In honor of television’s top Wife Guy Jeff Sadecki being back on our televisions for the second season of Yellowjackets, I, with the help of some dear friends, came up with this personality quiz, which will tell you exactly what style of Wife Guy you are in your heart. Let me be clear: The term “Wife Guy” for our purposes is both complimentary and gender neutral. You do not have to have a literal wife in order to exhibit the qualities of a Wife Guy. You do not even need to be in a relationship at all. This quiz will simply tell you about the Wife Guy energy you bring to the table and perhaps can be applicable to non-romantic relationships, like the way you ride for your bestie or would physically fight someone on the behalf of your dog. What we’re really psychoanalyzing here is your propensity for loyalty, partnership, and devotion.
Why a murder mystery party? Because it sounded fun! And because, as my friend pointed out, there are lots of trust exercises necessarily baked into the concept of a murder mystery. Let’s have some murdery fun!
“You are the kind of Wife Guy who cooks elaborate meals for your wife.”
This might be my most accurate result so far!*
*If I had a wife.
*I mean I know you don’t have to have a wife for this, just thought I should clarify in case anyone thought I was out here pretending to have a wife… aaaaaaaand I’m overthinking, welcome to my brain.
“You are the kind of Wife Guy who would help your wife hide a body.”
Hopefully this never has to get tested.
Same!!
me three, WHAT IS UP WITH OUR WIVES
Me as well ;_;
Like sure this is my vibe, but I’d prefer for things to not go there lol.
the kind of wife guy who cooks elaborate meals!
and now i really want to throw a murder mystery party
“You are the kind of Wife Guy who puts a sticker with your wife’s Instagram handle on it on your car.
Don’t let anyone call you a simp, even though you’re kind of a simp! You want the world to see how beautiful your wife is, and you want to help boost that follower count, and that is very nice of you. Display that sticker with pride, because you are indeed very proud of your wife!”
I have a couple of friends from school who boost each other’s projects like this, and I find it super endearing.
“You are the kind of Wife Guy who will take one thousand photos of your wife until you get the right shot.”
I literally just took Elise’s new headshots so… yes.
This cover image is perfection.
“You are the kind of Wife Guy who loves flirting with your wife and generally being romantic.”
Maybe it’s not gross if I’m doing it?
I will open the pickle jar!
“You use your strength as a way to genuinely help out when needed. It’s HOT when you open that jar. You always at least let your wife try first, too.”
I was wondering which little jeff picture corresponded to which answer, they were all picked so beautifully!
“You are the kind of Wife Guy who will take one thousand photos of your wife until you get the right shot.”
This is not wrong, although my spouse is a little camera shy, so I don’t get to take that many photos of him. But in general, definitely willing to do The Thing he needs multiple times until it’s right.
“You are the kind of Wife Guy who will take your wife’s side in any conflict.”
The first person I thought of was Josh Gondelman, who does a joke about this in his special, and I am a-ok with having Josh Gondelman energy.
(He is a straight cis man comedian but his comedy is overall very kind and he loves his actual wife, Maris Kreizman, a whole lot.)
My wife and I are apparently both the type to open the pickle jar but not be condescending about it – so yay equality? :)
I will open the pickle jar!
“You use your strength as a way to genuinely help out when needed. It’s HOT when you open that jar. You always at least let your wife try first, too.”
I was wondering which little jeff picture corresponded to which answer, they were all picked so beautifully!
“You are the kind of Wife Guy who offers space in your suitcase to your wife when you go on a trip together.
Your wife needs the extra space for backup outfits and shoe options, and you are more than willing to provide! That’s you, a generous provider. Of suitcase space and in the bedroom.”
I tend to travel as light as possible, so yea, this tracks.
all my friends lowkey/highkey hate jeff but he will always have a spot in my heart because of “THERES NO BOOKCLUB?!” and so, i was very excited to see this quiz
ahh! pickle jar strength–time to hit the gym for my loves ᕦ(•̀_•́)ᕤ
“You are the kind of Wife Guy who takes your wife’s side in any conflict with others, no matter how unhinged your wife is being.” Yes, accurate. You called it Kayla!!!
You are the kind of Wife Guy who puts a sticker with your wife’s Instagram handle on it on your car.
True true!!! 🙋🏾♀️🤣🤩