The Autostraddle Insider: Issue 29, November 2016

Letter From Your Editors

HELLO TWO THOUSAND AND SEVENTY PEOPLE!

Welp. If we’re being honest AND WE ARE, life is kinda the worst right now. Perhaps it is for you as well! Regardless of what’s happening in your personal life, though, if you’re a human with a soul, you’re likely a bit worried about the future of the United States of America and maybe also the world? Because Donald Trump is our president-elect. And Mike Pence! Is gonna be like, running the country. How about that guy, eh? Man, what a hero. Here’s us doing things to take care of ourselves ’cause lawd knows nobody else is gonna:

1st row: Casey (hike), Beth (beach walk), Audrey + Wynn (greens), Carrie (earl grey latte) 2nd row: Carmen + Eli (desert roadtrip), KaeLyn (day naps), Laura (selfies), Erin (collage, breathing) 3rd row: Alaina (cat cuddles), Stef (tattoos), Heather (beers), Mey (witchy shit) 4th row: Laneia (pleather pants), Yvonne (purple hair), Riese (water, sunshine), Rachel (tea)

1st row: Casey (hikes), Beth (takes to sea), Audrey + Wynn (buy greens), Carrie (drinks earl grey latte)
2nd row: Carmen + Eli (roadtrips in desert), KaeLyn (takes day naps), Laura (takes selfies), Erin (makes collage, breathes)
3rd row: Alaina (cuddles cat), Stef (gets many tattoos), Heather (consumes beers), Mey (does witchy shit)
4th row: Laneia (buys pleather pants), Yvonne (makes hair purple), Riese (finds water in sunshine), Rachel (drinks all tea)

[SLIGHT PAUSE TO APPRECIATE HOW PERFECT YVONNE’S HAIR LOOKS IN THAT COLLAGE]

So we’re gonna be bulking up the newsy wing of this plane, which you likely know if you listened to the all-access podcast in which we all talked politics and then cried. Our hiring call a year ago didn’t even ask for writers who could cover the news — the amount of LGBT-related news stories that needed covering were small enough that the Senior Editors could handle it ourselves. Now all of that’s changing, and we’re making a new plan. This election cycle really alerted us to how difficult it’s been for us to adequately cover politics when there is SO much media already out there with greater expertise and access. Going forward, we’re doubling down on our signature moves: in-depth “Explainers,” complicated things explained in conversational tones, and strong opinions.

Something interesting happened regarding our election coverage, though, and it’s particularly apparent when you look at the pre-primaries conversation. From the get-go, we were determined to cover the election with neutrality within the left-wing. We were vehemently anti-Republican and anti-Trump, but did our best to let our writers speak only for themselves when discussing Democratic or Independent candidates. But. Although we didn’t explicitly side with one candidate or the other, we received heaps of complaints from community members about our coverage. Specifically: Hillary supporters were convinced we were promoting Sanders, and Sanders supporters were convinced we were promoting Hillary. Neither of these perspectives were accurate.

We were a split Senior Editorial team and readership — Laneia, Heather and I and 37% of our readers voted for Hillary Clinton in the primary, Yvonne and Rachel and 41% of our readers voted for Bernie Sanders. (We asked about primary voting on our most recent Autostraddle Reader Survey.) Here’s what we actually wrote before the primaries: Because despite being a Hillary supporter from the jump I am also a socialist, I commissioned Maddie to write an article about this Bernie Sanders fellow. Carmen wrote about merch she wanted to buy on the Hillary Clinton website. Megan Praz turned in a strip about not “feeling the Bern” for her Saturday Morning Cartoon. Rachel (Sanders voter) and Heather (Clinton voter) recapped the Democratic debates. And yet!  This phenomenon (readers perceiving we are favoring a thing that we are not favoring) happens to us a lot, but the other area in which it’s most apparent is fashion coverage — equal numbers of readers say our content is too butch/moc focused and that our content is too femme/foc focused.

The day after the election, I wondered if we should’ve done more leading up to the general election — but I’m really proud of what Yvonne, Rachel and Heather were able to do, how hard they worked, and ESPECIALLY how funny the debate recaps were. It’s not like any of our readers voted for Trump, but maybe some of them didn’t vote, and we should’ve said more about that? We honestly felt we’d be preaching to the choir. I have very strong (negative) opinions about third-party voting, should I have talked about that? If so, should we also have gotten a third-party voter to explain their reasoning? But in all of our post-election processing, the same things came up again and again: that nothing we did would’ve made a significant difference, that we did what we could with limited resources and time, and that we had no idea Trump had a shot in hell at getting elected. Nobody did. We were all blindsided.

And now we are changed.

But you know what IS great? That we finally have over 2,000 A+ members! 2,082 to be exact! Thank y’all for supporting us ’cause we have A LOT OF SHIT TO DO. I wrote three posts in one day last week, I haven’t had to do that since 2012. Anyhow, I hope you enjoyed our A+ content this month, which included a peek into our homescreens, another rousing edition of our podcast A+ Inbox Live, and FINALLY, Some Answers To Some Things You’ve Been Asking Us.

Y’all it’s a dark world out there but we’re in it together.

Love,

Riese

co-signed by Heather / Laneia / Rachel / Yvonne


Top 10 Most Popular Posts From October 2016

These posts were hella popular last month.

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1. No Filter: Carrie Brownstein And Abbi Jacobson Are A Thing, Huh?, by Stef Schwartz
2. Two Women On ‘The Bachelor’ Started Dating and I Am Finally Vindicated, by Erin Sullivan
3. 21 Things You’ll See at Every Queer Halloween Party This Year, by Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya
4. Meet The 100 Most Popular Lesbian and Bisexual YouTubers, by Laura Mandanas
5. Samira Wiley and Lauren Morelli Got Engaged, Love Is Occasionally Not A Lie, by Riese Bernard
6. OK Fine: Are Kristen Stewart And Annie Clark Dating Now Or What? by Stef Schwartz
7. Satellite of Love: Queer Horoscopes for October 2016, by Corinna
8. Shut Up And Take My Money: 15 Super Queer Etsy Stores, by Cecelia Kyoko
9. Sara Ramirez is Bisexual: “Grey’s Anatomy” Star Comes Out, Gets An Alternative Lifestyle Haircut, by Jenn
10. Naughty Lesbian Scenes, by Audrey White & Anna Archie


Nine Important Excerpts From Editorial Conversations

Riese: there are BLUEBERRY PIE OREOS
Rachel: would like to un-know this
Laneia: goddamnit
Rachel: this article has taken you to a harrowing place riese
Riese: it has indeed
Rachel: holding space 4 u


Stef: Mey Yvonne Our Beloved Selena Is Getting A Television Series About Her Life
Mey: Omgggggggggggggggg
Stef thank you
Stef: I hope the tv show is just the movie Selena over and over and over again for weeks
Mey: Wait
Do you think I could get cast as Suzette
Stef: Are you good at being totally ignored in favor of your sister?
Mey: YES
Stef: Kid, you got a future in show biz
Mey: For twenty five years my parents literally acted like they only had one daughter
Stef: Oh wow that’s true!!
Well damn, grab a dumb hat and a cow print vest and we’ll see you on the backlot


Rachel: One time I dreamt I was dating Shay Mitchell
To this day it is still the best dating-related dream I’ve ever had i think
Riese: Yeah I truly can’t imagine anything better
Yvonne: I picked up Shape magazine because she was on the cover and I turned to the story and I realized it was Shape magazine so they were talking about her workouts which I don’t really care for
so I just enjoyed her photos
Is anyone in the some answers post?


Stef: Do you think maybe you could start dating St Vincent so I could quit my job and just live off the profits from that
Riese: Isn’t she dating Kristen Stewart
Stef: You guys can have an arrangement
Annie seems chill
If that’s your only reservation, let’s get this show on the road


Rachel: Like are NYT and 538 using the same data but weighting it differently? Or different data altogether?
Should I have taken statistics in college?
Heather: I actually know this because I listen to their stupid podcast
And no, you should not have taken statistics
The 538 model has things built into it that aren’t just polls
Rachel: Oh like their historical data or whatever
Heather: Like betting data from Las Vegas and historical data and each poll is weighted personally by Nate Silver
And NYT is just polls
Rachel: I see
ok
Well, I will begrudgingly accept that
Heather: Me too, even though I can’t really understand it
but I still don’t even really understand how the internet gets into my computer, so I just have to take things on faith


Heather: For our first post election news fix what if the feature image is Dobby the House Elf going DOBBY IS A FREEEEEEE
Rachel: :sob:
What if Hillary says “not my country, you bitch” and then kills Donald Trump with her wand
Just some brainstorming i’m doing
Heather: Ooohh. Good. Good.


Laneia: I just checked twitter and clicked on the profile of a person who’d liked one of my tweets. Her profile reads “24, addicted to video games & hazelnut frappuccinos. eternally optimistic.” and her latest tweet is “real stressed abt the election i fuckin hate this country”
Riese: This is the way we live now
Laneia: I think this is the first time I’ve laughed in three days


Rachel: Today I am going to finish this post about discrimination bills if it kills me
Probably just in time for them to introduce a new bill about intentionally opening the hellmouth
Heather: Breaking: Donald Trump jr. Met With Hellmouth Supporters in October and We Sat On The story Until Today. Happy Thanksgiving!
Rachel: Powerful Hellmouth Lobby Revealed To Be Backing Voter Suppression Campaigns in Key States


Laneia: Guess how many submissions we have titled “An Open Letter to [XXXXX]” since the election
Heather: Oh man, I cannot even imagine
Laneia: My Father, My White Republican Family, My Therapist
Rachel: We could print them all out and use them to reinforce Riese’s ceiling
Laneia: Rachel you have the best ideas
Rachel: An open letter to the plumbing in Riese’s house:
Can you chill out
Laneia: Plumbing, think about something other than yourself, just once.
Rachel: Plumbing, is this really the time? Think about it.


Laneia: What’s a funny title for a section in the AAA dedicated to trump-related things, or maybe america-is-fucked type things?
i’m stuck on Lord Help Us WTF but there’s gotta be something funnier
maybe more subtle


Heather: Y’all i just got a box from the PLL writers that I assumed was a horse head but it’s a locket that says “That’s immortality, my darling” and a copy of the individual scripts they wrote that i liked with kind notes
Rachel: Oh wow
That is way, way better than a horse head
Or mask of your own face, which was my guess


Laneia: What’s the thing when you’re on the verge of crying for like 30 straight hours but you don’t know why exactly, definitely don’t have time to cry, and don’t want to. what’s that
Riese: Womanhood
Heather: Time to watch GBBO and get it out of your system, is what I call it


Mey: Omg my therapist just complimented my Gal Pal sweater and then when I said my website sells it she was like “oh that’s cool, I might have to buy one”
I’m 99% sure she’s straight but what if that was her way of saying she’s bi
Raquel: Awesome
Mey: Thanks Raquel, I knew I could count on you
Raquel’s my new bff you guys
Raquel: Omg i’m honored
Mey: You should know going in that i’m very intense and high maintenance
I’m like a Scorpio in all the bad ways but none of the good ways
Raquel: What is this “good ways” you speak of
Mey: Scorpio is the best sign! everyone knows this!
They’re the most human sign, they’re good at expressing emotions, they’re passionate, they’re great friends, they’re amazing
Audrey: I’m trying to imagine my therapist buying AS merch and I cannot.
Kaelyn: Scorpios are also hot
and great in bed
#worthit
Stef: We’re ok :sunglasses:
But continue
Kaelyn: cap4scorpio4lyfe
You’re really fucked up emotionally, but like, it’s ok because you’re great kissers is what i’m saying
Stef: I feel seen
Raquel: Can I put this on my resume…?
Stef: I’m actually just making Kaelyn’s last sentence my A-Camp bio if that’s ok
Chloe: Cosign
Kaelyn: Sorry hot scorpios, I’m taken
Sorry for me, really


Laneia: Why are these sweet humans I love so much telling me they don’t journal? If you don’t journal then I am not talking to you!
Riese: I know!
Laneia: “I need everyone with a macbook to come over and sit by me.” “I have a chrome book” THEN HUSH
THE DOGS WERE JUST ON MY BED AND NOW I WANT TO KILL THEM
Heather: The dogs just wanted to know what the journaling requirements are even though they don’t journal
Laneia the dogs don’t journal
Laneia: Oh do they not
Heather: Your response was perfect
Laneia: I was trying to channel Rachel I hope it worked
Heather: You didn’t even have to stand in the shower overanalyzing it for 20 minutes
It did!
Laneia: I am still going to have to cry though
Heather: A good place for that is the shower also
Overanalyzing and crying
Laneia: You’re right

…a few hours later…

Laneia: Y’all
What is this day??!!
Rachel: Who would have thought
Laneia: I am near hysterical right now
There’s a bottle of wine at the end of this dark tunnel
With my name on it
And a mini brie
Rachel: I have one of those Trader Joes frozen spanakopitas
Do you want some
Laneia: I do! I truly do
Heather: When I send my macbook out to sea, do you think I should say “go with god, crispy” like Maggie Smith does in Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit, or “Boom, Mr. Longbottom!” like Maggie Smith does in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2?
You can vote with prayer hands or crystal ball

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Meet A New Contributor!

Get to know some of our newest faces.

Dufrau, Contributor

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Twitter: @dufrau
Instagram: @dufrau

Who was your first woman celebrity crush?
Heather Langenkamp as Marie on Just the Ten of Us. And also as Nancy in the Nightmare on Elm Street movies. But mostly as Marie. One summer vacation, USA played reruns every morning after The Facts of Life and I taped every single episode and pretended like that was reasonable behavior. OR. It might have been Head Girl from The New Adventures of Pippi Longstocking.

Describe the worst date you’ve ever been on:
Oh man, it was bad entirely because of me. I was 21 and had somehow managed to skip actual “dating” up until that point? I asked her out when I was drunk and confident and then realized sober me had no idea what to do about it, so I invited her to a club without telling her that like six of my friends would be there, mostly ignored her because I was nervous and it was loud, and then finally she invited HER friends and we barely spoke the whole night. At the end I was like “So, you probably don’t want to invite me over, huh?” and she rightfully laughed in my face. Then also like two nights later I went to a show and all of her friends were there and it was terrible and awkward.

If you were at a karaoke bar and you had to pick one song to sing, what would it be?
I don’t know I’m not very brave. Probably some kind of dad song. Walk of Life by Dire Straits or Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner by Warren Zevon. I can tell you without a doubt though that if I ever have to become an MMA fighter my entrance music will be Fancy by Reba McEntire.

What’s your favorite thing on the internet today?
This clip from an episode of the TV show Highway to Heaven, featuring Nancy’s mom from Nightmare on Elm Street singing about being Driven. I can’t explain it, it’s completely silly and it just cracks me right up.

If you could only use one emoji for the rest of your life, what would it be?
? (excited glasses face, aka the Me emoji)

What’s something you’ve been really proud of lately?
Uhhhhh I made a batch of beef stew that was good as hell. And I fixed some dumb Windows 10 problems on my computer without having to ask for help. And I met my Goodreads goal with a whole month to spare.


YOUR MONTHLY INFOGRAPHIC ABOUT YOU

We were curious about the types of jobs you’ve all done in your extensive lives on this earth. These are the results from when we gave you a list of professions and asked you to indicate which, if any, you have ever done:

chart-jobs


MAHALO MOTHERFUCKER

Carmen: i wonder what hillary looked like when this hiker stumbled upon her and told her how much she meant to her
i wish hillary knew how much she meant to me
does anyone have her cell number or what
Stef: i wish she did too
i wish you stumbled upon her in the woods
Carmen: oh my god
picture it: november 16
i’m hiking slightly high crying a single tear for my nation
eli is being a dipshit in the woods
Stef: eli would bark at her so much
Carmen: I’m trying to instagram a photo of a tree
and then eli runs over to hillary clinton’s dogs
Stef: omg what if hillary showed up on the fake instagram hike
Carmen: tries to hump one, most likely
Stef: what kind of dogs does she have?
Carmen: wouldn’t matter
i’ve seen eli hump a greyound
Stef: wait speaking of: It’s Time To Remember How Good Obama’s Dogs Are
Carmen: so then she shows up
hillary’s like uhhhh fix this who has this dog who is this
eli is in a bathrobe, of note
the light shines down
i walk over to hillary clinton
embrace her
refuse to let go
bill doesn’t mind
Stef: she shifts uncomfortably
but smiles
Carmen: then i just whisper softly in her ear
“you mean everything to me.”
Stef: “mahalo”
Carmen: “we never deserved you.”
“mahalo motherfucker.”
hillary then asks who i am
i become the ghostwriter of her memoir
we get married and bill is down
Stef: spoiler alert hillary sent thousands of secret emails to carmen
Carmen: OH MY GOD LMAO
Stef: they were sonnets
Carmen: pitch: 25 emails the fbi never found that hillary sent me
Stef: carmen you are going to end up on a list somehow
Carmen: “hey girl, any chance you’re in town for brunch tomorrow?”
i should apply for a job in trump’s white house and just list in the app that i want to destroy it from the inside specifically to be put on a list
i want them to watch me i love the attention
Stef: i almost wish you still lived in dc just for this
just for you to show up for work every day in a suit
ready to go to work
Carmen: if i lived in dc i’d be a literal modern suffragette
Stef: “ms rios we told you yesterday and the day before that, you don’t fucking work here”
Carmen: i’d be outside that motherfucker’s white house every single day
with a big banner in my hand
in my klub deer dress
the banner would read “mahalo motherfucker”
because mahalo can also mean goodbye can it not
Stef: i think it’s like the shalom of hawaii
Carmen:

ma·ha·lo
ˈmäˌhälō/
exclamation & noun
a Hawaiian word used when thanking someone.
“mahalo to all of you who took the time to vote”

mahalo to all of you who took the time to vote
Stef: i was just about to paste that
i’m dying
Carmen: fuck off to everyone else
i’m dead
Stef: i’m getting that tattooed
Carmen: YES
Y E S
Stef: next to my “ugh not again” heart
Carmen: well my banner has to change then but it still works for whispering in hillary’s ear
okay so the banner reads
“how long will women have to wait for white men to shut the fuck up”
derivative, but original
Stef: this is such a special day in this channel


What We’ve Been Reading

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Carmen: Eleanor and Hick: The Love Affair That Shaped a First Lady by Susan Quinn

Beth: The Border of Paradise by Esmé Weijun Wang

Carolyn: Born to Run by Bruce Springsteen and Fantasian by Larissa Pham

Kayla: Tiny Beautiful Things by Cheryl Strayed

Laura M: Hag-Seed (Hogarth Shakespeare) by Margaret Atwood

Erin: Oscar Wilde’s Wit and Wisdom: A Book of Quotations by Oscar Wilde

Kai Cheng: The Woman Warrior by Maxine Hong Kingston

Casey Stepaniuk: Even This Page is White by Vivek Shraya, and href=”http://amzn.to/2gCHLBf”>The Mothers by Brit Bennett

Stef: Plastic Vodka Bottle Sleepover by Mila Jaroniec

Heather: Of Fire And Stars by Audrey Coulthurst

Samantha: Citrus Vol. 1 by Saburouta

Alaina: Bulldaggers, Pansies, and Chocolate Babies: Performance, Race, and Sexuality in the Harlem Renaissance by James F. Wilson

Audrey: The Cross and the Lynching Tree James Cone

Carrie: The Woman Behind the New Deal by Kirstin Downey

Laneia: Brown Girl Dreaming by Jaqueline Woodson

Riese: American Gods by Neil Gaiman


SLACKERS

These are our Slack notifications. (“RRLYH” is what our writers use to get the immediate attention of a senior editor. It means: Riese, Rachel, Laneia, Yvonne, Heather.)

alerts


November Retro-Reading

Some posts from previous Novembers Riese thinks you might enjoy.

How To Pick Up Chicks, by Phoenix (2009) – Observe the mating rituals of a young queer circa 2009, just dancing their way through the world, making gay eye contact, being confident, using that computer app that made normal pics look like polaroids.

Holigays 101: How To Bring Your Girlfriend Home For The Holidays, by Sarah H (2010) – Hey do you have a girlfriend? Are you going home for the hoildays? Are you bringing your girlfriend home for the holidays? Well, I don’t know. Maybe this article will help you.

What Reality TV Does to Girls, by Riese (2011) – I feel like I spent five weeks writing this article and now it’s been five years since I wrote it! Good news: it still holds up.

Butch Please: Butch Gets Emotional, by Kate (2012) – Kate had feelings and I bet you liked it. I just have that feeling about you.


MY GO-TO PERSON ON COLORS

Sarah: @channel what do you think, opt 1 or 2? and any feedback on the colors would be great too! thanks in advance too!
screen-shot-2016-11-14-at-5-21-22-pm

Stef: i like the first one
Carmen: would wear #1
actually would wear both let’s be real
colors seem fun to me
i think #1 is stronger
i think the she/her they/them is a better and maybe even more educational / conversational piece
Alaina: i think 1 is cooler but yes would wear both easily
Kaelyn: #1 is more unique looking
Alex: Great job Sarah!
Kaelyn: i like the colors!
Nikki: I like #1 more and the colors are great.
Laura: #1
Mey: i like the first one, but honestly i don’t really wear yellow
But also I think the purple and yellow go great together
Sarah: Thanks mey! what color do you think would work better since they won’t be worn together?
Laneia: what are the forecasted trend colors for winter/spring
Audrey: I actually would buy both and wear them together. Fwiw.
Also yes yes yes. Also the ribbon option rules.
Mey: For winter the colors are cranberry, forest green and goldenrod. For spring it’ll be dark versions of traditionally spring colors. Pansy purple, turquoise and black
Audrey: Mey r u hitting on me
That’s the dreamiest thing I’ve ever read
Mey: :wink:
Audrey: **faints**
Alaina: Never been more excited/turned on about seasonal color projections
Mey: And Sarah, I think the yellow will look good on ppl who wear lots of blue (including denim), pastels, bold patterns, soft neutrals, stripes and/or florals, I just personally don’t usually wear yellow
Laneia: goldenrod and cranberry or pansy purple would be cute!
Sarah: Mey from now on you are my go-to person on color ok? haha that was incredible
Riese: i just read that as “my go-to person OF color” and was like WHAT IS HAPPENING
Sarah: :laughing:
Mey: I read it as person OF color also and I was like cool, pero like, you can go to yourself for that
But also I’d be happy to be your person on color

[…]

Sarah: NEW MOCK-UP
screen-shot-2016-11-15-at-12-21-00-pm

Ali: these are perfect and i want a she/her one really badly
Mey: This is something I would proudly wear
Carolyn: yes perfect I’m so into them
Audrey: This is the best day.
Heather: i like how the she/her is hufflepuff colors!
Kaelyn: YES TO THIS.
honestly, i’ll wear yellow, not even caring that i am yellow and it looks weird on me. just happy the she/her are, for once, not pink. no hate to pink, I’m just tired of it.
Mey: i didn’t think of the hufflepuff colors
i don’t like it anymore
but kaelyn, bubblegum pink is one of my top three favorite colorssssss
(irl i still like the goldenrod, and heather i love you and you’ve made me love hufflepuffs)
also omg “not even caring that i am yellow and it looks weird on me”
Kaelyn: magenta is my favorite color, so i don’t totally hate pink
Mey: but is that just bc of rhps
Kaelyn: i mean probably yes
actually i do hate pastel pink. it just should not exist. though i feel like you could pull it off and still look hot, mey. you or aja
Mey: WHAT ABOUT NICKI MINAJ
Kaelyn: actually definitely yes
Mey: she is the queen of pink
Kaelyn: also working at planned parenthood
i became indoctrinated
oh yeah obviously nicki duh
but i feel like she goes for bubblegum pink which is totally diferent
ok, you and aja and nicki
Mey: nicki does a lot of both pastel and bubblegum i think
Kaelyn: ok i stand corrected on pastel pink
queen nicki swayed me
just please stop giving me all pink things for my baby
that’s all i ask
and make something gender neutral that isn’t green or blue geez
Mey: WHAT IF YOUR BABY IS THE NEXT NICKI MINAJJJJJ
Kaelyn: please, koreans can’t rap. i mean, many have tried, but they probably should stop
we’re really racist about it
Stef: trying to convince my brother to give his baby the gender neutral name of chewbacca schwartz
he is unconvinced and i don’t understand why
Kaelyn: that was waffle’s high school nickname
chewbacca, not the schwartz part
Stef: wow
see it has a proud legacy
i think it would be a pretty name for a girl personally
Kaelyn: because he was a weird tall person with long hair who never talked, i guess?
Stef: my niece chewbacca
Kaelyn: chewy
chewbEcca
how about that
is that better
more girly
Stef: this poor kid
Mey: Chuy is a popular Mexican name
Stef: i don’t want to appropriate mexican culture
just wookiee culture
Kaelyn: i think just nickname her that and keep at it until it sticks
Mey: Maybe your brother’s baby will grow up to be Mexican
Kaelyn: i tried to name my little sister “jelly bean” and my parents still call her “bean”
Stef: true
i tried to name my brother jennifer, it didn’t work
Mey: Also Stef, I gave you my blanket permission to appropriate Mexican culture
Stef: oh i forgot!!
shittt lemme put on some dia de los muertos makeup and hit the town
Mey: Isa’s also cool with it
You’ll look great


ALUMNI NEWSLETTER

Rose Bridges, Writer, 2011-2014

rose

What are you doing without us?
I’m currently writing weekly anime reviews for Anime News Network! We don’t have author pages, but you can read my takes on my current series, Lupin III: Part IV and HaruChika, here and here. I also sometimes write longer-form reviews and editorials for them. I’m particularly proud of this one about Maria the Virgin Witch and this one about Ouran High School Host Club. I also received my Master of Music in musicology, and have moved to Austin where I’m pursuing my Ph.D. at the University of Texas. Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, I’m working on my first book! It will be a guide to the soundtrack of the anime Cowboy Bebop and a part of the 33 1/3 series.

What do you miss the most about us?
The thing I miss most about Autostraddle is definitely the community. I’ve never met a better, smarter or more supportive group of commenters on any other website. Now that I’m covering another anime with a gay main character, I also really miss not having to submit over-the-top proof that a character is queer for the commenters to believe me. It’s made me want to participate in the commenting community again, even if I no longer have time to work for the website.

Would you invite us to your wedding, yes or no?
If I ever do get married, I definitely would invite Autostraddle to my wedding! The site helped me cut my teeth in writing online and learning how it works. Now I do a lot of it, but I’ll never forget where I started and how much Autostraddle helped me there!


I BET YOU CAN'T WAIT TO HEAR ABOUT OUR OLIVIA TRIP TO IXTAPA

I BET YOU CAN’T WAIT TO HEAR ABOUT OUR OLIVIA TRIP TO IXTAPA


Five Posts Rachel Can’t Believe You Motherf*ckers Didn’t Read Last Month

Joshua Jennifer Espinoza’s There Should Be Flowers Is a Piercing Look at the Physicality of Trans Women’s Lives, by Kai Cheng Thom

You love feelings and good poems and smart sad girls who are articulate about being sad, so you’re going to love this. It’s so incisive and thoughtful and good! Reading Kai Cheng on anything is such a luxury, and reading her on another great writer like Joshua Jennifer Espinoza is just the greatest. Kai Cheng’s going to be writing more literature essays and reviews for us; get in on the ground floor!

Miss Major Stars in The Personal Things, a Powerful and Inspiring Animated Short for TDOR, by Mey

Trans Day of Remembrance is once a year, but listening to the wisdom and experience of trans elders is every day. Watch this short video to hear Miss Major’s words on how “we can each use our own personal acts to make political change,” something I think we’re all thinking about right now.

Southwest of Salem: How Four Wrongfully Convicted Latina Lesbians Survived a Witch Hunt, by Yvonne

Yvonne did this really fantastic and in-depth interview with the creator of a film about four Latina lesbians who were wrongfully accused of sexually abusing children on the heels of the Satanic Panic, and fought for justice from prison for over a decade. Very shortly after we published this interview, all four women were declared innocent and exonerated!! I can’t prove that there is a direct cosmic link to Yvonne’s journalism, but I do think you should read this piece.

Queer, Intersectional and Funny, Brown Girls is the Most Awaited Webseries of 2017, by Ashley

HEY do you wanna watch a web series about brown queer ladies created by a crew of “95% women, people of color and/or queer people”? I thought so! You could already be doing this if you read Ashley’s article about Brown Girls, a web series where “the trailer alone tackles topics like eating ass and being single forever while brown ladies kiss each other and moms judge disappointing roti recipes.” Please do not deny yourself any longer.

2016 Was a Year of Representation But Also, Mostly, Murder for Lesbians on TV, by Heather

It’s been a really fucking weird month, so I can understand why the GLAAD TV Report for 2016 perhaps did not figure onto your inner horizon the way it might in other years. However, Heather’s writing on TV and pop culture remains powerful and necessary, and you wanna read her on one of the most (and also, maybe, least) game-changing years for LGBT representation in media.

Ain’t Afraid of No Ghosts: Talking to Ohio’s Queer Ghost Hunters about LGBT Hauntings and History, by Rachel

This is my own article, which I never ever put in these roundups because what kind of asshole does that, BUT this is a piece I’m really proud of about ghosts and history and how humans will find any way they can to connect with their own people and discover affirming stories about community, and also a web series about paranormal investigation. The group has made their Kickstarter goal (yay!) so you can read this without any concern about donation pressure or guilt. :ghost emoji:


Erin’s Pick of the Month: Disassociation

disassociation

Life: it sure does keep going! Which is why I can’t recommend enough the benefits of occasionally checking out entirely. As far as I know it’s free, although there just have to be hidden costs I’m not aware of. But hey, in the meantime, you can use it anywhere, any time, and for any occasion. How’s that for value?

Find yourself in a scenario you’d never thought you’d be in, in a bad way? Have a ball. Tense work or home environment? Why not. Existential grappling that demands a line in the sand? Not today!

All it takes is your presence of mind to go absent. Go on a trip, girl, you deserve it!

“Is this like meditation?” you might be asking yourself, and the answer is no. Meditation when done correctly lifts not only your mind but your spirit to a place of healing, whereas disassociating keeps your spirit firmly rooted to absorb the damaging effects of whatever situation you find yourself in and just takes your mind.

“Sounds awful, and not good?” Again, no. Just remember to use it in moderation, as with everything, and remember also to blink your eyes and occasionally gesture with your hands while you’re checked out mentally but still remain in your physical body. It freaks people out if you don’t.


Social Media Spotlight

Nothing brings me more joy than your faces when I’m wading through the endless firescape of Twitter. I love it when you tweet photos of yourself in Autostraddle merch, or brainstorm new hairstyles based on something you read on our site, or send back GIFs to represent your feelings about something you read. It is always a bright spot in my day when you say you’re going to buy a scissoring t-shirt, and an even brighter spot when it arrives and you tweet over a selfie. Here are some of the happiest tweets we received this month.


A Glory Like This Earth Has Never Seen

unburied-gays

Heather: marie claire is going to interview me about tv’s responsibility in the new trump era
Laneia: oooooh
Riese: ooooo
Heather: i’m going to say one lesbian and bisexual woman per show, and at least one has to be a woman of color.
Riese: also they have to make out with each other
with tongue
Heather: with the lights on
Riese: mhm
also it’d be cool if like they didn’t cut away right when the tongue starts
i’d like to see a girl remove another girl’s shirt
Heather: “lingering tongue”
Riese: yes
shirt removal, somebody lowering or pushing someone onto a surface
Heather: yes
Riese: heavy petting
also
it would be neat if sometimes the lesbian or the bisexual was masculine-of-center
or a trans woman
Rachel: if they’re taking specific requests, i would take a lesbian of color and butch bisexual woman in a lighthearted dramedy about llama farming
Riese: yes where they kiss with tongue
on a surface
i would like to see the butch bisexual woman without a shirt on
Laneia: would it be too much to ask that their family is also like “cool” about them being whatever version of queer they are
Heather: yeah there are no very special episodes
Laneia: can one of them look exactly like a straight girl
just the straightest looking cornfed farmer’s daughter
Heather: like honestly buy my pilot about rachel’s ghost brother and laneia’s childhood crush on the science prodigy yvonne
Laneia: right yes
Rachel: man that argument about how “they HAVE to die because it’s REALISTIC, otherwise how will people GET THE ISSUE” is going to go through the roof
Laneia: oh god
Riese: also if some of them were not thin
that would be a neat thing to see
if gina rodriguez could play a butch bisexual woman who takes her shirt off, that would be my dying wish
Heather: oh man, also my dying wish
man
that would be a glory like this earth has never seen
Riese: it’s exactly what america needs right now
tell them that
“this is what america needs right now, marie claire.”
Heather: probably they’ll print the article with just that as the headline and my one sentence quote
Riese: listen whatever gets the message to the people


img_4224

XOXO

Team Autostraddle

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Riese

Riese is the 43-year-old Co-Founder of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3300 articles for us.

54 Comments

  1. “not my country, you bitch” and then kills Donald Trump with her wand
    Just some brainstorming i’m doing”

    ? Okay this needs to be a shirt.

  2. I have read that Mahalo, Motherfuckers conversation and Erin’s Disassociation thing like five times each and they never stop making me cry the happiest most desperate tears.

  3. “Go with god, Crispy.”
    Obviously.
    But I may be the only person who favors the sister act franchise over the Harry Potter franchise. I realize that may be controversial, but it is my truth.

    Okay, I’ll read the thing now.

  4. Nearly did a spit take at “i don’t want to appropriate mexican culture just wookiee culture” ?

  5. I’m stoked to hear you’ll be focusing on the types of political writing this site does so well. I love reading the in-depth writing you put out on pretty much every subject, but have particularly appreciated your political writing.

    Also I loved that ghost hunters article because even though I am a wimp and have not yet worked up the courage to, you know, actually WATCH an episode, I’m fascinated by hauntings and similar tales and LGBT history is my jam.

  6. Re: presidential election coverage- I think it’s less about the balance of Bernie/ Hillary coverage as reflected by primary votes/ writers/ readers and more that people just want to be ~*seen*~ in their exact politics more. Like I think Autostraddle is doing a good job to show a range of experiences with sexuality and gender – any labels within that can mean a lot of different things to a lot of different people, so I would love to see “I’m a bisexual self-identified anarchist who voted for Bernie in the primary and Hillary in the general- here’s what that means to me” / “I’m a radical trans activist who doesn’t believe change is ever going to come from electoral politics so I don’t vote” / “I’m struggling with the anxiety of being told I’m too neoliberal by my socialist friends and too far to the left by my establishment democrat colleagues at the non-profit I work for” / “I have a hard time with binaries – from gender to sexuality to political parties” – calls for submissions or other ways to actively seek out voices along these lines would be AWESOME.

  7. “Chewbecca” made me lol. Missed opportunity for baby T-Rex, KaeLyn. Also I don’t know why but that whole conversation made me feel the need to share that there is a realtor in my town whose for real name is Thor Chinchilla.

  8. You guys, this Insider gave me a lot of feelings about how happy I am that you guys all have each other to talk to when things get rough. Like, the last few weeks have been super heavy, but your editorial conversations are making me laugh, so I’m glad that you guys were able to laugh with each other even while the world was ending. And that you’ve now brought that laughter to us.

    I’m also really grateful for your explanation at the top of the insider about the editorial focus of the site moving forward. I think that’s something a lot of us have been waiting to hear about, and needed to hear. I’ve seen a lot of comments around lately like “Where’s that San Junipero recap you promised!” or “But why didn’t you publish a separate article about THIS show” and I have so far refrained from jumping in to yell “You guys, there are more important things happening right now! Go read Jen’s piece about what’s happening at Standing Rock! Or Rachel’s roundup of all the discrimination laws that are being written right this minute!” Usually, I think ya’ll do a GREAT job at balancing the TV with the Vapid Fluff with the truly important news (and I’ll be the first to admit I read everything ya’ll publish about queer girls kissing on TV) but I’m totally on board if you want to focus a bit more on how to survive the apocalypse.

    That being SAID, I do think (and I know that ya’ll agree with this) that watching TV that makes us happy is part of the way to survive the apocalypse. Heather, I’m very excited to read your interview with Marie Claire, because i DO think TV is important, and I know you do too.

  9. my internet is terrible so i had to refresh the page 11 times to see half of the pictures before i remembered i could just open in new tab

    but this is the best??????

    also TRU @ disassociation and shirtless butch bisexual gina rodriguez

    honestly why did u make me know i wanted that, i’ll never stop wanting it

  10. This was exactly what I needed at the end of the day. I mean seriously your Slack conversations alone are worth their weight in a million goldenrod she/her pins.

  11. “What if Hillary says “not my country, you bitch” and then kills Donald Trump with her wand”
    Oh I want this so bad

  12. On another Slack I’m on I have the crown emoji as one of the ways to ping me (because “tiara” lololol). Mostly what happens is that I get notified whenever someone adds a reactji to someone’s selfie.

  13. “equal numbers of readers say our content is too butch/moc focused and that our content is too femme/foc focused”

    I find this so depressing. Without doing a statistical analysis, it seems that the content is pretty even and AS aims to represent as many gendered experiences as possible. When will we stop being threatened by attention paid to genders different from our own?

  14. I just added Erin’s piece on disassociation to the Word document containing my Autostraddle password, so it will reappear in front of my eyes every time I have to log in again just in case I need it.

  15. Those gender pins are great! Will there also be a he/him pin? I know that’s not AS’s target audience but I can think of at least three male-identifying people in my life who I would buy them for. Also how soon can we buy them?

    • D’oh! Just saw the pins in the store. Ordering now, can’t wait to put it on my work bag! I still think a male one would be good too.

  16. “would like to un-know this” = me, every day since Nov 8. Thanks for giving me the perfect phrase to describe how I feel. 

    Also, this was perfect and hilarious throughout, per ushe. Thanks for the laughs. Needed that. 

  17. I’m in this Insider for the first time, so excited!
    Also, Rachel’s article about queer ghost-hunting is super cool y’all should check it out. I somehow missed it despite my affinity for spooky stuff.

  18. Shoutout to Laneia for only getting the mini brie and not the full-sized wheel that I definitely consumed with my post-election tears

  19. The half-assed “mea culpa” at the top of the Insider is an insult to your reader base. While I’m thrilled that AS is bulking up its political coverage and making a much bigger point of encouraging direct action and civic engagement among its readers, your refusal to take responsibility for the apathy you showed in your political coverage over the months leading up to the general election is cowardly, immature, and bizarrely (not to mention undeservedly) self-congratulatory.

    While it’s difficult to gauge voter turnout this election as votes (particularly from deep blue states) continue to roll in, reports indicate that voter turnout likely hit a TWENTY-YEAR low. The rampant state-level codification in the past few years of voter suppression only underscores the duty of progressive outlets to work at overcoming the widespread apathy that has taken root among the still-enfranchised on the left. It was not enough, this year, to be anti-Trump. Voters who stayed home were anti-Trump! Third-party voters were anti-Trump! At the end of the day, however, the only path to Donald Trump’s defeat was by way of Hillary Clinton’s victory—and any grassroots work or media coverage that didn’t directly work to advance that cause (even, if necessary, with caveats in place) sabotaged their own purported agenda, not to mention the country at large.

    Autostraddle is firmly entrenched in progressive politics, and it had an opportunity—as a publication that straddled the Clinton-Sanders divide in the primary—to do its part in uniting the left to defeat a common enemy. By abdicating that opportunity, AS abandoned its duty to its readers and to the queer community throughout the United States. Your parade of excuses is an insult to the agency of your reader base—not to mention fundamentally irresponsible.

    We need a media that holds itself accountable for its mistakes so that it can avoid making the same mistakes in the future. I expect the New York Times, the Washington Post, the L.A. Times, and just about every other major media outlet to do some serious soul-searching going forward, and I do not consider AS to be exempt from this obligation just because it is a smaller or more “unexpected” media source. “Nothing we did would’ve made a significant difference”? You’re constantly reminding us that AS is the largest media outlet in the world for queer women. Michigan went to Trump by a margin of fewer than 11,000 votes; Clinton lost MI, WI, and PA by approximately 80,000 votes COMBINED.

    AS could have encouraged its readers to phone bank, to canvas or donate or volunteer; it could have assigned articles dissecting the GOP’s 20-plus-year smear campaign against Hillary; it could have run pieces exploring how to reconcile the national need for a Hillary victory with the grave (and completely valid) concerns many AS readers might have had about her human rights record. I’ve seen a lot of comments, on AS and elsewhere, indicating that Carrie Wade’s article about canvassing for Hillary convinced other people to volunteer and campaign. YES, AUTOSTRADDLE, YOU COULD HAVE MADE A DIFFERENCE IN THIS ELECTION—you just didn’t want to.

    And now you have to run articles about how to survive in a fascist autocracy.

    • I feel like AS did do some of the things you’re referencing? And also I’m pretty sure AS didn’t singlehandedly lose us this election. I’ve been reading urgent election and political coverage in News Fix and standalone articles here on AS for the past year.

      • AS didn’t “singlehandedly lose us this election” but their coverage was about as sparse as a women’s website based in the U.S. could afford to be. There was no push for readers to take action; there was no coverage that dove deeper than the latest headlines; I consistently saw terrific writing from AS staffers about Hillary and the election on other websites (and even on social media!) that was all the more striking to me for its absence on AS itself. AS never even endorsed Hillary in the general! That’s an appalling failure on AS’s part.

        Autostraddle’s base includes a HUGE community of anti-establishment progressive readers who were (in many cases rightly) deeply skeptical of what an HRC presidency might mean for the country. They could have found a way to engage those people in a conversation about the importance of supporting her candidacy while also giving valid HRC-related concerns their just due. Autostraddle could have made a difference and chose not to bother.

        The truth of the matter, though, is that I’m a lot less interested in actually excoriating Autostraddle for past mistakes (what’s done is done, after all) than I am in simply seeing AS cop to its errors in judgment—because, until I see that, I don’t know that I can trust AS to avoid repeating those mistakes in the future. *That* is what I’m after.

        • I guess I don’t see AS as a ‘hard news’ source in the same way you do, perhaps. As an intersectional queer feminist lifestyle blog that sometimes highlights and breaks down the news for us, I think they do a great job. But I don’t think it’s their place to endorse a candidate (and I’m not sure how they would’ve endorsed a candidate given that their editorial staff was split), and I certainly hope that no one is ONLY getting their news and politics information from Autostraddle.

          Clearly, the world has changed. It seems like in the past AS has worked hard to change with it, as they increased their intersectionality and the diversity of the writers and issues covered, and it’s also clear from what they say above and from the work they’ve published that they have gotten more political since the election. From what they say above I don’t see an editorial staff that is resisting change or denying that they have a responsibility to dive more into politics and global events.

          • I think that a media outlet which specifically caters to a marginalized community has certain obligations to that community. In the case of a U.S. political election–especially this year’s–to act in the queer community’s best interests would have been to advocate for Hillary in the general election. The staff was not split during the general election campaign (and if they were–if there was anybody on staff who voted third party or did not vote or god forbid voted for Trump or advocated for any of those things–then those people are actively complicit in and responsible for the results of this election, miss me with y’all’s hurt feelings, I don’t give a fuck), and refusing to endorse LITERALLY THE ONLY PERSON WHO COULD STOP TRUMP–let alone the only actually competent candidate this year, full stop–was a hugely embarrassing and irresponsible misstep on Autostraddle’s part.

            Either Autostraddle believes their work makes a difference–as their shift in tone following the election implies–or they don’t (as they LITERALLY SAID ABOVE while seeking to absolve themselves of guilt). If they’re so unwilling to accept responsibility for failing to do right by their audience prior to the election that they will actively embrace this kind of cognitive dissonance, I have little to no faith that they will step up the *next time* “doing the right thing” requires an active denunciation of the childish notion of ideological purity currently subsuming progressive America.

          • No worries, haha, I figured that was what you meant. But that’s my point–it’s one thing not to take sides during the Democratic primary, but during the general there was no reason NOT to, y’know?

    • Keely, I understand your frustration and I respect that you are speaking up and out for what you believe in — but I think your anger and (rightful) terror about a Trump presidency are clouding your ability to fairly assess our role in this election. You’re engaging in some name-calling here and making inaccurate statements about our motives as if they were fact. It’s hard to come into a conversation where someone’s calling you cowardly and immature, and suggesting that you didn’t want to make a difference in the election, and maintain open-hearted, logical discourse, but I’m going to try.

      Every single thing that led to Trump’s election, we covered it. As you say, voter turnout was at a 20-year low, and we consistently wrote about the things that led to that 20-year low: SCOTUS gutting the Voting Rights Act, legislative gerrymandering in swing states, voter ID laws, voter intimidation, etc. 14 states engaged in restrictive voting laws targeting minorities, and we covered them all. Post-election data shows depressed voter turnout in larger, more diverse cities (in states that engaged in active voter suppression) and a spike in rural (white) votes in those same states.

      On a good day, a few thousand people click on news articles on Autostraddle. There is literally no way on earth an endorsement from us — or a pro-Hillary deep dive every day of 2016 — could have compensated for the literal United States government going to war against voters of color, or for the head of the FBI playing partisan politics, or for Russia’s active involvement in our election, or for the scourge of fake news on social media. We have influence, but we don’t have “100,000 voters in swing state” influence. Apparently no publication has that kind of influence, in fact; one of the major takeaways from 2016 is that endorsements didn’t matter.

      Why endorsements didn’t matter is the most important thing: This election, at its core, was white male supremacy vs. women, gay people, trans people, black people, brown people, disabled people, non-Christians, immigrants, etc. It was a backlash against the idea of a woman following a black man as president of the United States. It was racism and misogyny made manifest in an amoral, egomaniacal billionaire who stepped into a vortex of uninformed, brainwashed voters (something I’ve written about in painstaking detail on this website).

      What we do here every single day — what every person on our staff has committed their life to do — is battle the white supremacist patriarchy. We provide a safe space and community for those who fight with us, and we give voice to all the people the white supremacist patriarchy wants to crush. We inform and we empower and we entertain and we hold space for everyone Trump supporters stand against. We spend ourselves to the point of exhaustion battling racism, sexism, homophobia, transmisogyny, ableism, xenophobia, and on and on. We fight back against the darkness of this culture, and that’s THE most important thing. This election defied everything we know about American history and political science because this election was, above all, the biggest battle (so far) in a culture war that’s been brewing from the moment colonizers set foot in the Americas.

      There is no place on the entire internet like Autostraddle. We do what literally no one else can do — but that doesn’t mean we can do literally everything.

      I know you’re angry and I know you’re scared. I’m angry and I’m scared too. We all are. But I hope you can take a step back from that anger and fear to assess where you should place your blame for the election of Donald Trump. We did take a side, and we never stopped fighting.

      • Autostraddle did a decent job of reporting the facts of this election. But I saw very little in the way of analyses, calls to action, or even GOTV efforts. Endorsements are obviously not the end-all be-all of election season (on either end of the equation), but your collective refusal to issue one is emblematic of the bigger issue I’m taking with the way y’all ran your pre-election game.

        AS obviously isn’t addressing an audience of mixed red and blue voters—it’s addressing an audience that is deeply progressive but in a lot of cases feels deeply detached from the system. AS had an opportunity to address, I’m sure, a TON of third-party voters and deliberate opt-outs and engage them in a conversation about how we could work together to achieve what for most of us would have been the only safe outcome of this election without sidelining the valid concerns many readers probably have with the political process. But it felt—and continues to feel—like AS as a whole was more concerned with not alienating third-party and/or anti-Hillary readers than with thinking ahead to the very tangible consequences of a potential Hillary loss.

        Can Autostraddle’s readership make a difference or can it not? If we’re “too small to matter” then there is no point in running articles about activism in the wake of the election. But if we are, in fact, capable of making a difference—then, yes, Autostraddle should hold itself accountable for what it did *and failed to do* in the months and weeks leading up to the election. A post about direct action in support of HRC’s campaign that reaches a thousand—or even a few hundred—readers means that many more people who might have been newly inspired to donate, or canvas, or make calls. That matters! That’s the kind of stuff that turned Nevada blue!

        Look, obviously xenophobes and white supremacists and literal Nazis are to blame for Trump’s election—not to mention the people who, while claiming not to be any of those things, could tolerate them enough to vote for Trump anyway. But the left spent most of the year OBSESSED with this idea of ideological purity, and that was something we needed to address within our ranks if we had any hope of coming together to stop Trump. By failing to take on that responsibility, yeah, I do think that AS is complicit (on however minor a level) in what happened.

        And—again—I’m not saying all this because I want to castigate AS for any perceived past failures! Believe it or not, I’m saying this stuff because I’m looking ahead—toward the next time we find ourselves faced as a nation with issues of ideological impurity—and I want to know that AS won’t replicate this year’s approach. And I’m upset because the persistent dodging I’m seeing leads me to fear that it’ll just be exactly the same.

        • Can Autostraddle’s readership make a difference or can it not? If we’re “too small to matter” then there is no point in running articles about activism in the wake of the election.

          Yes, of course we can make a difference. We have and will continue to do so. Can Autostraddle’s readership solely overcome government-backed voter supression, foreign government interference, FBI meddling, the social media dominance of propaganda (backed by one of the most powerful governments in the world), and the fear/resentment of millions of straight white rural Christians? No. And I think acknowledging that harsh reality is more important than anything else in terms of plotting the course of our activism in the future. We have to actually understand what went wrong to understand how to combat it. Lack of endorsements, critical analysis of Hillary and Trump: that’s not what went wrong.

          “Autostraddle is too small to matter” vs. “Autostraddle could have swayed the election in Hillary’s direction” is a false dichotomy. And if that kind of over-simplified binary thinking dominates the post-election conversation, we will miss the real lessons of this election and that’s what will doom us to failure.

          And, look, I get it. I’d feel a hell of a lot better if I could place some concrete blame on any one person or any one thing. The existential despair that has greeted the clear-eyed realization that nothing I could have done would have made a real difference in this election is literally the hardest thing I’ve ever been through in my life. But I have to acknowledge and deal with that reality to figure out how to best use my skills to change the future.

          • I fundamentally disagree with your assessment. I think you are letting yourself and Autostraddle off the hook in a way that does both Autostraddle and its readers a massive disservice and in a way that makes me worry for the future of Autostraddle as a platform. You can trust that I am paying scrupulous attention to the “real lessons of this election” and in my view one of the most terrifying is the fracturing of the left. Autostraddle needs to recognize that ignoring this won’t make it go away and it sure as hell won’t get us any closer to finding a solution.

          • Can we maybe just remember for a moment that AS is not a Big Media Corporation, but a small grassroots entity run on a slim budget that exists thanks only to the copious amounts of time, work, effort, actual sweat and tears, and probably actual blood too, of a small handful of dedicated people who are only doing this because they genuinely care about this community? And that maybe coming at these underpaid, overworked, overstressed people, waving pitchforks and insisting that they should self-flagellate for not getting their pre-election coverage exactly right, is not in any way an effective or appropriate way of trying to advance anybody’s cause? Jesus fucking Christ.

          • You want to talk about being terrified of fracturing the left, let me tell you, maybe take a very close look at your own approach to engaging in dialogue.

          • Oh man, if you think I’ve ever let myself off the hook for anything in my entire life, you should grab a coffee with my therapist! “I just don’t think Heather is hard enough on herself” would earn you a spit-take for the ages.

        • Co-signing Heather. YOUR ELOQUENCE AT ALL TIMES NEVER CEASES TO AMAZE ME.

          also… the letter from the editor wasn’t self-congratulatory because I wasn’t congratulating myself, because I didn’t do anything. i was swamped with planning/recovering from a last-minute camp and a lot of personal shit in the two months leading up to the election. and i feel shitty about that. literally on november 9th I woke up in Ixtapa and we were walking to breakfast and i said to my ex that I should’ve written something against third-party voting and she said “it wouldn’t have made a difference.” but i didn’t stop thinking about it. and then i came back and talked to my team about it, and i went into that conversation with a lot of theories / assumptions, some similar to yours, and came out with a thorough understanding and support of the choices made and comfort saying i was proud of them.

          i also said “and now we are changed.”

          because we are. we had an extensive conversation about the importance of taking risks, having strong opinions, and leading the community rather than mirroring it. i take our responsibility really seriously, and after a year of 8-hour days, have gone back to the ‘ol 12-to-14. we know there’s work to be done and i’ve said that many times.

    • Can I just chime in as an international reader of Autostraddle?

      I frankly would have been rather annoyed if Autostraddle went as full-on as you are hoping they would, because unlike all the other publications you have mentioned, Autostraddle isn’t solely American. It has a core American team, yes, but also staff members and contributors (including myself) from around the world. Its coverage of international issues could be much better, yes, though I understand their reasonings for this being the case.

      But publishing to the degree you are telling them they should have would have been a turn-off for some of us international readers. It would be heavy on the “how to change America” while assuming other countries are unimportant. There isn’t necessarily a scarcity of content, sure. But there is only so much a smaller team like Autostraddle can do, and if all resources were spent on turning Autostraddle into the biggest activist source for the American election, coverage of what’s happening in other parts of the world starts to suffer.

      The world is not solely America. I found Autostraddle’s coverage to be reasonably balanced in that regard.

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