The Comment Awards Are Buying a Gender Traitor Onesie for Their Dog

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Hi muffins! We made it through to another Friday! Tonight I hope you have a chance to stand under the moon. She’s feeling a little neglected on account of not being ‘super’ any longer, and she misses you.

This week, Vanessa’s queering Hanukkah.

Need a Christmas movie to get you through? Erin’s got you covered.

Cheryl. Blossom. Okay? Okay.

Oh my goodness, this is so very, very cool: Black Queer Teenage Detective Comic “Goldie Vance” Is Gonna Be a Movie!

ROSA DIAZ IS BISEXUAL, STEPHANIE BEATRIZ IS PERFECT, everything is fine, I definitely didn’t just start crying reading this.

And then there were your comments!


On Holiday Gift Guide: What Sex Toy To Gift No Matter How Many Partners You Have:

The Manifest Your Destiny Award to Jenna:

I am unfortunately *not* attending a Holiday Lesbian Sex Orgy this year (that I know of)… but now I really want to.

On Winter 2017/2018 TV Preview: Some Lesbian and Bisexual Content for Y’all:

The Match Made in…Heaven? Award to Catherine, Chandra and Chloe:

The Fork Yes Award to Catherine, Chandra and Chloe: THE GOOD PLACE COMES BACK ON MY BIRTHDAY AND ALL I WANT IS FOR ELEANOR AND TAHANI TO FORK FORK YES, PREACH THAT SHIRT Forking is the new scissoring. Put that on a t-shirt.

On Brooklyn Nine-Nine’s Rosa Diaz Comes Out as Bisexual, Stephanie Beatriz Blesses Us Again:

The Jane The Girlfriend Award to Natalie:

I’m just going to leave this here…a timely reminder for the Brooklyn 99 writers: (GINA RODRIGUEZ WANTS TO PLAY STEPHANIE BEATRIZ'S GIRLFRIEND ON BROOKLYN 99)

On 7 Holiday Movies Ripe for Temporary Disassociation From All This, Ranked:

The Fly Your Freak Flag Award to Diana:

I dated this woman that when we watched the Family Stone together, she immediately told me how much Sarah Jessica Parker’s character was just like her. I spent days after going around telling friends and family to go watch the movie, telling them Sarah Jessica Parker’s character was just like her. In retrospect, I’m not sure why I didn’t break up with her right then.

And the Year Of Our Carol 2054 Award to Rous Rose:

The year is 2054. I (the mommiest of matriarchs) have my entire family over for the holidays. My (probs severely emotionally damaged) offspring deal with their childhood baggage by ghosting themselves utilising what they have at their disposal: the movies that have been playing in the background of their prep/meal/gathering at a volume just barely audible to the human ear and those movies are Carol (2015) dir. Todd Haynes.

On Holigay Gift Guide: For the Queer With A Room of Her Own:

The My Favorite Podcast Award to Ann:

Is there a gift that will keep all the true crime playlists you listen to during the day from keeping you up at night?? Asking for a friend (who has never mistaken her chair for a home intruder…)

And on Holiday Merch Alert: Gender Traitor Sweatshirts, Gay Glittery Horses, Restocks of All Your Faves and an Enamel Pin Sale!

The Oh My Dog Award to Molly Priddy and Carmen San Diego:

Molly: I will take one of each please, even the baby onesie. For my dog. / Carmen: Oh. My. Dog. I haven't considered this? Will it fit? Molly: ONLY ONE WAY TO FIND OUT


See a funny or amazing comment that needs to be here? E-mail me at queergirlblogs [at] gmail [dot] com!

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Darcy

Darcy, a.k.a. Queer Girl, is your number one fan. They're a fat feminist from California who doodles hearts in the corners of their Gay Agenda. They're living through a pandemic, they're on Twitter, and they think you should drink more water! They also wanna make you laugh.

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19 Comments

  1. I am very much looking forward to the babies and doggos in AS merch photo gallery.

    (This is how manifestations work right?)

  2. I suppose I would need to make a hole for her tail in the onesie’s butt… And, of course, buy a Gender Traitor T-shirt for myself so we can go around twinning

  3. I bet the reason Rosa Diaz came out as bi is because Stephanie Beatriz read that AS article and was like “HEY, WRITERS…”

  4. If Elahani ever actually happens I will LOSE MY SHIRT. (And probably also my pants.)

    Btw QG I guess our comment left you so speechless that we didn’t get an award name? ;)

  5. Thank you for the award, Queer Girl! <3

    By the way, you're all invited to my 2054 Christmas dinner party. I'll most likely still be as bad at cooking and not being a chaotic mess as I am now, but I'll have a lot of pets to cuddle with and my wife Kate McKinnon will be present so there's that.

  6. NOW I AM SAD THAT MY DOG WILL IN NO WAY FIT IN A BABY ONSIE BECAUSE HE IS APPROXIMATELY FIFTY POUNDS AND GROWING ABOUT FIVE POUNDS A WEEK AND LIKE DANG THAT WOULD HAVE LED TO SOME EVEN MORE ADORABLE PUPPY PHOTOS

    • THE CATS MIGHT FIT THOUGH

      The Queen might disembowel me as a result though. The grumpy old man probably would be fine once it was on him, but…well…he’s very heteronormative. Queen Win…well, yeah, she’s the gender traitorest of all cats, so it might be worth the effort (I’m just afraid about how her poofy fur would look in a onsie though because I feel like it’d be ridiculous and not majestic at all).

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