40 Ways to Eat Your Greens In A House With A Mouse

Hello and welcome to this new thing we’re trying out where we help you figure out what you’re gonna put in your mouth this week. Some of these are recipes we’ve tried, some of these are recipes we’re looking forward to trying, all of them are fucking delicious. Tell us what you want to put in your piehole or suggest your own recipes, and next week we’ll check in and talk about which things we made, which things we loved, and which things have changed us irreversibly as people. Last week, we ate eggplants. 

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This time last week, you were imbibing green beer, green jello shots, green cupcakes, and that one totally tasteless dessert with kale in it that your vegan gluten-free friend made. Now that some green is starting to show itself in the outside world (and, in my case, the bottle of Seagram’s that one of my neighbors apparently left inside a snowbank), it’s time to get some greens into your gut. But it’s still a little chilly out, and so there are no salads or smoothies here; this is all hearty food that will make a warm, filling lunch or dinner. Are you ready? You’re not ready.

1. Spiced Lentil, Sweet Potato & Kale Whole Wheat Pockets

2. Braised Lentils with Winter Greens and a Fried Egg

3. One Pot Stovetop Creamy Kale Mac and Cheese

4. Miso-Creamed Kale and Mushrooms with Tofu

Rachel: This recipe contains virtually everything I want to eat in the world. I am concerned that this recipe is actually a trap set for me by an enemy. They’ll launch their attack while I’m creaming the kale or something. I’m nervous but it looks too good not to try.

5. Kale Gratin with Italian Sausage

6. Persian Herb Quiche with Chard and Kale

7. Fennel, Mushroom, And Kale Sandwich

 8. Spinach and Kale Tortilla

9. Butternut Squash and Bacon Pizza

10. Chicken and Waffles with Greens

11. Sautéed Collard Greens with Bacon

12. Chicken and Greens with Wine and Bacon

13. Collard Greens Jiaozi (Chinese Dumplings)

14. Carrot Soup With Tangled Collard Greens and Dukkah

Rachel: I used to work at a Middle Eastern cafe that had lots of great house-made spices, and dukkah was one of my favorites. Now that I’ve moved to a totally different area I had given up on being able to eat dukkah-spiced things in my life, but with this recipe my optimism is renewed!

15. Creamed Collard Greens With Pimentón Dulce

16. Collard Greens and Sweet Corn Buttermilk Cakes With Sumac-Sour Cream

17. Red Curry Coconut Braised Collards

18. Spinach and Chickpeas

Rachel: I have loved this recipe for so long. It is the Jack to my Rose, the Ruth to my Idgie. Whenever I remember it exists I get mad at myself for not eating it at that exact moment. When I make this I usually skip a few of the fussier steps — I never have the patience to cook something in a pan, take it out of the pan, and then put it back in the pan later – but it’s never turned out poorly. I want cherubs to lovingly spoon this recipe into my mouth while I recline on a divan.

19. Spicy Sausage, Mustard Greens and Cauliflower

20. Mustard Greens Galette

21. Garlicky Greens with Microwave Polenta

22. Steamed Wild Salmon with Mizuna, Mustard Greens, Soy Sauce and Ginger

23. Vegetable Soup with Mustard Greens and Black Lentils

24. Socca with Swiss Brown Mushrooms and Labneh

25. Palak Paneer

26. Polenta Crust Creamed Spinach Tart

27. Tarta Szpinakowa

28. Gnocchi Verde

29. Parmesan Broth with Kale and White Beans

30. Swiss Chard and Sweet Potato Gratin

31. Leek, Corn and Chard Flatbread with Goat Cheese

32. Chickpea & Rice Soup With A Little Kale

Rachel: This soup is the most comforting, creamy, filling thing, and it’s perfect for the gross, rainy, cold days that often characterize March and April. You will not regret putting this in your mouth.

33. The Best Baked Spinach

34. Indonesian Kale and Tempe Curry

35. Sweet and Sour Swiss Chard with Crispy Prosciutto

36. Salmon, Swiss Chard and Egg Skillet

37. Sweet Potato Corn Chowder with Red Kale

38. Swiss Chard with Tahini Yogurt Sauce and Buttered Pine Nuts

39. Kale and Feta Egg Bake

Laneia: This recipe is perfect for when you have leftover pasta sauce and a handful of kale with no real purpose. It’s essentially like a lasagna, but the noodles are replaced with sauteed kale. The egg on top is pretty much optional, if you’re not into that sort of thing, but I’m really into that sort of thing, so. This recipe also freezes really well — without the egg of course. You can thaw it overnight in the fridge, or cook it from frozen at at 350, covered, for maybe 20 minutes, before adding the egg.

40. Braised Coconut Spinach with Chickpeas and Lemon

Laneia: I think I could eat this seven days a week. The sweet potato is optional, but so good. It’s also ridiculous over brown rice. A tip though — if you plan on having leftovers, do not add spinach to the entire dish at once. Remove what you know you want to save and add spinach to that portion before you reheat it. Otherwise the spinach becomes a sad, slimy mess. This dish also works with kale!

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Rachel

Originally from Boston, MA, Rachel now lives in the Midwest. Topics dear to her heart include bisexuality, The X-Files and tacos. Her favorite Ciara video is probably "Ride," but if you're only going to watch one, she recommends "Like A Boy." You can follow her on twitter and instagram.

Rachel has written 1141 articles for us.

34 Comments

      • yesssssss

        megan felt like the sweet potato was “too much” but i was too busy shoveling it into my face to ask her to explain herself.

  4. These recipes look fantastic! I love kale and other winter greens so much it hurts. Just so you know, number 38, Swiss Chard with Tahini Yogurt Sauce and Buttered Pine Nuts, should be credited to Yotam Ottolenghi…it’s from his book Jerusalem.

    • it’s clearly credited to him within the source! since his book isn’t online, people who don’t own it wouldn’t be able to cook the recipe, which would make listing it here frustrating for them.

  5. YUM I want to make all of these recipes and eat them this is so bad I need to stop my habit of spending hours cooking instead of studying or homework.But greens? Fried eggs?? CHEESE? BACON!?!? How can I resist these recipes?

  7. i just made an account and everything SO THAT i could express my deepest gratitude and excitement re: this post. it is so epic and wonderful. i am going to hit my CSA box so hard this week. no more salads for this moi! thanks thanks!

  8. I’m not sure how I feel about the inclusion of the word “mouse” in the title. It was kinda triggering.

  11. My mouth is watering right now. I basically want to eat all of the meat-free dishes all at once. Especially that spinach and chickpea one. Om nom nom.

  12. pro tip, trader joe’s sells dukkah and it is delicious with every food you could ever want to eat.

  13. number 10 just confuses me.
    the greens look tasty, and as a vego i can understand that some people eat chicken.
    but the waffle?
    why a waffle with chicken?
    is this some sort of abstract art? that’s how it feels to me.

    i assume it’s an American thing.

    • My thoughts also. I’ve only ever known waffles to be sweet and come with some kind of syrup and probably strawberries. I’m assuming this is like the time I found out that ‘biscuits’ in the US are not necessarily sweet ginger snaps and all the times I’d read American classics as a child and been baffled at the though of eating them with gravy made a bit more sense.

  14. I’m home sick today, I was just thinking about trying to haul myself off the couch because I didn’t think I could make much with what I’ve got and I’ve just realised that I have all the ingredients for chickpeas and spinach and that it is exactly what I feel like for dinner. Delicious easy food + not having to leave the house. AS wins.

    • Having now eaten this, I can confirm that cherubs lovingly spooning it into my mouth would be totally appropriate and the description was not at all hyperbolic. I’m considering making it again for lunch.

  15. Ok so i am a big fan of brussel sprouts with bacon. As a side with a roast dinner or made into bubble and squeak the next day. Now those of you not from Britain/Ireland may be saying “what is this squeaking bubble” Basically you take all leftover veg from a roast dinner, carrots, broccoli, sprouts and roast potato, you put it in a frying pan (skillet) and you mash it so it becomes one big cake. Make little wells in it and pop eggs in them, slap a lid on and let them cook-like huevos rancheros- It’s amazing and uses up leftovers.

  16. Wow, what a list. I’m bookmarking it for (especially, but not exclusive to) when my kale gets big enough. I urge EVERYONE to try the coconut milk spinach one at the end of the list. It’s amaze-ing, and one of my favourite things to eat (also works with chard!) And go the whole hog at least once and serve it with the roasted sweet potato. Such a great combination.

  19. Of all the recipes I add kale to, why have I never put it in my mac’n’cheese?! Thank you for showing me the error of my ways.

  20. ugh I’ve been dreaming about everything in this post since it came out. Finally made #36 as a scramble and I’m pretty sure I can die happy now.

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