Feature photo of Nadia Aboulhosn Shot by Misha Meghna. All of the photographs on NSFW Sundays are taken from various tumblrs and do not belong to us. All are linked and credited to the best of our abilities in hopes of attracting more traffic to the tumblrs and photographers who have blessed us with this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If there is a photo included here that belongs to you and you want it removed, please email bren [at] autostraddle dot com and it will be removed promptly, no questions asked.
Welcome to NSFW Sunday!
+ At the Toast, Katie Klabusich writes about solo poly — which for her is “a few romantic relationships happening at a time that work a lot like friendships with an intimacy bonus. I tack on ‘solo’ and call myself ‘solo poly’ because I’m not shopping for a roommate; I like my own space, freedom, and ridiculous work schedule” — and being seen as two-dimensional, personal agency, mono-normativity and how everyone should just stop making assumptions:
“The more I have to explain my intimate life to others, the more I daydream about a culture that doesn’t demand I — or anyone else — do so. What if we didn’t have any assumptions at all? What if, when we went on a first date, we all had to ask the other person what they were looking for and where they’d live if they could live anywhere and whether they want marriage or kids or days full of surfing and golf or knitting and gardening? What if, when we asked someone out, we were actually asking out that person and not shopping for someone to fill a predetermined role we’d imagined for them? Dating shouldn’t be like hiring an assistant or a pet sitter.”
+ Queer girl pick-up strategies, in haiku:
“Perfect the art of
leaning on things. Once mastered,
hook thumbs into jeans.”
+ A new illustrated alphabet aims to help normalize sex and disability. Artist Pâté told Refinery 29:
“I loved the idea of an A-to-Z of sex and disability that takes a raunchy and light-hearted approach to debunking the myth that disabled people don’t have fulfilling sex lives and relationships, when nothing could be further from the truth,” he tells us. “I hope people enjoy it on a visual level and that it makes them smile. I think irreverence and humour are great persuasive tools, they have a way of making people relax and listen.”
+ More sex can lead to more happiness — but only to a point. (The point is “once a week.”) According to a recent study, there is:
“‘[A] linear association between sex and happiness up to a frequency of once a week, but at higher frequencies there is no longer an association,’ Amy Muise, a social psychologist at the University of Toronto Mississauga who led the research, said in an email. ‘Therefore it is not necessary, on average, for couples to aim to engage in sex as frequently as possible.’”
The caveat, though, is “what emerges from the group doesn’t trump your personal experience. You can go on doing what works for you and your honey. The take-home message, Muise says, is that it’s “important to maintain a sexual connection with a romantic partner, but it is also important to have realistic expectations for one’s sex life (given that many couples are busy with work and family responsibilities.)”
Our own Lesbian Sex Survey produced similar results, although we didn’t see a big shift in relationship happiness until we got down to once a month or less.
+ Vulva emojis vulva emojis vulva emojis. (Update: plagiarized vulva emojis.)
+ What’s the difference between nudity and porn?
+ Sugarbutch rounded up the best queer sex blogs.
+ At Oh Joy Sex Toy, Erika Moen wrote about genitals and how boners are for everyone.
+ The best way to prevent harm and discrimination against sex workers would be to actually protect them.
+ Chlamydia, syphilis and gonorrhea had an “alarming” rise in 2014, according to a new report from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
+ From the Autostraddle Lesbian Sex Archives: Let’s talk about sexting:
“For me, sexting feels like something between a private smile across a crowded table and the best conversation and full-on banging. It makes me feel closer to my person, keeps the sexual tension high, is more tailored than any published erotica ever could be and lets us both come because of each other no matter how far apart we are.”
Also remember that time a reviewer tried out the Mustang Royale? Also Neon Moon’s recent lingerie campaign fights body shaming and transphobia (update: Neon Moon is actually the worst.).
