Letter From Your Editors

Hello Egg Nogs!

Wow, this month really pushed the limit of what one month on earth could contain, huh? But speaking of what the world can contain — we are so thankful for your love and support over this past year and heading into next. We would not be here were it not for you. We are so, so, so grateful. Thank you! PLEASE NEVER LEAVE US. Thanks.

It’s 7pm on New Years Eve and I’m still not sure where to go with this letter but I need to decide soon, like in the next ten minutes? I had some ideas like; talking about how this year has been so fucking weird!!, saying something hopeful about next year, sharing business-related joys and frustrations, broadly surveying some Autostraddle-related goals, delivering some online media realness, diving into the whole AfterEllen saga — I can’t decide. There’s too much. I guess that’s kind of how this year has been, huh?

There’s an ongoing bit in Season Two of The Good Fight where Diane Lockhart, a powerful lawyer played by my wife Christine Baranski, keeps watching a news show reporting absurd stories like “Donald Trump is bringing goats to a summit in Germany” or “Donald Trump is keeping pigs in the Map Room.” I was initially skeptical of this bit. The Good Fight is about a very financially privileged class of human beings — although as lawyers they’re also in a profession profoundly impacted by government policy — which’s why I was surprised it chose to really dig in and address the cognitive dissonance and wide-scale gaslighting that has made everyone feel completely out of whack. The bit stuck with me. I keep thinking about it. We’re at a point now where so many people are being attacked or disenfranchised by this administration that for those of us not literally caged or deported, continuing to note its impact on our everyday mental health feels self-indulgent at best. I mean the actual planet is being destroyed and quickly, you know? What’s our everyday mental health compared to all that! I am an insane person who has felt more and more insane every day, especially since September 28th. I knew that these terrible racist xenophobic ideas were popular and none of that surprises me, yet I’m somehow consistently surprised that this man is still president? What do we do with this? With this strange year?

On a personal level, for me and perhaps also for you, this year has contained moments of joy and exhilaration, unexpected opportunities, beautiful connections. There’s been great food and beautiful art and infectious music and touching thirst traps and cute texts and killer outfits great sex and very good jokes and incredible friends and literal rays of sunshine and there have been dogs. I have written things I’m incredibly proud of. But the world has been frustrating and strange, too.

“It’s all right that the world is crazy,” Diane Lockhart eventually concludes, on The Good Fight. “as long as I make my little corner of the world sane.” I don’t think she’s totally right about that — I think we do have an obligation to the rest of the world, far beyond our corner. But… I am so grateful for this little corner we have right here where most of the time, things do make sense. Where I think we’ve all been a little gentler with each other than in years past, even. A website that still feels like a community when most websites have vacated in favor of a curated Social Media Experience. This place where there’s compassion and love and beauty and community and writing that managed to turn nihilism into something resembling courage. Where there was space to find delight in the dating activities of Kristen Stewart or what Lena Waithe wore to the Met Ball or the benefits of eating breakfast pasta, to explore identity and share memes and tell each other that we’re all okay.

We started 2017 kicking and screaming, yearning to fight back, then found ourselves repeatedly shocked by how far things could go, and farther still. In 2018, it seemed like a miracle that anybody still knew how to kick or scream, like everything in our personal lives we’d held our breaths through in 2017 exhaled all at once, for better or for worse. But I do feel like we’ve all been through a reckoning somehow, been forced to really look at ourselves in unexpected ways, truly measure what we’re capable of. We might be broken but we’re stronger than before.

I think we understand the fight now, what it will look like out there and what it will look like inside us. How much space we need for the outside and how much for the inside. I think we are prepared to create a fulfilling 2019 for ourselves, maybe even a good one. I feel realistic about it, you know? I feel like we have the tools and they won’t dismantle the master’s house but they have a beautiful backyard and we’re planning a really incredible camp there.

There’s a poem by Dana Levin called Letter to GC, which contains lines she culled from letters she’d written to a poet named G.C., and it’s three stanzas, technically. Here’s the first one:

I say most sincerely and desperately, HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Having rowed a little farther away from the cliff
Which is my kind of religion
Adrift in the darkness but readying oars
How can there be too many stars and hands, I ask you

In conclusion, I love you all and there can never be too many stars or too many hands. Not ever.

Riese

Co-signed by Laneia / Rachel / Heather / Carmen

---

Top 10 Most Popular Posts From November 2018

These posts were hella popular last month.

1. Rejoice, Rejoice! Kristen Stewart Will Star in the Lesbian Christmas Rom-Com of Your Wildest Holigay Dreams!, by Heather
2. Netflix’s “She-Ra and the Princesses of Power” Is the Gay Agenda, by Heather
3. This Is Literally How We Do It: Lesbian Sex Positions 101, by Alyssa
4. The 16 Best Lesbian and Bisexual TV Couples of 2018, by Heather
5. Hulu’s “The Bisexual” Is Here to Make Every Queer a Little Uncomfortable, by Heather
6. The Bisexual Bob: A Bold Haircut for a Beautiful Future, by Riese
7. November 2018 Queer Horoscopes: Keep Paying Attention, Start Dreaming Big, by Corinna
8. Monday Roundtable: The Lesbian Style Clichés We’ll Never Give Up, by the Team,
9. Is She a Lesbian or Just From the Midwest?, by Molly Priddy
10. No Filter: Emily Hampshire and Teddy Geiger Got Engaged So At Least There’s That, by Stef

---

Nine Important Excerpts From Editorial Conversations

Riese: I will die on the Harlots hill
it only has 7 reviews on Rotten Tomatoes but idc
Rachel: Harlots is genuinely very good
Riese: i’m honestly BAFFLED why Harlots wasn’t on other lists
Heather: You already said why though! In your blurb!
Rachel: no one I know IRL watches it
I honestly feel hurt
Riese: it’s a period drama! howard’s end was on all the lists! they are all hurting me and also missing out on some very important Nancy Birch fantasies
Rachel: can you imagine going back in time and telling your past self that a woman was fully going to have sex with liv tyler on a free streaming television show and people would… not watch it
Riese: I CANNOT
Rachel: I know I want nancy birch to make an honest woman out of me

---

Riese: why do all of these websites say that sasha lane came out this year when she has been out since 2015:

I feel like people keep trynna include me in they threesomes bc I'm bi and they think ill do all the work and it'll make their bf amused

— Sasha Lane (@SashaBianca23) February 3, 2015

Carmen: I really don’t know, but that tweet is a godsend

---

Laneia: wish i could go back to the precise moment in time when people decided that when a thing they like isn’t explicitly about/for them they must _must_ immediately declare that the thing could technically if anyone would bother taking a minute to think about it also be applicable to _them_
i would slap everyone across the face
“this outfit would also look good on me, a person who doesn’t identify this way.” UH OK KAREN? GREAT?
Heather: :winona-doesnt-journal:
Laneia: EVERYBODY COME APPLAUD KAREN
Rachel: it’s karen’s big day
Laneia: KAREN SAW HERSELF IN SOMETHING TODAY
Heather: *BUT NOT SOMETHING SHE ID’S AS*
Laneia: Y’ALL COME LOOK AT KAREN OVER HERE CONTAINING FUCKING MULTIDUDES
FCKIN’ MULTITUDINOUS KAREN
i like multidudes i’m leaving it
it’s no space heather, but
Heather: my favorite comment this week was someone on crying therese telling me not to be heteronormative
Laneia: HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA
ohhhh i just laughed like a serial killer on cocaine
thank you

---

Riese: what if the theme was “power lesbians”
Carmen: Get ready for my essay: I Dream of Bette Porter’s Pantsuits And That’s How I Know I’m Gay

---

Carmen: What do we feel about including some tweets from readers about merch in the intro to this merch gift guide?
Mostly I’m thinking about this viral one
It’s super cute and goes with my “this year the top of every holigay wish list is Autostraddle merch” theme! But sometimes people don’t like their tweets published? Anyway! thoughts!
Laneia: i think this is a great idea
if their account is public and what they wrote in their tweet isn’t like super personal, it’s fine
like “my grandmother died yesterday and today my wife left me and i might have gingivitis but at least i have this great shirt from autostraddle” would be too much
Carmen: Once again with the vivid examples! You know how to make a point like no other laneia, and it is literally a joy every time

---

Stef: she does look like she enjoys walking around six blocks of los feliz and getting juice though
i think this is a good match
Riese: oh and she’s friends with all the girls in that obnoxiously beautifully lithe LA lesbian scene
i think i would need a face transplant to hang out with these people
Stef: everything makes sense
i think this is a great relationship for kristen, i hope this girl uses her for fame really transparently
so she can be a style visionary for people i’ve actually heard of
like the way i’m still holding out hope that grimes is only dating elon musk for a trip to mars
Riese: i’ve gotten a lot less out of relationships than a trip to mars so i support it all
Stef: right? i feel like at least two people owe me trips to mars
Carolyn: That long haired girl was with Kristen in [place] the other day
Wednesday specifically
Stef: AND YOU DIDN’T SAY ANYTHING???
carolyn i thought we were friends
Carolyn: I know I’m sorry!!
Stef: wow
this is a betrayal
it’s like i don’t even know you
can you give me details and am i allowed to call you “a source”
Riese: props to these girls for bringing home take-out but not in a bag
saving the earth one “no bag” at a time
Stef: i am talking about how they have a lot of hobbies in common like walking around holding juice and food
but were they like holding hands, did they look like a couple?
Carolyn: Unclear
Riese: i don’t think friends hold hands when paparazzi are taking pictures
Stef: i agree, kristen has been very intentional about the way she presents herself to paparazzi
sent u a draft riese
Laneia: i just want to say that i’ve never been prouder to work here, thank you
Stef: this is low hanging fruit but is their ship name going to be stinkin
Riese: wow

---

Laneia: riese you are taking absolutely zero shit from anyone today and i just want you to know that i support it and love you
will etch “lol do u truly think I didn’t consider that” on your tombstone myself
Riese: THANK YOU LANEIA

---

Laneia: hey carmen what’s happening with the lena waithe piece
Riese: oh wow remember the l word fashion thing!
i was gonna do
Laneia: i feel like i’ve been in a coma for the past two months so if i ask a question i’ve already asked or should know the answer to, pls forgive!
i’m like your hilarious aunt who has dementia and gives you old toothpaste for your birthday

---

Laneia: if [person]’s post doesn’t come in today i’m going to tattoo my name on her face tonight
Rachel: I have unfortunate news which is [person’s post] is absolutely not coming in
I know this in my bones
Laneia: I DO NOT HAVE TIME TO DO A STICK AND POKE TODAY
Rachel: listen I know

---

Riese: i feel like i missed a batch of roundtables b/c i was traveling or in a cave the day they were posted or something
Laneia: i have missed so fucking many i want to die or shave my head and break a window with an umbrella
Carmen: ???? Don’t do those things.
We are all hanging on best we can.

---

Vanessa: riese
i know we can’t say anything about afterellen in public
but like
Riese: oh! we can now
we got our money
so the non-disparagement clause is no longer relevant to our lives
Vanessa: we can?!?!??!?!
GREAT
Stef: WE CAN?!?!
Riese: yeah the nightmare is over
Vanessa: WOW A NEW DAWN A NEW DAY
Molly: yesssssss
i’ve limited myself to saying it’s “not great!” to dorothy snarker
Carmen: oh man I feel like a lot of shit is about to burn

---

Meet A New Writer!

Get to know some of our newest faces.

June Gehringer, Writer

Twitter: @june_gehringer
Instagram: I’m not really on insta anymore. I’m like, the only gay person I know who’s not on Insta.

What is your favorite kind of sandwich? Any kind with cheese on it!! I also love fried eggs on sandwiches. Do bagels count as sandwiches? If so, then an everything bagel with a giant scoop of scallion cream cheese is my favorite sandwich. Also pizza, which is, in my opinion, an open faced sandwich.

Describe the worst date you’ve ever been on. One of my first dates with my girlfriend. I forget where I parked the car and we had to walk around for like an hour and a half in the freezing cold looking for it. I get embarrassed very easily and by the time we found the car I was sure she’d never want to see me again. Luckily for me, things worked out completely fine.

What’s something you’ve been really proud of lately? My book came out in October and despite having complicated feelings about it, I’m really proud of myself for doing it and following through on it, and trying to give it the best life it can have! Also I made a really yummy banana bread for my friends the other day, so there’s that too.

If you could only use one emoji for the rest of your life, what would it be?  🖤, definitely. I’ll always be a goth at heart.

---

---

SOME CONSERVATIONS REGARDING POTENTIAL FUTURE THEME ISSUES

Special note that a lot of us are depressives and we cope with this darkness by joking about it with reckless abandon. If that kind of talk bothers you, please skip this conversation!!!

Laneia: what if it’s
like, traditions
or
idk just not holidays
Riese: what about Parties
Sarah: Feels too close to birthday
Laneia: yes
sadly
bc my first idea was ‘celebrations’
hahaha what if winter’s theme is TIME IS RUNNING OUT
maybe we could get a good personal essay about climate change
Riese: loving this concept
Sarah: Me too
Love death and the changing of the seasons
Laneia: also! SAD
Riese: The Death Issue
Laneia: seriously imagine the graphic possibilities
Rachel: Death Is Sad: Longform
Laneia: oh i meant S.A.D. but yes
LET’S DO IT LET’S DO A DEATH ISSUE
DEATH AND TAXES
Riese: wowwowowow
i am worried that we might all kill ourselves
Laneia: are you not always worried about that
Sarah: DEATH DEATH DEATH
color is black
Laneia: THROWING YRSELF OUT A FIRST FLOOR WINDOW
Sarah: Every feature image is no image
Just a black square
Laneia: MURDER OF CROWS AND ALSO EVERYTHING
Sarah: The limit does not exist
Laneia: wait A Murder of Crows and Also Everything is my memoir title i’ve just decided
no one can have that
Sarah: Infinite space
Heather: if we do a death issue i’m just repubbing “we messed up”
Rachel: HEATHER
Heather: :dobby:
Riese: can we also do a list of every way each editor has threatened to kill [my ex-girlfriend]
Heather: 100 ways me and — yes that’s what i was going to say
Rachel: that was some of heather and laneia’s finest work at this establishment
Sarah: Hahahhaha
Rachel: and it would really be criminal if only the six of us got to see it
Sarah: That exists?!?!
Rachel: it’s sort of a living text
Sarah: I want to see it
Heather: from memory it seems like the main murder ideas involved a lot of drowning
being pushed or sunk into various bodies of water
Rachel: I think someone had some strong energy around pushing her down stairs too
Heather: seems right

[….]

Rachel: these ideas are really kind of hitting the full spectrum of human experience
into it
Carmen: birthday! pride! death!
Riese: i love everybody but we are not doing a death issue!!!!!!!!!
Carmen: hahhahahahahahahahaahahaaha
Laneia: what about murder
what about POISON
omg
omg
omg
what if
we had a theme
dedicated
to
men
and it would just be heather going like “idk why this guy is still talking!!” or me not jumping
Rachel: a superhero comic about heather making men cry on the street
Heather: a video series where i humiliate a man every time i leave my house
last week i scared a man so bad he dropped his food truck platter in the street and ran off. i need to put a camera on my bike helmet.
Rachel: I would pay for this subscription service
Carmen: that’s the greatest story!

---

What We’ve Been Reading

Heather: Becoming by Michelle Obama

Molly: Mostly Dead Things by Kristen Arnett

Natalie: To Obama With Love, Joy, Hate and Despair by Jeanne Marie Laskas

Casey: Ancillary Justice by Ann Leckie and I Might Regret This by Abbi Jacobson

Carrie: Becoming by Michelle Obama and Alice Isn’t Dead: A Novel by Joseph Fink

KaeLyn: Bad With Money: The Imperfect Art of Getting Your Financial Sh*t Together by Gaby Dunn

Rachel: In the Woods, by Tana French

Riese: The Fact of a Body, by Alexandria Marzano-Lesnevich

Audrey:Goodbye , Vitamin: A Novel, by Rachel Khong

Laneia:The Incendiaries by R. O. Kwon and The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

Al(aina):Spill: Scenes of Black Feminist Fugitivity by Alexis Pauline Gumbs

Alexis: TRANNY: Confessions of an Infamous Anarchist Sellout by Laura Jane Grace

Stef: Faking It: The Lies Women Tell about Sex – And the Truths They Reveal by Lux Alptraum

June: Violet Energy Ingots by Hoa Nguyen, and Nevada by Imogen Binnie

Carmen: Well-Read Black Girl: Finding Our Stories, Discovering Ourselves
by Glory Edim, Editor

---

MEET AN EDITOR’S PET!

Get to know some of our staff’s pets. Today we’ll get to know more about Heather’s cat, Socks Bobbi Peterson-Hogan!

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Heather Hogan (@heatherannehogan) on Oct 22, 2017 at 10:12am PDT

What’s your favorite food (includes human food)?
Hey! Hey! 🤗🙃🙂🙃🙂🙃🙃 Hey are you my new friend? Hey! Carmen Phillips, my new friend! My mama said, “Socks hey Socks hey Socks Socks Socks Samuel!!” (Sometimes she says my name probably about eleven times because I don’t hear her at first because there’s a lot of squirrels outside or one time I saw a small spider right in this spot or I did hear her, but I didn’t want to, such as when I am on the kitchen counter looking for CHIKIN!!!!) So my mama said Carmen Phillips 🤗 is going to interview you, Socks!

Do you know about CHIKIN!!!, Carmen Phillips? It is white or brown and it smells like CHIKIN!!! It comes in just about every shape and size, sometimes from the kitchen or sometimes the doorbell rings and a man gives us some CHIKIN!!! in a bag and my mama says, “BananaPants, that is none of your business.” But Carmen Phillips, guess what? CHIKIN!!! IS ALWAYS MY BUSINESS.

What’s your most perfect sleeping scenario?
Carmen Phillips, my mama said this interview will be for so many hundreds of my new friends!! Do you think 🙃🙂🙃🙂🙃🙂😉😀😀 they want to DO A PETS TRAINS – which is where they all do pets on me? I like pets on ears and head and chin and back and paws and even belly!!

But listen okay, when it’s time for bed every new friend has to go. I only want to sleep under the covers in between my two mamas and no one else! But I love you! Do you know how to get the man to come to the door with a bag of CHIKIN!!! I love you anyway even if you don’t! Love you love you😊😊🙃😊🙃🙃 love you.

If you could have a home on the beach, near mountains, or in a lush forest, which would you pick and why?
Where does the man with the bag of CHICKIN!!! live do you know? 😍😍😋😋😎🙃

Would you say you’ve seen a ghost?
YES. THERE IS A GHOST CAT IN MY VERY HOUSE! ONLY I SEE HIM! IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE ZOOMIES IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE ZOOM ZOOM ZOOOOOM BODY!!!!!! He lives on the stairs and I think sometimes he boops me on my butt which is exactly where I don’t want to be booped!! I do like to do nose boops though. I wonder about if my one of new one hundred friends wants to do nose boops!

Which fictional cat do you look up to and why?
My mama has a fictional cat called Rhubarb in her video game of Stardew Valley. Sometimes he meows and it SCARES ME. 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃 But I do look up to him because I watch my mama play that game and Rhubarb lives with Lettuce, Cabbage, Kale, Ginger, Sprout, and Celery — and guess what they are? CHIKINS!!!!!

What do you wish you could say to your mom?
Did you know I got an autoimmune disorder? Dr. Glasser who is one of my other friends (but he don’t nose boop) and he always says “Such a lucky boy, such a lucky boy” to me because I was borned under a bucket in the street and if my exact specific mamas hadn’t found me, even if I could’ve made it to old enough to find some food, my autoimmune woulda made me too sick to live.

My mama gives me medicine first thing every single morning for my autoimmunes no matter what and sometimes I do have a little fit about it or spit it out because I hate pills same as I LOVE CHIKIN!! My mama says, “I’m sorry, sweet angel. It’s because I love you.”

I wish I could say what Dr. Glasser says to me. “I know, mama! I’m such a lucky boy, such a lucky boy!”

(Nose boops now??🙂🤗🙃🙃🙃🙃)

View this post on Instagram

Doesn’t matter if I’m gone a week or an hour, he hates it!

A post shared by Heather Hogan (@heatherannehogan) on Jul 29, 2018 at 11:55am PDT

---

SLACKERS

I (me, Heather, hi!) read a lot about productivity this year, especially Slack productivity, and one thing people kept saying over and over is that you can gauge how happy your Slack team members are by what emoji they use in public channels. That’s a dubious method of happiness measurement, of course, but a fun exercise anyway, so I installed a bot to tell me who used the most positive emoji this year. These are the top ten.

Our happiest staff members by emoji use, according to slack:

10. Austen
9. Yvonne
8. Dufrau
7. Carrie
6. Natalie
5. Vanessa
4. Valerie
3. Heather
2. Sarah
1. Carmen

---

New Year New You Retro-Reading

This month’s theme is posts that’ll help you meet your goals for ambitious self-improvement in the New Year.

Autostraddle’s Masters of Sex Cure, by Carolyn (2015) – If your sex life feels stale or otherwise in need of improvement, have I got the thing for you! It can be hard to set aside time to think critically about your sex life, both with activity partners and alone — here’s a road map to doing it.

Be The Change Series, by Kaelyn Rich (2016 – PRESENT) – We are honestly blessed to have such a compassionate and experienced activist like Kaelyn who is committed to getting you ready to change the world your damn self with posts on topics including getting started as a community organizer, tabling, marching and planning activist meetings. This series is so good that it led to Kaelyn getting an actual book deal!

The Doing the Damn Thing Series, by Heather Hogan (2018 – 2019) – An unpopular hill I wouldn’t mind dying on (as, please do note, a depressive with chronic pain, chronic fatigue syndrome and ADD) is that it’s actually NOT okay to flake on everything in the name of “self-care” and sometimes we have to just get our shit together and do the damn thing, even though for some of us that means putting in four times as much effort as somebody who doesn’t have similar mental health struggles. Heather is much more gentle than I am about guiding you into a place where this can be possible.

This Queer House Series, by Jenna (2017 – 2018) – Perhaps you’ll want to start at the end with “This Queer House, Vol 10: New Year, Newly Organized Queer House” but the whole series is super useful for homeowners and anybody looking to be the master of their domain. (Another great series for that general state of mind is Cee’s This Is How We Do It.)

For Your Consideration, by Kayla (2018) – If your life is at a place where making things better feels insurmountable and treading water feels downright inspirational — consider this exceptional series! Filled with important tips for living your “best life.”

---

Five Posts Rachel Can’t Believe You Motherf*ckers Didn’t Read Last Month

The Doing the Damn Thing Series, by Heather Hogan

Have y’all ever sat up wrapped in a blanket in the dark of night and wondered how Heather Hogan does it? It being writing a truly unreal amount of content for Autostraddle dot com and editing, ideating, managing or otherwise midwifing a significant percentage of the rest of it, managing a beautiful apartment-sized menagerie of rescued animals, watching every gay-adjacent TV show known to woman, exercising regularly, volunteering for causes she cares about in her free time, and also remaining the warmest, most constant, most affirming presence on the internet? If you haven’t, you really should, because it’s fucking remarkable, and with this series she is doing you and me and everyone we know the great kindness of sharing with us how. Don’t let yourself miss out!

This Is Us Breaks New Ground with Tess Pearson’s Coming Out Storyline, by Carmen Phillips

Have you noticed how phenomenal the work of our TV Team has been this year? They’ve been on top of lesbian/bi/queer characters and storylines in one of the gayest years TV has seen; they’ve kept you abreast with recaps, Boobs Tube updates, on-point lists, and also incredible works of criticism and analysis like this. I don’t watch This Is Us, but Carmen’s exploration of how this episode functions and what it gave viewers is so great that I feel emotional about it anyway.

Navigating Love, Loss and Life as an Interfaith Queer Couple, by J.E. Reich

It’s almost impossible to know what to write or to say after a tragedy, and the shooting at the Tree of Life Synagogue is no exception; but this beautiful, difficult essay about the moments that contextualized the news in one couple’s life is part of the conversation that’s vital and precious.

The Astraea Lesbian Foundation for Justice Is Crushing It in 2018, by Riese

If you don’t already know about the Astraea Lesbian Foundation for Justice — “the world’s only foundation exclusively dedicated to supporting LGBTQI organizations both in the U.S. and internationally, focusing exclusively on organizations and social change efforts that are led by lesbians and queer women, trans and gender non-conforming people, intersex people, and people of color” — you are going to flip your shit when you read this, and you should! Riese wrote this beautiful and eye-opening piece about being at their gala and I think you will just love it.

In Defense of Dyke Style, by Kamala Puligandla

I’ve been so so proud of our theme issues, and of everything we’ve done with But Make It Fashion, and I feel like (although each piece has been so different and gotten at such different things) this one really speaks to a lot of why we were drawn to the topic: asserting that there IS such a thing as dyke style, and also that we can and should celebrate and appreciate it, not have to reform it or apologize for it.

---

Laneia’s Pick of the Month

Sarah decided that the main vibe of this holigay season would be cozy and I was READY for that vibe, so I took it very much to heart. I got a giant basket to hold all my throw blankets. I put up string lights. I filled glass bottles with evergreen branches and even found a wintry table runner for the dining table that we never use because it doesn’t have any chairs around it! But would you like to know the very best thing I bought this holigaytime? After reading Kayla’s FYC: Candles, I just gave myself full permission to live my dreams. I’m talking about these 10 inch taper candles. “Hm what the hell why do I need advice about taper candles what is this my grandmother’s house” NO, IT’S NOT, but it’s so damn cozy in here you’d think it was your grandmother’s house. Now listen up: these perfect candles only drip if you turn on your ceiling fan or otherwise create a steady breeze situation, which, why would you do that? Don’t do that. They also look very good in these chill-ass candlesticks from Ikea. Buy two sets of those candlesticks, three or four boxes of the taper candles, and just sit back like a cozy forest bear or squirrel. Ugh never in your whole life have you been so cozy!!!

---

Social Media Spotlight

These are our top tweets from every month of 2018.

January (250,809 impressions)

Here’s how to nail Jughead’s classic lesbian look on #Riverdale: https://t.co/dUTwbLefkh pic.twitter.com/ua7ytxEZS7

— Autostraddle (@autostraddle) January 4, 2018

February (212,358 impressions)

The intensely detailed Janelle Monáe and Tessa Thompson timeline you've been waiting for: https://t.co/czsS4U5SuI pic.twitter.com/7RaMeY8vh7

— Autostraddle (@autostraddle) February 24, 2018

March (295,387 impressions)

It looks like Gina Rodriguez really is going to play Stephanie Beatriz's girlfriend on Brooklyn Nine-Nine, THIS IS NOT A DRILL https://t.co/cRBlwgyQpl pic.twitter.com/sIvIV3yIzV

— Autostraddle (@autostraddle) March 1, 2018

April (328,273 impressions)

Janelle Monáe came out as a bisexual/pansexual "free-ass motherfucker" in Rolling Stone: https://t.co/sZdLO5v7f1 pic.twitter.com/t84tgvIsEJ

— Autostraddle (@autostraddle) April 26, 2018

May (150,316 impressions)

"What I Need" – @HayleyKiyoko's and @Kehlani's new music video – takes the gay agenda to new, beautiful heights: https://t.co/UfYUGYKviw pic.twitter.com/U0Tc6cuCiY

— Autostraddle (@autostraddle) May 31, 2018

June (759,880 impressions) (Our most-seen tweet ever)

Tessa Thompson has officially come out and confirmed that she is, in fact, vibrating on the same frequency as Janelle Monáe: https://t.co/OQh65oe6e3 pic.twitter.com/J4Z8qz3GfJ

— Autostraddle (@autostraddle) June 29, 2018

July (593,179 impressions)

Disney's new Hocus Pocus sequel is a teenage lesbian love story! https://t.co/2C8C4DbpNK pic.twitter.com/hXI0nKaMre

— Autostraddle (@autostraddle) July 19, 2018

August (512,468 impressions)

Excuse me Constance Wu is in a lesbian rom-com that you can watch right this second on Netflix. https://t.co/58f1Ci8vas pic.twitter.com/4ymHcvze6R

— Autostraddle (@autostraddle) August 29, 2018

September (134,507 impressions)

The #CaptainMarvel trailer is here — and these are Carol Danvers' outfits, ranked by lesbianism. https://t.co/yMS0Mvsng9 pic.twitter.com/CD2ntpgeeK

— Autostraddle (@autostraddle) September 18, 2018

October (104,673 impressions)

Tomorrow is the last day to register to vote in:
AZ
AR
FL
GA
IN
KY
MI
MS
NM
OH
PA
TN
TX
HI
IL
MT
LA
NV
UT https://t.co/eTrFfCLvqq

— Autostraddle (@autostraddle) October 8, 2018

November (151,043 impressions)

The gayest thing you could do this weekend is binge Netflix's new She-Ra. https://t.co/Hq2R81jfTZ pic.twitter.com/k6dcHfrXjR

— Autostraddle (@autostraddle) November 16, 2018

December (105,513 impressions)

Not in our name: We've united with leading lesbian, bi and queer media to send a message of solidarity to the trans community. https://t.co/SRdkQpggkK #LwiththeT @divamagazine @LezSTW @TaggMagazine @TheRealCurve @LOTLmagazine pic.twitter.com/fLTNG5ZZDO

— Autostraddle (@autostraddle) December 18, 2018

---

It’s Always Taco Tuesday In Our Hearts

Laneia: i can come up with a whole thing of reasoning and it’ll be sound and not easy but it will be like donating that mug i just donated yesterday AFTER YEARS bc truly truly it reminded me of [ex] every single fucking time i saw it! WHICH WAS DAILY !! and now that it’s gone i feel FREE
Heather: well done! i know that feeling! it is a VERY GOOD FEELING.
Laneia: mmmmmmmm 2019 will be free
Heather: i know this is frustrating but i do want to say that i think we have come A LONG FUCKING WAY since shakedown this year, personally and collectively and as a website.
and thank you for taking that on laneia
Laneia: heather! thank YOU for all the ass you kicked before the rest of us had even had coffee in the mornings
Carmen: I agree with that!! Even though I wasn’t at big bear! It’s a huge difference! Thank you Laneia (And Heather)
Laneia: now it’s time to make yvonne’s tacos !!!!
Heather: I MADE YVONNE’S TACOS LAST NIGHT!
Laneia: !!!
they NEVER get old
Heather: sending you so much love, yvonne, wherever you are!

---

XOXO

Team Autostraddle