Mat, Author at Autostraddle

covid-19

personal essay

a black and white photo of a stethoscope, curled up, on top of a piece of fabric

Seeing the Wind: How It Feels To Be A COVID Nurse

The first time I took care of COVID patients, I felt helpless. I’d lost access to my purpose, to my spiritual practice that lives within deeply connecting to my patients.…

Mat —

Nov 5, 2020

14 Knuckles

disability

a double-image graphic that's cut in half with a red filter over it, so everything is bathed in a red light. on the left side, in negative, the top half of a brown, scorpio femme (the author!) poses in a leopard print slip. she's wearing hoop earrings, has a slightly parted mouth, round glasses frames and has loosely curled hair down to their shoulders. the other side of the image is in positive and shows a mirror image with more detail on the author's face.

love + sex

14 Knuckles: Always A Fistee, Never A Fister

My acceptance of my own pain allows me to have the kind of sex that is rooted in the specificity of my body. I don’t love the idea that I’ll…

Mat —

Sep 30, 2020

14 Knuckles

femmes

mirror image split screen of a femme of color sitting on their knees in a sexy floral robe, hair down, leaning to the right. there's a red treatment over the photo for a little extra erotic style.

love + sex

14 Knuckles: Femme Top Revolution

There’s a difference between domination as a way to take control or claim power over another person — the way certain lovers have done with me — versus domination as…

Mat —

Aug 27, 2020

14 Knuckles

tops and bottoms

a double photo of a long-haired femme from behind, showing off her buttcheeks in a thong-backed body suit and the sides of her cheeks

first person

14 Knuckles: Can Two Switches Have Sex?

Can two switches have sex? I think so, and I think there is something beautifully different about having sex with someone with whom sexual options are truly abundant.

Mat —

Jul 30, 2020

14 Knuckles

tops and bottoms

first person

14 Knuckles: I Want to Buy You A Matte Black Audi

I was always thinking about them — what I’d bring, what I’d wear, what we’d do when we saw each other next. I wanted to dote and caress every moment…

Mat —

Jun 23, 2020

14 Knuckles

first person

14 Knuckles: How Many Knuckles in a Fist

When I teach Rachel how to tie me up and fist me, when I ask her to tell me what to do, when I teach her exactly how I want…

Mat —

May 27, 2020

14 Knuckles

first person

14 Knuckles: The Bad Domme

The thing is: sometimes I like feeling disposable, like I’m just a bunch of holes that someone else is using for their pleasure. I know I’m fucking powerful, so sometimes…

Mat —

Apr 27, 2020

the speakeasy

first person

Lesbian Meme Culture Normalized My Abusive Relationship

Once I was out of an emotionally and sexually abusive queer relationship, I realized how lesbian memes can support unhealthy relationship dynamics. U-hauling and codependency didn’t feel like a joke…

Mat —

Mar 18, 2020

the outsiders issue

issues

Unlikely Hikers: Creating Space For Everyone On The Trail, One Group Hike At A Time

“I can’t explain how unreal it felt to be able to let my guard down with a big group of strangers on a hike.”

Mat —

May 1, 2019

bicycles

personal essay

first person

Food and Water, Silence and Solitude: The Bike Trip That Returned Me to Myself

In 2014, after learning how to care for a person on the edge between life and death, I went on the bike ride that would, ultimately, return me to myself.

Mat —

Oct 16, 2018

bicycles

fullscreen

first person

Bicycling Across India, Learning About Queerness and Intimacy Along the Way

Lying in bed, she asked why I thought she’d be into women, and I tried to explain that Indian norms are full of moments Americans consider to be flirting. “Holding…

Mat —

Jun 14, 2018

Mat

Most Popular Articles by Author

Recent AF+ Articles by This Author

All Articles by this Author on Autostraddle

Seeing the Wind: How It Feels To Be A COVID Nurse

14 Knuckles: Always A Fistee, Never A Fister

14 Knuckles: Femme Top Revolution

14 Knuckles: Can Two Switches Have Sex?

14 Knuckles: I Want to Buy You A Matte Black Audi

14 Knuckles: How Many Knuckles in a Fist

14 Knuckles: The Bad Domme

Lesbian Meme Culture Normalized My Abusive Relationship

Unlikely Hikers: Creating Space For Everyone On The Trail, One Group Hike At A Time

Food and Water, Silence and Solitude: The Bike Trip That Returned Me to Myself

Bicycling Across India, Learning About Queerness and Intimacy Along the Way