Quiz: Write a Gay Romcom, I’ll Tell You Which Iconic Christmas Movie Is Your Destiny

a retro purple holiday card banner that says HOLIGAYS 2023 with a white border and purple, blue, and teal snowflakes — Holigays 2023

I think of Christmas movies as primarily coming in two genres. There are the cheesy, predictable, often low-budget but almost always oddly satisfying Christmas romcoms that used to run on cable and now run on streaming. Your Hallmark movies, your Trello originals.

Then on the other side of things, you have your classic Christmas films. Back when Hollywood spent money and stars were stars (yes, one of the options in this quiz is Happiest Season and yes Happiest Season only came out three years ago… but look me in the eye and tell me it’s not already a classic? You cannot.)

Don’t get me wrong, I love both genres! But what happens if we combine these two things, what if we write the cheesy made-for-cable romcom of our dreams, and an iconic Christmas movie pops out instead. There’s only one way to find out! Fill out these writing prompts and I’ll tell you which iconic Christmas movie you’re destined to watch this year (preferably with some vegan hot cocoa and a cozy couch blanket, but don’t let me micromanage your joy!).

Write a Gay Romcom, I’ll Tell You Which Iconic Christmas Movie Is Your Destiny!

First things first, where does our romantic tale take place?(Required)

A snowy small town getting ready for their annual holiday festival

A bustling city in December, full of twinkling city lights.

A gossipy (but pleasantly quirky!) ski lodge, where everyone is in your business.

An unexpected adventure through snow capped woods and evergreen trees

A historic, picturesque Inn with dark mahogany walls and flickering candles

A rustic and cozy mountain cabin.

Describe your protagonist:(Required)

The Second Chance Believer: A protagonist looking to pick themselves up, dust themselves off, and leap once again towards the fragility of love after having gone through a difficult heartbreak.

The Workplace Romeo: A protagonist navigating the delicate balance between their professional life and matters of the heart.

The Reluctant Dater: A protagonist who approaches love with a heavy dose of skepticism or fear of commitment, someone who needs an extra push from the universe (or their friends!) into the often unpredictable world of dating.

The Loveable Underdog: An endearing protagonist who, despite facing numerous — and often embarrassing!! — public setbacks in their dating life, never gives up on the possibility of finding love.

The Hopeless Romantic: Such a classic! A dreamy and idealistic protagonist who believes every day can be an opportunity for true love .

The Quirky Eccentric: A charming protagonist who approaches love with unexpected curiosity, marching to the beat of their own drum in their hopes of a heartwarming connection.

Now, pick a love interest:(Required)

The Childhood Sweetheart: There are times when time apart is exactly what the heart needs, giving your love story deep roots. Someone your protagonist grew up with, but as it turns out, never grew apart from.

The Ambitious Politician: The charismatic civil servant with a killer wardrobe of suits, a big heart, and even bigger dreams with three different calendar planning apps, a full-time assistant, and not a second to spare — except for the person they love.

The Unconventional Artist: A free-spirit who challenges your protagonist in every way, encouraging spontaneity and creativity instead of monotony and routine.

The Supportive Dance Instructor: A patient and supportive teacher who knows every move a body make (that’s what she said), and guides your protagonist both on and off the dance floor.

The Mysterious Bookstore Owner: A captivating bookstore owner with a sexy and unknown past, sharing a love for literature and woo’ing your protagonist with their deep insights into the world of romance.

The Tattoo Artist: A flirtatious tattoo artist who brings a touch of magic to everything they create.

What’s their meet-cute?(Required)

Attending a high school reunion, our protagonist reconnects with the girl she used to make out with in the janitor’s closet… while they were both in the closet. Now as adults who are a little tipsy on spiked punch, they decide to recreate it, you know, for old time’s sake.

During a company team-building retreat, our protagonist and a colleague get lost in the wilderness. Between toasty cold noses and fresh fallen snow, they kiss before they even realize what’s going on.

Forced into attending a speed-dating event by friends, our protagonist mistakenly sits at the wrong table and ends up striking a connection when they least expect it.

While participating in a community baking class for singles to boost their self-confidence in the kitchen, our protagonist stumbles over some spilled flour and collides into the open arms of a fellow classmate, sparks fly.

In a quaint bookstore, our protagonist accidentally knocks over a tower of books, only to be helped off the ground by a charming stranger who shares their love for Malinda Lo.

At a winter carnival with an automated fortune-teller booth, our protagonist receives a whimsical prediction about their future love, setting off a wild chain of events that ultimately leads them towards their destiny.

Second act! Peak romance is all around us! What Christmas activity is their first date?(Required)

A stroll through a quiet, shimmering Christmas night market.

A booming holiday house party hosted by the protagonist’s best friend (hey! The bestie’s approval was going to be needed eventually, why not right at the top?)

Ice Skating.

Sunrise hot cocoa and a jog around the park before work.|

A horse-drawn carriage ride through a snowy landscape.

Judging an ice sculpture contest in the town square — together! Awww.

What famous Christmas pop song plays over their cutesy falling in love montage?(Required)

Jingle Bell Rock, the Mean Girls version

Santa Baby, sung by Naya Rivera as Santana from Glee

All I Want for Christmas Is You, sung by Mariah Carey

You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch, the original from the movie

Last Christmas, sung by Wham!

Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer, sung by Destiny’s Child

Oh no!!!! It’s time for the classic third act conflict! What happens?(Required)

Small simmering fights that were being ignored finally blow up over dinner one night. It turns out you can’t outrun conflict after all.

One character’s focus on climbing the corporate ladder clashes with the other’s desire for a work-life balance.

One character’s need for spontaneity clashes with the other’s need for calm and structure.

Insecurities surface, triggering hurt feelings and leading to a heartbreaking argument about self-worth.

One character’s idealistic optimism clashes with the other’s more guarded nature, leading to a heated argument about the importance of vulnerability in a relationship.

An ex comes sauntering into town. I’m not saying there’s cheating involved, but also… we’ve all seen “The L Word. “

And what life lesson does your protagonist learn after the couple breaks up?(Required)

“A successful relationship requires acknowledging past mistakes, learning from them, and moving forward with a renewed sense of commitment.”

“A successful relationship requires balance, communication, and boundaries.”

“Step out of your comfort zone, you never know what’s on the other side of a closed door.”

“Assuming the worst in every possible scenario means that the worst is all you will ever see.”

“Love is not always a fairy tale, but a journey.”

“You can’t lose all of yourself in a relationship, no matter what happens, you have to keep part of you… for you.”

And what big romantic gesture brings your couple back together in the grand finale?(Required)

A private concert featuring the small town’s band — all dressed up, of course. The concert ends with a proposal on stage with a custom-made engagement ring.

A slideshow projection is streamed against a brick wall on a public street, the crowd gathers as music plays in tune with silly selfies, videos, and mementos of the central couple. And yes, the presentation also ends with a Christmas proposal.

A destination vacation at a picturesque and warm location, inviting the protagonist’s close friends and family, all the B and C plot characters, to also celebrate with them as the credits roll.

A flash mob (you can never go wrong with a flash mob!) that ends with each of the dancers handing the protagonist a single white rose.

A hot air balloon ride, wrapped up in cozy winter coats, under the stars!

A Christmas parade ends in confetti everywhere and our protagonist gets swept up off their feet and back into the love interest’s arm, laughing as the screen fades to black.

And finally, we have to name your masterpiece! Pick a cheesy Christmas movie title for your little romp?(Required)

“Frosty Flirtations”

“Snowflake Serenades”

“Sleigh Bells and Heart Swells”

“Tangled Tinsel Tango”

“The Jolly Wanderer”

“The Jingle Bell Mix-Up”

Which iconic Chrstmas movie do YOU think is your destiny to watch this winter? This won’t affect results, but can help break a tie.

The Preacher’s Wife

Miracle on 34th Street

Love Actually

Happiest Season

Last Holiday

The Family Stone

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Comments

Cate

November 26, 2023 at 6:11 am

Lmao I got the family stone, which is ironic, because I can’t overstate how much I hate that movie. 😂

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- CL
  
  November 26, 2023 at 2:04 pm
  
  Same but with Love Actually.
  
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Elisabeth

November 26, 2023 at 7:27 am

I got “Last Holiday” which is scary ironic because I just watched it for the first time last night! It is so delightful that I’m bummed I hadn’t seen it before, and agree 100% that it’s lesbian culture.

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Phoebe

November 26, 2023 at 8:27 am

I keep getting sent back to a blank version of the quiz when I press submit

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- Feliks
  
  November 26, 2023 at 9:02 am
  
  Same!
  
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- Jae
  
  November 26, 2023 at 9:46 am
  
  Same. But I am choosing to believe this means we aren’t meant to get a Christmas movie and instead get a sort of meta Groundhog’s Day, but queer? Groundhog’s Gay? Yeah, our film is Groundhog’s Gay.
  
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- Calico Darkling
  
  November 26, 2023 at 1:28 pm
  
  Yeah, same here. I tried taking the quiz more than once, too…
  
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Rachel

November 26, 2023 at 11:27 am

Love Actually? Never seen it.

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- Calico Darkling
  
  November 26, 2023 at 1:28 pm
  
  You should, it’s cute! =)
  
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- cleo
  
  November 27, 2023 at 7:58 am
  
  I feel like I should give you some sort of award for that. I really hate Love Actually.
  
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- Jack
  
  November 27, 2023 at 11:45 am
  
  it has not aged well, I prefer “The Holiday” with Jack Black and Kate Winslet instead
  
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cleo

November 27, 2023 at 7:57 am

I got The Family Stone, which I’ve never seen. But I do love me a good NPR tote bag, so I may have to watch it this year.

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- Sid
  
  December 3, 2023 at 3:07 pm
  
  I am truly devastated that Under the Christmas Tree which was infinity less problematic than Happiest Season, Canadian, and has three queer actors in it was not a possible option. 😭
  
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