Lindsay Lohan Unlocks the Dark Secret of Sam Ronson’s Twitter Silence

Lindsay-Sam-happy-daysLINDSAY LOHAN: Lindsay Lohan has feelings again and once again, 140 characters just ain’t enough, she needs 280. If you’re wondering, as we always are, why Lindsay always @-replies Samantha Ronson, and Sam never @-replies Lindsay (I’m imagining my Mom reading this very serious analysis of twitter/celebrity love affairs and wondering why I spent all that money on college tuition, although really, is this so different from The Canterbury Tales, I think not), well, Lindsay says that Samro’s family is standing between them. It’s like Romeo and Juliet! Anyhow, clearly we once wrote this twitter-oversharing off as an emotional breakup, but the worse it gets, the more we can blame something a little less complicated: Many Overshare Cocktails. What is an Overshare Cocktail, you ask?  Alcohol + Uppers (amphetamines, cocaine).

See for yourself:

Picture 3Personally I hate Samantha’s brilliance too, because that seems a likely reason why she refuses to engage in public emotional fights, which would be much more interesting for us to witness. Also, Samantha Ronson can’t even spell words, so let’s not get ahead of ourselves here, re: brilliance.

HEROESClaire’s Lesbian Kiss on Heroes is delightful!: “But let’s get down to brass tacks, shall we?. This episode is the beginning of lesbianism on Heroes – not just one kiss, but an entire LESBIAN ARC, okay? Last night was only the beginning.” (@i09)

TUESDAY TELEVISIONARY: The Week Tampax Sponsored Our Gayest Moment & Hilary Duff Wore Many Hats! (@autostraddle)

SISTER SPIT: Sister Spit’s Next Generation goes on the road – Laneia caught them in Phoenix, so stay on the edge of your seat ‘because we’ll be publishing her review and interviews with the whole group within the next 24 hours! (@afterellen)

BARBIE: Bet you didn’t know that flickr was a hotbed of lesbian sexual scenarios. These barbies are doing things very similar to what my barbies did. Just saying. Alternative & Lesbian Barbie Art and more lesbian barbies here. (@cityrag)

barbie-sex-2

PROP 8: Jordan Catalano can read now. He read Prop 8 and he didn’t like it either: Jared Leto Gets Fired Up Over Gay Rights. (@ew)

TATU: t.a.t.u makes the list of the most sexually explicit music videos ever. (@nme)

LETTERMAN: Was David Letterman Really a Predator?: “Birkitt, while lovely, wasn’t even your typical office femme fatale. Letterman saw something in her—whether a similar comic sensibility, or just a good-natured foil—which means she’d likely have landed on the air in any event.” (@nymag)

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Riese

Riese is the 41-year-old Co-Founder of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3238 articles for us.

9 Comments

    • When I first looked at Autostraddle today I saw this headline and was more excited about it than maybe anything else ever. I am glad that I am not the only one for whom their relationship is really disproportionately significant.

    • I remember some of these videos scaring the hell out of me when I was younger. If they had all been like the Placebo video, I would not have wanted to change the channel like I had to when NIN or Marilyn Manson came on.

  1. Clearly, I should have spent less of my youth playing with Hotwheels and more time playing with Barbies.

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