-homophobic-friends i see that the editor of the video has similar feelings, at least in the end: “The whole thing was a useful exercise in terms of training me to pay more attention to the subtexts of these mainstream shows. That is, this vague feeling of discomfort and hostility that I’d always had watching Friends (or other like-minded shows) crystallized into something that was analyzable.”-Tijana Mamula
I definitely recommend reading the creator’s analysis. I got about fifteen minutes in and didn’t see anything especially offensive. Turns out, that’s kinda the point.
Of course I didn’t get to any clips featuring Chandler’s trangender parent. I’m betting those (like the one random transmisogynistic joke in a sea of gay jokes I did see) it is wayyy worse.
I read the creator’s comment: “The homophobic jokes, as they appear in the original series, are never violent and most often are not even openly denigratory; rather, they purport to offer an honest and “good-humored†representation of a common, socially sanctioned stance towards homosexuality. Situated within the wide array of jokes in any single episode, this homophobia tends to avoid provoking either aversion or anger, and instead prompts the viewer to be swept away by the hilarity of the situations.”
To me, it doesn’t make a difference. From what I saw so far (I;ll watch the rest of the video later), Friends is not, even subtly, trying to force a specific view or stance of homosexuality. And I think it’s worth noting, that just because a character on Friends may say something homophobic, that doesn’t mean the show is endorsing the message. For instance, when Ross says to his ex-girlfriend’s wife, “Hey, I don’t remember you producing any sperm,” it’s clearly heterosexist, but without seeing the rest of the show play out, how do we know Ross didn’t changed his mind that Susan’s wife is equally a parent or if others on the show reprimanded Ross for his attitude. Sometimes you need to present the wrong behavior to show it being corrected. Yes, Ross’ line was played up for laughs, but I thought we were supposed to believe (and maybe I am wrong and only interpreting this as a lesbian) that Ross was being unreasonable about his situation with Susan.
I also think that in that particular instance it’s perfectly understandable that Ross would say something along those lines, not as a homophobe but as a normal person.. we are told that it’s not been long since he split up with his wife, he’s still in love with her and hurt about the situation, it’s not surprising he would lash out at his wife’s new partner, who he sees as encroaching on his family.
Oh my gosh. I just watched the first three minutes and turned it off… a lot of that stuff was seriously reaching. Ross using the word lesbian in a conversation with his lesbian wife he recently split with his homophobic? Chandler saying he wishes he was a lesbian is somehow bashing gays? A lot of that stuff was really, really reaching. News flash: mentioning gay things in a funny way on a comedy that has a major gay story line is not homophobic.
End of rant. I love Friends… so this got me all worked up. Ha. I always tell people the opposite about this show… how it was inclusive and made light jokes the way they make light jokes about everything else on the show. Seeing that that inclusion is now considered “homophobic” was shocking to me.
I absolutely agree. It was definitely reaching!
Anything that mentions gay people does not make it homophobic. I laugh at gay jokes all the time as long as they are not offensive and derrogatory!
“Just so you know, I am okay with the gay thing…”
He is OKAY with it?! Why does that make it offensive towards gay people? Its funny because Chandler isn’t gay, not because Friends is making fun of gay people.
I also remember always thinking that friends was AHEAD of its time when it came to this kind of thing. It had 2 supporting characters who were lesbians and seeing as the majority of the seasons took place in the 90’s and very few sitcoms had reoccurring lesbian characters at this time (and even now its more common for gay men then women to be regularly featured) I always thought this made it more accepting then other shows. As a child watching friends, it was my first inside look into a lesbian relationship. I would say thats worth giving them some credit!
Also, sitcoms that are extremily popular and accepting now (ie. Modern Family) make gay jokes constantly. Mitchell and Cams constant debate over who is the most feminine, their Dad always being a little uncomfortable about Cams physical affection, falling into direct gay stereotypes etc etc. We dont need to be so sensitive about even MENTIONING gay people or we will never be satisfied with the way we are portrayed in the media.
I watched one episode of Friends in highschool because I had to. My then best friend was staying over one night, and she insisted we watch it because it was the final week of the final season. I don’t even remember what happened in the episode. All I could remember thinking was, “How did such an unfunny show last so long?”
I’ll stick to Golden Girls and Frasier reruns.
Like a lot of comedy shows (or drama shows for that matter) it ran out of steam towards the end, so not surprising you had that reaction. I remember watching later episodes of MASH as a kid and not finding it remotely funny and then years later saw the very first series and it was hilarious. First couple of series of Friends were very good and I agree with the poster above who is a fan, I recall the series seeming pretty progressive for the time and the lesbian ex-wife was always treated as a real person. In fact, the degree to which it became clear that Ross was a bizarre creep was one of the more fascinating parts of the show to me.
I swear some people go out of their way to be offended. I can’t imagine how you even make it through the day.
Wut? I don’t understand how those scenes are homophobic or offensive. Plus, Friends made fun of everything, including themselves. Hm.
I got six minutes and didn’t think any of it was homophobic. I never watched Friends, but I always thought the show was pretty gay positive, what with them having a lesbian wedding on the show and the Friends genuinely being OK with gays on the show. It’s interesting as a fun montage of all the gay stuff from Friends; an expose on homophobia in Friends, it is not.
I never liked it much when it was on….my best friend (a straight guy) started watching it recently and tried to get me into it….normally we have the same taste in TV, but I could not get past the first episode or two…. Not because it was homophobic but because it was so heterofocused…..
Boring. Don’t these people have more interesting things happening in their lives?
From the first few minutes of the clip though I am not sure I’d qualify the show as homophobic….it’s a question of insider vs. outsider humour….
where is an aggressive commenter when you need one…
somebody named ‘bullshit’,’this sux’ or ‘fuck this’ should stop by and yell a lil’.
BECAUSE FRIENDS IS AWESOME.I loved it while growing up.
ok,yes there are some gay related jokes.but there are also jokes about men.there are jokes about women.jokes about italians.jokes about old people. young people.middle aged people.simple people.well educated people.people with ocd. people with too much product in their hair.and so on.
its a comedy.watch it.laugh.
lol those posters terrify me sometimes
don’t summon them
Could the maker of this video BE more easily offended?!
^^ THAT was FANTASTIC! Kudos.
look at me, I’m Chandler. could I BE wearing any more clothes?
I think this makes a similar point much better:
http://thesocietypages.org/socimages/2011/01/09/black-people-on-friends/
this.
I will never forget Aisha Tyler.
I don’t recall the show being racist, like at all, so I don’t think it’s really the same. but still, good link, bc man was that show white! really really white! not something I ever noticed, probs bc I am white, and I guess not something I thought about in the height of my Friends obsession.
Of course you wouldn’t realize how white the show was (being based in NYC for fucks sakes) being white yourself, it takes a special kind of white person, well awareness in general to realize that shit. Thank god for awareness being a learned trait :D!
But seriously, Aisha Tyler.
*honk honk*
I forgot to add that in there.
I agree. I feel like a LOT of white people don’t realize how white a very large portion of mainstream media is.
Another issue related to this, I feel, is that any time you have a show or movie with multiple characters from minority groups, either racial minorities, religious minorities, sexual minorities, disabled people, etc., you have white people out in force claiming it’s ‘contrived’, or they’re just using ‘token characters’ even when the characters in question are clearly well-developed characters who are clearly not stereotypical token characters.
You also end up with people asking, “Well, why does this character HAVE to be black? Why does this character HAVE to be Muslim? Why does this character HAVE to be gay? Why does this couple HAVE to be interracial? Why does this character HAVE to be deaf? Why does this character HAVE to be paralyzed?”, etc, because straight, abled white people who date other straight, abled white people are ~obviously the default. Characters have to have a REASON for being black. Or being disabled. Or being Jewish. Or liking girls instead of boys. They can’t have just been born that way~. There has to be a REASON this character isn’t automatically white or abled or straight or the same as every single other character on the show, apparently. I’d bet you a dollar that people have rarely, if ever, uttered the words, “Oh my god, why did Ron Weasley HAVE to be a ginger?”
I’ve read claims of shows, or films, “going out of their way to add minority characters.” Wow, what a horrible thing! It can’t just be that some people want what they write to reflect, I don’t know, real life. I know I do. I’d feel absolutely ridiculous writing only white characters just because I’m white. That wouldn’t reflect my life, or the world we live in.
Do I write minority characters? Yes, of course. Am I ‘going out of my way’? Absolutely not. I feel like creating well-developed, complex, and interesting characters is a relatively deliberate action already. You spend a lot of time figuring out who they are, where they come from, what makes them the way they are. The very act of creating a character, any character, is already ‘going out of your way’, in a manner of speaking–but it’s necessary to any good story.
Even if a writer is making a point of including minority characters, I don’t feel like it’s necessarily going out of their way. Most elements of a story are very intentional with a lot of thought put behind them. Why should who your characters are and how your readers or viewers will relate to them be any different? Why should their cultural backgrounds, which influence them as people, be any different? Personally, it drives me nuts that such a huge majority of media is so white, so straight, etc. It’s something I constantly notice, and something I make a point to avert in my own writing. Even with more gay media than ever before, I still feel constantly left out and media portrayals of LGBT people still leaves a LOT to be desired. And it’s hard to rarely see people in mainstream media and pop culture who reflect who you are.
Another example is Mike and Tina on Glee. It seems like most of what they talk about is being Asian, which is played for laughs, but when you consider it, it’s pretty depressing. I feel as if, largely, their characters haven’t been developed enough past being Asian, though similar could be said for many characters on Glee since most characters are purposely a walking stereotype. But have you ever met someone who says their favorite character is Mike? I highly doubt it when you have more complex characters that have been developed much further, even as characters purposely written to reflect stereotypes.
I don’t need a lesbian’s entire life to be about loving ladies to be happy with a story–just having gay lady who isn’t just playing into stereotypes or playing up their lesbianism, usually their only identifiable character trait. Just having people be people who happen to be gay or happen to be Asian, etc., but also, on the flip side, don’t go out of their way to never mention their race or cultural background or sexuality, goes a long way on its own. Unfortunately, those representations are few and far between for most minority characters, it seems.
….this wasn’t originally going to be a novel. And now I’m wishing I could have used this towards my NaNoWriMo word count.
I have lots of feelings.
I also have lots of cherry coke coursing through my bloodstream.
i love this comment, and i love cherry coke.
Cherry Coke is going to be my life-force this month. I can feel it.
I wanted to give sexy leg-hugs of friendship to your comment and I love cherry coke too :D
Damn, I’ve never really watched much of “Friends,” but it seems like it might as well be called “Gay Panic, the TV Show.” Everyone’s afraid that they might be gay, or be perceived as gay, or that their partner is gay. It seems like every LGBTQ person on the show is deceiving or was deceiving a partner (Susan, Chandler’s dad, Phoebe’s husband, Emily the girl that Ross mentioned was going to a poetry reading with Susan, even though he thought she was straight). It’s like, “Holy shit, ANYONE could be gay!” But that doesn’t stop them from making subtle jabs about it all the time. Sure, it’s not overly offensive, but I think the moment when the laugh track comes on after Susan says she and Helen are getting married speaks volumes. It’s just like, “Here, we’ll give you a couple of gay characters, but we’ll never take them seriously.” Ultimately, that’s always been the criticism made about “Friends,” it seems. Its straight, fairly well-off white cis characters are the centerpiece of the show, and everything else seems to be irrelevant.
ive never found this show homophobic. but then again i love it SO SO much.
After watching the video it seems as if the show had more of an issue of gender stereotyping. So many of the scenes that the video showed were of people thinking Chandler was gay, or of questions of sexuality based on non gender conforming behavior. They don’t ever really suggest that being gay or a lesbian is a bad thing.
And while there are some issues with both Ross’s acceptance of lesbianism and Chandler’s acceptance of his father’s trans identity, they are more about the character accepting it, and not that either the father or ex have done something wrong.
In my rose-colored glasses view, I’d like to think that all the careless homophobia and transphobia as well as assertion of traditional gender roles is a mark of those times. Meaning that no show of this kind of overwhelming popularity would think of saying some of the things said in there, especially with Ross’s character, without making it very clear that there is something wrong with that view. But I don’t know… I still get shocked sometimes. Haha, I’m shocked every time. For some reason, I keep thinking we live in enlightened times, that Friends (and its homophobia and resolute heteronormativity) is something that belongs to the past, and we all know better now. One day.
(Incidentally, I always find it interesting that in Word documents, and in this comment box, the word “heteronormativity” is underlined in red, and is apparently not a word, even though it’s been in use since 1991.)
For what it’s worth, I don’t think the point of this remix was “Friends was such a homophobic show” but rather to make a statement about how being gay is viewed and treated in Western culture.
Well it fails on that account too because I think Friends was actually more gay positive than shows of its time. I was in grade school when the show started (and in college when it ended, man that show had a long run) and I remember my Catholic school sending a letter home to parents that kids shouldn’t be allowed to watch Friends because of all sex and gay people and stuff. The jokes poke fun at the characters insecurities and, yes, use cultural norms for laughs, but gay people aren’t the butt of the jokes. The characters always come around to acceptance, like Ross with Susan and Chandler catching himself saying that if he were gay he could get an attractive boyfriend. I’m pretty sure other shows in that time probably weren’t so kind to gays. Many shows, I suspect ignored their existence altogether, I’m sure others treated gay like it was a bad thing and I’m also sure many relied on negative stereotypes for laughs. Friends doesn’t seem to do that. Susan and her partner look like perfectly average, feminine women. That’s some of the jokes — how did Ross not know? The joke is Ross is looking for stereotypes for a retroactive hint, but the show makes it clear there’s no test, Susan is just a normal lady who happens to be gay. I don’t think other shows were so progressive. But I never watched many sitcoms throughout my life.
One of my close friends is VERY obsessed with Friends and I’m pretty sure she’s spent the better part of the day composing a lengthy rebuttal to this video…
I can’t wait to hear our friend’s opinion on the topic. I’m totally with her on it. A lot of these jokes are given without context, and WITH the context of everything that’s happening, it’s really not homophobic. Really, the fact that they are bringing up topics such as two lesbians getting married, and Chandler being perceived as gay are pretty interesting, and not something a lot of other shows would really do at the time.
Yeah I was thinking the same thing, actually. I mean, a lot of those jokes ARE meant to seem ridiculous and I always felt the reason why Joey and Chandler’s “no homo” jokes were funny was because it was so ridiculous how paranoid they were. We laughed AT them.
And I always found Chandler’s character and hang-ups and problems fascinating, especially his struggle with being perceived as gay, “having a quality”, and his frustration in dealing with society’s stereotyping.
I don’t know. I think there was more to what was going on in that show than simple heteronormativity and a pervasive homophobia. I think they were trying to go places. For having started almost twenty years ago, I appreciate where they did go.
Yeah, I really can’t stand when people refuse to see things in context. This is all reminding me of an article I read a few years ago from Shakesville about the movie Superbad, where they condemned it as “rape-apologist” – based on comments made by Seth, you know, the character the audience is supposed to find douchey and unsympathetic (at least, for the bulk of the film). I don’t understand why people can’t understand when a writer wants you to agree with a character and when they don’t. It’s not even a matter of the character being a villain – good writing usually means even some sympathetic characters make mistakes and learn from it.
I am actually annoyed by this video! I watched the first 20 minutes and found nothing offensive in it. They make jokes based on stereotypes mostly, and really in Friends ANYTHING is subject to a few jokes. It was actually one of the more pro-LGBTQ shows of the time.
I’ve watched the whole of the series about 10 times in my life, never saw a homophobic thing. And now, while actually TRYING to spot it, and pretending I was hypersensitive to offensive material, I still see nothing.
If the point of the video was to point out actually homophobia, it failed horribly. And if it wasn’t, it should really have a different name. Like “All-the-moments-in-friends-containing-gays-or-vague-gay-references” or something.
I think it’s a shame the author of the video titled it ‘Homophobic Friends’. As other commenters mentioned, Friends suffered much more from gender-stereotyping issues (which became homophobic by association) than outright homophobia. The title suggests some sort of shocking exposé but in reality it just shows how these sort of gender discourses (men shouldn’t be physically affectionate with each other; men shouldn’t take an excessive amount of care over their appearance, etc) are so embedded in western and particularly Hollywood culture. It’s especially interesting to see how pervasive they are that a lot of people on this website can’t see anything problematic with them.
Of course plenty of more recent comedies use similar jokes but I’m always struck when I re-watch Friends just how often they bring up this sort of thing.
It’s a comedy though. Comedies mock culture norms and use them for laughs. Are you suggesting Friends should not use the views that already exist within society to be funny to its viewers who hold those exact views? It’s pretty hard to find it problematic that the two men on the show are embarrassed how hugging each other when the joke is on their insecurity. So, maybe “a lot of people on this website can’t see anything problematic” because Friends is not reinforcing anything problematic.
I’m not suggesting Friends should or should not do anything. I think this video would be interesting as an analysis of how these supposed cultural norms are reflected in our everyday entertainment and perpetuated by them. I disagree though that Friends is ‘mocking’ these norms. They’re playing into them. There’s not nearly enough self-awareness in the jokes they make to suggest that they’re trying to say ‘look at how silly Joey and Chandler are for feeling weird about hugging’.
What I would really love to see is a discussion of how shows like Modern Family portray gay characters and treat the issue of homosexuality today, because I don’t know if I can say a lot has really changed in the sitcom scenarios. MF particularly infuriates me because we haven’t seen an episode where Cam and Mitchell aren’t completely over-exaggerated and constantly bickering. Is this the progressive view of gay marriage in the US we’re supposed to be exposed to? They seem miserable and it’s supposed to be hilarious!
To be fair, isn’t that show Everybody Loves Raymond entirely based on Ray Romano and his wife bickering and insulting each other constantly? Hasn’t that been done 800 times with straight couples? You want the gay couple to be the one couple that is rainbows and butterflies and boring? Fair treatment means the gay couples should be just as dysfunctional as the straight ones for comedic affect. Treating them differently, specially, would undermine integrating gays into pop culture.
Oh my god YES. I constantly vacillate between loving and hating the portrayal of Cam and Mitchell in Modern Family. I mean, it’s not that I think they’re unrealistic, I just… it really really bothers me that there are so few scenes of real affection between them. Every other major couple in the show has gotten kisses and make out scenes. But not the gays. I can’t help but feel really strange about that.
Thank god a reason I can point to as to why I hate this show. It was just on in the laundromat, it took all of my power to not give their whiny voices all of my attention.
can we talk about will & grace now? that show had a lot of offensive, homophobic jokes, but still is one of my favorite shows and karen is one of the best characters of a tv show OF ALL TIME. there i say it
ummm… David Crane (creator/producer/writer of the show, along with Marta Kauffman) is actually openly GAY. Before anyone starts calling “Friends” an homophobic show… go read a little bit about how David Crane took a big part in introducing/increasing gay characters and story lines into primetime TV and how a lot of the stories were based in his own experiences with the subject. Also consider that the show was still a reflection of its own time and reality.
I watched the show since I was in middle school (it’s actually my favorite show of all times, watched every single season several times) and I can honestly say that it never EVER “encouraged” an “homophobic” feeling/thought in me, but the TOTAL OPPOSITE.
I don’t think this little “study” was “clever” at all. It lacks fundamentals.
I am so confused, really? REALLY!?! I have my criticisms of the show but homophobia is not one of them.
I’m a lesbian and I love Friends so much I took a tour of the WB Studios just to be able to sit on the Central Perk couch, which is in storage on a backlot. No one will ever convince me that it is an homophobic/offensive/whatever show. I agree wholeheartedly that some people go out of their way to be offended and must have very stressful lives.
I used to watch Friends religiously when I was a kid. I think I had a bit of a crush on Rachel. And I was like, 100% sure that Joey was gay. Didn’t he ever strike anyone else as gay, or was my little-kid brain interpreting things wrong? Actually, I think I may have turned all the characters gay in my mind at one point during my childhood, so…yeah.
Sometimes i think we are the homophobes – constantly looking for homophobic behaviour in anything. So much so, to the point that we miss the whole goddamn point! Friends is over an era where people were becoming more comfortable with the inclusion of gay/lesbian ideals in every day life. Ross’s wife left him for a woman – of course he’s going to be peeved and make some jokes, but you know what – Susan and Carol stay together for the entire series unlike every other programme on at the time that dared to contain lesbians. Not only that, they were funny, and hot and brought up a perfectly well balanced child. Millions of people watched that and let it sink in as a possibility. And Joe and Chandler may have made “no homo” jokes, but really, sometimes skinny people make “no fat” jokes and fat people make “no skinny” jokes and pop music lovers make “no rock” jokes and Rock lovers make “no pop” jokes and so on. Come on people, those dudes hugged and loved eachother in a way that trancended any gay straight trans labels. WE are the ones who are putting lables on everything. We’re shoving ourselves in these boxes we claim to hate. So Chandler had a tough time with his dad being trans – SO WHAT! It can be tough. Just because you feel something should be accepted with open arms, doesnt mean its an easy road for the people who are also involved in the situation. The message for that whole story is that Chandler worked through it and the outcome was his ‘dad’ and him had a restored healthy relationship. Good overcoming adversity. God, are we THAT blinded by our own narcissism?
I’m so over it, sometimes i’m embarressed to be part of the LGBT community when we endorse things like this. Why don’t we just ostracize ourselves even more and take 10 steps back in our intergration into normality. Great job.
Yeah no. I agree with most of the other comments, this is really reaching. At worst, Friends was heteronormative; mostly it was progressive, and really freakin’ funny. All this video did was make me wanna go watch some reruns.
I just watched it…those jokes weren’t offensive
HOW ABOUT WE GO AFTER REAL HOMOPHOBIA IN SOCIETY
INSTEAD OF
BASHING A COMEDY (emphasis on comedy) THAT WAS WAY AHEAD OF ITS TIME IN SHOWING GAY PEOPLE AS, UM, REAL PEOPLE WITH REAL PEOPLE LIVES INCLUDING MARRIAGES, BABIES, DOCTOR’S APPTS, SEX (Helen and Susan’s anniversary), AND OH…
WHAT ELSE…
LAUGHTER.
HAHAHAHA – LAUGHTHER: YOU SHOULD TRY IT; IT’S FUNNY.
oops, meant Susan and CAROL.
I used to read Autostraddle to feel happy and informed. But lately, the overly pc articles are just making me sad, angry, and embarrassed for this otherwise really awesome site. Dear Autostraddle, could you stop being offended by everything? Just keep up the articles about politics, books, poetry, and sex, and then you’ll bring a smile to my face like you always have, up until this past week.
I hope you realize (*maybe not or..whatever*) the author of this article may not be offended..? What I gathered was “oh there is a queer lady who made this video, what are your feelings?”
Some of us agree and some of us don’t, it’s a called a discussion.
Plus you really don’t have to read any of the articles you consider “overly pc”
Just saying. AS provides something for almost everyone :D
Ugh, Autostraddle. Your latest stuff has really been irking me with your uber sensitive attitude. I think I’ll just stay with Queerty for my daily entertainment.
I dunno but I felt as if this is too much of an over reach after reading it. Sure, I’m all for being watchful of how we’re portrayed in society but at the same time, we also have the tendencies to oversensitize things.
Ross was simply being Ross… Mind you, he always ends up getting dissed for his closed minded thinking and remarks, I think the creators and writers of the show (Gay as most of them are)were one of the first members of hollywood to start the trend of including GLBT characters and themes into mainstream media…
I AGREE WITH EVERYONE ABOVE ME WHO HAS THE SAME OPINION AS ME.
I love Friends and I think that the fact they were able to make “gay” jokes without being Homophobic played an important part in shaping the way the younger generation sees the world. By acknowledging the fact that being gay is a thing without making it an evil thing or falling back on negative stereotypes with the actual gay characters. In fact they ridiculed these stereotypes via the ignorance of the main characters. Those characters we were meant to relate to or aspire to be.
There is a difference between being Homophobic, or indeed Racist, and making jokes. None of the Gay or African American characters we were introduced to fell into the typical traps that so many TV shows or Films do that I can recall.
To be honest I think I would probably be much more offended if someone made a montage of all the scenes containing fat jokes/Monica in a fat suit. Fat people are the only people everyone is allowed to make fun of apparently.
Just saying.
Two non stereotyped gay women hold each other lovingly on TV at their wedding – in the 90’s…
The three female friends look at a Playboy and discuss which woman they would rather date. And there is gay tension as much as straight between the group. The show is TOO white and the later episodes are terrible but it will always be a favorite because it was progressive and had strong female gay characters. This montage must be taking tidbits out of context. Friends is a winner.