Emily does help the creepy stalker fangirl, Sydney, in the locker room by showing her how to figure out how long her stroke length should be by figuring out her wingspan. This is literally referred to as an ape index. I’m going to be honest with you. I just tried this technique and it turns out I’m a negative two. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? I feel really bad for being in the negative.
Regardless of my shortcomings, Paige comes on in and makes the event SO AWKWARD where Paily start a “we’re together” “no we’re not” “we WERE together” “let’s forget about it” kind of convo.
Sydney seems important and I can’t put my finger on why. New betrayal for Emily? New love interest for Emily? She does have a strange obsession already.
In another kind of strange scene out of nowhere, Aria gives Ali Ezra’s manuscript and acts super annoyed about it. Someone’s a little jelly, perhaps?
Hanna and Emily end up back at the Philly apartment they followed Jason to last episode and they speak to the creeper dude outside. Turns out he’s been delivering pizza to people in the building? He confirms Jason was in New York the night Mrs. D was murdered, giving him a pretty solid alibi in not murdering his own mother. But also, what’s going on? Jason went to this place to get clean instead of the rehab place he said he did?
Spencer waltzes on into the DiLaurentis house and talks to Jason, who tells her that he’s skipping town soon. I wouldn’t want to live in that house, either, to be honest.
She shows him the email from Mrs. D and he acts annoyed about it, but makes it clear that it might be for their father. HMMMMM.
Hanna and Emily road trip back from Philly, and in the car, Hanna asks Emily about coming out. Intern Grace and I were CONVINCED Hanna was about to come out during this part. Emily is really mature in her answer, which was way better than anything I have made up on the spot about coming out. Emily says it isn’t like becoming someone else, it was just who she is. Very well put. Hanna is really working through identity things in this episode, and I like that. She’s over the Queen Bee thing and now she gets to figure out exactly who she is.
Alison shows up to see Ezra and tell him that Aria gave her a copy of Ezra’s book. You remember that? The tell-all book that Ezra was using everyone to get info on about Alison? Mhmm. Ali thinks Ezra left things out of the manuscript on purpose, and he doesn’t deny doing so. What do you think is still left out?
Hanna confronts Mona in the coffee shop, because Mona knew Ali was alive when the two of them were in glamour boot camp. but Mona makes the excuse that she made Hanna memorable and popular. She asks if anyone even remembers the Hefty Hanna era Hanna anymore, even Hanna?
Spencer tells Aria about what Jason told her about trusting their father. She’s still worried that she might have killed the girl in Ali’s grave. She’s not convinced her parents think it wasn’t her. At the same time, she brings up Aria having to see Ezra, which, in reality, would have been kind of miserable. This is the episode of exes, isn’t it? Aria and Fitz, Emily and Paige, Hanna and Mona, Spencer and her memory… it’s awkward feelings all around.
