Quiz: Which Fictional Queer Jock Are You?

It is the SUMMER OF GAY SPORT! WNBA, NWSL, World Cup! And you know what that means: queer jocks everywhere! Cliches are cliches for a reason. And so, I made you a little quiz so you can know in your heart which fictional queer jock you are. Please share your results in the comments!

Quiz: Which Fictional Queer Jock Are You?

Pick a 2023 Women's World Cup kit.(Required)

Australia

USA

Jamaica

Netherlands

Japan

New Zealand

Colombia

Nigeria

What's your workout jam?(Required)

“Level Up,” Ciara

“Eye of the Tiger,” Survivor

“Good As Hell,” Lizzo

“Cuff It” by Beyoncé“

“Anti-Hero” by Taylor Swift

“Work B-tch,” Britney Spears

“Pour It Up,” Rihanna

“Grrrl Like,” Dope Saint Jude

Choose a team captain.(Required)

Kristy Thomas

Monica Wright

Gabrielle “Isis” Union

Jo DeLuca

Roy Kent

Tim Riggins

Santana Lopez

Air Bud

Which of these statements best describes you?(Required)

I’m pretty sure love really is a lie.

I pretend to be independent but I’m honestly kinda clingy.

I would rather eat a raw denim jacket than be forced to do small talk.

I’m like RAWR!!! on the outside — but a real softie on the inside.

My toxic trait is that I’ll say “no worries at all!” when I am absolutely seething.

I make bad choices look good.

I wish someone else would pick out every meal for me, I am so tired of trying to figure out what to eat.

I really do hate capitalism, but I also would not mind being rich.

Who's your pregame fit icon?(Required)

Breanna Stewart, New York Liberty

Layshia Clarendon, Los Angeles Sparks

Mandy Freeman, NJ/NY Gotham FC

Chelsea Gray, Las Vegas Aces

Serena Williams, no explanation needed

The USWNT

Tziarra King, OL Reign

Sam Kerr

What quote's on the motivational poster in your locker?(Required)

“You can’t keep blaming yourself. Just blame yourself once and move on.” -Homer Simpson

“Today me will live in the moment unless it’s unpleasant in which case me will eat a cookie.” – Cookie Monster

“This is my family. I found it all on my own. It’s a little broken but still good. Yeah, still good.” – Stitch

“You can handle anything for ten seconds.” – Kimmy Schmidt

“Sucking at something is the first step being sorta good at something.” – Jake the Dog

“It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That is not weakness, that is life.” – Jean-Luc Picard

“I am the plan.” – Buffy

“Even miracles take a little time.” – Fairy Godmother

Which animal would you choose as your own personal mascot to fit your whole vibe?(Required)

Strawberry-munchin’ turtle

Proud llama

Majestic zebra

Curious puffin

Wolf pretending to be a little house puppy

Cheerful quokka

Motherfuckin’ owlbear

Suspicious meerkat

You won! Where are you headed to celebrate?(Required)

A bar with the whole team!

The training room for an ice soak and a massage.

A quiet restaurant for a meal with my family.

D A N C I N G

Back out there for a cooldown workout. If you stay ready, you don’t have to get ready.

Wherever my crush is headed to celebrate.

Home to my own bathtub and my own bed.

I’ll probably see if Coach wants to go over the game film.

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