The Best Show to Watch After Watching a Marathon of Movies About Teenagers With Babies and Drinking Problems: Drop Dead Diva (Episode 105: Lost and Found)
by Intern Lily
On this week’s episode of Drop Dead Diva, Jane finds out that it is her 32nd birthday. This, of course, is a bit of a problem as Deb was only 24 when she died meaning her sudden reincarnation has aged her eight years. To make matters worse, her arch nemesis Kim has replaced her in the case that she was supposed to work on with her past life fiancé, Grayson. To keep the bad birthday going, Jane continues to dig her own grave when she decides to fight for more than what the state offered as compensation to a wrongly accused convict. She loses the case and her client no longer will receive any money. But Jane is persistent and ends up finding a flaw in the system taking the District Attorney’s office to court for neglect—eventually winning $100,000 for her client.
At the end of the day, Jane’s friends and co-workers throw her a surprise birthday party where she sings karaoke and learns that with her new body comes a new, surprisingly beautiful, voice. She sings the song that used to be Deb and Grayson’s “song” and locks eyes with Grayson as she sings it. It’s a bit cheesy, but leaves a nice cliffhanger for next week’s episode which promises a range of emotions for us viewers as we watch Jane attempt to tell Grayson who she really is. I can’t wait!
The Tinkerbell Hot on My Trail Award for Intervention
(by Tinkerbell)
hello autostraddle this is tinkerbell. intervention was very strange tonight and made me worried for the futures of drug addicts everywhere because they have ken seely’s number and will not fall for this shit anymore.
this week joey was a tattoo artist who gave tattoos while on heroin which is special and i will never have a tattoo even though i was going to get one that said “I love Wino and/or littlefoot” but now i am scared of the SMACK. once again there is premature reproduction.
there was a big car chase and lots of cell phone calls at 9:30 there was an intervention which has never happened before i didn’t even have time to look at all of joey’s family photos. at the end he got better i think i had french fries.
psa: if you are spending $200 a day on drugs please consider investing in autostraddle. it is better than drugs b/c of the double bottom line.
this is like the tom green show or the ali g show which was on before i was born. the addicts are like oh hello, i was expecting this and then he ran down the hallway which was an exciting chase scene like in the movies with cars that blow up that i am not allowed to see.
because i have a lazy eye i could not see the subtitles when joey’s dad spoke on a southern accent.
the moral of the story is that joey has a friend named pizza and ken seely can withstand all kinds of weather and before you get a tattoo make sure there are no cameras around.
who would name their kid PIZZA. speaking of i love pizza
The ‘Where Do They Find These People?’ (or, The Swan Ate My Baby!) Award: Toddlers & Tiaras
(by Laneia)
Toddlers & Tiaras [henceforth to be known as T&T] is the kind of show you watch to make your life seem more normal. Or, if you happen to be living in the same city as some of the featured “Pageant Dads”, and you happen to be a gay man, it might also be the kind of show you watch to find your next closet case friend. Either way, I am not here to judge you. I watch for the comforting southern accents and immense level of what-the-fuckage!
The most recent show treated us to the West Virginia Walk of Fame and featured Jayla (6 yrs) and her father, Dwayne; Riley (6 yrs) and her mother, Monica; and Hannah (7 yrs) and her mother, Ashley. There is so very much I could say about Dwayne, but I’m going to start and stop at how mesmerizing it was to watch him coach Jayla through her routine during the pageant. It was mesmerizing, you guys. Seriously. I just sat there with my mouth hanging open.
Riley and Monica teach us the importance of PERSONALITY. Riley has a lot of PERSONALITY and her PERSONALITY just shines shines shines. PERSONALITY! Get some! But seriously, do you know what’s the best thing about Riley? She loves animals. Loves them! She licks her mother like a lizard when it’s time to kiss goodbye! She hops like a baby bunny and crawls around like a chipmunk and she communicates with all kinds of species! I love her. I want to go on a nature walk with her and talk to frogs. If I was a 6 year old, she’d be my very best friend.
Hannah, who’s been out of the pageant circuit for a couple of years, is a total package girl. She is the total package. The total glitz package, if you will. Do you understand? She is where it’s at! The Package. She has it. She also drinks coffee, which’s cool — I, too, drink coffee. Hannah does a fairly awesome Austin Powers routine complete with a blue velvet costume, chunky black glasses and a rowr! kitty scratch move that pretty much seals the deal.
Are you watching T&T? Did you happen to meet Tootie from a previous episode? If you missed Tootie, I feel so sorry for you! Almost as sorry as I feel if you missed this week’s Dwayne. Be sure to catch the next episode because it looks like so much win! Are they in Texas? Georgia? I can’t tell but trust me, it’ll be good. These girls look like professionals.
I was going to talk about Summer Heights High and Party Down this week but there is just too much going on! You’ll just have to tune in (ha! get it? sigh…) every week to see when and if I ever get around to doing that.
‘Tron out!
