Lip Service Episode 105 Recap: Like a Strap-On Without the Strap
Hi! Welcome to the Lip Service Episode 105 recap, which I turned in about five days late. Just in time for the next episode to air! Some of these screencaps are from the Lip Service Fansite. Big up to those ladies. OKAY LET’S GET STARTED WE’RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME!
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Heyyy Good morning Frankie!
Frankie is always Tumblr-Ready
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Last night, in case you don’t remember after all that coke and booze, you slept with Jay, and Tess saw. Before getting out of her bed and sitting on its edge in her standard thinking-hard-about-my-life pose, Frankie takes some time to flick through some photos on her camera, which is a great way to remember what happened when you don’t remember what happened. Frankie sees a picture of Jay and um, remembers what happened. I hope she doesn’t get preggers, you know how men are.
O-O-O-KLAHOMA WHERE THE WIND COMES RUSHING DOWN THE SOMETHING!
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And, in the age old tradition of this show, we are showed some early morning cunnilingus within the first 30 seconds, followed by Sam telling Cat that she loves her and Cat telling Sam that she has to go to work, which is slightly off topic.
This Almost Looks Like Dana Fairbanks Kissing Jill Bennett
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So there you go. Sam loves Cat, and Cat likes that Sam loves her. At least Cat didn’t respond: “I think I could fall in love with you.”
So, Ed wrote an alien book about his unrequited love for Tess and Tess doesn’t realize it’s about her because she’s distracted by her fit neighbor — you know, the one who so far has no dialogue and is the only butch and/or woman of color on the show. Do you want to know how butch she is? She’ s an electrician, and she drives a truck! (Hot right)
I See You Baby. Shaking that Ass.
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When Tess asks Frankie about her romp in the hay with Jay, Frankie delivers possibly the best line of the season, re: “having sex with a dude”
“What? It’s just like a strap-on without a strap!”
Tess tells Ed who promises not to tell anyone which means he will. Meanwhile Frankie and Jay have a pissing contest over who can be the bigger morning-after asshole and agree to pretend it never happened.
In happier news, Tess’s 30th birthday is coming up! In addition to the cowboys-and-indians themed surprise party he’s throwing together, Ed has made her a present to add to the towering pile of glaringly obvious evidence of his glaringly obvious love for her:
This is the picture I picked out for January, just wait til you see JUNE!….
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Tess: Look at your pasty little chest.
Cat & Frankie snag a suspiciously convenient Important Architectural Assignment, which involves taking photos of their old high school so it can be converted into condos like Melrose Place.
Remember That Time You Said You Were a Falcon and Jumped off the Roof? That was Weird
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They’re getting increasingly flirty with each other as the writers try to convince us that they were actually once a bona fide couple with chemistry (they’re actually mildly successful with this), resulting in lyrical gems such as:
Frankie: I remember it being even bigger than this.
Cat: I think we were just smaller. Well, I was.
Frankie: I remember you being pretty well developed.
So now we get it — Frankie is the hot bad girl, and Cat is the good girl, and together they probably have really important sex.
Smize For Me Baby
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They scope out the places where they used to perv on each other from afar, where they met in detention and carved their initials into a door frame, and amidst all the distraction of the nostalgic montage where Frankie takes photos of Cat in hallways with the happy guitar music, they forget to put out a cigarette and properly smoke out an old classroom.
Remember the time the nuns told us we were all going to hell?
I Used to Have a Life Once
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Tess is trying to get her life on track in time for her thirtieth and Ed is getting a big Literary Contract. This is highly upsetting for Tess because she wants to Make It Big, too, so she lies about having a gazillion auditions.
The Alley of Our Discontent
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Sadie’s unimpressed with Frankie because when a girl gets high in the bath with you and then lets you watch her shave, that means forever. It’s like diamonds. But Frankie doesn’t invite Sadie in, so Sadie is sad. Also Sadie is getting progressively more good-looking, has anybody noticed that.
Rear-View Mirror Symbolism
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Cat is having relationship issues with Sam ’cause Sam said I love you and Cat did not say it back. As Sam explains to her police partner while they’ re staking out a factory and doing other important police work:
“ Saying ‘ I love you’ is like a gun fight. If you draw first, you better not miss.”
Got that? Got it.
another scene where frankie doesn’t make out with anyone
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In the land of family issues, Frankie follows the trail left by key chains and boxing gyms to a purdy little suburban block of flats, where the boy from the estate with the marijuana lives. Her uncle is there and he’ s angry, apparently about marijuana boy getting high with Frankie and Jay that one time. It’s a mystery, but maybe there’ s a connection to Frankie’ s past. “Who am I?” she thinks. “Am I Francesca? Am I Shane? Am I really really really good looking?” Really you can see the wheels turning in her brain, she’s thinking really hard.
Remember that incident with Jay and the Hot Intern and the ketamine in the bathroom? The big angry homophobic boss is giving Cat a hard time about it, and now she’ s gone and set a building on fire. Frankie sees her chance to get in Cat’ s good books/vaginal canal and ends up taking responsibility for everything, including the high intern. Such a Shaney move. She gets fired, obvs, and Cat looks good now b/c she warned her boss about Frankie.
Speaking of fire, Tess manages to lure the butchy electrician into her apartment on the premise of having blown a fuse of some sort. This seems like an ill-fated plan.
Yeah I think i have a spark plug up my vadge if you could fix it for me?
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And yes, just as our Lesbelectrician gets into the apartment, Tess’s ex-girlfriend Chloe calls and Lesbelectrician picks up.
I’m K-K-Kinda Busy
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Remember Chloe? She’s the Gabby Devoux of Lip Service and in the first episode she was giving her girlfriend head while Ed and Tess hid under the bed? Yeah she has big news for Tess, it’s heads-or-tails at this point if it’s going to be an engagement, a wedding, or a baby, or all three. And the potential New Girlfriend is outta there because ex-girlfriends are like anthrax.
It’s Friday, Tess’s birthday! THE BIG 3-0! LOOK AT THIS HAPPY FACE!
I wish there was an Autostraddle Meet-up in Glasgow so i could meet a new girlfriend
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The special day has arrived! All of her friends have cleverly invented tales of work, concert tickets, etc., to convince her that nothing, absolutely NOTHING is happening on her birthday, not a cake, not some drinks, not a flat full of cowgirls and sexy Pocahontases, just a lonely thirty-year-old on her way to see her ex-girlfriend.
This would be a good moment to say “BUT I SLEPT WITH A TV STAR!”
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Chloe doesn’t want to say happy birthday or anything, no, she just wants to flash her big fat engagement ring in Tess’ s face and recommend botox.
This is definitely the worst birthday in a while, but it gets worse. On top of the engaged ex, the turning thirty sans friends and the non-starter acting career, Tess decides to get some birthday botox and gets a teeny lil’ reaction to it which makes her face swell up so she looks like she’s taken a beating. Ouch.
Dirty Thirty
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Ed chases down a teary, bruisy-eyed Tess and at the sight of her being upset and vulnerable, is overwhelmed with the need to express his unbridled, heterosexual love for her. He’s inspired by Frankie’s sexual fluidity.
Ed: I love you.
Tess: Aw, I love you too, Ed.
Ed: No, no. I love you like a man loves a woman.
Coincidentally, Tess wrote off being loved by a man like a man loves a woman about fifteen years ago. She takes this badly, because she’ s very emotional and now she thinks that the only reason Ed is friends with her is because he wants to get into her pants, and her pants are homosexual pants, and so she runs off towards home.
You know, home. Currently occupied by a lot of dressed-up, liquored-up gay people. Frankie is ostentatiously snogging Sadie, interspersed with dark, brooding looks in Cat’ s direction.
Cat looks supercute, and Sam makes a rather sexy sheriff.
Howdy.
Little do they know everything is about to go, horribly, horribly awry, or as they say in Glasgow, tits up. Becky struts right up to Frankie and asks if Sadie is the one who stole her necklace way back when. She throws in some gratuitous snark about how Cat is taken now which is interrupted by Ed calling to say Tess is on her way, though he leaves out that she’s in a really terrible mood.
SURPRISE YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE TO DO A LOT OF DISHES TOMORROW
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They do the whole “SURPRISE!!” thing anyway, which sends Tess scurrying to her room to lie on her bed and lock the door, Angela Chase style. Ed rushes in after her and declares that he has declared his love. Then disaster strikes:
Jay: No wonder you never pull. You do realize she’ s gay?
Ed: Didn’t stop you with Frankie, did it?
Becky: Is that where you were the other night?
Hi I’m the Other Straight Guy On This Show
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Becky is understandably upset/done. But so is Cat, who shoots Frankie a sad look across the room, like the look Carmen gave Shane when she brought home those two blondes. What a floozy.
But They Already Put You on the Cast Poster, There’s No Backing Out Now
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Sadie’s no fool either ’cause she knows Frankie wants Cat, not her, so she pushes Frankie away from her and eventually leaves in tears.
Cat goes home with Sam to finally say “I love you” back, but in a way that we can tell is insincere. Not the best circumstances really.
I Won’t Be Left Dancing Alone To Songs From the Past
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So, to sum up, Jay and Becky are breaking up, Frankie broke Cat’ s and Sadie’ s hearts, Tess is crying in her room and hates Ed, Becky hates Frankie, Jay hates Ed, Sam still deeply dislikes Frankie. Basically every character is crying or seriously pissed off just in time for the last episode! See you next week folks I MEAN TOMORROW BECAUSE I TURNED IN THIS RECAP SO LATE.
Next Week:
Lip Service Episode 103 Recap: Everybody Must Get F*cked (Up)
In the last episode, we had the pleasure of experiencing Frankie strapping on and getting robbed, Lou going down on Tess (in more than one way, that was exciting), and Sam finally seducing Cat. Basically everyone had sex, which made it SO much more rewarding than, say, Season 3 of the L Word, when nobody had sex and somebody died.
It’s promising! Let’s proceed, dear readers.
One scene in and we’re already getting into the heavy moaning — Tess & Lou make a ruckus, Cat and Sam giggle and Cat freaks out about one of those Important Big Work Presentations.
Oh is THAT what women with actual sexual chemistry together sound like
You know, the kind people always have in teevee shows which address the Pressing Dilemnas of Women who must Balance Emotions and still Perform on the Job. It’s a guaranteed hijinkfest and GUESS WHO’S LATE FOR THE BIG WORK PRESENTATION? It’s Jay! He’s the straight guy on the show who you wish wasn’t on the show, and he can sense that you don’t like him and so he sort of took his time.+
No actually it’s ’cause Jay & Becky are having relationship issues ’cause you know, his friend Frankie brought home a girl for a one-night stand who then stole Becky’s necklace. Also, Frankie has been peer-pressuring Jay into going out all the time, therefore making him slack at work.
When I look at you like this, you do what i want. Kapeesh?
The Presentation goes well though, and the Architecture Agency ends up with a new client (important later). Oh and guess who just got a job at Cat’s Architecture Agency?
Yes, Frankie’s lust for Cat is so great that she does what any obnoxious lesbian stalker would do and decides to a) take a job as a photographer at Cat’s architecture business, and b) convince Tess to move out of Cat’s and in with her, just for the extra attention. Look at me!
AND WHATEVER GIRLS I DISCARD, YOU CAN HAVE THEM FOR YOURSELF?
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This obviously does not please Cat very much, especially when she has to go on a photoshoot with Frankie. However, continuing in the vein of last week’s giving of The Attitude, Cat is taking no shit and lays down the smack when Frankie tries to get all flirty. (Look at me!) Attagirl. When she finds out about Tess moving in with her, however, her cool is somewhat blown. At least it is to the extent that she can’t concentrate on sexytime with Sam, which is a shame, because their only sex scene so far has been rather tame and we’d like to see some real action, although I’m not sure real action is Cat’s kind of thing.
Straddling Way Outside Of What Your Pride Will AllowCat+
Cat then talks about Frankie while making out with Sam. like A LOT. Like beyond anything that is reasonably acceptable in any universe besides the one on television.
Anyhow moving on to Tess & Lou…
After Shopping for Wristbands at Claire’s, the Happy Couple Headed Over to The Peach Pit for Soda
Tess & Lou are trailblazing their cute asses all the way to a GAY BAR and although Lou’s freaking out about all the womyn, she takes a big step by planting an over-the-table kiss on Tess, which is not only physically awkward but metaphorically significant.
Lou promises they’ll hang out later and then Tess engages in excited I’m-gonna-get-laid-tonight preparation whilst wearing lingerie and adjusting her boobs.
They’ll be like ‘HELLO!’
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Obviously she’s getting ready to get stood up. Again. This time Lou doesn’t even call. The next day, Tess and Ed are temping together at an unidentified company which seems to facilitate phone calls, display charts and, unfortunately, employ an ex-classmate of Tess’s who Tess made fun of in high school. Nothing like being underemployed and under-loved. Even in this nightmare scenario, Lou STILL doesn’t call.
Anyhow, Frankie’s having “thoughts” about her Family and Past. These thoughts do not involve Naked Girls or Smoldering Looks, shouldn’t they save the “family backstory storyline” for Season Three, you know, the season with the no-sex and death and stuff. Anyhow.
Frankie peer pressures Jay to accompany her on a voyage to the estate she visited last episode. They get inside by swinging the “let’s get high together” trick on the unsuspecting squatter currently inhabiting the place. Frankie has some memories about the apartment they’re in mostly based on the texture of the wallpaper. But also… she’s high.
THE YELLOW WALLPAPER
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Back at The Office, Cat decides that Frankie hanging around is just too much to bear, so she decides to have a calm chat with her boss about it which eventually leads to coming out, as all women without Alternative Lifestyle Haircuts must do one day in their lives.
His reaction is hard to read but not really hard to read because we can tell this is going to be an issue, and the air is thick with imminent Homophobic Discrimination in the Workplace. And whaddya now, she’s getting pulled off the Important Architectural Project that she just won in that meeting, and Jay is getting it even for Jay was late for the meeting, remember? Ruh-roh.
Meanwhile, Frankie is sitting on the edge of her bed, contemplating the cruel, enigmatic world beyond her Shane Haircut bangs. (Recurrent theme!) She decides that what is needed is a thorough clean up of her room, and in the process discovers Sadie the real estate agent/thief/Robin Hood’s business card!
Cunningly, she books an appointment to see an apartment, so that 1) Sadie turns up unawares…
I’m a Good Kisser and You’re a Fast Learner and that kinda thing could float us for a pretty long time…
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… and 2) they can then have sex on the kitchen floor of said apartment in various interesting camera angles. Lucky for her, her ingenious plans leads to both results! Oh, and she also gets her stolen stuff back, I guess.
Like in Spiderman
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Like in Batman
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Again at The Office, Jay and Frankie have their eye on the Pretty Young Intern and Jay is sick of being in the doghouse so he invites Pretty Young Intern into the bathroom to enjoy a little makeout session and a line or two of coke.
I’m Gonna Make This One-Episode Guest Gig Count if It Kills Me With One Line of Coke
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After which she promptly almost dies, which is confusing because it was just one line of coke OH WAIT it’s not actually coke, it’s [either a Scottish drug that I don’t and can’t know about (unlikely) or a completely mainstream drug that I don’t know about because I am a square and/or underinformed (highly likely). Chem? Kem? Cam? I dunno.].
Anyhow, he’s due back at work and his makeout buddy is floor-bound, so he calls in Frankie, who takes her Shane Bangs and Shane Eyeliner and Shane Drug-Abuse Awareness into the stall, scoops up the girl, and takes her home. You know how actresses are. I don’t know why, but somehow I just KNEW this wasn’t going to end well.
yeah that’s right i got a girl passed out on my shoulder, yeah my ring is gigantic, who the hell are you
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At Rubies/The Planet, Cat still won’t stop talking about work and stuff, although admittedly, her boss seems to be a bigot and her ex is in all up in her grill. Ultimately though, Sam is annoyed because she’s a cop and that is imaginably more stressful than being an architect.
Cat has to follow her all the way to the police station to apologise, and the situation devolves into some cop/interrogation role play lite involving cunnilingus on the desk. Because for Chrissake if all these women are going to do is argue, they might as well get some good fucking out of it.
I Plead the Fifth Finger
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Tess finally receives a text from Lou, which is not very informative but prompts her to throw on some lingerie and get Ed to drive her to Lou’s so she can surprise her/score WHICH IS OBVIOUSLY NOT GOING TO END WELL. Because why would the cameras follow Tess all the way here just to watch them make out.
Yeah… who should she see wandering canoodlingly towards Lou’s apartment? Lou and Tom, her famous co-presenter and married ex who Tess and she originally bonded over disliking. Oh, I did NOT SEE THAT COMING. Sidenote, he’s gross!
Lou: Tess, what are you doing here?
Tess: I came to see if you were okay.
Tom: I didn’t think we’d be seeing you again in a hurry.
Tess: Why? Because I’m just one big f–king joke to you? [Looks towards Lou] Is that it?
Obviously Tess is v upset, and Ed – bless his soul! – decides that the only way to resolve the situation, really, is to punch Tom in the nose. No, but seriously, people, violence is never the answer. Don’t punch the married boyfriend of your gay friend’s would-be-girlfriend, please.
AND THEN WE HAVE A MOMENT. You know this moment, it happened with Nikki & Jenny in Season Five, when the ingenue returns to her true love and cries about how hard it is to be with her b/c of her career and that terrible terrible man she has to sleep with to keep it going and OH IF LIFE WAS ONLY UNICORNS AND ORAL SEX FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER
Love Means Saying You’re Sorry Right Now Plz
Next, Frankie picks up Sadie for a drink, and as they are walking side by side in their matching lesbian leather jackets, Frankie spies Cat and Sam walking along looking all couple-y and happy and snogging each other’s faces off and has to take a moment to drown Sadie out so that we all understand that Frankie’s feelings for Cat are Real. Maybe it was a Shane-and-Carmen- and/or Molly-esque situation that led Frankie to leave Cat? She was certain she was going to cheat and convinced that Cat was too good for her? I’m sure we’ll find out more soon, but for now, know that what’s going on is megadeep. FRANKIE STILL LOVES CAT, write that down. WHY ARE THEY OR WERE THEY EVER TOGETHR? We have no idea. Write down a question mark.
I Feel The Knife Going In
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Tess gets some sympathy at Rubies, and there are drinks and the assertive but gentle suggestion the she sell Lou out to the tabloids (Sadie’s idea). Maybe that’s the better way to deal with this kind of thing. Jay and Becky are also reconciled now, which Frankie is a bit skeptical about (maybe she also has deep feelings for him, idk).
Tess wakes up to find news of Lou and Tom’s affair plastered all over the taboids, which we can probs blame on Sadie. Does it serve Lou right? Discuss.
Frankie goes to the Official Bureau of Unsolved Family Mysteries to discover that when her parents died in that car crash many years ago, a three-year-old named Francesca Alan also died. OMG THAT’S FRANKIE’S NAME. I know, right? This must be what her aunt meant to tell her before she died and everything! Frankie is at least as upset as you about this, she’s having a wee moment of hyperventilation on the street. Because if she died when she was three years old, did she really fuck all those girls, or was that all ghostsex? Ghostsex is a thing. It happens. We have a ghost pumpkin.
SO THAT’S WHY I’M SO IMMATURE!
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AND THAT’S A WRAP!
How are you feeling about this? We would like to hear your opinions, hope and dreams regarding Lip Service, especially now that we’re getting properly in to the roll of things!
‘Lip Service’ Recap Episode 101: Lesbian TV Show is Pretty Good, Sexy, Comes with a New Shane
BBC3’s new lesbian drama Lip Service began its scandalous run on the BBC3 with nearly 600,000 viewers on Tuesday, Oct. 12, and then it got like 10 million complaint letters ’cause two chicks have sex around dead people. Idk, it happens. We’ll get there.
Fans of The L Word (the good seasons, anyway) will be happy to know two things about Lip Service (aka The L Word If Everyone Talked Like Helena Peabody), BBC3’s new drama about the lives of three lesbian/bisexual women in Glasgow:
1. The theme song doesn’t have lyrics. And it certainly doesn’t suffer from gerund overdose. It does, however, have harmonicas.
2. As Riese previously stated: attention Autostraddlers, we have a Scottish Shane.
Meet Ruta Gedmintas, a.k.a. broody Bisexual Gal With A Camera™ protagonist Frankie, who will now proceed to lead a whole new generation of straight British girls to further ponder their sexuality.
Completing the entourage are:
+Frankie’s ex-girlfriend Cat (Laura Fraser), a meticulous, control-freak architect with a Selma-Blair-circa-Legally-Blonde vibe and just the cutest accent ever.
+Tess (Fiona Button), a struggling actress also getting over a nasty breakup.
+ Ed (James Antony Pearson), Cat’s brother and Tess’ constant companion who totally has an unrequited crush on her and it’s kind of cute but also sad.
+ Jay (Emun Elliot), Cat’s coworker and Frankie’s close friend who serves as the glue that holds the group together and is probably the most sex-obsessed of the group (his new girlfriend, Becky, makes an appearance).
Now, let’s get into it.
We open in New York where Shane/Frankie’s working her camera magic on a sultry (supposedly straight AND ENGAGED, LOL) American model with all the charisma of an actress. That being said she brings a whole new meaning to “the camera loves you.”
Within two minutes they start having sex and instantly this show becomes totally amazing.
Frankie interrupts the makeout for an apparently INSANELY URGENT phone call. Her aunt, who raised her after her parents died, has now died. She returns to the makeout.
Let’s refresh — THIS IS THE OPENING SCENE. There is no ovulation here, or if there is we don’t have to hear about it.
Holy Lezbeth Salandar, Batman.
I think what we’re supposed to take away from this is that Frankie uses sex as an anesthetic for her emotional pain and insecurities. You know, like Shane. Everyone got that? Good. We liked it the first time (Brian Kinney) and the second time (Shane), so I suspect we’ll like it the third time (Frankie).
Cut to an apartment which a photographer in New York could never afford, seemingly inhabited and rented by a photographer in New York named Frankie. She’s creeping her exes on Facebook (important lesbian/human cultural reference #1), but the best part is her status, which reads something along the lines of “Frankie thinks Bella should have ditched Edward and…” Team Bella knows no borders, friends.
Stalkage is interrupted by a voicemail from, you guessed it, her now deceased aunt, telling “Francesca” that she has something she wants to tell her, but all we heard was, “Jenny. This is Marina. I can’t stop thinking about you.” JK that would be gross. But also, like, really.
In Glasgow, Frankie’s getting checked out by passing business-y looking Scottish women the second she steps off the plane, and has a look on her face that says, “I still got it. I’m Shane, motherfuckers.”
Frankie gets shuttled away from the airport by Jay, her straight dude friend, and then we meet Frankie’s ex Cat, who, in the midst of Important Architectural Work, receives a message from someone named Sam on GaydarGirls, asking her out for drinks. Just as we think we’re going to get more details, roommate Tess barges in with — what else, y’all? — SERIOUS EX DRAMZ.
Tess: This is Chloe’s Facebook picture, and this is a picture I took of her at your birthday party. One and the same!
Cat: Tess, I just need to…
Tess: She dumps me, and then the bitch has the audacity to use a sexy photo I took of her as her Facebook picture! I mean, is it just me, or is that criminal?
Tess convinces Cat to go on a date with the Gaydar Girl because it’s been two years since her breakup with Frankie which means it’s ‘moving on’ time. But now Tess needs a dress for her date that she left at Chloe’s when they de-U-Hauled.
Unsurprisingly, Ed and Tess end up hiding underneath the bed when Chloe returns home with her new lover, dashing in for a little afternoon delight. Obviously Tess goes on to blow her audition for face cream.
awk.
Meanwhile, on the other side of the Sea of Terrible Ex-Girlfriend Demons We Haven’t Had Time to Develop ‘Cause It’s the First Episode, Frankie is wandering around the alley outside like the Diet Coke guy/Melissa Etheridge, and Cat eventually comes down from her window to be steely in the face of Frankie’s Aura.
It’s tense in that way that you know it’ll get a little tenser later.
At The Planet/Rubies, we see the entourage in action doing the things that entourages do: talking about trampling all over ex-girlfriends, talking about relationships past (Frankie persuaded Cat to leave her girlfriend and then shit got real). There’s a boy there and he has a girlfriend, we don’t care, and later he has a heart-to-heart with Frankie in front of everybody about taming his man-beast, which Frankie clearly has an interest in as well. Shots for everyone!
Cat’s Cop Date is that difficult to read type who always seems like they’re totally judging you and it makes you nervous and ramble and eventually, um, you know, talking about your ex-girlfriend a lot.
It’s still remarkably confusing how Cat and Frankie were ever together, which might be one of the show’s most interesting aspects so far.
The next day, Ed and Tess are just hangin’ out, dressed like kiwi soda cans, because they’re unemployed and broke and will do just about anything for cash. Aren’t we all.
Then they start talking about Ed’s grandparents’ sex life and eventually Tess has another moment where she could be Alice talking about her post-Gabby Devoux life, or she could be a new character altogether. Hard to tell.
The conversation switches to “über-babe” TV anchor Lou Foster, a very “straight-looking” brunette with strong Jenny Schecter-potential. Right down to that bow.
Tess walks in on Lou Foster crying in the bathroom, who has just been dumped by her (MARRIED!) boyfriend. Tess consoles her and we imagine will bring her over to the gay side soon enough.
At the funeral home we get more insight into Frankie’s damaged soul as she softly caresses the CORPSE of her dead aunt, where she is interrupted by her family, who hates her probs for being a homogay. Eventually there’s a heated argument, Frankie wants to know what her aunt wanted to tell her (re: voicemail), and Frankie ends up crying in a bathroom stall. It’s really sad because it’s always sadder when Shane cries.
It’s Cat to the rescue, and the first real attempt at reconciliation leads to another important lesbian cultural reference: the use of weed-related nostalgia (specifically, the first time they got stoned together and ate all of Frankie’s uncle’s posh biscuits, because sometimes, you do that).
Frankie turns the attempt at reconciliation into a makeout attempt (classic mistake). Cat freaks out. End poignant moment, leaving Frankie looking adorably confused/pained.
In another happier place, Tess and Lou are experiencing the burning fire of straight girl conversion at a bar and then take that lust to Lou’s super-swanky apartment over glasses of wine. Lou has these um, robots, and Tess really likes them, because she is the most adorable geek ever.
Lou has always wanted to kiss a woman, and now it’s starting time for that which is neat, but not as neat as what happens next when Cat goes to visit Frankie at the funeral parlor and heads down to the morgue where Frankie is fucking a random girl with a force and velocity that suggests fisting, a Papi’s Circles-Esque technique, and/or extreme dexterity despite the presence of a zip-fly and underpants and all that other shit. Or just an oddly choreographed sex scene.
Also, are they having sex or is Frankie trying to saw her leg off?
Cat stands there in horror and disbelief and runs out, the corpse doesn’t notice because the corpse is dead, and the funeral home receptionist doesn’t notice because Frankie’s hand is probably in her ovaries.
Upon finishing, Frankie gets this weird “what have I done”/”I must be seriously fucked up”/”I wish I was dead” look on her face and throws on her jacket.
Panting receptionist lady asks for Frankie’s number, like, “But, I mean, you’re the kind of girl who hooks up with strangers in mortuaries. How do I contact you?” but Frankie says that the girl doesn’t want it. Okay, neat. But Frankie’s gone, and on her way out she doesn’t see Cat, who is standing on the side of the street, bawling her pretty eyes out.
[/feelings]
And, before signing off, here’s the episode by the numbers:
+ Number of times someone cries in a bathroom: 2
+ Number of times Frankie has sex with someone up against a wall: 2
+ Number of times the term “Lezurrection” is used: 1
+ Number of shots taken during the obligatory bar scene: Don’t know, but I want some.
SO WHAT DO YOU THINK OF LIP SERVICE? Is it the new L Word, is it too much like The L Word, is it worse/better than you expected, do you care about these people, do you care about anything, just talk to me now.