19 Horrifying Thanksgiving Dinner Ideas From Vintage Food Ads

Riese —

Nov 21, 2012

Ahhh, it wouldn’t be Thanksgiving without a pack of cigarettes and some hearty Spam Birds, would it? Let’s dig in!

19 Strange Thanksgiving Dinner Ideas From Vintage Ads:

1. Old Gold Cigarettes w/Turkey

2. Holiday Vegetable Loaf With Apple Rings, Mashed Potatoes and “Cranberry Turkey”

3. Hot Dr. Pepper Cocktails

4. SPAM Birds

5. Mayonaise, Jell-O & Cranberry Sauce Candles

6. Mayonnaise On All The Things

7. Butter On All The Things

8. Cigarettes With All The Things

9. Beer with All The Things = Freedom

10. Banquet Frozen Thanksgiving TV Dinner

11. Orange Mallow Yam Yums

12. Duck in a Box

13. Clear Mushroom Soup With Whipped Cream

14. Frozen Jellied Turkey Vegetable Salad

Frozen-Turkey — via flickr.com/photos/charmandpoise

15. Bugles, Whistles and Daisy’s Trim-a-Tree Dip

16. Pumpkin Pie With Black Splotches Of Flavor Magic

17. Cranberry Surprise

Eat-Mor Cranberry Booklet, c1940 — Eat-Mor Cranberry Booklet, circa 1940, via flickr.com/photos/alsis35/

18. Leftover Turkey WIth Mayonaise and Jell-O

Clearly, what all this proves is that AMERICA MAKES THE BEST OF EVERYTHING! I mean, look at this guy:

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Riese

Riese is the co-founder of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker and LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York, and now lives in Los Angeles. Follow her on twitter and instagram.