I used to live in an old, rambling house full of hidden passages and unusual renovations, like dead-end staircases tucked inside closets. One summer, we were hit by a powerful thunderstorm with strong winds. As we rushed around closing the rattling windows and rescuing everything that had blown off of walls and tables, we heard a loud banging in the hallway upstairs. Torn free from layers of paint and wallpaper and drywall, a door we’d never seen before banged gently against the wall. It opened onto one of the hidden staircases. The wind had curled into this windowless hallway, somehow, and opened a passage that had been sealed for dozens of years.

This is a lot like how eclipses work. They feel like a sudden turn of weather, a cloud moving across the sun. They open doors, especially mysterious ones. Like a thunderstorm, they can feel thrilling and cleansing. Like a thunderstorm, they can feel alarming and dangerous. It all depends on where you’re positioned and what you’re ready to change. We’re graced with two eclipses this month—one in Virgo on the 1st and one in Pisces on the 16th. This is a great time to release those old, dead stories about needing to be perfect to deserve being loved. This is a perfect time to remember that you get to make new choices about the present moment, free of attachment to the past or fear of the future.

In our relationships, eclipses tend to stimulate our desire for big changes— whether that means breaking up, moving in, opening up the relationship, having babies, navigating gender transition, or any other decision that will change how your intimacies look. Sometimes eclipses come with such strong feelings that we want to change everything right away—merely because it’s uncomfortable to sustain a strong feeling without acting on it. Generally, though, it’s a good idea to wait until the winds die down (on September 23rd) before changing up your life for good. Unless you’re in a very bad situation where your safety is at risk, consider holding the feelings that come up right now before making any decisions yet.

So how intense will this eclipse season feel for you? That depends on a few factors. First, how closely do these eclipses fall to planets in your birth chart? If you’re feeling like you want support around this, find a pro to look at your chart with you. This will be key for folks born near the beginning or middle of September, December, March, or June. I’m available for readings to help you strategize your eclipse season and the six months of transition that follow it. Second, eclipses shine a light on what’s been hidden. How ready are you to look into the secrets of your own heart? Transitional times are always harder when we resist them, and insist there’s nothing we still need to learn about our sexuality or fears of intimacy. What will help you feel safe as you explore this internal terrain?

This month also brings us the last exact square between Saturn (discipline, reality, commitment) and Neptune (compassion, imagination, romance) on the 10th, in the middle of the eclipses. Imagine two dear friends—one a serious and reserved overachiever; the other a dreamy, empathic healer—and each of them is trying to give you some good advice about balancing commitments and compassion in your life. They may talk over each other, they may contradict each other, but they both have information you need. Spend some time alone this week, considering what structures you need to help you live the life of your dreams, and come to terms with what will always be imperfect. As always, take only what resonates from these horoscopes! The astro-literate are advised to read their Venus and Moon signs first, and the hella-astro-literate are encouraged to find out where the eclipses are falling in their own and their friends’ charts (I’ll add some details about how to do that in the comments).

Aries

As summer ends, you’re still grasping at that fleeting sense of freedom that the longer days promise. This month brings you back to earth, back to your obligations, and asks you to buckle down and get back to work. The good news is that the chaos of the last six months have come to a close; you’ve finished a growth cycle, and now you get to establish new routines and new patterns. Be brave enough to talk to the people who intimidate you, and ask them to teach you something you’ve wanted to learn. Make sure your committed relationships stay lively enough that you don’t feel trapped. Finally, pay extra attention to your dreams this month, as you’re sleeping mind is being bombarded with secret love notes, and a few of them might make it through.

Taurus

I hate to break it to you, but some amazing new adventures are in store for you this month. If you are strongly Taurean, the words “new” and “adventure” may not sound at all appealing. Like a cat sleeping happily on someone’s coat, you may blink reproachfully at anyone who tries to move you, even if they’re offering treats and cuddling. You need your own rhythm, dear Taurus, and this month may be a little hectic for you. The good news, though, is that there are definitely treats and cuddling in store. Someone new may come into your life that gets you purring; or an old relationship could rekindle sweet and tender feelings. Insist on moving slowly when it comes to sex, though. You haven’t always been clear about what feels good for you and how to be fully present—take this time to pace yourself and learn as much as you can about how your desires currently manifest.

Gemini

This month continues and intensifies the work you’ve been doing in your committed relationships. These could be your life partners, your housemates, your business partners, your artistic collaborators—anyone you’ve signed on to work through the harder parts of intimacy in order to keep doing something long-term. Expect some big questions to come up around your chosen family, and the way y’all make home together, in your actual houses and in your hearts. You’re undergoing some big transformations on the home front this month, which could mean releasing attachment to old family patterns or welcoming new folks into your inner circle. Meanwhile, you might feel some tension between your ambitions and your partnerships—a theme of this year that has its last big energetic push this month. How have you learned to resolve those different desires? What might you need to fine tune?

Cancer

Your friends and crushes and romances may be going through some wild rides this month, but you can choose exactly how much you want to participate in their shenanigans. Watch out for the ways that you play a supporting role (being the shoulder to cry on, cleaning up a mess someone else made), and make good choices about when (and for how long) you’re willing to put aside your own desires to help someone out. Especially because this month will bring a lot of people into your life, some passing through and some to stay, and you want to save some of your energy for communing with your own sweet soul. If you feel called to tend, prune, nurture, or cultivate anything this month, start with what gives you most pleasure.

Leo

In every romance, we can either plan for the future or firmly refuse to speculate about it. Inevitably, though, expectations and hopes crowd around the edges of every beautiful connection. We want this moment—of tenderness, of recognition, of wonder, of ecstasy—to return to us as soon as it’s over. We want a future where that’s a guarantee. This month, you’re learning to examine the hopes and fears you have about permanence. Moving past the fear, recognizing uncertainty as a friend, you can grow much closer to everyone you love. Now is the time to banish those demons that tell you the hole in your heart that can never be filled. You deserve a beautiful life. You deserve pleasure. You get to enjoy this ride.

Virgo

To call this month a rebirth for you is no exaggeration. You are a snake shedding your old skin, a phoenix rising from the ashes. You feel strongly called toward something new: a new person, a new kind of relationship, a new way of presenting yourself. There will be sparkling, tingling excitement and sadness about what you’re leaving behind. That’s what it means to let yourself transform. Parts of it won’t look pretty. You’re like a baby animal on wobbly legs right now. But soon you’ll be able to run faster and farther than you ever could before. This is a momentous month for you, ushering in about six months of intense new energies. Learn to listen to your inner senses, that gut feeling that tells you when you want to open up and trust and when you’re better off backing away. Don’t worry about explaining those decisions to anyone else. Do what you need to do for yourself, for building a life that makes you feel warm and shivery and capable. Be gentle with yourself through this transitional time, and remember that you’re in a key time of change. Your choices matter. Choose with your heart, and your strongest vision for a better world.

Libra

Something is changing for you, but it’s still beneath the surface. This is a month of waiting and sensing into the possible shape of your future. You may feel less social than usual, and more sensitive any situation where you’re called on to smooth over tension. Your inner life is incredibly rich right now, and the more time you can spend dreaming and scheming, the more restored you’ll feel. If your relationships require you to make decisions right now (anything from “Do we buy land together?” to “Do you want to go out to eat tonight?”), take some time to think so you’re not being guided by fear (“What if you break up with me and we own property together?” “What if I hate the restaurant and am a bad date?”) or illusions (“If we buy land we’re guaranteed never to grow apart.” “Going out to dinner will be a sexy adventure just like when we first met.”). Stay grounded, keep it balanced, and grab some solo time to sort out the mysterious messages you’re getting about the future.

Scorpio

Scorpio is known for being good with secrets: good at keeping them, good at unearthing them, and sometimes good at having them for no particular reason. What secrets are important to you? Are they yours, or someone else’s? Do you keep them secret to protect someone, or do you just figure no one could understand or help if they knew? This month is all about letting secrets go. Sort through them like you would your old clothes, and make some careful judgments about what you really need to hold on to. Be responsible, be fair, and remember that what you decide to share can help you feel lighter, freer, and much closer to the ones you share them with. What feels painful to you could be a gift when you share it with someone who loves you.

Sagittarius

Oh, bright-hearted wanderer. The world wants you to settle down and have something to show for yourself, and you want that too—but not on their terms. You have something important weighing on your heart and you want to get it right; you want to act with the utmost integrity. At the same time, your foundation can feel really shaky right now. Know that you’re doing your best. Recognize that the way you’re restructuring your life and your relationships is important work, and it’s great that you’re taking it seriously. It doesn’t have to feel so heavy if you can remember what’s motivating you. This is the key to this month for you: remember what you’re here to do. Remember what shines through you. Your voice may feel a little hoarse right now, but you can still sing.

Capricorn

You may also be dreaming of an army of lesbian farmers this month, but your dreams have a decidedly different flavor. With your ruling planet Saturn involved in her final clash with Neptune, this is a time of incredibly longing for that queer commune that hasn’t yet happened, that deep love that won’t fade, that best friend who moved across the country and broke your heart—and of recognition that we’re all kind of stuck doing what we’ve got to do. Try to make peace with the limitations of time and space. Resist the temptation to brood. You’re much better off traveling to visit old loves and new. If you can’t travel, gather who you can to cultivate your garden with you (ideally in some short shorts and tall boots), and make care packages of herbal remedies to mail to sweeties near and far.

Aquarius

Though you may feel things deeply, you usually take a philosophical approach when people disappoint you. What hurts worse is being misunderstood. Deep down, you may worry that you don’t quite know how to connect the way everyone else seems to: spontaneously, warmly, gracefully. This month helps you confront, and move past, any illusions you have about what you need to talk like, look like, or do in order to feel loved. Here’s the truth: your way doesn’t need to look like anyone else’s way. Being understood isn’t nearly as important as being appreciated. Let your mysteries be your calling card; don’t work too hard making sure everyone knows what you’re about. Know that people love you for that unique spark that shines through you when you’re doing what brings you the most joy, and that joy is contagious.

Pisces

This is a big month for you. The eclipses affect you where you live: your core sense of self, and your most committed relationships. Expect a lot to be shifting around you. Especially in your intimacies, this is a good time to face your fears and examine the stories you tell yourself. Are you secretly convinced someone’s going to leave you? Have you been guarding your heart by telling yourself to enjoy it while it lasts? Whatever fear or insecurity is subtly guiding your actions, now’s the time to put it to the test. Whatever you discover, you’ll be able to move forward with a clearer heart. While you’re doing this brave emotional work, commit to being responsible to yourself, first. Stop fussing about everyone else and figure out what you really need—then act on it.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!