Six Places to Shop for Super Cute Gender-Neutral Kids Clothing
There’s a wonderful thing happening in the realm of children’s clothing that is LONG overdue: the realization that toxic gender norms and stereotypes have no place in children’s closets has become more mainstream than ever before. The resulting increase in demand for gender neutral kid’s clothing has allowed small businesses that were already filling this gap to gain traction. It’s also leading major retailers to provide more gender neutral options, making them more accessible both physically and financially to those seeking them. This is a major win for the queer community. We’ve always been at the forefront calling for the creation and inclusion of gender neutral clothing and spaces across age groups, and it seems those calls are finally being answered on a macro level.
I spend a LOT of time shopping for kid’s clothes as I’m solidly in that “all my friends are getting married and starting families” phase. I know all too well how disheartening it is to try to shop for tiny humans and succeed at sorting through all the pink princess dresses and blue truck t-shirts and come out with something that doesn’t say “I bought this to pigeonhole your gender expression into one that fits society’s backwards expectations based on the belief that sex and gender are related.” Given my experiences, I figured it’d be helpful to share a list of stores i’ve come across in my baby shower and birthday gift shopping that are amazing resources for dressing a gender neutral child. Bonus info: aside from the three major retailers (Amazon, Polarn O Pyreet, and Target) all these shops are woman-created and owned. Polarn O Pyreet’s US division CEO is a woman as well.
Amazon.com
Unsurprisingly, given that Amazon has everything ever and will deliver it straight to your doorstep so there’s no real reason to leave home ever again, they also have thousands of gender-neutral clothing items and accessories on their site. They source from lots of smaller sellers so the diversity of styles is pretty amazing and there’s something for just about every personality of child and family. They’ve also got a great selection of gender-neutral room decor and toys, making it the ultimate one-stop shop. The only place Amazon falls a little short is that they have far more options for infants and toddlers than older children.
Gardner and the Gang
This line was started in 2012 by artist Kristen Nystrom and inspired by the birth of her child. She draws all the prints and gives each collection a fun story and cast of characters. Their clothes are organic and comfy but also super trendy and fashionable, so if you’re looking for that LA hipster kid aesthetic, this is the place to go.
The Bunting Tree
The Bunting Tree is a UK-based shop started and run by a mom named Emma. Their items are also organic and ethically made in a small family owned factory in India. All designs are handmade and feature bright bold colors and prints. They use lots of rainbows in their designs, so their clothes are often favorites of queer families!
Polarn O Pyreet
This shop has a pretty badass history. The creators started off opening a drugstore over 100 years ago in Sweden that also sold some clothing and condoms, as they wanted to help Swedes with family planning. They later shifted to selling just clothing and are now one of the most popular retailers for gender-neutral children’s clothing. Their brand values specifically state “we avoid gender stereotypes by using unisex colours and prints.” Navy and red and all things striped are their trademarks and their clothes are a favorite among celebrities. They expanded sales online and in store to the US about three years ago, and are widely available in Europe and the UK!
Target
Between removing “girls” and “boys” labels from their toy section, committing to providing gender neutral restrooms, and now announcing a clothing line in collaboration with Toca Boca that will include genderless options, Target is really trying to win our hearts. They’ve gotten a ton of buzz over the impending release of their line, but even now a quick search on their website for “unisex baby clothes” returns over 800 solid results.
Wynken Kids
Wynken is a unisex kid’s brand created by mother and clothing designer Elbe Lealman and based in London. Their collections are contemporary and modern, yet playful. Comfort and mobility are central to the cuts of their items, so these make great play and activity clothes for energetic little bodies.
11 Fanny Packs for Almost Every Fandom
Since becoming a dog parent, I’ve become sold on fanny packs in a way I’ve never been sold before. I have to carry a bunch of stuff, and even in my men’s clothes, the pockets aren’t enough. I don’t want to lug a tote or a backpack through the park on a hot day. Enter the fanny pack: perfect accessory for people who have too much shit to carry and not enough fucks to give. That’s me. I suspect it might also be you. I ordered this one specifically to walk my dog with and then I fell in love. I understand my mother so much better now.
The number one thing I’ve come to understand about fanny pack culture is this: it is never going to look good. Not even when Etsy calls it a “festival bag.” So it may as well make you happy. If ever there was a time to go ridiculous and let your nerd side show, it is in the selection of your fanny pack. So without further ado, I give you a selection of fanny packs I have found based on Tumblr fandoms. This was more difficult than you may think, so there is just one bag per fandom. You should also totally add to this list in the comments.
Doctor Who
Studyblr
Studying has a fandom, believe it or not. I went with an ~aesthetic~ bag. Minimalist Gin fanny pack, $25, comes in a bunch o’ colors just fyi.
Marvel
The Science Side of Tumblr
Science also has a fandom and you can ask it questions! Constellation Bum Bag, $25.
Adventure Time
Bookblr
Yup. Books have a fandom, too. Alice In Wonderland Fanny Pack, $30.
Harry Potter
I feel like Slytherin doesn’t get nearly enough love, so here you go, my Slytherin friends. Slytherin Bum Bag, $12.22.
DC Comics
Of course I went Wonder Woman, did you think I was not going to go Wonder Woman? Wonder Woman Fanny Pack, $24.
Star Wars
Steven Universe
Get it? Get it? The gem in this bag is an AMETHYST! This one’s pricey, it’s a “pocket belt,” $148.37.
Minecraft
In conclusion, I had a My Little Pony fanny pack in here too, but I was really scandalized by the hashtag so it doesn’t get its own heading. Here you go, though!
6 Products to Prevent Chub Rub This Summer
feature image via shutterstock
Everyone knows that summer is the best season, like, by far. You get to wear your cutest outfits, you get to go swimming, the sun is out and the fun is out. I especially love summer because I get to wear my shortest skirts and dresses and not worry about being cold. I also get to wear Gold Bond Friction Defense. I mean, really, I get to wear it year round, but it’s especially relevant in the summer. If your thighs touch, then you know about the pain that is chub rub or thigh chafing. It’s seriously a nightmare; who knew that just being a living human being with thighs that touch could cause you so much pain? But there’s good news! Your summer doesn’t have to be ruined if you use these terrific, chafing-preventing products!
This post is not sponsored by Gold Bond Friction Defense, I just really love it.
Gold Bond Friction Defense
This is what I use literally every day of my life. I’m very fat, and last year I decided I wanted to get rid of all my pants and all my leggings, so every day I wear a skirt or dress, and every day I use Gold Bond Friction Defense, and every day it works like a wonder. I haven’t had a single minute of chafing or discomfort since I started using this. It’s basically a stick of deodorant designed to wear on your inner thighs. It’s simple, it’s easy, and it works like a charm.
Bandelettes
I have a pair of these and they’re really cute! They look like lingerie, so if you want to add a cute or sexy look to your outfit while also preventing chub rub, this is what I’d suggest. They don’t always stay up for me if I’m walking around all day, but it could just be me and my giant thighs. But I’d definitely recommend these if you want to make your outfit look extra cute while preventing chub rub.
Bike Shorts
These are a classic solution. They’re underwear, but the legs go down your thighs a few inches so that they cover up the exact part of your thighs that would normally be rubbing together. Supergirl wore these for a while as a part of her costume so that she could fly and not have people look up her skirt. If they’re good enough for Supergirl, they’re good enough for your thighs.
Reniece took this amazing picture of me at the beach showing off how great Gold Bond Friction Defense is.
Gold Bond Friction Defense
I use this product every day of my life. It’s no joke, no exaggeration, my favorite product that I use or buy. I can’t recommend it enough or enough times. It withstands sweat, water, a full day of walking, 100 degree weather, anything. It’s a miracle product and I don’t know how it was made without the use of magic.
Lush’s Silky Underwear Dusting Powder
Out of every chub rub solution I’ve heard, this one gets the most praise. Like, Lush is a high quality brand, everyone loves their bath bombs and soaps and body washes, and everyone also swears by their Silky Underwear Dusting Powder. If I were to try something other than Gold Bond Friction Defense, this would be my first choice.
Monistat Soothing Care Chafing Relief Powder-Gel
I don’t know anyone personally who uses this, but Monistat is usually well regarded by women, right? I’m also very unsure what a powder gel is, but the box says it “combines the protective benefits of lotion and powder” so that sounds pretty good.
Bodyglide
Now, I have heard a lot of good stuff about Bodyglide, and it’s packaging calls it the “original” anti chafing balm, so I think this stuff works. If you’ve heard lots of good things from your friends and are looking for a sure shot, this is what I’d go for. Unless you can choose Gold Bond Friction Defense.
I took this picture right after applying Gold Bond Friction Defense, went out cumbia dancing for hours and didn’t have a single problem.
Gold Bond Friction Defense
I’m in love with Gold Bond Friction Defense. If I could get a sponsorship from one company, one product, I’d want it to be this. Like, I’ll star in commercials for them in exchange for a lifetime supply, they don’t need to actually pay me. Actually, if we’re being real, I’d pay them to let me be in their commercials. Seriously, My thighs have about seven square miles of skin that are constantly touching and rubbing each other. I don’t wear pants, shorts or leggings and it’s extremely rare that I wear tights. Gold Bond Friction Defense is what I use. If you ever listen to one piece of advice from me, let it be to wear Gold Bond Friction Defense.
Some Quite Perfect Swimsuits for Trans Women
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For a lot of trans women, going to the pool or the beach can be one of the most stressful things about post-coming-out life. You’re more exposed than usual, swimsuits aren’t normally designed for girls with bodies like ours, and there are usually lots of people there. But don’t worry! Things aren’t hopeless for you! Here are just a few suggestions for trans women.
Summer is in full swing and it’s hotter than ever and so are you, and in classic trans girl style if you’re a late bloomer who didn’t buy a swimsuit in May, now’s your chance. If you’re looking for something a little more traditionally masc or butch, you can stick with board shorts; that’s just as valid an option for trans women as any of these one and two piece suits. Or you know what? Board Shorts can be femme too! Make fashion bend to your will, don’t give in to it’s demands.
Here are a bunch of super stylish and cute swimsuits that I think would look great on a trans woman.
Two Piece Suits
Two piece suits are super cute, and when you’re a trans woman, you might want a little bit of a skirt or short at the bottom, because let’s be honest, the biggest worry for a lot of trans women when going to the beach is making sure your bulge doesn’t show. I love this Underwire Bikini Top and matching Ruched High Waist Skirt Swim Bottom, the red looks especially great on trans girls. Another cute red option is the matching Polka Dot Print Halter Bikini Top and Polka Dot Print Tie Side Ruffle Swim Skirt, which have a nice retro feel and are a super stylish option for trans girls looking to get that modern femme aesthetic. If you have a top already, I’d suggest the Fringe High Waist Swim Bottom, which is fun and gives you a great ’60s look. Another ’60s throwback suit that has some nice light summer colors is this Pineapple Stripe Beach Crop Top Short Co-Ord, which is great if you want some extra space but not a skirt.
Black Swim Suits
If you don’t want to have a skirt on your suit but you’re still worried, the best way to disguise any bulges is with the color black. A dark suit always looks super stylish and is good at hiding anything you want to hide. This simple Lace Up Front One Piece is sleek and great for plus size Tall Girls. A slightly more bold option would be this Color Block One Piece or Tiger Embroidered Swimsuit, which both have large black areas in the crotch. I love the pattern on the Fruity Suity One Piece, which is both busy and dark, so it’s extra good at hiding. Finally, if you want to go with a two piece, this Boohoo Mix and Match Bikini in Black is simple, flirty and fun. If you’re looking for a cover up, this Gauze Lace Inset Swim Cover Up will make you look like a witch out for a beach day, which if you’re a trans woman, that’s exactly what you are.
One Piece Suits
Again, if you’re looking to get a little coverage, these one piece suits are perfect for you. First we’ve got this cute and bright Ruffle Skirt One Piece Swim Dress, which is great for any softies. If you’re a little tougher, I love this Skull Dot Print Peplum One Piece, which is perfect for the thousands of goth trans girls out there across the country. Finally, if you’re a party animal, want to show off your gay pride or you just want everyone to stare at you, I don’t think you have a better option than the Jaded London Rainbow Sequin Fringe Swimsuit.
Sporty Suits
If you’re more the sporty type of trans woman, there are lots of cool and tuff options for you too! This Ripcurl Stripe Swimsuit is super stylish and not too femme. The Active Cap Sleeve Swimsuit is simple, but makes a nice statement. I love the way this Free Society Marl Textured Bikini looks like a sports bra. Or if you want to look like an ’80s beach babe with a little extra coverage, this The Crop and High Waist bikini in ’80s Print is perfect for that. Or if you want to go for the full coverage look, this O’Neill Mesh Insert Body Swimsuit looks amazing and is a nice dark color.
Board Shorts
You know, being a trans girl doesn’t mean you have to give up wearing shorts! If that’s what you’re into, go for it! You do you! Outplay has a bunch of awesome options. For some shorter short I like the Todasana and Tomboier options. Or if you want a looser fit the Choroni and Atlantic Board Shorts look great. I’ll see you at the beach! Or the pool I guess!
Rash Guards
I recently saw the movie 47 Meters Down and Mandy Moore and Claire Holt looked super cute in rash guards before they were surrounded by sharks, so I’m sure trans women would look even cuter. This RVCA Neoprene Rash Tank is especially cute, and works for a lot of different styles and aesthetics. If you want to go the simple, straightforward route, the Caurimare from Outplay is a classic black, long-sleeved option. I also absolutely love the Mochima, a rash gaurd that uses the Outplay logo but also definitely looks more than a little bit like that ’90s paper cup design.
Relevant To Your Interests: And Now, Wonder Woman Everything
FYI, Autostraddle may collect a small share of sales from some of the links on this page.
Usually, I can’t get into superheroes. I just have never been into the “good” guys enforcing weirdly strict morals while leaving a river of destruction in their wake. There have only been two exceptions to this rule, movie-wise. One happened in 2008 and I only love it because Heath Ledger is an acting genius and I actually think The Joker is the protagonist in that movie anyhow (here is a good argument for it FIGHT ME). The other happened this month. And that is Wonder Woman. Of course.
Other than this being a movie about a lady superhero directed by a woman with a feminist screenplay (though I certainly hear your concerns about Gal Gadot’s personal politics), the gaze of horror was never averted during this superhero movie. And I think that’s why I can get behind it in a way I rarely can with the superhero genre. We were never asked to desensitize to the violence; we were allowed to be horrified by it the entire time. Encouraged, in fact. And that’s how I think violence should be, ya know? Even in the epic fight scenes. Plus I got to see a woman punch war. Just, like, all of it. All of war. Punched. That’s pretty fucking rad. Not even my persistent concern that some angry straight cis dude would shoot up my theatre could wreck it. I wish I’d gotten to go to a woman-only screening for that reason. Then it would have been total bliss.
For a more in-depth discussion of the movie, you should read Heather Hogan. For a totally fluffy Wonder Woman shopping guide, look no further.
Books, Books, Books!
Sensation Comics Featuring Wonder Woman, vol 1. (Gail Simone and Ethan Van Sciver), $9.61. Wonder Woman: The Lies (Rebirth), vol. 1 (Greg Rucka and Liam Sharp—side note, I wasn’t going to put anything in here that didn’t involve at least one woman, but Greg Rucka’s the author who said WW was queer, so), $11.68. The Secret History of Wonder Woman (Jill Lepore), $9.95. Wonder Woman Coloring Book, $10.35.
Boldly Announce Your Wonder Woman Devotion…
Wonder Woman Teeshirt/Tank, starts at $17.99. Daughter of Themyscira tank, starts at $23. Wonder Woman Resist mug, starts at $12.99. Wonder Woman Brooch, $11.76.
…Or Do So With a Bit More Subtlety
Wonder Woman Tiara Ring, starts at $55. Wonder Woman logo necklace, $9.50. Wonder Woman enamel pin, $10. Wonder Woman logo pin, $5.99.
Relevant To Your Interests: The Nerdiest Birthday Cards I Could Find
Friends, I don’t usually celebrate my birthday, but this year I got it into my head to do so. What am I doing, you ask? One of my friends is DMing a Dungeons and Dragons one-shot game in which I get to be a player. My wife refused to play in this game, or any Dungeons and Dragons game — she’s going to knit and drink and heckle us. Oh, my wife is also a May-birthday-person, though she is a Taurus and I am a Gemini. She took a final on her birthday this year, as she has every year since she started law school. Also somehow, some way, most people in my life are either born in May or December, so this is one of the months where birthdays are really on my mind. Without further ado, here are the nerdiest birthday cards I could find on the internet.
Gamer Happy Birthday Card, $3.34. 8008135 calculator card, $4.68. Such Birthday Card, $4.50. Candle Wax card, $6.00. Because that last one might need a little explanation: “This aqua green card shows the hand-drawn chemical structure of the wax in birthday candles. The blank interior leaves plenty of space for you to personalize your nerdiest birthday wishes.”
Pixel Art Birthday Cake, $3.34. Yoda Best, $4.68. Awkward Presidents, $4.01. Nerdburger card, $4.61 and perfect for fans of Juliet Takes a Breath by Gabby Rivera.
Novel birthday, $4.50. Happy Birthday You Big Nerd, $3.46. Wonder Woman Card, $5.00. You’re a Wizard birthday card, $3.75.
9 Autostraddle-Approved Travel Accessories for Your Next Vacation
Travel season is upon us. Below you’ll find some of our staff’s must-have travel accessories.
The Phone Case That Doubles as a Wallet
My number one “carrying stuff and/or traveling” favorite thing is this iPhone case with room for two cards. It doesn’t look like a wallet case, but it keeps my ID and debit card from falling out, and it doesn’t get in the way of phone use like cases that have flaps or more of a wallet feel can. It’s also flexible enough to secret away an emergency bill between the case and the body of the phone, and is sturdy enough that even though I drop my phone all the time, both my phone and the case have survived. I like having to remember as few things as possible, and carrying a full wallet hasn’t been part of my lifestyle for a while because who has that many hands/pockets anyway, but this case lets me just go about my life without ever turning up somewhere without my ID or card. — Carolyn, Literary and NSFW Editor
The Passport Cover That’ll Keep You Charged Up
As someone who generally doesn’t carry a purse, this nifty accessory is my holy grail. It stores anything and everything I’ll need to dig out of my carry-on bag (like my phone, passport, charger, credit card, etc.), and has room to stuff other things into it, like boarding passes or train tickets. It’s so handy, and even comes in a variety of colors! #thewanderlustisreal – Priya, Staff Writer
The One-Two Punch for All Your Toiletries
1. Alink 16-Piece Travel Bottle Set, $12 2. Louise Maelys Cosmetics Bag (set of two), $16
I’ve gotten slightly better over time at packing light clothing-wise, but still struggle to narrow down various goops and serums. Will my bangs get weird if I don’t bring color-safe conditioner? What if I don’t have six lip color options? I should bring extra makeup remover, because I am definitely going to fuck up my eyeliner. This toiletry bag/bottles combo has replaced my previous tradition of attempting to stuff a Ziplock way too full of specially bought travel-size products that I don’t even like; I even give my bottles little taped-on labels now! I may be vain as ever, but when it comes to organization, I’m a whole new woman. – Nora, Fashion and Beauty Editor
The Tomboy Classic Knapsack
Sounds cheesy, but I love my Herschel Bag as a carry-on for flying. It’s slim and light, low-profile and has a pocket for my laptop. No frills, no mess, no back-breaking load. – Ali, Geekery Editor
The Sturdy (and Surprising) Weekender Bag
I just love the ruggedly classy aesthetic of the canvas and leather. It’s got zippered compartments galore, expands to fit some shoes, and after a few years of use it still looks pretty new and the shoulder strap/handles haven’t really worn down at all. – Faith, Staff Writer
The Two-in-One Backpack/Day Bag
This bag was more like my home during my month-and-a-half-long trip to Bangladesh and India last year, so forgive my verbose response, but I am absolutely in love with it. If you’re traveling light and want a piece of luggage that is well-designed, comfortable, and easy to use, this is your backpack. I hate digging through a bag, so I love that it’s zippered compartments mimic those of a suitcase, zipping entirely open so you have full access to all your stuff. It also features all the great things a good backpack should have (compression and adjustment straps, breathable mesh so your back doesn’t swamp out, and a padded harness). The best feature is the detachable day pack, which is essentially a smaller backpack that zips onto the front of the larger compartment. It looks like a miniature version of the big pack, so it’s got the breathable mesh and even a tiny adjustable waist strap! I use it as my day-to-day bag when I’m not traveling. In our first moments in the airport together as bag and girl, something magical happened – the bag was deemed too heavy to carry on, so I just zipped off the day pack and checked the remaining bag. This bag will not let you down! – Sarah, Marketing Director
The Backpack That Lasts, Like, Forever
Kelty Coyote Backpack, $220
I love this bag. I’ve used it for backpacking, but it also makes a great suitcase when I’m traveling without a single destination — whether that’s an international trip with multiple cities on the schedule or a long weekend trip where I’ll be hopping between a few friends’ houses. It has many many pockets, and because it’s built for backpacking, it’s extremely durable. It’s a bit pricey, but I’ve used mine consistently for seven years with no rips, and all the zippers still work too. Bonus: if you strap it down tight, it’ll fit in the overhead bin. — Audrey, Staff Writer
The Laptop-Friendly Carry-On Roller
Incase Eo Travel Roller, $299
This is my current favorite bag. It fits in most overhead compartments, is very cute, and zips open to be a little bigger if needed. It also has a dedicated spot for a laptop, which I need, and I love the yellow wheels. – Cee, Tech Director
Wildfang’s Latest Line has Your Dapper and Tomboy Needs Covered
Photo courtesy Wildfang
Wildfang just dropped their summer collection, and if you’re in need of swanky suiting or statement tees, you’re in luck. Are you excited as I am? It doesn’t matter, because I’m going to rave about it anyway!
First up from the Lucca x Wildfang collaboration is this amazing palm print for when you want to make clear that even though you’re dressed to the nines, you’re still feeling very relaxed about the whole thing. The Kaling Blazer is perfect if you like your jacket hem to hit a little lower on the leg, or you could go full-on hot professor with the shorter, elbow-patched Jacobson.
1. Ahmed Pant 2. Morris Jogger
As for pants, the Ahmed will give you that classic cigarette look; meanwhile, the Morris will transport you back to the days of crushing on that enigmatic skater cutie in your sophomore year science class. Plot twist: you’re the enigmatic skater cutie now!
Similarly, the long Gevinson Blazer and the patched-up Rodriguez are both devastatingly handsome options.
1. Isaac Pant 2. Quinto Trouser
As are the skinny Isaac Pants, and the cropped Quinto Trouser.
But maybe you’re not a print person. No problem, because the bright white Teigen Blazer and its longer sibling the Newton will have you looking like a straight-up angel. I mean, did it hurt when you fell from the heavens, or what?
1. Elba Pant 2. Cho Trouser
The slim Elba Pant is dapper perfection, while the wider-cut Cho is designed to show a little more leg.
Of course you’re going to need some shirts for your suits, like the embroidered Essence Symbols and lush Knowles Button-Ups.
1. Stewart Bomber 2. Lamar Jogger 3. Aboah Coveralls
Not much for suiting? The Stewart Bomber, Lamar Jogger, and Aboah Coveralls will have you screaming, “Chambray all day!” Or will at least have me screaming when I see you strutting around looking like a sexy mechanic. Damn, girl, looks like you could use some help cleaning off all that elbow grease.
And the Stewart isn’t where the bombers end — there are also the super simple Wild Feminist, leaf-laden Robinson, and gorgeously detailed Essence jackets.
1. Wild Feminist Tee 2. Essence Tee 3. Symbols Tee
Even more casual, you say? This season’s crop of Wild Feminist tees come in several black and white color combos, with 10% of proceeds going to Planned Parenthood and the ACLU.
And don’t sweat the weird summer hair days ahead, because you’re covered there, too.
And finally, for those cooler nights when you feel like getting cuddly, try a Wild Feminist Crew or two. Also, maybe cuddle up to a fellow wild feminist.
You can see the whole Wildfang Summer 2017 collection here.
Relevant To Your Interests: All Hail Lumpy Space Princess
Sometimes I am sad. And then I remember that Lumpy Space Princess is a character that exists on a television show that is currently still releasing episodes and I get happy again. That’s it, that’s the whole reason I am subjecting you to this Relevant To Your Interests. Happy Spring, Happy LSP.
Lumpy Space Morning
My…Beans! mug by Jen Lee, $20.85. LSP bath mat, $45.00. LSP hand towel, $13.00. LSP’s Campsite Soy Candle, $8.50.
Lumpy Space Art
LSP hand sewn felt pin, $18.00. LSP print by Gillian Newland, $9.34. I Lumping Love You digital download card, $2.50. LSP cross stitch pattern, $5.11.
Lumpy Space Lyfe
Card Wars Princess Bubblegum v. LSP, $16.39. LSP Black Vinyl Decal, $8.99. Oh My Glob enamel pin, $7.86. LSP Doc Martens because I really can’t get any gayer, $75-150 depending on the size.
Relevant To Your Interests: Cook Nerdy With Me
I’ve been thinking about the kitchen a lot lately. My wife says I have to learn how to cook. I can bake just fine, but whatever skill it is where people taste food they are cooking and go, hmm, this could use more [insert ingredient here]? I don’t have that. I have the cold hard science of baking. It is this conversation that has inspired me to find the nerdiest kitchen implements I can possibly Google up, cooking or baking. So here we are, in no order and with no organization (because seriously, I could’ve done just Star Wars, that’s how much nerdy kitchen stuff the internet holds), here is the very geekiest cookware out there.
That Kitchen Stuff I Mentioned
Death Star Waffle Maker, $39.99. Pikachu Cake Pan, $19.99. Dino Cookie Cutters, $14.99. Star Trek Oven Mitt, $14.99.
Printable Sciencey Spice Labels, $5. Come to the Dark Side Kitchenaid Decal, $5. Cookie Cat Cookie Cutter, $5+ (depends on size). Cook You Must cutting board, $20.
And Cookbooks Because Maybe We’re Not In The Darkest Timeline
Pokémon Cookbook, $14.99. World of Warcraft: The Official Cook Book, $34.99. Adventure Time: The Official Cookbook, $18.06. Treat Yourself, $8.86 (full disclosure, my friend wrote this book. And it is full of ways to make emoji rice krispy treats, so).
Relevant To Your Interests: The Nerdiest Coloring Books in All the Land
Last month we painted minis because quietly making stuff is one antidote to this white nationalist administration for me! So here’s another way to sit calmly with your own thoughts and not panic scroll through the New York Times and Facebook. Once a week, try sitting down, lighting a candle and turning all screens off while you color. But even if the screens are off, it doesn’t mean our nerd is. Below: the nerdiest coloring books I could find.
Books
Wuthering Heights Coloring Book, $6.99. Edgar Allan Poe Coloring Book, $9.29. Hamilton Coloring Book (okay, the reason you want it is probably not the biography, but there weren’t enough for a musicals category), $7.87. Alice’s Nightmare in Wonderland, $14.95.
TV Shows and Movies
Doctor Who Coloring Book, $8.99. Sherlock Coloring Book, $10.47. Game of Thrones Coloring Book, $7.97. Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, $11.21. Supernatural Coloring Book, $11.21. Coloring Dragons (art from Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit movies), $8.78. Star Trek Coloring Book, $9.90. Rogue One Coloring Book, $15.99.
Science
Human Anatomy Coloring Book (preorder, $14.99). Physiology Coloring Book, $13.43. The Sibley Birds Coloring Field Journal, $13.75.
Holigay Gift Guide For Europeans: Because International Shipping Sucks
Illustration by Sophie Argetsinger
As someone based outside the US, my holiday shopping generally goes something like this:
- Spend three hours Googling variations of the words ‘queer’, ‘feminist’ and ‘gifts’
- Finally find something absolutely perfect!
- Add it to my basket
- Realise the store doesn’t ship to my country, or international shipping costs three times the price of the thing itself
- Return to Step 1
Lucky for us European queermos, there’s been an explosion in independent, radical retailers based in this fair continent of ours over the last few years. It won’t stop you lusting over that badge set that wants $25 for postage, but all the stores featured here provide reasonably priced shipping across Europe, as well as great gifts for all your pals that live there.
Patches!
via etsy.com
For a long time, it felt like the US had some kind of copyright on good patches. Getting my beloved Stay Home Club patch onto my rucksack involved finding enough pals to make up a $200 order and get free international shipping. Do you know how many patches you have to buy to make up $200? It’s a lot. Luckily, the world’s moved on, and now you can cover every piece of fabric you own in patches without having to split postage between your closest 30 friends. That means you can all skip the hassle and go straight to celebrating Legitimate Feminist Icon, Lisa Simpson, instead.
Kitchenware!
It’s a truth universally acknowledged, that queers love kitchenware. So why not make all your friends’ kitchenware queer? You can get this LGBT teatowel from The Radical Tea Towel Company, a family business that specialises in socialist, feminist and radical kitchen accessories. Their Facebook adverts make up about 40% of my News Feed, and that’s just the way I like it.
Pins!
via punkypins.co.uk
You know everything I said a minute ago about patches? Double that for pins. It’s obviously a terrible idea to spend $20 shipping, plus custom charges, on a $7 pin. So why did I spend so long doing it? You can get great enamel pins in Europe now! I mean, look at this one right here – it’s Rosie the Riveter, but she’s a cat. I love it! Your friends would love it! Unless they don’t like cats. In which case, maybe they like pizza? Or intimidating people who are scared by nipples? There’s something for everyone.
Zines!
Via etsy.com
Even if you’re buying locally, postage can still start racking up if you’re sending gifts around the world. Zines make great presents for faraway friends by excelling in three virtues: they’re cheap to buy, cheap to ship, and usually made by great independent creatives. For extra points, find a local distro, buy a stack, and post them yourself. Otherwise, Etsy is the best place to look for zines on everything from radical vulnerability to Bruce Springsteen’s butt.
Jewellery!
I’m gonna take a minute to talk about my favourite jewellery shop in the world, Hannah Zakari. I used to live about ten minutes walk away from the physical Hannah Zakari store. On our first anniversary, my girlfriend and I were both broke undergrads, so we decided that she would buy me a reasonably priced gift and I would pay for dinner. Unfortunately, I then walked into Hannah Zakari and saw a ring so perfect for her, I ended up buying it and blowing past even her present budget. Luckily, I now live many hours away from the shop; unluckily, it has a great range of jewellery, accessories and other neat stuff available online.
Journals!
Because what’s more queer than recording your feelings? Europe is blessed with a great amount of gorgeous stationary, like this Ideas Book. The variety of paper types means you won’t be confined to just writing, which is fantastic, because sometimes words aren’t enough to express your thoughts; send this gorgeous journal to a friend, and it can hold their rage scribbles after you make out with their best friend at their birthday party in a few months time.
Stickers!
Via etsy.com
Stickers are great for similar reasons that zines are – they’re about as flat as you can get. For some reason, Germany really seems to have cornered the market on rad sticker sets. Check out these feminist cats! Or this piece of body positive awesome! Or there’s Rory Midhani’s dance party sticker set. Midhani’s artwork is super fun, super diverse, and you might have seen it on this very site.
Tarot!
Autostraddle’s own Beth Maiden deals with importing from the U.S. so you don’t have to. She stocks a whole bunch of tarot decks – for many, she’s the only European stockist – suitable for friends who’ve been doing tarot for years and those who maybe mentioned they kind of wanted to get into it once. The Fountain is one of my favourites; it’s a beautiful, beginner-friendly deck, made up of 79 hand-painted cards and a small booklet introducing you to the deck and how to read tarot.
Totes!
Via etsy.com
Who doesn’t love a tote bag? I appreciate any opportunity to broadcast my queer, cat-loving and/or feminist agenda, and a tote bag lets you do that while also carrying your groceries. Here in the UK, they’re even more useful, because shops have to charge you for a plastic bag. Everyone complained about it at first, but it’s led to an 85% reduction in plastic bag use in England alone and tons of designers making real cute totes. Send your friend a tote bag and you can celebrate their body hair, or the power of mothers, or the joy of being gal pals and help them carry stuff without you having to actually carry anything. It’s a win-win!
Fancy Jewellery!
Everyone’s loving gemstones these days. I have no idea why. If you need to really impress someone on your Christmas gift list, asterlingidea uses recycled and ethically sourced materials to handcraft beautiful raw and organic jewellery. If you go for one of their , you even get to choose your own gemstone from a list that includes pretty much every Crystal Gem. No pearl, though. Sorry, Pearl.
17 Incredible Indie Online Shops for One-of-a-Kind Gifts to One-of-a-Kind People
I. Love. Shopping.
I used to be strictly a major retail store gal until a few years ago when my dad moved to Austin. There, indies reign. As a result, I got really into supporting small businesses. But now living in NYC, while small businesses certainly do exist, I work in Soho so it’s pretty easy (if I ignore that I live on a publishing salary) to walk into my “local” chain, get what I “need” and get out. Fortunately, thanks to my job I’ve also attended some really cool conventions where I’ve met some greet queer shopowners of color. Many of these artists and creators also happen to be WOC and/or young people. As a result, I wanted to share some of my favorite online shops that will hopefully appeal to the queers in your life… just in time for the holigays (but are also available year-round)!
Happy (online) shopping <3
The One-Stop Shopper
Via Provoke Culture
Provoke Culture sells artwork for a collective of artists that celebrate culture and identity through their work. I first discovered Provoke Culture at their Flame Con booth earlier this summer and have been in love ever since. All artists receive 75% of all sales and 25% of all profits is donated to organizations that help women and youth dealing with homelessness, violence or are living under difficult circumstances.
The Skincare Queen
Via BeeLux Goods
When I was younger, I had the worst case of eczema that only got better after years of using “thick lotion” aka Eucerin “Original” cream. It did the job, but it wasn’t the fun, cutely-packaged, smell-good lotion I craved. I discovered BeeLux Goods last year and their “Bumble Butter” is great for dry skin without feeling like you have on thick layer of, well, thick lotion. They have a wide variety of (colorful!) products in affordable prices. Add in the fact that I share a name with its founder, Ashley Patrice, and BeeLux Goods is hands down my favorite all-natural beauty company.
The Hand-Lettering Obsessed
Via Mi Chiquita
Via Jade & Serif
I’m obsessed with hand-lettering. Blame my day job in which I spend hours analyzing “fun fonts” and cover typography as well as the fact that I never mastered cursive myself. For those who love a framed inspirational quote or art print with a pretty-script caption, look no further than these southern WOC-run shops. Mi Chiquita is run by Theresa Michelle Flores, a North Carolina-based Latinx artist, and Jade & Serif is run by Jade Pilgrom, an Alabama-based Black graphic designer and illustrator.
The Fandom Fanatic
Via Little Corvus
Via FanMail
It’s impossible for me to name my favorite fandom. I grew up on a steady diet of Star Wars and Star Trek. My Netflix queue is filled with The CW and Canadian SFF shows. And, I’m a total YA book nerd. These two shops — Little Corvus, the brand of queer latina comic artist & illustrator Sara DuVall, whose items have been fueling my Finn & Poe love, and FanMail, an amazing bimonthly subscription box for “lady geeks” founded by Rose Del Vecchio and Jenny Cheng, two twentysomething women who I met earlier this year at Flame Con.
Who Rule the World? (Colored) Girls
Via Dorcas Creates
I only recently discovered these two shops and I’ve already bought merchandise. Colored Girls Hustle (top) is a dynamic organization (re)defining hustle as passion-filled and purpose-driven work. Its founder, Taja Lindley is an unapologetically proud Black queer femme feminist woman. Dorcascreates’ owner, Dorcas Magbadelo is a UK-based visual artist passionate about creating work that people can identify with and, in particular, celebrating strength and beauty in black women.
The Fashionably Minded
Via Rebirth Garments
Via Luna Sangre
Via Burkinabae
I love all four of these brands. Ambiance Couture Bowties is my go-to bowtie shop. Its founder Silki Harris is a twentysomething lesbian event promoter and fashion designer. Rebirth Garments are designed by Sky Cubacub, a gender queer person of color. They make gender non-conforming wearables and accessories (in vibrant colors!) for people on the full spectrum of gender, size and ability. Luna Sangre is run by Latinx artist & designer Aubrey. All items are hand-sewn with inspiration drawn from Aubrey’s ancestors, neighborhood, and southern California barrio clothing of the 1940s/50s. And then there’s Burkinabae, a shop founded by Karen Chatelain that sells gorgeously intricate jewelry and accessories.
The Badass Witch
Via Hannah Daisy
Whether you’re a witch or just have an inner one, Magic Hour and Hannah Daisy are two favorites for witchy (& non-witch related) goodness. I’m particularly fond of Hannah Daisy’s nail decals!
The Indie Comics Lover
Via Wendy Xu
Via Mildred Louis
Last but never least, independent comics artists: Wendy Xu, Mildred Louis, & Queer Indigenous Girl. Wendy is a dear friend of mine, the co-creator of Mooncakes (which, though I’m biased, is so freaking amazing), a fierce diversity advocate, and pretty much my go-to source for indie artist info such as the best cons to attend to meet diverse illustrators and cartoonists. I met Mildred through Wendy, at Flame Con, and I have several pieces of both their art (including Mildred’s amazing graphic novel Agents of the Realm (middle right) and Wendy’s super hilarious Terry Shin print & zine (top left). I recently discovered Queer Indigenous Girl aka Se’mana, through a search to find more indigenous creators. Se’mana is an Akimel Otham, Hopi, Diné, queer disabled neurodivergent femme.
For more queer creators, check out Mey’s roundup of “Queer and Trans Women and Nonbinary Creators To Support This Holigay Season.”
Holigay Gift Guide: Gear For The Traveling Photographer
Illustration by Sophie Argetsinger
I spend a large portion of my time shooting away from home so here’s some stuff I use and love and/or want really badly. If you know someone who likes to travel and/or take photos, maybe they’ll like this stuff too.
Honestly, though, I should warn you now: if you’re buying gifts for a photographer (especially a photographer who travels), my best advice is to run far away — all your money and their money will be gone because this is some serious “if you give a mouse a cookie” stuff. But, on the upside, you’re going to have cute pictures of yourself and maybe go to some wild places. Don’t say I didn’t warn you!
First, packing:
For backpacks, I use this Herschel. Super simple luggage is great for carrying on or if you want a super stylish weekender. I love everything that Rains makes.
For a reliable no frills big bag, try the Eagle Creek No Matter What Flatbed. (Also anything Eagle Creek.)
If you’re packing a duffle, I ENDORSE CUBES, unless you’re into chaos or like digging through your tent in the dark for those warm socks.
For packing your camera, this camera cooler is super great because it will keep your equipment cool in hot climates, and you can pack some beverages. Or be stylish with this super cute leather satchel. And don’t forget your toiletries bag. I like the Herschel Supply Co. Chapter Travel Kit and this Multi Pocket Full Grain Leather bag.
And some accessories:
I can sleep in the dirt but when I’m on a plane I need my neck pillow, sleep mask, ear plugs, etc. And hey has your phone ever died and do you also drop things? This portable charger is my favorite and the only one I haven’t broken yet. If you’re in the woods, a protest zone, or a festival porta-potty at night, a headlight is super important. Also this is a fun way to light your photos in the woods at night if you don’t want to use a flash and, to be honest, I’d rock this super practical dad hat and honestly I just need this mug for daily use.
And some accessories for the camera:
All cameras want to be dressed up, right? How about this cute camera strap?
The next two items aren’t super pretty but if you (or whoever you’re shopping for) is looking to go pro and has multiple cameras/lenses, these two things are essentials in the field.
Shooting with two cameras can be a nightmare – this is best double strap on the market (IMO), and can be separated into two separate straps without causing major back pain. Couple this Think Tank Photo Steroid Speed Belt with this lens bag, a belt for quick lens changes and you’re locked and loaded. (Also if you want to look even cooler I often wear a vest.)
Now for the cameras:
These point and shoots are great for travel and taking instagram pics and general pretty picture making.
My most used camera, the actual best for traveling, the best investment I’ve ever made is the Fujifilm X100T.
If you just want an inexpensive option for casual use this COOLPIX is v cool.
A good mid-range is the Canon PowerShot and if you’re really looking to ball Leica is Queen.
For 35mm film cameras I recommend searching for used ones at thrift shops, flea markets, and online, or this is probably the best one you can buy new. For medium format, same thing, buy used, or why not ball out.
Also I use this instant camera all the time. I have at least 8 actual vintage polaroid cameras that can now shoot on the new impossible film but I find this one to be far superior in color, development time/ease, cost, and lifespan of the images. But like will someone please buy me this because the mint green would look so cute in my life and go with my dreams of having a mint green vespa for aesthetic reasons only.
Now for the big cameras…
Important note: I shoot Canon so I put Canon cameras because I know about them and can speak on them. Nikon and Sony and all the other brands are also great I’m just inexperienced with them. They are extremely comparable so just Google any of these cameras with the word “comparison” and the internet will help you out. My only advice is that once you start buying lenses for one, you stick with that brand. Also it’s my understanding that if you are interested in video, Canon is a better way to go (but please comment if I’m wrong; I don’t mess with moving images). Also please comment other cameras you like.
The Rebel T5 will fulfill your basic needs. It’s a good DSLR and a great place to start building your kit (you want to invest in lenses over camera bodies, especially when you are starting out. Cameras will change, lenses don’t). There is also a newer camera out, the T6, but the improvements aren’t significant enough (IMO) to warrant the higher price tag.
If you feel like you need more than the capabilities of the T5, check out the 80D. Additional features not included with the T5 includes a swivel touch screen, Wi-Fi for phone transfer, better resolution, larger files, better handling in low light, and a mic jack in case you want to do video.
I shoot on a the 5D mk iii, which is an amazing camera but I don’t recommend it unless you need it. Most people don’t need the full frame sensor or the huge file size, and it lacks a lot of the elements people look for in a consumer camera: it does not have an onboard flash, there’s no Wi-Fi, there’s no touch screen, and the settings aren’t as intuitive. I often see super wealthy tourists shooting on these (or even pricier cameras) on full auto and honestly any of the point and shoots listed above will take significantly better photos on auto. Buy the 5D if you have outgrown a more inexpensive camera, and if you know you need it.
And if you buy a DSLR you’re going go to need a lens (remember what I said about giving a mouse a cookie?).
Your lens is the most important investment and the better the lens, the better the image. It makes a much bigger difference than whatever camera you shoot on (above a certain level). Ideally, you buy a lens and it will grow with you as you upgrade your cameras.
Spend on a lens before you spend on a body. Most of the above cameras will have purchase options for kit lenses. All of those are perfectly fine for starting out so go with whatever there is a deal on honestly. Here are some shout-outs though:
Buy this affordable basic starter 50mm. A 50 is super classic, and you will definitely become a better photographer if you learn on a fixed lens because it will force you to move around and to know your frame.
When you want to start making investments, try this beautiful, all purpose zoom lens. The step-up is my most used lens (I use the older version, but it has been going strong for almost ten years).
My fave lens is this fixed 24, and it’s what lives on my camera for all street and event work.
If you want more lens advice, or like to talk about cameras (can you tell I’m into them?), hit me up.
Okay, and just for fun let’s talk about drones for a second. They’re terrifying but also really fun, especially for aerial landscapes or also probably lurking (I do not recommend that, though). This is the more affordable option if you have a GoPro. If you’re looking to ball, I use this and it’s great but — protip! — practice flying in an open space or you might crash it into your girlfriend’s face. (I’M NOT SAYING THAT HAPPENED but yeah that definitely happened.)
Now for sleep:
I usually end up sleeping in my sleeping bag even if there’s a bed. It’s my space, and I kind of made a habit out of it whether I’m crashing at someone’s house, in my car, or in the woods. I have experience with these two and they are both great: the Aleutian and the Cat’s Meow.
This pillow is amazing (also, I need one, so).
And I don’t always stay in hotels so bringing my own travel towel is pretty key.
This wins my vote for most affordable and easy tent and this is a close second. If you’re an avid backpacker and camper and are looking to spend, this is probably the best one on the market. Also because I normally travel for work and don’t have a family, these are all lightweight, two person tents.
And finally, stay warm and look fly.
Aggressively Adorable Gifts to Make the Long-Distance Dating Struggle a Little Easier
Illustration by Sophie Argetsinger
My girlfriend and I started dating when I lived in Chicago and she lived in Brooklyn. We were introduced by mutual friends while I was filming a webseries in New York, and neither of us thought our quick attraction to one another would turn into anything more than an on-and-off fling that we’d pick up whenever I was in town for production. But even after just one night together, we started texting almost every day. I came back to New York and we spent every second we could together. She came to Chicago. Not long after, we realized we had fallen into a relationship. And not just any relationship: a long-distance relationship.
By then, I considered myself an expert in long-distance dating. Every relationship I’ve ever been in has been long-distance for an extended period of time — something I never planned and yet makes sense to me given the way I’ve always formed close relationships with people who live far away from me in the form of intense internet friendships. But my girlfriend was mostly new to the long-distance life, and we both struggled with being apart. There were little things that made it easier: simultaneously watching Parenthood and The L Word and Jessica Jones while texting each other, writing each other letters loaded with longing, counting down the days until we would be together again. One time, we stayed on the phone with each other overnight, sleeping with our ears close to our phones, occasionally waking up to the sound of each other’s breathing and rustling on speaker. Thinking about it now, a 10-hour phone call seems excessive, but at the time, it felt so right.
You can find a DIY guide to gifts for your long-distance love here. But if DIY isn’t quite your thang, the following is a list of things you can buy this holiday season for a partner who might not be in the same city as you but is always on your mind.
Memory Boxes
It can be as simple as a plain old shoebox, but something that you can fill with personal notes and keepsakes makes for a special gift—one that can be used for the entirety of your relationship. There are some fancier options, like the personalized memory box from the New York Times (support journalism while preserving memories!).
Wood Memory Box // KindNotes Keepsake Jar // Letters to the Love Of My Life Box // New York Times Personalized Memory Box
Love Notes
Some of these can be sappy as heck, but I’ve found from personal experience that nothing brings out someone’s sappy side quite like a long-distance relationship. And writing love letters can be intimidating to a lot of people, so here are some gifts that will help you out on that front while still allowing you to put your own personalized twist on them. (If you’re thinking of getting just a plain memory box, these are the kinds of things you can put in it!)
Circle Journey Correspondence Kit // Letters To My Love // What I Love About Us Journal // Fill In The Love Postcard Set
Snuggle Surrogates
Long-distance can be hard in the sex department, but when my girlfriend and I were apart for all those months, physical contact in general was something I craved on a daily basis. My girlfriend often confessed to snuggling her pillow and pretending it was me. One time, she even sent me a Snapchat of her pillow with my face drawn on it. It’s hard to replace real touch, but send your lover something to hold onto when you can’t be there.
Standard Body Pillow // Kiss Me Lips Pillow // Hello Beautiful Pillow // Total Body Pillow (I think this is for pregnant people but OMG it looks so comfy)
Things to Keep Them Warm
Along the same lines as the snuggle surrogates, here are some gifts to keep ’em warm when you can’t lend your body heat.
Fluffy Super Soft Beanie // ASOS Hooded Cape // Fleece Leggings // Fleece-Lined Flannel // Love Throw Blanket // Plaid Throw Blanket
Jewelry
Again, jewelry specifically catered to long-distance couples can get very sappy very fast (so many variations on the “key to my heart” cliché), but I found some that I think are nice without being Too Much.
ASOS Rose Gold Sterling Silver Heart Knot Ring // Custom Coordinates Wrap Ring // ASOS Gold Plated Heart Choker // One Day Closer Bracelet // I Love You/I Know Rings // I Love You To The Moon And Back Necklace
Home Goods to Make Them Think of You
One of the first gifts I bought for my girlfriend was a handmade mug, because while I thought about her throughout my days in Chicago, I realized she was always especially on my mind in the mornings and just before I went to sleep. Here are some miscellaneous goodies your boo can put around their house, with a focus on gifts that will make mornings alone a little brighter.
Miss You A Latte Coffee Spoon // Customizable Long Distance Mug Set // Photo Glass Coasters // Inside Out Heart Cup and Saucer Set
App-Controlled Sex Toys
Depending on how long you’ve been long-distance, sexting has probably become a fairly regular part of your life. Sex toys that can be controlled remotely by mobile apps will take your sexting game to the next level.
We-Vibe Sync // OhMiBod blueMotion Remote Vibrator
More Tech to Ease the Distance
Letters and care packages are definitely nice, but the main way I communicated and connected with my girlfriend when we were apart was via the wonderful world of technology. Seriously, don’t ever let someone who is not in a long-distance relationship tell you that you’re on your phone too much. They probably wouldn’t understand. Recently, I’ve joked to my girlfriend that the new iOS update for Apple products would have made our lives so much easier if it came out while we were still long-distance… iMessage has so many neato features now! But here are some easy gadget gifts to make constant texting/FaceTiming/phone-calling a little easier.
Portable Charger // Logitech HD Webcam // Bluetooth Earpiece // I Love You To The Moon And Back Phone Cases
Holigay Gift Guide 2016: More Super Cute Stuff Made by Women Indie Artists
Illustration by Sophie Argetsinger
We know the holiday season can become a Commerce Festival, but at Autostraddle, we rely on affiliate income to pay our bills, and these gift guides are a huge part of that! Basically, if you buy a product through an affiliate link on our site, we get a percentage of the sale (between 2%-15%, depending on the company.) All the products linked in our guides are either through merchants we have affiliate relationships with or through independent makers who don’t offer affiliate marketing but definitely deserve your money. Thanks in advance for your support!
I feel weird every year about gifting. It’s something I absolutely love doing, when I can do it right—find that one perfect thing that someone will love. But if I’m unsure, or worst of all I gift them something they already have, I fall into a puddle of anxiety.
I also feel somewhat complicated about celebrating a holiday through consumption, and about contributing to a capitalist system that has not exactly worked out for us, historically. These are my own hangups, but the result is that I’ve worked to spend my queer dollars with intention—especially this year. I’ve been seeking out independent artists, illustrators, designers, makers, and weirdos to support when I search for gifts, especially from my fellow queers, women, and people of color.
As often happens when you intentionally diversify your actions, this has also resulted in my finding really unique, beautiful, and cool stuff. It’s also continued to enable my serious Etsy problem, but on the other hand, look at this awesome list of gorgeous stuff I’ve put together for you—all of it designed and/or created by at least one woman or nonbinary artist!
Stuff For Your House
Astrology Watercolor Print by Jade and Serif. I like a lot of this Alabama-based illustrator’s typographic work, but I know y’all will be into this one.
Notebook Set by Dorcas Creates. I love this so much. Beautiful, celebratory notebooks for all the excellent black ladies in your life.
Summer Fruit Lithograph by plant planet. LA-Based artist Claire Nereim also has prints of flowers that only bloom at night and poisonous plants.
Eight Years of Daily Purchases by Kate Bingaman-Burt. Kate is one of my favorite illustrators, and I got the amazing opportunity to meet her when she visited my studio last year. This isn’t the space for me to sit and brag, but I did want to mention that she began this project when she was deeply in debt as a form of self-punishment. At the time, she hated drawing, and she decided that if she drew everything she bought, she may be more thoughtful about her buying choices. Well, eight years go by, she gets her financial situation under control, and she develops a newfound love of drawing as contemplative practice and becomes an illustrator. This amazing poster/newspaper print is the result.
“Exit With A Kiss” Shower Curtain by Meike Legler. This Berlin-based artist mostly makes pillows but I just think this is so fun!
Grande Punto Blanket hand-knit by Ohhio. I love these huge knits, so chunky, so cozy! This makes me immediately want a very big book and some tea.
Lambchop mug by Ashley Hardy. These are just so cool and weird.
Stuff To Put Stuff In
Suki Dances Tote, illustrated by UK artist Laura Hastings. If you’re ever forced to leave the house and carry things, you can do it as you celebrate dancing naked throughout the house.
Kween Tote by Kristina Micotti. If this particular tote isn’t your style, Kristina hand-paints them and has a massive sale on them going right now.
Ceramic baby sloth bowl by Barruntado. I featured this team last year, and I’m doing it again because literally everything they make is so cute I want to die.
Greenhouse Daybag by Esther Sandler. Melbourne-based textile designer makes gorgeous, bright print bags. Also of note: her adorable print of Australian animals.
Can’t-Kill Cactus Vase by ceramicist Bea Bellingham. Suffering from sad succulents? Here’s a cute, kill-proof solution.
Sculptural Urchin Pots by Cat Brown. Treat your plant babies well.
Stuff For Your Appendages
Materia#1 by depeapa. Verónica de Arriba is one of my favorite artists, and I love this blocky, hip necklace style.
Porcelain Ceramic Ring. These handmade rings by ceramicist Dai Li are all stackable, unique, and super cool.
Minimal semicircle wire earrings by Monochromatiques
Sunday Night Pizza Night Socks. ?Pizza Socks!!!?
Tan Line Butt Socks. ? Butt Socks!!! ? (Also of note from the CoucouSuzette shop: boob pins.)
Little Lovers Hand-printed scarf by BonbiForest. Also of note: These lovely little Be Brave pins.
Stuff To Put On Your Body
Egg Boob Shirt by Saggy Bee Design. It’s boobs! On your boobs! That are eggs!
Cat Person Collection Color Fusion Sweater. This is a very weird-looking cat and I’m so here for it. Traveler Misha Gazel finds a lot of strange cat fabrics and makes them into wonderful sweaters for your enjoyment.
Annabelle-Mesh and Velvet Lingerie Set by Danielle Wood. This has everything for your favorite femme: mesh! Velvet! High waists! Garter straps!!! If I could get away with only wearing this forever, I would do it.
The Glasgow red velvet bowtie by Wickham House. This is a husband-and-wife team who make the nicest, classiest bow ties I’ve seen around.
Flopsided Pastel Femme Space Queen Sports Bra and here is the bottom by Rebirth Garments. Okay, I cannot say enough about these awesome folx. They make “gender-nonconforming lingerie for all bodies,” and they really mean it. Each object of clothing loudly celebrates our physical idiosyncrasies—this outfit that I’ve featured, for example, is for people who may have one breast larger than the other. They’ll work with you to make something that not only works for your body, uniquely, but celebrates its individuality. Also of note: one of the funnest binders I’ve ever seen.
Sky-Blue Bikini Swimsuit Top and here is the bottom. Swim in the water, look like the sky. Nina Ribena sources her fabrics around London and describes her stuff as “Dance as disinhibition, voguing, genderfuck, rave culture, empowered women and sportswear.” I’m sold.
Wink Pocket Dress by BZRShop. Tiffany Ju used to only make my favorite tights; now she makes my dream outfits. This dress is just so weird and great.
Stuff To Put On a Denim Vest
Awkward Lady Pin by Awkward Ladies Club. I love awkwardness!!
Jungle Greenhouse Broach. UK Artist Kate Rowland makes these darling little wooden illustrations and I just love them. Psst—she also has a feminist one and a bookworm one.
Minty Monstera pin by Pardon my Tone. This woman designs and produces these beautiful, pastel-colored enamel pins. I want every single one.
“Cool” patch from Gilly Press. Passive-aggressively declare yourself!!
Embroidered collar pins by İrem Yazıcı. So cool!
Bad Feeling Pin by Hilda Palafox. Just to be obvious about it.
LGBT/Queer/Transgender Buttons by Bimblesnoot. Um, finally, pronoun/pride buttons that are cute and fun and well-designed and include many different options! If you’re more of a punk type, check out these Aggressively Queer and badass pronoun buttons from Blindfold Ambition.
Fight like a Grrrl patch. From one of my fave feminist shops, CreepyGals. Warn people not to mess with you.
Stuff for Your Bookshelf
Peach Spell Book from Sarah McNeil, a zinester and risographist (is that a word? it is now) from Australia. I could buy every single one of her books, but I especially love this one, full of hand-drawn spells for your day-to-day.
2017 Pocket Planner by DOZI. Wendy Chung began as an engineer but became fascinated by color and pattern and started this fantastic design shop. Get 2017 off to a very handsome start, god knows we need it.
An Illustrated Guide to Cocktails by Elizabeth Graeber. Get better at making drinks, and do it with the cutest watercolor animals. Also of note: her zines Should I Get Bangs? and A Field Guide to Redheads: An Illustrated Celebration.
Queer Indigenous Girl Issue 1: a “handwritten perzine including an artist intro, O’Otham culture, health tips, reading recommendations and the artist’s experience of living with ADHD.” Really great.
Planters, boobs, and lava lamp zine from fellow Texan, Lilah Shepherd. What’s not to like?
The Sorriest Little Book by Penelope Gazin. This book is a great way to do a very hard thing, which is to apologize to someone you love. Penelope is one of my favorite illustrators, so if you don’t have anyone you currently need to apologize to, I strongly recommend you consider getting a surprise instead.
P.S.—Need to wrap all these gifts? Here’s a lovely option.
How Olivia Became The Most Successful Lesbian Business Of All Time
“Women’s culture is exploding,” announced an article in the second issue of the short-lived women’s music magazine “Paid My Dues.” It was 1974, and Olivia Records, a collective formed by 21-year-old Judy Dlugacz and four friends a year prior with a $4,000 loan and zero experience, was announcing its existence and calling for help: “[Lesbians] are expressing ourselves in a multitude of ways and we are affecting people and changing lives because of it. Unfortunately, our efforts are either inaccessible to large numbers of women, or they are controlled by men.” Olivia wanted to step in and start their own system before the already-existing-system gobbled up the music that was giving so many women so much life. They wanted to employ women as engineers, producers, financial managers, promoters, distributors, accountants, lawyers and musicians. They wanted women to be in charge of getting music that “speaks from all our experiences and towards all our thoughts and emotions” to the women who needed to hear it.
Financial independence from the patriarchy was a primary goal of lesbian feminism, because true liberation required not relying on men for anything, including money. It’s a tricky thing to pull off now and was even harder back then. But, somehow, Olivia did it. It wasn’t easy, and it eventually required a complete pivot, shifting their focus in the early ’90s from recording to travel. But 40 years later, they are the biggest lesbian-owned lesbian-targeted business out there, making it perhaps the most successful lesbian business story in American history.
The slow extinction of dedicated virtual and real spaces for queer and lesbian women has been a hot topic over the last few years as lesbian bookstores, bars and magazines have shuttered at alarming rates. Often it is men at the helm of the larger companies that choose to close their lesbian properties, but survival generally isn’t much easier for companies that have chosen to go it without any male involvement, either.
Olivia Records experienced enormous success, but even that enormous success was barely enough to make ends meet. “We lived together, worked together,” Olivia CEO Judy Dlugacz told me. “I would get my expenses dealt with and have $15 of spending money left over for the first 5-7 years of Olivia.”
Some Olivia Records releases
Olivia provided countless women with training and support to become recording artists and technicians and went through a lot of evolution and transformation, including abandoning its initial collective structure and expanding at one point with a short-lived side label. “Nothing stopped us,” Dlugacz recalled. “Not the change in relationships, nothing stopped us. Because we believed so strongly that this would work and it did. [Our sales were] unheard of for an independent label and it happened because there was such a need for what we were doing. It was an explosion of consciousness.”
Judy Dlugacz, doing business
In 1982, Olivia hosted two sold-out 10th anniversary shows at Carnegie Hall, starring Cris Williamson and Meg Christian. It was, then, the venue’s largest single-grossing event of all time. Not that there was any press around this achievement, of course. Olivia survived on the passion of its own fans, ostracized as they often were from mainstream attention, recognition, or support. “We’re small,” Dlugacz said of the lesbian community. “We’re a small slice of the population. Community has to support you or you won’t be there.”
Still, even as the label grew and became increasingly powerful and well-known, the women of Olivia were still barely getting by. “After 1982 it was really hard,” Dlugacz told Hot Wire magazine in 1994. “[Olivia] kept going because, quite literally, the artists and I wouldn’t let it go. We simply didn’t let it go. From every standpoint, it probably should have stopped around the tenth year. Between the tenth year and the seventeenth year was very, very difficult. Money-wise it was impossible, Olivia was financially not viable. But we did everything we could to stay around, because there was no question the need was there.”
“As a record company we made about 40 albums of music, sold 2 million records and hundreds and hundreds of concerts and had pretty nice sized mailing list,” Dlugacz told me. Then, in 1989, an attendee at one of their concerts suggested, “wouldn’t it be great to have a concert on the water.” Judy was lit up with the idea: “I went, oh my god, that’s the next thing to do! Place a concert on the water, on a cruise. I was thinking about doing it around the Bay. I was thinking, Oh my God, vacations for women. I can do that.”
In 1990, Dlugacz put down a $50,000 deposit to charter a cruise ship and wrote to Olivia fans announcing a 4-day trip to the Bahamas. Within a few weeks, 600 women had signed up. They decided to add a second back-to-back cruise to the itinerary to meet demand, and that one filled up real quick too. In October, they hosted a Halloween Cruise to the Eastern Caribbean, and returned to the Bahamas twice in 1991. Passengers were thrilled to experience a space where it was truly safe to be who they were, and meet like-minded women. They also were drawn to the vacations for the opportunity to see performances by Olivia recording artists. Performers on the first voyage included Dianne Davison, Donyell Carter, Teresa Trull, Deidre McCalla, Tret Fure, Lucie Blue Tremblay and Cris Williamson. The shows were emceed by comedian Marga Gomez.
Olivia’s Maiden Voyage, February 1990 (courtesy of Olivia Travel)
By 1994, the company had nine full-time and three-part time employees with an annual budget of $4 million, according to an article in Hot Wire magazine. Half their income came from the cruise business, and music and catalog sales accounted for a quarter each. “Olivia — with her artists — has reached more lesbians than any other institution in the world, and has helped change their lives,” Dlugacz declared in a speech at their 20th Anniversary concert in 1993. “Olivia has helped open the closet doors for so many, and has removed the isolation and stigma for so many more who thought they were the only ones. We had virtually no help from the recording industry or the media, who saw us as an enigma and so often as a personal threat.”
The last CD produced and distributed by Olivia Records was 1993’s “Postcards from Paradise,” featuring Cris Williamson & Tret Fure. Coincidentally, Olivia’s future would entail sending a lot of postcards from paradise, as the travel wing of the enterprise continued to flourish while the “women’s music” movement was picked up by the mainstream. Olivia’s artists paved the way for other musicians working in the genre to go big, like Tracy Chapman and k.d. Lang.
Meanwhile, Olivia was chartering more and more vacations every year to pretty much everywhere in the world: China, Africa, The Galapagos Islands, The Spanish Riviera, Australia, Tahiti and even Antarctica. Dlugacz told me they had to do a lot of work with the cruise crews, even though many were hesitant to charter to a lesbian group, worried that they’d lose more conservative customers if they caught wind of it. Now companies are eager to charter to Olivia, and she recognizes that “we helped to really change the whole world of travel from a very homophobic one — even internally, in terms of their own staff.” It felt like a natural evolution from what Olivia had done in the music industry, where they also changed the perception of what women could do and what they could pay.
In 2000, when Olivia cruisers singlehandedly rescued a lagging Turkish economy by spending over half a million dollars over three days and three ports-of-call, other ports paid attention and were eager to welcome cruisers to their shores, too. And in 2002, Olivia Recording Artists Meg Christian and Cris Williamson reunited for a concert — their first together since the Carnegie Hall show. Other Olivia vacations have featured talent like Sarah McLachlan, kd lang, Wanda Sykes, Melissa Etheridge, Lily Tomlin, Margaret Cho, Ruby Rose, The Indigo Girls, Mary Chapin Carpenter, Whoopi Goldberg, Martina Navratilova and Leisha Hailey.
In 2004, Olivia partnered with The L Word for a memorable second season episode that truly features Peak Jenny as well as Alice and Dana’s bold forays into sexual role-play. In 2006, Olivia announced record annual revenues of $20 million. Throughout it all, the company remained both charitable and politically active, recently raising money for Hillary Clinton and formerly partnering with a gay male cruise company in 2010 to form the American Red Cross LGBT Haiti Relief Fund. In 2012, Judy Dlugaz was appointed to Obama’s LGBT Leadership Council.
Judy performs a marriage ceremony onboard an Olivia Cruise in 1993
According to Dlugacz, the best part of every trip remains the same for her: “when someone comes up to me and they don’t just thank me, they say Oh my God I had no idea how it felt to be in such a freeing environment where lesbians are the majority, I can’t imagine going home and not being like this, my life has changed forever in these seven days.”
But in the early days, Olivia’s work wasn’t just about making a safe place for lesbians to connect with each other, it was also to spread the Lesbian Feminist gospel that the purest form of feminism for all women was one that didn’t rely on men for romantic relationships, either. Dlugacz explained, “We didn’t have any money but we had to do it because we believed this is the way, music is such a powerful way, we believed that if every woman knew about Lesbian Feminism, they’d all come out, and the world would change.”
That particular belief isn’t as popular these days as it once was, and that’s just one of many things that have changed rapidly over the course of Olivia’s lifetime. But even now when acceptance is very high in certain parts of the country, many lesbians still have to remain closeted for their survival, and most lesbians can really benefit psychologically from the freedoms one experiences in a lesbian-exclusive space.
Cruisers in 1993
“When we started Olivia we were a bunch of radical lesbian feminists,” she remembers. “I’d just gotten out of college and we were an amazing group of women who loved music and you know, it was an incredible time to be coming out. But at the same time we understood that if we wanted to do something we wouldn’t burn out on, we had to have an economic component where people actually made a living doing the work.”
This is where the cavern between the dream and the reality opens up and swallows lesbian businesses whole. But Olivia made a deliberate pivot… and survived.
It bears mentioning that in our short lifespan, we’ve undergone a similar evolution: we brought people together via the internet, via the words we shared online with a growing community of readers. We didn’t have concerts, we had meet-ups. The way we decided to bring everybody together from all over the world wasn’t on a boat, but atop a mountain. And soon enough, that wing of our business became way more profitable than the original (this website). With the help of A+ memberships, we hope to keep both going strong for as long as possible.
At the end of our interview, Judy had some encouraging words about Autostraddle. “I think that what you guys are doing is really important and revolutionary,” Judy told me. “You’re keeping the connection and community alive in another way. There aren’t the same routes for lesbians to connect that there were when we started. When we started it was concerts, it was music. Records were the first internet, they were a way lesbians could connect and know there were other lesbians out there. It was an opportunity to connect, and what you’re doing is creating opportunities to be aware and to connect. That’s absolutely essential. Or we’ll just go back to being isolated.”
We’re super excited to be partnering with Olivia, and can’t wait to hang out with all these amazing women at the beginning of November in Ixtapa, Mexico! Need a last minute vacation? Come join us!
Dates: November 5th–12th 2016
Where? The all-inclusive Club Med Resort in Ixtapa, Mexico.
What? Beaches, pool parties, lesbian trivia, butch yoga, comedy nights, dancing, drinking with a bajillion queer women. Plus jungle excursions, kayaking and pool volleyball for all the sporty queers (I see you!).
Who? Riese, Abby, Kaylah and Sarah are gonna be there, plus a whole other cast of queer ladies, including Cameron Esposito and Rhea Butcher.
Cost: For solo travelers, Olivia is offering $999 with the code AS16. Find out more here. Olivia is also offering a Gal Pal discount, which means if you bring another human, it’s $699 each. Call (800) 631-6277 and mention code AS16.
Discover more about the entertainment, lodging and vacation here.
31 Halloween-Worthy Socks for the Costume Averse
You know that trick on St. Paddy’s Day where you just say, “Oh yeah, my underwear’s green” so you don’t get pinched? That doesn’t really work on Halloween — which is unfortunate because Halloween is all about tricks and treats, and frankly underwear falls into both of those categories.
If you’re someone who finds the idea of wearing an ostentatious costume out in public, or even to a private gathering, akin to being held down and ticked on the bottoms of your feet until you cry or throw up, don’t worry. These socks are funny, cute, ugly, cute-ugly, and/or spooky enough to get you through it. You will make it to Thanksgiving! Cross our fake-cobwebbed hearts.
1. X Ray Knee High Socks
I see you girl. Shaking that… tibia.
2. Batnado Socks
Because you’ve always wanted to be a goth witch sharknado.
3. Goodbye Kitty Knee Highs
You say goodbye and I say Hello Kitty Knees!
4. Edgar Allan Poe-ka Dots Socks
Quoth the raven, “Nevermore will I leave the house without these socks.”
5. Give ‘Em Pumpkin to Talk About Socks
Trick or treat, smell my… AWESOMENESS.
6. Ouija Socks
BYOPlanchette.
7. Mermaid Socks
Because you’ve always wanted to have fins instead of legs, you slippery Pisces you.
8. 3D Cat Socks
I truly cannot figure out what makes these socks 3D. Is it the ears? They are cute as hell, regardless.
9. Grumpy Cat “This is My Costume” Crew Socks
Say everything you need to say without uttering a word.
10. Gryffindor Knee High Socks
What’s Latin for “Hands off, Muggles!”
11. Ghost Socks
The spookiest thing is how happy these ghosts look while doing what appears to be the can-can.
12. Constellation Socks
Betcha can’t find my Big Dipper.
13. Sandal Socks
Meet the jeggings of shoes and socks. Shocks. They cannot be unseen.
14. Ruby Slipper Socks
These Ruby Slipper socks also happen to be slipper socks. TWO FOR ONE.
15. Shark Socks
This shark bit off more than it could boo. #notsorry
16. White Tiger Socks
Anytime someone asks you about your costume, hard sell them on donating to the World Wildlife Fund.
17. Wonder Woman Knee-High Socks WITH CAPES
My socks aren’t jealous your socks are jealous.
18. Composition Socks
This one’s for the Harriet the Spy fans.
19. Bee Socks
You could go full Bee Girl, or you could get these and call it a day.
20. Sailor Moon Uniform Over the Knee Socks
FOR LOVE AND JUSTICE.
21. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Masked Socks
Heroes in a whole sock, turtle power.
22. Ice Cream Dream Socks
Brings new meaning to the term cold feet, amiright? I’ll be here all night.
23. Pikachu Socks
Choose Pikachu, even if you still haven’t played Pokémon Go.
24. Cheshire Car Over-the-Knee Socks
Actually not a bad way to strategically disappear from that awkward Halloween office party after only 25 minutes.
25. Louise Belcher Face Socks
Just in case your roommates go as Bob and Linda for the second year in a row.
26. Taco Socks
Aka your own personal queer girl Bat Signal.
27. Bloody Hell Knee High Socks
Never mind the taco socks, here’s what Halloween is really all about.
28. In-n-Out Drink Cup Socks
Trying wearing them without shoes, animal style.
29. Sheer Ankle Bat Socks
Wear these with sandals… if you DARE.
30. Dancing Skeleton Socks
What’s shakin’, bone daddy?
31. Star Trek Socks
“Not Starfleet. Starfeet!”
Relevant To Your Interests: Let’s Shop Stationery Supplies
When I did our back-to-school Relevant to Your Interests, I mentioned that one of the nerdiest things I’m into (other than D&D of course) is school supplies, pens and stationery. I mentioned also that I listen to three separate stationery podcasts. Then I received tweets, Facebook messages and texts that said things along the lines of, “omg, I am now listening to stationery podcasts.” Which is exactly what I wanted. Come, come join me where my heart lies. Come nerd with me. That is why I write on the internet. So here’s a little explication of the three main stationery podcasts, and a wee little curated shopping list for each one.
Art Supply Posse
I’m starting with Art Supply Posse even though it’s the newest of the three podcasts I’m chatting about today, mostly because I think it’s the most relevant to your interests. Think of this like a sort by relevancy situation. In this case, it’s most relevant because this podcast is hosted by two women: Ana from the Well-Appointed Desk and Heather Rivard, self-proclaimed gay lady. This is a podcast all about art supplies and the people who use them — so it’s not just about which pencils are best. It’s also about what it means to call yourself an artist, or what happens when you get stuck in a creative rut, or what to do when you’re rediscovering the creative spirit within you after all these years. Highly recommend. Also here’s what I’m using while listening to it. You might like it as well.
Prismacolor Nonphoto Blue Pencils (2 pack of 12, $19.43), Winsor & Newton Pigment Markers (set of 12, $43.00), Winsor & Newton marker paper (11X14, $13.79), Stillman & Birn Alpha Sketchbook ( $18.33).
The Erasable Podcast
The Erasable Podcast is all about pencils, if you couldn’t tell, and it’s hosted by Johnny Gamber, Tim Wasem and Andy Welfle. They all get on a Skype call and talk about WriteNotepads and Blackwing Pencils and also what beer they’re drinking. In short, it’s a perfect podcast. Here are some recommendations based on their faves and mine.
Blackwing Palomino 602 pencils (12 per box, $22.95), Write Notepad Pocket Notebook (set of 3, $9.99), Classroom Friendly Pencil Sharpener, ($24.99), General’s Layout Extra Black, ($9.34).
The Pen Addict
The original behemoth of my stationery world, The Pen Addict is the most popular podcast for pen people. It’s hosted by Brad Dowdy and Myke Hurley, and they talk pens, notebooks, inks and pen accessories. I’ve basically just given you a list of my faves on this one.
Pilot Metropolitan (black, medium nib, $13.05), J. Herbin Ink (my favorite color, $10.30), Field Notes Pitch Black Edition (pack of 3, $9.95), Leuchtturm1917 dot grid notebook (fountain pen friendly Moleskine alternative, $28.60).
Shut Up And Take My Money: 15 Super Queer Etsy Stores
I once read an article that dared to claim, “you can’t buy everything at thrift stores.” To which I responded: um, actually? I happen to be sponsored by Value Village, with the exception of one good pair of high-waisted black jeans. Although I guess if I’m being honest, sometimes my wardrobe is expanded by late-night, wine-motivated splurges on ASOS. But the point is: my clothes are gay, now what? Maybe you’re like me and have denim jackets and Doc Martens a-plenty, but you’re thinking: who cares, no big deal, I want more! I have great news for you. There are so many things you can queer your life with: chokers, buttons, zines, prints, coffee mugs, shirts! Everything you can’t find at a thrift store, you can find on Etsy. Specifically, on these shops. You’re welcome and I’m sorry about your savings account.
Jacob Joyce
Femme Supremacy shirt modeled by Rudy Loewe and another cutie, who could that be? (It’s me.)
Jacob Joyce’s Femme Supremacy shirt is my favorite piece of clothing and I wear it at least once a week. Also, their zines will make every queer person of color cry, laugh, and rage with feeling. Their Alphabetical Anthology of White Liberal Proverbs is everything I never knew I needed to heal before I heard it, and their QTIPOC Assemble zine is filled with illustrated conversations of “the radical imaginations of people navigating intersecting oppressions of race, gender and sexuality.” Who I was before their work graced my life, I truly do not know.
Rudy Loewe
Rudy Loewe is the absolute greatest and, I’m lucky to say, a dear friend of mine. Their shirts are the Venn Diagrams of your soul, mapping inconsistencies such as “Loud White Men / Opinions That Matter,” and visualizing what is none of your business: my gender, my sexuality, my body, or where I’m from. Their Etsy shop is currently on hiatus while they adjust after moving, but they plan to re-open shop in early November, so check back then.
Gnat Glitter Kink
Me, shamelessly modeling the Random Plastic Charm Collar
Everything in this store is designed by Gnat Rosa Madrid who makes glittery harnesses, chokers, leashes, and sequined bow ties. The concept is kitschy but super high-quality “femme-centric fetish and bondage gear.” Basically, it’s a dream come true. I’ve tested some of the merchandise myself and I can tell you that if you want to look cute but also get securely thrown around a little, these collars can do that for you.
Rebirth Garments
Rebirth Garments are designed by Sky Cubacub, a Gender Queer Person of Color from Chicago, IL. They make binders and “soft armor” with eye-catching designs and vibrant colors. Personally, I want to bathe in a pool of glitter and then put on these patterns under my mesh shirt and go to the club and dance the night away. The shop is actually on vacation, but definitely follow them on Instagram to get the news when it re-opens!
Kiernan Dunn
Can you imagine anything better than finding a beach, sipping a beer, and wearing this “Wish You Were Queer” shirt? I cannot imagine a single better thing. Kiernan Dunn has so many amazing things on her site, including this realistic as fuck “Femme Life” print, featuring lipstick stains on a juicy burger. Equally delightful is this Smash the Patriarchy shirt, that shows the best tools for patriarchy-smashing: lipstick and wrenches.
Lovestruck Prints
I couldn’t get through writing this sentence without buying something from this store, in case you need a stronger endorsement. Do you see these shirts right now? I want so much to be one-half of that mesh and side-shaven illustrated couple. And yes, you’re reading the other shirt correctly because it does, in fact, say “Dip me in honey and throw me to the lesbians.” Help. SOS. This store has slayed me. Cause of death: fashion.
Black Dress Wild Heart
This store describes itself as “Cute Stuff for Quirky Souls,” but an equally accurate description is “Everything I’m Obsessed With.” I’m gonna hit the top notes here and say that you need this Weed Witch Enamel Pin, and also this Fuck Body Hate glitter pin, or this poster that says “More Riots, Less Diets.” Or you could just do what I did and buy the whole store!
Hannah Daisy
The Truth Is Out There nail decals
Do you want Dana Scully on your fingertips? Or maybe you’re a witch who needs tiny pentagrams and moons for nail decoration. Or maybe you’ve wondered the classic gay thought: what if I took the patches on my denim jacket and made them really tiny and wore them on my fingernails? Don’t worry, Hannah Daisy has you covered for all of your nail art needs. You can also find some really great self-care stickers that will motivate you with slogans like “Sad Not Lazy” and “Fuck Anxiety.”
Mary Mack Wear
Everything would have been different for me if I could have earned a Queer Scout Badge back in the day as a young Girl Scout, but now that this badge exists, everything is a little bit better. Another cool thing is this Queer Scouts poster that shows an array of badges saying things like “Self Healing” and “Operation Sappho.”
LunaSangre
Calling all Latinx folks, all the Brujas, Boriquas, Xingonas: this store is for you. Check out these Nopales dangly earrings, this “Por Que” shirt that asks people to account for their white tears, or these earrings of the Goddess Xochiquetzal. From the store, the artist and designer Aubrey describes that “inspiration is drawn from my ancestors, neighborhood, and southern California barrio clothing of the 1940s/50s. Each piece is sewn, painted, and/or printed by me in my home studio in southern California.”
Kill The Patriarchy
Finally, a one-stop shop for all of your misandry needs! You’ve got your classic misandry and machine gun underwear, and a plus-size feminist pro-choice tank top. What more could you need?
Fox and Brie
This store does a few things very well – namely, bow ties, ties, and pocket squares. There are so many shades of chambray to choose from, as well as really fun patterned items as well. If you need something dapper and unique, definitely check it out.
Wild Fancy Design
I want to give every person I love a delicate hand-stamped piece of brass that eloquently expresses the most important parts of their identity. There’s a pin for the witch in your life, or the femme in your heart, the dandy in the streets, and the stud in the sheets.
Meg Brown Ceramics
Maybe you have the gay wardrobe down, and you’ve got all the buttons and patches to accessorize your gayness, but you’re ready to really step it up. Here’s how: a really gay coffee mug. Meg Brown is here to help, with mugs that say things like “I’m a person, not a gender,” and ask “Am I making you uncomfortable?”
Rory Midhani
So you’ve got your queer wardrobe and your gay coffee mug. The only thing left is to decorate your apartment! Our very own talented Rory Midhani has a bunch of amazing prints for sale on his Etsy, and putting any of them up on your walls will add instant color and queerness.