FRIDAY OPEN THREAD: I Am Milking Every G.D. Second of Halloween

A.E. Osworth —
Oct 31, 2014
COMMENT

Welcome to the Friday Open Thread, where we process our weekly feelings together in the comments until they come out as rainbow apple cider and/or conversations between the coolest internet wierdos ever. This Friday is a special Friday, of course, BECAUSE IT IS HALLOWEEN OH GOD SO EXCITING HALLOWEEN HALLOWEEN HALLOWEEN.

Did you know when you type Halloween that many times in a row it starts to look like a non-word? Halloween is basically my Christmas. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I like Christmas too. But Halloween is my favorite. And for three years running, I have moved on October 31st. So for three entire years I have not been able to partake in what is essentially the best damn holiday in the history of all holidays. Until this year. This year, I moved in August. And I won’t move again for another three years, so that means the next three Halloweens are intact. Starting with this one. Now, when I first asked to do this Open Thread, I asked to do it as “it’s Halloween and I still don’t have my shit together,” because I figured I know myself pretty well and that sounded like a true possibility. Turns out I didn’t know myself well enough, because after being deprived of Halloween for three years, I WAS SO READY SO FAST OH GOD HALLOWEEN. I ordered my costume a month in advance and still paid expedited shipping, that’s how ready I was. I’ve also been watching Nightmare Before Christmas on repeat since October 1st, just FYI.

So instead, I am here to tell you how I ran errands in my costume yesterday, because like a small child I could not wait until today to put the costume on. The Illustrious Stef Schwartz came over and took pictures of me doing this. Just for you.

ali-unicorn-1

First I wanted to go get Halloween Candy because all the children in my building are having a Haunted Lobby Party and I want them to get all hopped up on sugar while I get nostalgic for the good ole days. But then I went to Morton Williams and was v. v. disappointed in their selection.

THESE ARE NOT THE CANDIES YOU ARE LOOKING FOR.
THESE ARE NOT THE CANDIES YOU ARE LOOKING FOR.

So then we decided to go to Duane Reade to get candy, but on the way to the Duane Reade there lies my favorite book store (Book Culture, in case you are curious). So clearly I had to stop in and look for this book that I’d read about and wanted to purchase and read and love forever. At first I couldn’t find it and it was shaping up to be a v. disappointing morning, but then they came through for me.

ali-unicorn-3

The two things I love most in the world are books and Halloween, so I was into it. I told the cashier that this was the best because I was dressed as a unicorn. Stef said that I reminded her of a three year old running around telling everyone I was a princess.

We finally found the acceptable Halloween candy at the Duane Reade and everything was fabulous, except for the Duane Reade employee who asked if he could pull my tail, to which I replied “No thank you” like a v. polite unicorn.

ali-unicorn-4

And then we walked by Tom’s Restaurant and Stef said, “I need to take a picture of you walking by Tom’s dressed as a unicorn. Just do this for me.”

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ali-unicorn-5

None of these photos were taken on October 31st. They were all taken on October 30th. And when Halloween is over, y’all are gonna hafta pry me out of this unicorn costume like one pries a clam out of a shell (I assume one pries clams out of shells, IDK, I’m allergic to clams and also a vegetarian).

I also want you to know that I come by this insane love for Halloween honestly, so here are two photos of what my parents did this year for Halloween. I gave my car to them when I moved to the city, so it looks like they found a use for it.

alis-dad-halloween

alis-parents-halloween

I super love my parents.

So what about you? What are you doing for Halloween this year? PLEASE SHOW ME PHOTOS OF YOUR COSTUMES OH GOD OH GOD PLEASE. Also what other thoughts and feelings have you felt and had this week? I’m totally cool chatting to y’all about non-Halloween things also, I just like chatting to y’all because y’all are wonderful people.


How To Post A Photo In The Comments:

1. Find a photo!This is the easy part. Find a photo on the web, right click (on a Mac, control+click), hit “Copy Image URL” and then…

2. Code it in to your comment! Use the following code, and use a DIRECT LINK to the image. Your image link should end in .JPG or .GIF or .PNG or .CallMeWhateverYouWant even. I don’t care, but it should be an image suffix!

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If you need to upload the photo you love from your computer, try using imgur. To learn more, check out Ali’s step-by-step guide.

How To Post A Video In The Comments, Too:

1. Find a video on YouTube or Vimeo or WHATEVER and click “embed.” Copy that code, but first make sure it’s for 640px wide or less. If your player is too large, it will not display properly.

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3. Go forth and jam.


If you want more comment snazziness, I wrote a two-part tutorial a while back on HTML you can use in comments.

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A.E. Osworth

A.E. Osworth is part-time Faculty at The New School, where they teach undergraduates the art of digital storytelling. Their novel, We Are Watching Eliza Bright, about a game developer dealing with harassment (and narrated collectively by a fictional subreddit), is forthcoming from Grand Central Publishing (April 2021) and is available for pre-order now. They have an eight-year freelancing career and you can find their work on Autostraddle (where they used to be the Geekery Editor), Guernica, Quartz, Electric Lit, Paper Darts, Mashable, and drDoctor, among others.

A.E. Osworth has written 542 articles for us.

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