If there was a German word for happy songs that for some reason feel like a wrecking ball to your serotonin levels, this post would need that tag. Now I know everyone is going to have different perspectives on what they consider a happy song, but I’m talking about objectively happy songs – songs that have been mutually agreed upon by department stores, commercials, and moms’ cars.
You’re not rolling up into a TJ Maxx hearing “Angel” by Sarah McLachlan, you’re hearing an upbeat, top 40-ly song. They’re keeping it high and tight because otherwise you’re going to be browsing through the candle aisle asking yourself, the universe, “What am I doing here?” and take your maxxinistics elsewhere. Commercials have the same approach. (Except, coincidentally, for the one that features “Angel” by Sarah McLachlan, but that is an outlier of which we don’t speak.) They know they’re not going to be pushing back to school clothing with anything less than jubilation. And then moms, well, moms don’t like to feel sad in their cars. It’s their special time alone with their thoughts. They’re cranking – and by cranking I mean barely turning the dial – something light and breezy.
You know the ones? Those are the kinds of songs that give me that 2:30 feeling.
It’s unclear why they make me sad! Unless it’s very clear to some of you and I’m in for some bad news. Look, I’m not a scientist or a doctor – full stop. Ahaha, I should have just made that the entire article. “Look, I’m not a scientist or a doctor” and then a playlist of objectively happy songs that double-hand fire extinguish the flame in my heart.
I realize this playlist will absolutely delight another person. That’s great! I love you, never change. This is just, as they say, “my truth.” Enjoy! (Or don’t!)
