This playlist is part of the 13 Days of A+. From December 13 through December 25, we’re celebrating the people who literally keep our lights on, who believed we could make it through 2020, who invest and participate in this community through challenges and growth and change — that’s YOU. It’s truly magical to have so many guardian gayngels looking out for this space, and we’re so delighted to be able to do something a little special for our queer fam to close out the year. Some of what we publish for the 13 Days will be cozy and familiar, like Into the A+ Advice Box and Some Answers to Some Questions You’ve Been Asking Us. Some of it will be a twist on regulars; we have Malic White as a guest editor for two installments of the erotica series S L I C K for one… and the rest? We’re going to keep those pieces all boxed up in scissoring-patterned wrapping paper until they publish. We’re looking forward to spending some time with you. 💙

We asked the team: “What song will you have on repeat while snow piles up outside (or while you throw on a long-sleeve shirt if you live in a warmer climate) that our members should, too? What lets you lean into the quieter part of the season?” And what the Autostraddle team came up with is equal parts contemplative, moody, hopeful and all-around good for queers with Seasonal Affective Disorder. Thanks for letting us share an hour of music with you.

Valerie Anne: “December” by Sara Bareilles

I have an entire melancholy winter playlist because I like to snuggle up to my sadness in these dark, cold months. This song matches that ache in tone and lyrics and I appreciate it.

Malic: “Holy” by Jamila Woods

This is my all-time favorite “everything is going to be ok” song. I’ll be needing this on repeat.

Meg: “Tracks in the Snow” by The Civil Wars

This is the song that plays in my head whenever I’m walking outside in the snow. It just feels like winter to me, cozy and sweet and gentle, a song made for snuggling by the fire and enjoying the quiet.

Vanessa: “Wherever Is Your Heart” by Brandi Carlile

Listen, it’s not that this is just a perfect song for winter, it’s more that this is the most perfect song in the world, period. Does it feel good in the winter? Sure. Because it’s perfect, and it always feels good.

Sarah: “Eyes” by Natasha Kmeto

“I’ve been singing sad songs for too long”. This song captures the tension between hope and fear that captures so much of my feelings of 2020.

Kamala: “L.A. Night” by Yasuko Agawa

In the winter, I feel extra enamored of LA and also of a jaunty jazz-funk jam that makes me want to put on velvet loafers, a smoking jacket and sway as I lift my pinky to sip my highball. That’s what a xylophone does to me. While I’m not a Christmas person, per se, I do love holiday parties and I miss them, so I like listening to songs that remind of all the swanky and sleazy adventures just waiting out there in the city, and that I look forward to some day.

Molly: “Extraordinary Life” by Gordi

This is the only happy song I have been listening to and this entire album is perfect. It’s nice to feel a little happy in the cold every once in a while.

Abeni: “Icy” by Kim Petras

Kim Petras is my problematic fave, so I had to include her here. Also, who says winter means you have to listen to slow folksy chill music? With this song you can jam out – and it’s called “Icy,” so it is THEMATIC, honey.

Carmen: “Cold War” by Janelle Monáe

Ok so Janelle singing about the internal struggle between being who you’ve always known you were meant to be and being what others expect you to be, is not about the actual physical “cold” as in winter… but I’m going with it! This is my favorite android ballad — it’s quiet, haunting, searching for something more deep within. I’ll never not love it.

Drew: “Sullen Girl” by Fiona Apple

I have seasonal affective disorder which is what I call my year round depression when it’s winter. So, sure, Tidal is always one of my go-to sad girl albums, but it just feels so right this time of year!

Heather: “I Do Not Care for the Winter Sun” by Beach House

Winter has become my favorite season in my grown-up life, which is kind of odd because I do have Seasonal Affective Disorder, but it’s the time of year when what’s outside matches what’s inside my brain. Winter sits right with me; there’s no dissonance. I like cold weather. I like the smell and taste and feel and sound of snow more than just about anything on earth. I like the quiet and the bitter wind and scarves and puffy coats and hot coffee and tea and cider and snuggling up and underneath heavy blankets to get warm. I think I feel about winter how most people feel about hazy days summer afternoons, which makes the jingle bell dream-pop of this Beach House classic a perfect choice for me.

Adrian: “Two-Headed Boy Pt. 2” by Neutral Milk Hotel

Winter makes me regress into my sad suburban teenager state, so it’s a lot of NMH and Cat Power and Yo La Tengo for me right now. I’m trying to re-learn this song on guitar maybe? We’re all gonna make it, I swear.

Nicole: “Misty” by Kate Bush

It’s a 13 minute song about falling in love with a snowman. I… listened to this album on repeat for a few days after creating the call for this playlist AND THEN realized that what I thought was a mysterious snowman-coming-to-life situation a la Frosty might have actually been something more occult? Listen, Kate sings about rolling the snowman, giving him life, then her hand is mysteriously bleeding (???), she skips inside and Misty follows and gets right into bed with her. Later, she sings “what spirit is this?” as if she doesn’t know. She knows. She built a snowperson and conjured a spirit to inhabit him and then had sex with a bunch of possessed snow! A winter mood if there ever was.

Rachel: “River” by Indigo Girls covering Joni Mitchell

I took so long to contribute to this because I wanted so badly to try to come up with any other song than this that would be an authentic choice, but the truth is the winter song of my heart is this just absolute all-star bummer! [Stefan from SNL voice] this club has everything, folks – the unique melancholy of spending the winter in a place that doesn’t even get cold, knowing that your relationship is ruined and it’s 100% your own fault, wanting to run skate away from your feelings, the disconnect of being devastated when everyone else around you is cheerful and joyous – and let’s go for the Indigo Girls cover just to add some texture to this choice!

Natalie: “These Days” by Nico

If you’d asked me this question at any other time, in any other year, my answer would be different… maybe something soulful that’d keep me snuggled up on the couch, enjoying a hot toddy. But this winter? The winter of this hellscape of a year? “These Days” feels particularly poignant.

Now if I seem to be afraid
To live the life that I have made in song
Well it’s just that I’ve been losing
For so long

Written by Jackson Browne when he was just 16, “These Days” has been covered by everyone from Dawes frontman Taylor Goldsmith to St. Vincent to Drake to Miley Cyrus. But it almost doesn’t matter who sings it… the devastating lyrics pierce your heart regardless.

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