Saturday Afternoon
Block A: DIY Body Scrubs (Laneia & Kristen) // Bisexuality/Sexual Fluidity Panel (Stef, Daniela & Rachel) // Swagger 101 (Gabby & Katrina) // Dirty Dancing (Launa) // Drag King Workshop (Kate)
Block B: Introvert Meet-Up (Whitney & Crystal) // High Tea (Laneia & Rachel) // Know Your Whiskey (Alex & Ali) // Angelus Oaks Fashion Week (Liz, Medd, Robin, Carly, Devyn, Mary, Brandy, Julie, Julia, Chloe, Riese, Haviland, Gabby, Rachel Walker & Intern Grace) // Dappy Hour (Gabby & Katrina)
Kate, Contributing Editor & Tiger Beat Counselor: The Drag King Workshop was hands down my absolute favorite thing about A Camp. I was originally going to do a standard “how to get into drag king mode” workshop, but it took me about five minutes to realize that this was not what the workshop needed to be about. Instead, we had an intense conversation about gender and drag as therapy and the figures in our lives we wanted to emulate. I had been trying to avoid my emotions all day, but this ended up being the most emotional afternoon yet. It was entirely worth it. It was cathartic, actually. We talked about owning spaces with body language, and building confidence through our behaviors. By the time we got to facial hair, I saw a very quiet and introverted bunch transform into a room full of grinning swaggering characters who were socially comfortable and teasing each other. That transformation almost made me cry. I am so, so, so, so proud of the Drag King Bunch for being willing to explore an intense and often difficult part of their identities, wrestling with some tough questions, and still managing to have a blast and be incredibly accepting and wonderful to each other. You handsome, beautiful bunch – It was an absolute privilege to draw your facial hair. Johnny Thunder wipes a manly tear in your honor.
Riese: My favorite thing about The Bisexuality/Sexual Fluidity Panel, besides the actual panel, were all the joked-up names Stef and Rachel used to refer to the panel prior to the panel, including but not limited to The Dirty Sluts Panel and The Blow Job Panel. We have Stupid Bisexual Stereotype Humor Shorthand.
Daniela, Intern & Starjammers Counselor:Â Having gone to Camp 1.0 as a camper who was scared of being judged for having a long term relationship with a cis man, the sexual fluidity panel felt cozy like a little camp fire.
Stef: The Sexual Fluidity Panel was probably the most pressure I’ve put on myself to do anything in all of A-Camp history. I’ve felt like Autostraddle needed to be talking more about bisexuality for quite some time, and I was really thrilled for the opportunity to do so at this camp. I’ve never been so nervous to have Riese sit in on an activity I’ve done.
Riese: Once upon a time I’d decided to dedicate my life to writing a memoir/non-fiction book about bisexuality and was really immersed in figuring bisexuality out for myself and also I read like ten books about bisexuality, interviewed a bunch of bisexual girls, and conducted a huge survey of bisexual women — and so I was really interested to hear other people talk about something I’ve written 300 unpublished pages about! I only had half an hour or so before I had to go get styled by Brandy for the fashion show, but I was really excited for this panel and wanted to catch as much of it as I could.
Stef: Rachel, Daniela and I talked at length about our own experiences with labels and sexual fluidity in general, and the audience gave us a lot to work with. I’m incredibly grateful the campers gave us the chance to start having this conversation and helped us make A-Camp a more inclusive space. We’re not done talking about it, I promise! Also, this panel was really important because we made our moderator Intern Grace an honorary bisexual, and she’s terribly, terribly excited about it.
Daniela:Â The discussion itself was difficult at times because of all the charged meanings behind particular labels, but talking out in the open about our want for community and facilitating the discussion about sexuality beyond monosexuality was a thing that soothed some of the discomfort I didn’t know I had around my own representation of my sexuality. Having so many campers be there to chat about the challenges of creating an inclusive community that doesn’t wash over some of its members was a difficult, but oh so damn encouraging conversation to have.
Riese: I feel like it opened up a space that needed to be opened up for people to live inside and breathe on this mountain.
Swagger 101
Meredydd, Business Advisor & Golden Girls Counselor:Â After missing Swagger 101Â at the past two camps I was excited to have a free block when Gabby and Katrina were running Swagger 101. I thought it would be all about picking up chicks (and it was) but it was also so much more. I loved the way they communicated and made it a safe space for everyone to move past their fears.
Katrina, Writer & Foxfire Counselor: What I like about Swagger 101 is that it’s kind of a total misnomer. The idea of “swagger” always felt like a male-fronted bastion of asshole behavior and false bravado, but for me and Gabby, swagger is (surprise) about feelings and honesty and vulnerability, and most of all, it’s about yourself.
Gabby: I asked Katrina if maybe we should change the name to something like “GeekSwag” or “GentleQueer Swag” and I got a resounding ‘hell no’. Katrina said that everyone has the right to own their swag. We can categorize it however we choose to but we don’t need to further cloak our queer sexiness in everything that is awkward. This is why we’re partners and part of the reason I can’t imagine any of my activities/workshops at camp without Señor Casiño. KC just gets it. We kept the name and upped our workshop game.
Cee, Tech Director & Golden Girls Counselor:Â I was really touched by the intro to Gabby & Katrina’s swagger workshop. It was my first time checking it out, and I’m glad I did. They lined up everyone face to face and made people tell the person opposite them what their biggest fear about approaching someone is. Since I was observing, I heard a wave of insecurities which really humbled me. It made me realize that their workshop was probably going to be really helpful for so many women, and that so many of us have the same fears and insecurities.
Katrina:Â We did this new exercise in the beginning where we had everyone line up and tell each other their insecurities about approaching someone, and I don’t know. It was this moment of totally visceral honesty and fear, and I loved it. I just totally loved it. I like to be afraid of things sometimes, because if you’re never afraid of anything, then you’ll never know your potential to overcome those things. Fear just means you’re a human animal, you know? You can’t rise to the challenge if there’s no challenge. You did it, and that was cool. So thank you.
Gabby: We brainstormed ways to make sure that people who came to the workshop had to (if they chose to participate and we always provide the option to just sit and chill and watch) look each other in the eyes. We wanted them up and practicing our suggestions and role playing all of the situations that they found intimidating in real life. We also needed to talk about some fucked up things that happen in the social scenes we try to thrive in off the mountain.
We call bullshit on the following real life scenarios:
1 – Trying to out-butch someone or using your butch presentation to intimidate someone trying to talk to your lady or otherwise-identified boo. Example: you go to the bathroom at the club, you come back and your boo is talking to someone who reads as “BUTCH” and you come back all on some, “Oh who’s this?” and “Umm, excuse me, that’s my girl” type shit, eyeballing everyone and grilling your boo like some major thing has occured and you need to pee a circle around the person you’re with. That shit is boring. I’ve done it and it makes everything terrible. At Swag 101, three awesome campers role played a way for everyone to just fucking kindly introduce themselves.
2 – Keeping silent. Example: a sweet self-identified femme walks by your group of friends at the club and either everyone assumes she’s straight or tries to throw themselves at her. At Swag we talked about a concept called “Ally Up.” Like in the moment, feel free to call out your friends or that asshole dyke at the bar who reinforces stereotypes, who loudly assumes they know every category that every queer person is in and who maintains those distinctions by vocalizing them while everyone else keeps their mouths shut. Maybe that exquisite queer in a fly-ass dress isn’t a femme, maybe they’re just a person who wants a drink and some nice conversation. Maybe we all just treat each other, like people? Least that’s the conclusion we came to at the workshop, together, as a f*cking badass family.
3 – Assumptions. this was kind of the general theme of the workshop and of life. We go out into the world and unintentionally assume that everything is as we see it. We keep our queer eyes on and still assume all the things. Two people, one who reads as butch and one who reads as femme, are automatically pegged as a couple, one is obvs the top and the other needs to be catered to and treated like a princess. We stereotype ourselves before we introduce ourselves to each other and it’s bullshit. One, there’s way more to life than any assumed butch/femme dynamic. Two, from what we gathered at the workshop, we’re so so tired of dealing with these attitudes from each other. We’re tired of navigating lesbian/queer circles where there’s no room to just be social and sexy and we’ve got to be all minding our presentations and shit.
Ya’ll were flawless at Swag. You looked each other in the eyes and affirmed all the things that suck about dating, flirting and navigating gay social scenes. Then you took the workshop seriously and opened yourselves up to each other. It was beautiful. We all shared our tips for flirting, nailing compliments and handling rejection.
1 – Flirting: Don’t be a creeper. Know when to be cute and when to just walk away.
2 – Compliments: They’ve got to be sincere, interesting and again as non-creepy as possible. Also, give them without expecting anything in return.
3 – Rejection – Happens to all of us so don’t let it be the thing that defines you or your whole night.
These are summaries of the awesomeness that is all of us queers talking about picking each other up and being fly on a mountain. It’s what happens when we decide to have each other’s backs, be the best wingqueers we can be and stay open to letting others be flirtatious and explore our confidence and sex appeal in a social setting.
