What’s in a name? A character. What’s in a face? A story. Here are the nominees for best cinematography. *I stare into the camera along with my co-presenter, Stanley Tucci, and we hold for five-more-than-anticipated seconds in silence as we wait for a delayed b-roll also someone coughs in the background*
Our faces: they can affirm or betray us. They are our narratives laid bare. And since we’ve talked a lot about Cate’s, it’s only fair we turn the camera around to Rooney’s. Where we were able to use Cate’s face as it related to Carol, Rooney’s face as Therese was necessarily restrictive, so we’ll have to take this outside the confines of the screen. For no reason, I’ve chosen to analyze Rooney’s face as it relates to every co-star she’s been with on a press tour or at an award ceremony and made it into a fun game.
It’s called “Which Co-Star is Rooney With?”, and because I still want to keep this Carol themed, your answers will either be “Cate Blanchett” or “Not Cate Blanchett.” Take it slow on the scroll – you don’t want to spoil the answer! I’ll let you decide the story Rooney’s face is telling, and don’t forget to comment with your score! Are you ready to play?
On a break between interviewing job candidates. Legit considering swapping the interview with this test.
quick print these out
THIS IS SO GREAT
– rooney mara about cate’s face
She should probably leave Joaquin Phoenix for her true love, Cate Blanchett. Those faces!
it honestly hurts
This is fucking brilliant
I mean, I knew this would be easy but… just wow
Ok I’m one of those failures-of-a-lesbian who watched Carol and thought it was merely pretty good, but… these posts… they’re killing me… and I can feel the effect they’re having on my subconconscious… Day 9 and I’m already starting to believe I that really liked the movie and am developing a strange infautation with Cate (who’s not even my type)… by Day 30 I’m going to have lost my own opinion completely and will likely be watching Carol on repeat while I pine over Cate and probably start social media stalking her… damn you Erin… I should turn away while I’m still an intact, autonomous person, but… I won’t.
jenn join us it’s so…warm in here
YES THIS. But I’ve already started pining. Someone help me.
this is truly wonderful investigative journalism
rooney did all the work here
Empirical evidence Cate Blanchett is a goddess.
Taking into consideration both the old-fashioned and the modern definitions of the adjective ‘gay’, I think it’s safe to conclude that Cate Blanchett makes Rooney Mara gay².
This almost brought a tear to my eye.
Mara looking at Cate as though she’s a dessert she didn’t order but is wondering if she can get away with having before the waiter notices.
oh this is so sweet and correct
I mean really this should be part of deprogramming the patriarchy. You couldn’t look at these and not believe that being queer is the logical, superior option.
Agreed
What’s this, what’s this,
There Rooney everywhere,
What’s this, what’s this,
She’s giving Cate “The Stare”,
What’s this
What’s this, what’s this,
There’s something very wrong
What’s this,
The media is singing our song,
What’s this,
The streets are lined with
Baby gays laughing,
Everybody seems so happy,
Have I possibly gone daffy,
What is this, What is this
There’s angels singing chorus,
Inside our little heads,
We’re watching the thirst between them,
It’s knocking us all dead
WHAT IS THIS,
Caroltown, hmmmm
This is my absolute favorite so far.
Same here. I’m laughing so hard right now.
lololololol
I hope you get a ton of comment awards
I think Kristana should get the comment award for the next year, simply transformative
I’m very slightly disappointed you didn’t manage to the the word “dimples” in there somehow, but I appreciate it’s hard to rhyme.
It’s just that when she was directed to have eye sex with Cate she assumed it meant for the rest of her life
Celebrities: they are just like us!
Completely obsessed with Cate Blanchett, no reaction towards men…
there’s a fanvid of cate set to britney spears womanizer and it’s pictures and videos of celebrities falling over themselves for cate
You’re saving that for day 30, right?
was thinking about it
Ah, I see what you did here. Nice. Also, her Casey Affleck faces are spot on. Just ask Brie Larson.
The look on her face coupled with the turn away from that POS is a thing of beauty.
Right? All the pics with Cate, dimples so deep you could fall into them OR she’s staring at her like Cate is water and she’s in a man-desert. All the pics with guys, Rooney looks like they just farted.
Oh the dimples !
There is a bias here and honestly I subscribe to it
this is pure objectivity!!!
My girlfriend and I did this quiz together and neither of us recognized any of the men: “Who’s that?” “I have no idea.”
Living the dream.
it’s what i imagined making it
Same
Oh. My. Goddess.
This is both fantastic and brutal. My heart HURTS for how viciously you called out poor Rooney here. If anyone ever put ONE picture like this of me in a public forum, thus revealing my obvious soul-wrenching crush, much less approximately one million, each of which only adds to the terrible/wonderful pile of evidence against me! I cannot.
But also, thank you.
(Also, do you think she knows??)
just givin rooney a little razz. and she knows
I mean, you stand in front of all the cameras at Cannes and look at cate like that how could you not know? (and also, Cate does the same so…)
Rooney is all of us.
That Daniel Craig one is painful
The awkward/forced arm around her shoulder thing is THE WORST
PERSONAL favorite
How often is Todd Haynes the only thing standing in the way of eye sex turning into very public actual sex?
This is such a metaphor for the patriarchy
And now I understand the meaning of the phrase “__ gives me life!”
ROON-DOG! Marry her.
These just get better and better.
I loved Carol and love your writing, Erin, but was had no idea this feature could be as deliciously entertaining as you have been making it. Thank you.
“we hold for five-more-than-anticipated seconds in silence as we wait for a delayed b-roll also someone coughs in the background*
(got one wrong, loved the whole thing).
thank you marcie!!
I don’t love Rooney Mara’s acting, but I do watch Carol every single night.
This made me feel happy like Rooney in looooove
Point taken!
OK, this is oooold, and I loved it at first read, but I’ve cracked the code.
Dimples = Cate. No dimples = everyone else, including that troll she’s inexplicably dug out from under the bridge and is “dating”.