If Women’s Magazine Covers Were Aimed at Queer Women, Pt. 2

Welcome back to covers of JKLAFGHD Mag, the Magazine for Women Who Aren’t Straight. Every so often we check in here to catch up on the latest not-straight trends, get updates on the not-straight classics, and check in with our favorite not-straight celebrities. Up next in our September through November issues are Evan Rachel Wood, Kate McKinnon and Stephanie Beatriz.


September – Evan Rachel Wood

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October – Kate McKinnon

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November – Stephanie Beatriz

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Erin

Los Angeles based writer. Let's keep it clean out there!

Erin has written 208 articles for us.

64 Comments

  1. “how much should you read into that X-Files tattoo?” i feel personally called out to by these covers

  2. You know me. I just bought a pair of “girlfriend” jeans, wore them a few times, and promptly bought two more pairs. The name kills me but they make my ass look great!

  3. I was hoping one of the headlines on one of the magazines was going to be “DIY Non-Toxic Spider Control…..Using Kitchen Utensils and a Mason Jar, video by Dr. Erin, PhD, BioControl, and assistant”.

      • I can visualize a photo of your face on the cover right now. Ball cap on backward. Your mouth scrunched into that intense game face of yours! There are some creepy ass spiders in the house that have got to GO! Your mild mannered assistant urges caution. But there is a calm confidence behind the protective goggles that cover your steely eyes, as you hold your trusty tongs and long handle spatula!
        Just below your photo is your famous quote: ” Stand behind me, sister, and keep that Tupperware handy! WOMEN at work here!”

  4. These are utterly brilliant
    And why are so many straight women wearing Tevas? Before it was just the queers and German tourists but now…

  5. A fashion-forward friend to whom I had only kind of recently come out to one day suggested that I buy some girlfriend jeans

    I was like “Jane, just because I’m queer, like, you don’t have to change what boyfriend jeans are called. I can still wear boyfriend jeans.”

    She was like “no you dope that’s what they’re called it’s a style.”

    The end

  6. Y’all I been working with InDesign too much because I tried to the select type like I was going to edit it, forgetting for half a second it was a jpeg in a web browser.

    I see a layout of a print item on a computer screen and my brain immediately assumes it’s InDesign and something editable I’m supposed to edit.
    This is my life now, there’s no going back.
    CTRL Z does not apply.

    • Heyyyy fellow InDesign user! (Fellow designer?!) I go between InDesign and Autostraddle all day long so I relate to this SO well.

      My first thought upon seeing this feature again was “I should offer to design the next one and make these scarily realistic” and my second thought was “no, I would take that way too seriously and it would destroy me and I would have to leave AS forever.”

      • Hey back (and yesh degree almost complete with a profesh job offer to do a logo). My lab and classroom have the “supervisor” placed at the back of the room so uh yeah no going back in forth between web surfing and InDesign. Just long hours plugging away on Adobe software coming home and my brain getting temporarily confused.

        I got a question do you work in the preview mode or the regular one with all the lines? Because I notice some people can’t handle all the damn lines even at the “data input” stage.

        My 3rd is basically the same as your 1st thought, but more “I don’t think they got the budget to compensate for me to destroy myself like that for parody. Meybeh submit a t-shirt design someday.”

      • No judgment whatsoever, these are glorious!

        My issue would be that I would spend 10 hours designing just one of these because letting things go is not a strong suit and they would be no more funny for it.

        • Ahaha thank you, i do know a little bit what you mean bc even though i dont have design training these covers take up more time for me than I’d like to admit!!!

    • When I see a printed billboard or some sort of advertisement on the street and I see that the kerning is way off, I WANT TO FIX IT. #graphicdesignerproblems

      • Yes, 100% with you on that problem! The worst is that my brain reads stuff like that as ALL my fault if I’ve been proofing a lot of jobs at work before they go to print because it still feels like it was my job to catch it and fix that stuff. Everything is ruined, I see design issues and typos and bad Photoshop jobs everywhere and it feels like a personal failure when it’s like, a realtor billboard on the side of the highway in a strange town.

        Ironically I’m sure there’s a typo somewhere in this comment that I didn’t notice.

      • Oh JP I been like than since I was a child, graphic design is what made realise I wasn’t out of my gourd or being too judgemental.
        My mother probably had to stop me from cutting up paper ads trying to fix them and wondered what in the damn hell did those billboards, street ads ever do me from the way I glared them.
        …..I was an intense child.

        #graphicdesignwomb2tomb

  7. wait, no one told me wearing tevas was gay!!!
    NOW I KNOW WHY I LOVE MY TEVAS!
    IT’S BECAUSE I’M GAY!!!!!

    seriously though, my sandals have been tevas for like 5 years. and now my sneakers are too!

  8. The “Girlfriend Jeans” bit made me inhale my coffee up my nose–so funny! Also, (in a general shout out to the universe) I’d like to see Kate McKinnon on more magazine covers, please!

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