Vanessa

Community Editor

Vanessa is a writer, a teacher, and the community editor at Autostraddle. Very hot, very fun, very weird. Find her on twitter and instagram.

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Recent AF+ Articles by This Author

four abstractly illustrated figures engage in a celebratory kinky dance. from left to right we have someone with top surgery scars wearing assless chaps, connected bvia a pair of cuffs to a person who is blindfolded and wearing cut out underwear, who is dancing next to someone in a mask and what appears to abe a full body rope bind, and followed by a person in a fishnet, corset and ballgag waving a flogger above their head. The figures are featureless and hairless and purple and the kink elements are red

How to Find Local Kink Community and Also How to Hire a Sex Worker

Af+

Vanessa

Vanessa and PB pose in front of a pool in bathing suits, wearing sunglasses. Vanessa's sunglasses are red and heart-shaped. PB's are clear with greenish lenses. PB is white and has blonde hair that is long on top and under a hat with a swoop of bangs visible and with shaved sides. Vanessa is also white with long brown hair she is wearing up.

Things I’ve Never Asked My Girlfriend About Wildflowers, Baby Names and Time Travel

Af+

Vanessa

A person with green skin and long pink hair looks off to the side with their arms folded against a black background. Two people behind them (a person with purple skin and blue hair and a person with blue skin and purple hair) touch their foreheads together.

S L I C K: How to Fuck Your Friends

Af+

Vanessa

A fat queer femme lays down in the darkness, her arm extended to snap a selfie with her phone, which streams down a surreal glow over her face. Her hand cups the back of her head which has long, wavy blue hair.

S L I C K: Hank & Melanie

Love + Sex

Vanessa

All Articles by this Author on Autostraddle

NSFW

Queer Erotica

A person with green skin and long pink hair looks off to the side with their arms folded against a black background. Two people behind them (a person with purple skin and blue hair and a person with blue skin and purple hair) touch their foreheads together.

af+

S L I C K: How to Fuck Your Friends

A narrator’s crush on one partnered babe turns into a threesome. “They bite hard on your nipples, you’re all soaking wet, you tell each other, it’s not weird, it’s just…

Vanessa —

Nov 11, 2021

advice

you need help

a lonely woman sits with her head between her knees by a beautiful lake

dating

You Need Help: I’ve Never Had a Date and I’m So Lonely

The bad news is the answer to loneliness is not necessarily found on dating apps. The good news is you can meet people other ways.

Vanessa —

Nov 9, 2021

advice

you need help

a queer couple sits at a coffee shop holding hands and having a serious conversation

relationships

You Need Help: I Don’t Want Kids But My Partner Might, Does This Mean We Can’t Get Married?

Our present selves can’t make promises for our future selves. Your partner is telling you what she knows about herself today. Is that enough?

Vanessa —

Nov 2, 2021

An empty classroom, which includes wooden desks, a green chalkboard, a clock and a podium at the front of the room.

first person

Well, That’s Mortifying: That Time I Didn’t Know About Roger Clemens

The class erupted in wide-eyed giggles and guffaws and I continued smiling at the front of the room, confident and certain that I’d made a very smooth move.

Vanessa —

Oct 16, 2021

autostraddle fundraising

straddleverse

I Almost Didn’t Write It

I don’t want to write about it for any other publication. I barely want to write about it for myself.

Vanessa —

Oct 13, 2021

BLANK with my grief

death is sad

three stacked journals: the top and bottom journals are black and the middle journal is grey with the words The Grief Journal on the spine

first person

Journaling With My Grief

I have three journals. I no longer have my dad. I’ll write this story for the rest of my life.

Vanessa —

Sep 25, 2021

BLANK with my grief

death is sad

A white woman lies on the floor on a pink velvet blanket. Her face is not entirely visible, you can only see her mouth and her chin, and four candles are in the foreground

first person

Lying On The Floor With My Grief

I wanted to exist with my grief in my body, not so much in my mind.

Vanessa —

Sep 18, 2021

BLANK with my grief

death is sad

railroad tracks trailing off into the distance, with beautiful tall green trees on either side

first person

Walking With My Grief

My grief says, listen: you know how to take care of yourself.

Vanessa —

Sep 11, 2021

BLANK with my grief

death is sad

a breakfast spread including a bagel with scrambled eggs on a floral print plate, a mason jar full of water, a cup of tea, a cute plant, and a green and white striped napkin all set on a wood table

first person

Eating Breakfast With My Grief

I decided to start sitting with my grief because why not. It’s not like I think this will help, but it’s something to do.

Vanessa —

Sep 4, 2021

advice

you need help

frustrated woman is deciding if she should break up with her annoying girlfriend, she has dark curly hair clutches her head while making a pained expression

breakups

You Need Help: My Girlfriend is So Annoying, Should I Break Up With Her?

Your feelings about her are a great big neon sign spelling out the word B R E A K U P.

Vanessa —

Aug 31, 2021

death is sad

personal essay

a black Subaru is parked on an open road with a blue sky with perfect white clouds above it

first person

I Spent the Summer Screaming in My Car, What About You?

When the sound of a scream leaves my throat, it is a choice. I am never accidentally screaming. I scream in the car and it is on purpose.

Vanessa —

Aug 24, 2021

fullscreen

photography

three autostraddle readers featured in the gallery: Dee, Laura, and Beck

lgbt pride

Queer IRL: Autostraddle’s 2021 Pride Gallery!

“I am SO THANKFUL to be vaccinated and alive and gay as fuck.”

Vanessa —

Jun 30, 2021