What’s going on beanie babes! Here’s hoping that you catch up on all of your emails, swiftly create all of your collages, format every post, fold and put away that laundry, and that laundry, file your taxes, paint your nails, make that hair appointment, kiss your girl, organize your planner, dye those eggs, boil them first, do the yoga, soak your air plants and get some sleep this weekend. Or, you know, whatever it is you deeply need/want to do. Yay life!
Queer as in F*ck You
+ Lesbian Asylum Seeker Told to Prove She’s Gay by Handing Over Naked Pictures.
+ Gabby Rivera is awesome, Juliet Takes a Breath is awesome, and now everybody’s gonna know it.
+ Julien Baker is Christian and Queer, Get Over It.
+ Gaycation Heads Home for Some Introspection in Season One Finale.
+ Gay, Lesbian, and Transgender Republicans Struggle With Their Choices, as do I tbh.
+ The NBA is Deeply Concerned About North Carolina’s Bullshit Fuckery.
+ Who Birthed the Anti-Trans Bathroom Panic?
+ Try some of these Non-Coffee-Related First Dates why don’t you!
Doll Parts
+ How Higher Education Lets Women Down.
+ Study Shows Women and Minorities Are Punished for Speaking Up About Workplace Diversity. Hm.
+ One of Hollywood’s First Female Execs on Competition, Beauty, and Fighting Sexism.
+ The Untold Stories of Black Girls.
+ What Happened When I Went Undercover at an Anti-Abortion Conference. This is kind of my dream assignment? Because I guess I hate having low/normal blood pressure or something?
+ This perfect roundup of Feminist Knitting Patterns is, in a fucking word, perfect.
+ Hey did you want to think about body hair for a few minutes? Happy trails! I used to bleach my stomach hair in high school with a box of Sally Hansen hair bleach, which burned like hell and left me blotchy and raw. Then I would actually pray to a god I didn’t even believe in and make promises like “Please please if you make this horrific chemical burn on my stomach go away I promise I will NEVER ever bleach my stomach hair again EVER!” And then I did it again a few months later. Maybe that god should’ve just had my stomach hair grown in white to begin with, or maybe that god should’ve let me live in a matriarchal society that celebrated my body just doing its damn thing. I recently stopped shaving my underarms because I was bored and wanted to know what my pit hair looked like and guess what? That shit is fucking MAJESTIC. Like two glorious armpit beards. Anyway though! Happy trails! Think about it. Or don’t.
Saw This, Thought of You
+ Heck yes PET STAMPS. Pet stamps! Stamps with pets on them! PET STAMPS.
+ But why are you crying though.
+ CDC Tells Doctors Not to Test for Marijuana. Wowza!
+ Good news, O.C. fans! (me.)
+ Just some board games for couples that you and your one other friendo/luvah can play this weekend while you’re pulling Easter basket grass out of your hair.
Omg Laneia I totally did want to think about body hair for a few minutes this morning! I have never bleached mine but when I was in high school I would use Nair on my stomach. That cannot have been good for my skin! Basically the same idea as the hair bleach I think w/ scary chemicals that leave your skin painful and red. Anyway I think it would be kinder for all of us if we let it grow out and it was just a normal thing for girls to have hair on their stomachs, then maybe teenagers would not be giving themselves chemical burns in their bathrooms after school!
Also, Happy Easter! This is my favorite holiday because chocolate and candy tastes so much better when it’s shaped like an egg. Also I love springtime and bunny rabbits and flowers and Easter dresses. This is the only day of the year that I get excited about wearing a dress.
i’m excited about my dress too! i um, bought it from the maternity section at target. it looks like it’s from free people though and now i get to eat more potato salad.
mmm potato salad
I always used to shave/wax my tummy hair but have not touched it yet in 2016. My skin was suffering, and, yeah, I also just got curious haha. Hope I’m brave enough to keep it up through swimsuit season. I’ve gotten weird looks in the past from partners/roommates/etc., so I’ve always been self-conscious about it, but it’s also at least +10 werewolf points, so.
WEREWOLF POINTS ? ? ? ?
My girlfriend of 4 years has like a tiny belly-button beard and I love it. I used to run my fingers through the long hair all the time when we were inside together. She shaved it off once and then when I went to run my fingers through it, I got super sad. It has since come back and has not gone away again. Seriously it’s the cutest!
Love the pet stamps
i’m going to buy a sheet and horde them for any future pet weddings i might need to send invites for.
What if you’re not a very hairy person and you don’t get a happy trail but a couple of awkward black hairs around your bellybutton? And your armpit beards are not glorious but resemble the pitiful chin of a sixteen-year-old boy trying to grow a beard? What then? Asking for a friend.
Haha yes! My stomach hairs just like to play ring around the belly button, basically. And I shave it. Maybe one day I’ll learn to accept it, but for now, NOPE.
ok see actually i waffle on my armpit beards bc part of me does believe that they would be more appealing if they looked more sparse or were shorter, but then i just remind myself SELF, THAT’S NOT HOW YOUR PIT HAIR GROWS, OK? IT’S JUST NOT. it’s almost like when i came to terms with the fact that the hair on my head doesn’t want to be straightened with a flat iron, nor does it want to coil up into luxurious bouncy curls — it just wants to be wavy and to be left alone.
also confession: i have shaved the one or two stray hairs that grow very low, like well below the fluff, bc it’s like hey what are you even doing down there. get with the program.
in conclusion: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I was so horrified and ashamed when my tummy hair started growing! I didn’t realise women got hair there, and no one ever ever talked about it–in fact, I can’t remember ever encountering any mention of it on women till just. this. moment. I shave it–even though I don’t shave anywhere else, I still shave my tummy, because of that deep weird shame, this fear that my shirt might ride up and someone would discover my hideous secret. Belly button piercings seemed like absolute proof that no one else got this.
It’s massively cathartic to see a public mention of those poor little hairs. I actually feel like a weight’s been lifted from my shoulders. Wow. Ha.
i also didn’t know that girls got hair on their stomachs! like why the fuck don’t they tell us these things??
I came for the cute animal stamps, but I stayed for the armpit beards! =)
the plan worked!
Ugh, the UK’s treatment of LGBT asylum seekers never ceases to horrify me :(
yes ?
As soon as I saw it listed I new it was in the UK without even clicking the link. It’s just so appalling and it isn’t getting better. How many times are we going to have to read stories like this.
YES! I’m on a mission of unconditional self-loveX and one of the things I did, was to let that hair grow! I’m still getting used to the way leg hair looks underneath cropped pants, but I caught a glimpse of my armpit hair and thought, ” DAMN! I have nice armpits!” Armpit hair frames my armpit in a way I didn’t know was possible. So yes!!! I get it! Majestic!
yes! i like the way the breeze blows through the hair on my legs, which is 100% a thing i never expected to like or even think about.
I for real love that feeling
JULIEN BAKER THOUGH
Tiny Magic Person
She almost cries in all the live performances I’ve seen and then I almost cry but I don’t because Music
I wanna put her in my pocket
i would all the way cry because music. i cried the other morning bc the workout instructor told me that we were all in this together re: the 20 burpees we were about to do.
#cry
Watch her audiotree live performance of “Home” on YouTube and weep away my friend
Er, “Go Home”
Oh geez Laneia the crying, the crying.
I watched the Muppet Movie (newest one, in the theater a few years ago) with a bunch of work friends and cried. Then I watched the same movie movie with a different group of friends a few weeks later and cried again.
When i told this story recently (we were sharing embarrassing anectdotes), people replied ‘I cried so much watching Les Mis!’
Les Mis is a Tragedy For Adults. (Also, the music!). The Muppets is a Comedy for Children.
#cry
Wait you GUYS have been stressing out about hair on your abdomens?? Happy Trails? :( :(
Fuzzy Bellies Are Nice this has been a PSA
Like I realize that I get about two thirds of a free pass from Society At Large because I’m really blond and my body hair is like 90% invisible, but I’m still saddened by this news re: Happy Trail Deforestation
when I was trying to be feminine, I shaved my legs etc but now that I’m masculine, my absolute favorite feature is my craaaazy leg hair. Werewolf points, yes! My ex bf even felt a bit emasculated because mine is so dark and thick compared to his, heheh. Although, I still don’t go bare-legged in public because it makes other people uncomfortable or critical of me. I wish I had a happy trail too, though I probably would have hated it and shaved it or hidden it back in the day.
ok reeeeal talk: i also don’t want to make people uncomfortable and have been totally hiding the armpit beards from everyone who doesn’t live with me. and i’m kind of considering shaving everything before we go to my inlaws for easter dinner bc my dress is short and sleeveless! and then i hate myself for thinking that way but also like, i really don’t want to make people uncomfortable and i super don’t want to draw more attention to myself than necessary.
idk what to do!
If it helps, I heard women in Europe do not shave their armpits and go sleeveless. Probably less helpful, I have so much respect for women who wear a dress and body hair in public. My good friend does it and I have so much admiration for her. Anyway, good luck with Easter dinner; the struggle is real and we all feel solidarity with you.
sigh. I get wishing I didn’t feel the way I feel; as I said, it’s a process! :) i’m recovering from surgery so I’ve been bed ridden for the past 5 days. Some cis-gender male friends came over the other night, and I put on a sweatshirt to hide the armpit hair I hadn’t been afraid to flaunt with the women I’m close to. Even worse, I almost peed myself because they were hanging out with me for 6 hours, and I was wearing shorts underneath the blanket and I really didn’t feel like being mocked. To be fair to myself, I haven’t spent much time around these guys in a while, preferring the company of women, but it makes me reflect on these friendships. Is it worth being friends if I fear I’ll be mocked for something I’ve chosen, or have to defend my choices? Hmmmm
Maybe it’s because I am an the amab spectrum of being trans or because I’m light skinned Middle Eastern person; but for myself I am not really fond of my belly hair(may get getting it thinned out). I look at women(both cis and trans) who have these smooth stomachs and get a bit envious. Same with my shoulder hair.
If I remember correctly Michael Jordan, who is part(or is it full) owner of the Charlotte Hornets, has a daughter who isn’t straight and I think on good terms with(?). I wonder if he will say anything or use his pull? Then again he also seems like the type to vote republican and not care.
ok I care a lot about The O.C. and have been complaining with my friends about the SHAME and the TRAVESTY because the entire series isn’t on Netflix and I really wanna be excited that Hulu picked it up but I CAN’T I CANNOT WITH THE ADS(as a person but also literally because I have adblocker and Hulu won’t let me watch anything or makes the ad times a million years longer as punishment with a ‘sorry’ screen) I’m also v pissed that paying for Hulu doesn’t even save you from watching ads?!?! which?!?! what’s the point then if you can just stream it?!?
like hello Netflix do you see the missed opportunity? can you feel my pain?
(also how do they have a Degrassi:TNG original but not??!? the whole?!?! series?!?!)
OMG FAITH. faith. yes. every single — every. single. — time we watch anything on hulu, i slip into mini rage comas over the ads. i can’t believe i’m paying for something and it still has ads. and i refuse to give them EVEN MORE MONEY so i just sit through the same three commercials repeated for hours and feel my soul dying slowly with each second. and hulu isn’t even organized in a normal intuitive way imo, which makes me hate it even more!
whew thank you for speaking the truth.
I also feel as though I am significantly less likely to give money to any company that advertises on Hulu because I have seen their commercial over and over to the point of never wanting to see their product again.
Not trying to defend Hulu, but many of us are paying for cable, yet we are forced to sit through ads there too.
Okay though but the thing I appreciate about the SORRY Hulu screen is then I know for sure how much time I have. I wish all commercials had that. And while we’re on the topic of commercials I find it really annoying on the FX Roku channel that they show a People vs OJ commercial during every break *of* People vs OJ. I AM HERE I GET IT.
I have red in my hair. All of my hair. In varying amounts and shades. Sadly no belly hair, though.
I went No Shave Ever for any reason after I crushed on this girl/friend group for a long time who like, shaved their arms? I didn’t know that was even a thing, but I wanted them to like me, so I tired it, and it gives me mad Trichotillomania.
I have a complicated relationship with my body hair- I’m trans, and therefore there are certain areas (chest especially) where having body hair is viscerally uncomfortable. Despite that, I still leave my happy trail, because I figure, hey, most cis women have them, and my fiancee likes it, so why not keep it around?
I hadn’t realized so many women shave theirs off…
The ‘Who Birthed the Anti-Trans Bathroom Panic?’ article is exactly what I have been looking for to help a friend understand the ways in which some feminist discourse is explicitly harmful.
Laneia you are one of the best people on the Internet and I think this every time a read the newest version of this round up. Your intros and brief commentary are just fantastic.
Armpit beards! Suddenly seeing my pits in a whole new way, thanks Laneia! I’m self-conscious about mine anyway ’cause they’re all scarred up (yay, medical problems!) so I like the idea of not shaving them, but then there’s the whole I reeeeally don’t like making other people uncomfortable thing! PLUS I don’t like how wirey and rough it is. Gimme kitten soft hair and I’d be rocking that shit.
Either way, it’s good to see so many of you lovelies being open about yours!
I went through a phase for several years where I didn’t shave any of my body hair because it was The Feminist Thing To Do and I was a women’s studies major/grad student. HATED IT. Plus, I have PCOS, so I have a lot of facial, chest, and arm hair which I hated even more. Finally, I gave up and started removing it again and felt much better. Now I’m in the process of getting it all lasered off and wish I’d done it ages ago.