Boob(s On Your) Tube: “The 100” Swears Lesbian Fealty

It’s only Tuesday and it has already been a week for queer women on TV. You can read my full recap of The Fosters right here and an in-depth analysis of Jane the Virgin‘s season two queerness here. Last night, New Girl revealed that Cece is bisexual and has had a past relationship with Megan Fox, and we’ll have a piece up about that (and how it relates to How to Get Away With Murder and The 100) first thing tomorrow morning. In the meantime, let’s talk about all the other gay TV shenanigans, including Clarke and Lexa and their eternal love.


Younger

maggggie

Wednesdays on TV Land at 10:00 p.m.

It was one of my least favorite kind of Younger episodes this week: All Liza and Josh, and no Maggie or Kelsey or Diana. Actually, Maggie did show up for a hot second, look super fetching in her lounging robe, to advise Liza not to go to New Jersey. Liza did not listen to her. She and Josh went to meet some of Liza’s old friends and she accidentally got high and I accidentally looked up a thing on Urban Dictionary I wish I’d never even heard of. One and a half stars. Needs more Maggie and Lauren.


Arrow

AR413B_0330b

Wednesdays on The CW at 8:00 p.m.

Nyssa was back on Arrow this week! She broke free from her jail cell at League of Assassins HQ and activated a bunch of sleeper agents and murdered a bunch of butt heads, and then she be-bopped on down to Starling City to make a little deal with Oliver. You know how both she and Sara were came back to life from the Lazarus Pit? Well, Sara was resurrected like a whole bloodthirsty person but Thea was resurrected as a half bloodthirsty person and now she’s dying again. Nyssa’s got the cure and she’s willing to give it to him, for the bargain price of him murdering Merlyn.

Oh! And also she met and hung out with Katana for a little bit. Maybe they’ll fall in love.


Top Chef

Thursdays on Top Chef at 10:00 p.m.

topchef

Last week’s Top Chef was part one of Restaurant Wars. Karen was a team captain and her first choice was Marjorie, duh, and their strategy was to serve two delicious meals and let The Bros self-destruct on each other. It was a good plan. Marjorie was the front of the house for the lunch seating (which took place during episode one), and her only misstep was the first time she wasn’t at the hostess table was when the judges showed up. But also she did an awesome trick to get people to move from their tables so she could seat the second round of guests, by asking them to follow her away from their tables for a free glass of champagne. That trick also works on kittens with Whiskas Temptations when they won’t get off the bookshelf! My girlfriend clapped and giggled like a child when Marjorie said, “I like control.” Because when a woman says that it’s awesome because they’re going to get called a bitch for it and they do it anyway (and a man never has to say he likes control because of course he does and he almost always has it).

For her dish for lunch, Karen makes an Asian-marinated flank-steak that the judges thought was delicious and gutsy. Marjorie shut down all the clunky suggestions Isaac made for lunch and turned out a beet salad that was pretty okay, but maybe a little uninspired.
The Bros, as I mentioned, imploded in a cacophony of egos. It was beautiful.

And it was to be continued.


The 100

Thursdays on The CW at 9:00 p.m.

Written by Karly

fealty1

This was the best episode so far of the season and perhaps of the series. A week has passed since Clarke vowed to kill Lexa and she’s been stewing on her anger since. She’s pacing in her sweet prison aka very comfortable bedroom and Lexa enters and gives her a proposition: get the Sky People to join the coalition as the 13th clan and they’ll be safe. All she has to do is bow before Lexa. Clarke refuses because she knows that Lexa only wants Clarke to bow before her as a sign of strength, not unity. “Go float yourself” Clarke says. Lexa hopes this is a maybe.

Kane and Abby have gone to Polis for this Summit to negotiate a treaty with Lexa for long-lasting peace. Kane has grown a gray wisdom beard, or that’s what I imagine it is. He is respectful to the locals, has become fluent in Trigedasleng and all he can focus on is what this peace can mean. Abby is only thinking about getting Clarke home safe, and remarks that Kane should be Chancellor. Fine, but Clarke will always be the leader of SkaiKru.

At Arkadia, Bellamy, Raven and Bellamy’s girlfriend, Gina, head up to Mount Weather to work. Farm Station has moved in and they’re looking very comfortable. Shortly after Bellamy and Raven get settled, Echo, the girl who was held captive next to Bellamy in Mount Weather, is brought in by Arkadia guards. She says the Summit is a trap and the Ice Nation is going to kill everyone. Pike, leader of Farm Station and inexplicably taking control, decides Bellamy, Octavia and he are going to go to Polis while Raven arms the Mount Weather missiles. Why why why.

fealty2 fealty3

In Polis, Clarke meets the Ice Nation prince, Roan, again. He promises her that if she kills Lexa, Clarke can truly be free. At the same time, Lexa’s advisor, Titus, tells Lexa she has to kill Clarke to show the Ice Queen she’s strong. First of all, shut up, the both of you guys. Still, Clarke gets Lexa alone and holds a knife to her throat. But her eyes fill with tears and she can’t go through with it. Lexa apologizes for probably the first time in her commandership, and does only what she can, she says “I release you.” Okay that’s from Carol, but that’s what how the scene went truly.

Instead, Clarke decides she will join Lexa’s coalition as the 13th clan. There’s a really formal ceremony in Lexa’s tower. Lexa has hired a very beautiful woman to sing and up until that point, I think it’s the gayest thing Lexa has ever done. Clarke enters all in Grounder gear, with her face painted and a tattoo on her arm. She kneels before Lexa and the representatives from the 12 clans follow suit. Everything is going according to plan.

Until Pike, Bellamy and Octavia crash the party to save everyone from this “imminent threat.” Echo has abandoned them, obviously, because this was a diversion. Echo was actually leading Arkadia’s warriors away from Mount Weather, where an Ice Nation assassin has snuck in.

Raven was trying to figure out the missile codes but has a crisis of confidence. Sinclair reassures her like so many dudes have done in the past. Sigh. This tender moments means they completely miss this assassin stabbing Gina a million times and rigging Mount Weather to explode. Raven and Sinclair narrowly escape the bomb and report to Bellamy what has happened. The Ice Nation representative claims responsibility and Lexa has him and Roan arrested. There’s general chaos and, dammit, things were going so well.

The Sky People go back to Arkadia to deal with the casualties and secure their borders. Clarke stays behind to be a representative from the 13th clan (and to “make sure Lexa keeps her word” uh huh). Whoever blew up Mount Weather knew the launch codes for their missiles. We find out at the end it’s the Guard that was captured by the Sky People in season 2. Asshole.

So Lexa and Clarke are back in the ceremony room, except everyone else has left. Clarke is still a little confrontational when Lexa thanks her for staying in Polis. “If you betray me again…” Clarke warns. But Lexa assures her she will never. Then she kneels in front of a stunned Clarke and says my future wedding vows “I swear fealty to you, Clarke kom SkaiKru. I vow to treat your needs as my own and your people as my people.” Clarke reaches out and helps Lexa to her feet and they stand there looking at each other. The way Lexa looks Clarke as she speaks the words, the way she looks away when she touches Clarke’s hand, and the way we absolutely know she would never do this for anyone but Clarke still affects me the same way days later. I haven’t felt this moved by a scene between two women in a very long time. It’s too bad the Ice Queen is intending to kill them both but that’s a problem for next Thursday.


Legends of Tomorrow

Thursdays on The CW at 8:00 p.m.

DC's Legends of Tomorrow -- "Blood Ties" -- Image LGN103A_0110b2.jpg -- Pictured (L-R): Arthur Darvill as Rip Hunter, Wentworth Miller as Leonard Snart/Captain Cold, Franz Drameh as Jefferson "Jax" Jackson and Caity Lotz as Sara Lance/White Canary -- Photo: Cate Cameron/The CW -- © 2016 The CW Network, LLC. All Rights Reserved.

I suppose it’s not surprising that Sara’s getting so much story and screen time in the early episodes of Legends; we did know her for a long time and pitch quite a collective fit when she was murdered on Arrow. This week’s episode treads a little bit of old ground, but for the first time on this show. Sara has the bloodlust, remember, from getting resurrected in the Lazarus Pit, and this week it flares up and she almost does a bunch of unnecessary killings. But! She does not, and more even than learning to control her murder desires, she actually convinces Rip that he needs a team and he’s gotta stop trying to do everything all by himself and she can help him — they can all help him — if he will just relax and give up a little bit of control and trust them. He decides that is exactly what he will do.

Next week they’re going to the ’80s, and I honestly cannot wait to see what Sara wears. The period costuming is excellent on this show. So cheesy and so fun.


Black Sails

Saturday on Starz at

Well, Max and Anne broke up this week. It was inevitable but also kind of sad. Anne’s in love with Max. Max is in love with the island. And also she doesn’t know it yet, but Eleanor is thiiiiiis close to reaching Nassau’s shores. Anne and Max have a really lovely breakup, though. Max shares a part of her childhood with Anne, about how she was a slave and she saw her father playing with and loving his “legitimate” daughter, and it made her so sad, and now she needs a hundred billion dollars in gold. Probably the sweetest thing Anne has ever done in her life is to tell Max that she trusts her to count out their gold and split it evenly between the two of them. Also it’s the saddest thing Anne has ever done.

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Heather Hogan

Heather Hogan is an Autostraddle senior editor who lives in New York City with her wife, Stacy, and their cackle of rescued pets. She's a member of the Television Critics Association, GALECA: The Society of LGBTQ Entertainment Critics, and a Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer critic. You can also find her on Twitter and Instagram.

Heather has written 1718 articles for us.

74 Comments

  1. I’m not saying I told you so, when last year some of ya’ll said that Clarke and Lexa was a “blink and you’ll miss it” and it “wasn’t worth watching for the queer content”, and some of us pointed out that it was part of a carefully built up storyline that was going to reverberate through the series. Nope, I was wrong, I am saying I TOLD YOU SO!THIS SHOW IS THE BEST AND QUEEREST!

    * But an I told you so said with deep love for all you dedicated straddler pop culturers do.

    • I think it’s just hard to get your hopes up when you’ve been doing this for SO LONG and been wrong SO MANY TIMES. I’m very very very happy with where this story has gone and continues to go, but I would have been bummed if last season had been the end of it. I think queer The 100 fandom owes itself a real big pat on the back, for being smart and awesome in the way they talked to the writers. I think this is a direct result of that!

      • Oh I totally understand! There have been so many shows that seemed like they were going to be great and then fell so terribly.

        I just loved that show so much I was a sad kitten when Autostraddle only liked it instead of loved it. But I was sold on the show when I saw a picture of the writers’ room and it was almost all youngish women, which just kind of made me assume that they probably had at least one or two queer women. Combine that with everything showrunner tweeted seeming smart and respectful, and the CW generally being very friendly with queer stories, it gave me a confidence that other people who have jobs and no time to stalk twitter and tumblr would not have had.

        That was a really long comment mostly to say that show’s that are primarily written by women are awesome and almost always a step above!

      • Any chance of a standalone recap?

        Karly is killing it, she deserves a chance.

        Karly: I can do your laundry, clean your house, I can make a mean Colombian coffee, whatever you need…

          • I think asking for a Friday recap it’s a bit too much pressure.

            In the meantime I can recommend TV.com recaps, especially the photo recaps because those are really funny. A warning, they ship almost anything, I think the next stop is to ship a rock and tree branch. I don’t know about you, but I can deal with that while I wait for my Boob(s On Your) Tube fix.

        • Please, do a standalone recap. I didn’t dare to ask last week but it just gets better and better and, Karly, you capture it perfectly!

          • What if we started posting Boobs again on Tuesday and Friday and so you could get your 100 fix from Karly on Friday, right after the show? The thing is that Karly is in grad school working her socks off and standalone recaps actually take so so so much time to do and with our limited resources, we can’t pay her what she’s worth right now to spend the time doing them. Would that be a good compromise?

          • Honestly, while I love Karly’s recaps, it’s really the comments section that I wait for. I love being able to discuss the show with all of you. Yeah, I do read recaps elsewhere, (the avclub has had really great The 100 coverage) but Autostraddle is pretty much the only place where I read the comments, and definitely the only place where I have an account and participate in the discussion, and THAT’S my favourite part about the show at the moment. So if Karly doesn’t have time for a full recap right now, that’s totally cool, but maybe we could do like an open thread so we can talk about the show in the comments? Or I supposed I could just start a discussion about The 100 every week in the Friday Open Thread…

          • No problem, but let me ask you, your taste buds still work? Because I do remember both of my trips into grad school, that was a long marathon of crappy coffee that almost killed mine.

        • Awesome idea, thank you, Heather! There are good recaps out there but here at is the best place for great comments and discussion – and my appreciation for Dr. Griffin ;)

        • Boob(s) is coming back to Fridays AND Tuesdays? This is so exciting!

          Will it be just for The 100? Or a full-fledged column like usual?

          (I don’t watch The 100, but my Shondaland shows are coming back this week, and waiting until Tuesday to recap them was going to huuuuuurt.)

          I know how much time TV recapping takes, and you all don’t get the financial rewards that you deserve for the time it really takes. It’s not the same, I know, and it won’t pay your rent- but I promise to ALWAYS comment and ALWAYS show love for the work you do and the community you build!

          Anyway, this was a long ramble to say: Yay! and, Thanks!

  2. I’ve been so excited for this installment of Boob(s on Your) Tube because I finally watched all of The 100!

    And it turns out I love it. I wasn’t sure about it at first because of the overwhelming CWness of it, but it quickly got me addicted even though I would occasionally whisper-shout, “Where the f is Lexa?!” but mostly just because I was tired of Finn. But yes, it’s an excellent show. It’s the most Battlestar Galactica show since Battlestar Galactica. But with the bonus of having a queer lead character!

    Anyway, onto the current stuff. I knew Bellamy’s current girlfriend wasn’t long for this world because she was too cute and sweet and they had no tragic or dramatic beginning to their relationship so obviously that’s not going to fly on this show. I will miss you, Gina. You were real real pretty.

    And that last scene between Clarke and Lexa was perfect. And like you said, very emotional and moving. Yes, it’s all that, but it also gave me many “Lexa as a bottom” fantasies. “I swear fealty to you,” is a pretty amazing line for a sub.

    But now that I’m all caught up and watching the show on a weekly basis, I’m just worried something terrible is going to happen to ruin it all for us.

  3. I am STILL EMOTIONAL after Thursday’s episode of The 100. I actually started crying the moment Lexa dropped to her knees because of this exact romantic sentiment:

    • After being a fan of non-canon femme ships on network TV, or having to follow queer independent media for representation, I don’t think I’ve ever experienced anything so purely romantic that speaks to me and validates my love on TV.

  4. I enjoyed the 100 this week (that scene was amazing) but I am still confused about some basic facts. I thought Lexa exiled Roan but it turns out he’s ice nation?

    And what’s up with the sectors? I don’t remember sectors from last season, but I probably just forgot. I thought the space shil was the only thing with numbered sectors.

    And most of all, why does everyone think Clarke is so strong and that she weakened Lexa’s people? I thought Lexa betrayed her to get her own people out, and got them all out successfully, thus looking strong, and Clarke ended up only saving some people, and at any rate Lexa already had her people out first. So my impression was that Lexa made Clarke look weak. What am I missing?

    Also, who was in Mount Weather when that guy blew it up? And why was Echo trying to get anyone to leave Mount Weather if she is loyal to the ice nation?

    If anyone would mind answering my questions I would be very grateful. Then I can go back to focusing on Clarke and Lexa.

    • I can answer one of your questions! Clarke made Lexa look weak because she stuck around and killed everyone in Mount Weather instead of making a deal with them and retreating.

    • Lexa exiled Roan because Lexa is in charge of the whole coalition of clans, including the ice clans. It’s a loosely allied confederacy with her at the top. So technically the ice queen, Roan’s mom, answers to Lexa. Which is what the Ice Queen is trying to change.

      There are 12 (and now with the arkers 13) clans, they form the coalition that Lexa is in charge of. On the show, we’ve mostly interacted with Triku or the tree clan, which is what Indra and Lincoln are a part of, but Ice Nation is it’s own clan, and the water people that Lincoln and Octavia wanted to go live with are another. What clan Lexa is originally from is unknown I believe.

      People think Lexa looks weak because she took the deal the Mountain Men offered her because she didn’t think they could win in a battle against them. Then Clarke, and about 5 other people, singlehandedly destroyed all the Mountain Men making Lexa look foolish and cowardly for betraying the arkers. Clarke saved all of her people, and killed the Grounders oldest, and considered invincible, enemy almost singlehandedly by mass murdering the entire mountain, Hence the nickname, Commander of Death. Lexa betraying Clarke, and Clarke still successfully winning the battle basically turned Clarke into a mythical superhero and lessened the perception of Lexa’s badassery.

      Half of the farm station had moved into Mount Weather. Echo was trying to distract them and get the military trained people out of Mount Weather so the guy could attack without getting caught.

      • Not quite Prince left the Ice Nation and joined Trikru and it was from them Lexa banished him. If he was banished from the whole Coalition he be way far outta town so to speak. We don’t have any geography or borders mapped out for use so I have no clue how far he’d have to go to be out of Coalition aligned territory. A big ass river like the Mississippi would make an excellent boarder, but who’s to say that’s still even a part of the geography.

    • The sectors thing seems to be a new concept on the show, as a post-Mountain Men world is now divided into sectors as part of the ceasefire between Lexa’s Grounders and the Sky Crew. It seems to be military in nature.

    • Everything makes so much more sense now! Thanks.

      And the ice queen is the one that killed Lexa’s ex, right?

  5. Jesus, that was only the 3rd episode in the season??!!!! I will probably need some heart medication or some other drugs to stay alive for the last episode.

    The best 42 minutes of television I’ve seeing in a very long time.

    PD: Kim Shumway, will you marry me?

    PD2: THAT WAS A WEDDING!!!!!!!!!!

    • Is Kim Shumway queer, by any chance? Because she also wrote the episode where Clarke and Lexa kiss, and DAMN has she been doing our story justice. I know that they have some queer writers/crew members, but don’t remember coming across anything regarding Kim specifically.

      • No idea. The only thing I’m asking in this marriage is that she lets me read her scripts for this show, I don’t care about the rest.

      • I read an AE interview where Jason mentions that Kim was one of the two writers who pitched him Clexa, and she’s written both of the big episodes, so I’d kind of assume she is but it’s not clear. Twitter stalking has only revealed that she is single, so if she is queer someone needs to get on that!

  6. I copy and pasted almost the entire 100 section in preparation for this comment. which is obviously dumb to do now, but I want you to know how awesome it is. I almost just copy-d the whole thing so I could read it again in my own comment. You’re amazing.

  7. I want to draw attention to the lyrical content song the beautiful lady sings

    (from the the twitter of Jason Rothenberg)

    doesn’t it just add to the romance of the fealty swearing?

    Also according to amidola the “Your people are my people.” is straight from the Book of Ruth and sorta maybe regularly said at weddings. I wouldn’t know the Requiem Mass is my specialty, not the Rite of Marriage.

    Lastly a helpful side by Trigedasleng and English lyric video:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iJWFiHcbHzg

    • Amidola is totally right about the Book of Ruth:

      Ruth 1:16: But Ruth said, “Do not urge me to leave you or turn back from following you; for where you go, I will go, and where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God, my God.

      And Ruth 1:17: “Where you die, I will die, and there I will be buried. Thus may the LORD do to me, and worse, if anything but death parts you and me.”

      • YUUUUUP. Frequently used in lesbian weddings ;) The inclusion of that line was definitely NOT a coincidence!

      • Started flapping my hands like a pageant queen reading that. It fits that episode and their relationship like a…hand in a glove. Which when I think about is lesbian for a sword in a sheath.

        Of course when you think about the phrase “take a life with me” it’s not just a way of saying “let’s kill together” but a away of saying “have a life together” in case somebody didn’t see that. And that’s Ruth 1:16-17 and Na Teik Won Sonraun Au being a life together.

        …I see same gender The 100 inspired wedding in the future, maybe not next year but 5-10 years down the road when the baby gays watching this are all grown up.

        • Umm, I’m pretty sure I’m already pinning this speech and aesthetic for whenever I find someone to marry me.

          • I’m sure you’re not alone among us grown.

            I’ve joked for years about dressing up in leathers with braids and carrying the person who wants marry me off on a horse at the end of the ceremony.
            Now I could add a big swooping robe and pauldron to that and my hair is very Grounder style worthy. Just my ability to dutch and french braid is non-existent.

          • Also I am trying to learn that song Trigedasleng so hit me up when you find that someone. I’ll be good for it.

          • In 3 years time, if you get a random message with me asking for elaborate tips on braiding hair and warpaint, you better deliver. I AM HOLDING YOU TO YOUR WORDS, STRADDLERS.

  8. Everyone has already said so many perfect things about The 100 and that Clexa proposal scene, I’m not sure what else I can add. I just am really happy with the queer representation on this show – not just Clexa, but also the throwaway line about Miller’s boyfriend, and Clarke sleeping with Niylah, and just how much of a non-issue it is to Clarke that Lexa is female. They have 99 problems but homophobia ain’t one! And the fact that this is on a CW show primarily aimed at teenagers just makes it all the better.

  9. Uuuugggghhhh I love the 100 SO MUCH! Just keeps getting better. Thank you, Heather, for your thoughtful coverage. Can we play Legos at camp again this year?

  10. I could go on and on about The 100, especially the way Eliza and Alycia’s eye’s communicate more than words could ever do, but I’ll refrain. I will say, I have never had such a visceral reaction to a show as I did this past week. I pretty much had an hour long panic attack. Ok, it was longer than an hour and I had to pop a Xanax to keep from hyperventilating and calm myself enough to attempt sleep. I swear this show on top of my chronic insomnia is going to kill me.
    My little queer heart never imagined it would see a story like this. It’s amazing and hits me with more emotions than my body was built to handle.

  11. This was by far the best episode of The 100 yet. As the show was ending I was already overjoyed about the prospect of an entire episode without that insufferable Jaha/ City of Light storyline (which I’m sure is going somewhere that will eventually become relevant to the larger plot, but for now it’s infuriating), then they hit us with the Clexa scene and I didn’t know what to do. There were so many feelings!! This show is beyond amazing and is everything I’ve ever wanted plus some things I didn’t know I could have, thanks for recapping!

    • You are absolutely right.
      The abscene of Jaha is another blessing of this episode.
      I keep shaking my head and wondering whenever he and his storyline pop up on screen.
      My thought process is literally this:”What on Earth were they thinking?” and “Well, this better be goood, whatever this storyline turns out to be..like, really good.”

  12. So even though I saw the 100 last week it has only just occurred to me that Lexa didn’t need to swear fealty Clarke personally to show that she wouldn’t betray skaikru people again. She could have sworn only to the people, to treat them as her own and made the point just as clearly. But no. She swears her loyalty to one skaikru lady in particular, to look after her (and also btw some people as well). SO GAY.

  13. I loved that ending of The 100 so, so much. I mean, I loved all of their interactions – the ceremony was guh lovely, and before then Clarke /not/ killing Lexa and Lexa’s “I never meant for you to become like this” (or something, paraphrased like woah probably) and she looked all hurt and upset, and etc etc lots of stuff – but then the ending came and just. MY HEART. That was lovely. Obviously they will need some time to get to a good place, but this is certainly a step in the right direction. And Lexa’s eyes and her voice when she swore fealty. GUH. My ship <33333

    (ah, on a non-The 100 related note, has anyone seen The Shannara Chronicles? :D I feel like I need to fangirl about that and recent events soooo yeah ^^)

  14. Sorry for being M.I.A, I just wanted to mention how, when you’re coming out, the thing you struggle with is this feeling of “otherness.”
    Being different, alien.
    Cause what you feel, what you are is so different from the world around you.
    You start reading fanfiction to align the Environment of your day to day with what feels absolutely regular and “normal” in your heart.
    What this episode meant to me, was not only the meeting but the merging of my world of dreams with that of everyone else, for one, precious minute. Or ten.
    A revolution.

  15. I’m boarding this comment train to show my love for The 100 (and that Friday recap anticipation). It’s not just the characters who are in love but everything else. It is so refreshing to see a well written relationship together with an engrossing story line. Episode 4 will be better, the showrunner said.

  16. All of the amazing things have already been said about The 100 and how amazing and beautiful it was, so I just want to say yayyy and I agree!!! Also when the doors opened and Clarke walked in with her grounder get-up on…I’m still trying to pick my jaw up from the floor. Kudos to Jason Rothenberg for his incredible job with building the worlds he has in this show so far and also to the actors/actresses who give us all the warm fuzzies and heart butterflies that they do.

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